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addicted.
ugh this sounds so wrong, and im so embarrased to write this. here goes.
i'm 13, and for a long time i've been.. well.. touching myself, and I guess masterbating. ever since I was like 5 or 6. I have no idea how it started.. and I didnt know what I was doing then, but I felt like it was horrendously wrong. Even now I do. I'm pretty ashamed of it, and I wish I hadnt done this so young, and learned some other things from bad places on the internet. I dont do the other things, but I know they're there. I'd rather be blissfully unaware till I was an adult and could handle it. But apparently I already know, and I dont wanna know any more. anyway, with the masterbating thing, i'd get some sort of object.. like cushions (i'd put them in the washer after), once a barbie doll (yes. i know. but im not a lesbo, I was like 8.), and like teddybears and stuff. It feels good, and sometimes I get horny and feel like doing it. All the time say it will be the last time, but its never the last time. I end up doing it again. So far, nobody has caught me or even known about it for all these years... I've been keeping it a secret. It even feels weird to post it here.. I've never told anyone about this, because I've been afraid... I mean.. how would they react? they'll think I'm some dirty little girl.. which is not how I act, though sometimes I may think a perverted thought.. because well.. I've heard it from other people online and IRL so I knew what they meant. I just dont know what to do.. I dont wanna like confess it to the world.. and im not even sure confessing it during church (which I hardly go to, because of my family's busy schedule.. but I wish I did. and im a christian.). its kinda scary.. because i doubt other kids do it, or even know what it is at my age (except for alot of boys) so at times i feel kinda... like.... wacko, and not normal. i know nobody is normal, but.. seriously nobody else really does this.. unless they keep it a secret, but I kinda doubt it. also, i forgot to say, that i got my period like right after my 10th birthday. I had it like a couple months before we had the talk about "periods and puberty" and stuff.. so I had no idea what I'd done, when I went to the bathroom and found blood in my pants. I thought that I either burst my bladdar, or it was because of me like.. humping stuff. then I had a problem with having really long periods lasting like more than week, so I went to the doctor, and the doctor and my mom asked if I'd put anything up "down there" or anything.. and I'm like "no", but I felt kinda pressured, like at any moment my cover would be blown. its so crazy.. i could go on about that.. but this is getting long already. sorry if i like disgusted you or anything, but like thanks alot for your help with your reply.
also, how do you know if your cherry has popped? could it happen from like.. doing what I've been doing? I hope not! I wanna be a virgin till I'm married..
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I guess everyone else gave you all the info i was going to give you but one thing i want to add is that you don't need to tell anyone. it's for you and only you... no need to confess. don't feel dirty about it either but if you want to be "clean" about it, stick to just using your fingers and wash up after. <3
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Well, first of all I can greatly shorten my answer by giving you one link:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
It will answer all of your questions. Okay, when I was reading your question I cant even BEGIN to tell you how many kids do the same thing. At the same age! We all experience differently..some kids do it at 5, some do it at 25. Its a combination of our environment, exposure and bodies! But like the website says, its PERFECTLY fine and normal to masturbate. I know you feel dirty, but thats normal too. No one feels great about masturbating. Sometimes the things that pleasure us most are the things that make us feel terrible because its such a private thing. Also, the church makes us feel bad about it, too and we have to hide it from our parents. Anything we feel we have to hide makes us feel guilty. So, its obvious why you feel guilty and dirty...its a secret. But, you know what? Its not that much of a secret. Everyone knows everyone else does it. Its going to happen sometime to everyone because its perfectly normal. Its not really you doing those things, its your body and your hormones raging. Also, you say no other girls do it? Not true. They probably are thinking EXACTLY what youre doing. You think that because its hard to picture certain people you go to school with every day doing that. I understand, but chances are they do too.
When your cherry pops, it hurts a little and bleeds a little, too. It can happen from something OTHER THAN SEX. Such as horseback riding, tampons, etc.
Just so you know - to not be a virgin, you have to actually have intercourse which means a guys penis INSIDE of you. Just because your hymen "cherry" is popped, doesnt mean youre not a virgin.
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There are 2 kinds of people, those that masturbate those that lie. It's perfectly normal and nothing to be ashamed of.
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This is not unusual at all. I go to gurl.com, a website for teen girls (I'm 21) just to answer questions like this and I've read dozens of stories from them just like this.
Your hymen can break from masterbation, but it doesn't mean you're not a virgin. Hymens break from all sorts of things: tampons, masterbation, horseback riding. You lose your virginity when you have sex and that's it.
When you're in high school, you'll hear people talk about this more and you'll relax about it.
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since you're thirteen, chances are you're not the only one. it's not necissarily a bad thing, and i can understand not wanting to tell your Mom. You don't have to tell anyone in your life right now, unless you go to gyno again, and the doctor asks. There's really no big deal in doing it, but if you feel really strongly, and embarrased about it, i'd try and stop. Because obvioulsy you're not okay with this. Sticking barbie's up there hardly qualifies as having sex; your cherry probably has popped, but that doesn't mean your not a virgin.
i don't have much advice to give, but i would try my best to stop, because it's a really horrible emotional thing to go through. You don't HAVE TO tell anyone either, but it may make you feel better.
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umm i dont think sticking barbie dolls or anything wouldnt make you a virgin so dont worry about that but how about with the holl masterbation thing you like stick with your finger....
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