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My boyfriend throws me around when he's drunk! What should I
I am 26 years old female...My boyfriend is a great guy the best boyfriend ever when he is SOBER....when he drinks hes a different person...hes mean to me and throws me around when i dont wanna deal with him....he has never hit me but he gets real rough with me and hits the door or will smash something...I'm scared i dont know what to do...he always says im the mean one or i hurt him but when hes on top of me i have to push him away he pins me down...i have talked to him about this but i really dont know what to do...i just got a place with him just 3 months ago and now i feel trapped...what should i do...does this happen to anyone else...how can i help him?
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first of all even though you feel trapped your not you have the power to walk out that door and leave him. dont feel trapped because hell use that against you if youve already talked to him about it and hes not changing then he never will. when he tells you you hurt him thats his way of trying to make you feel like the bad guuy but your not so dont fall for it. i grew up with an alcoholic dad and i know how they work. just get out of the relationship maybe you can stay with a friend or relative if your scared to confront him about leaving then wait until hes not home for a while pack upm all of your possesions but dont tell anyone what your going to do unless they are helping you do this. i say dont tell people about leaving him until afterwards because someone might tell him and he could suprise you. if he trys to win you back and says hell change dont buy into it because honest to god thats what they all say and if he hasnt already then he wont get out now and fast. i mean it.
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ok first of all you need to tell this guy he cannot be getting that drunk anymore and explain what happens when he does. If he can't do that you need to leave. No matter how difficult it will be on your heart or budget trying to move out. You always hear stories like this from women who are continuously abused by their husbands, and you have to realize you don't have to put up with it.
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You should really see some kind of counselor or something to work things through.
Because if you tried talking to him about it a countless number of times..
Then it's definetely not gonna get any better by telling him again.
So talk to someone about it and see what happens.
I'm sure everything will work out.
Good luck.
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Be chill, Everybody has the same problem with you when they're dealing with those whom alcoholic! they are unable to resist drinks, that's why they have those behaviors(abusive, rude). you doesn't like his behaviors, do you?You have to run away from that jerk! try to forget everything about him! how do you able to continue your relatinship with him if u become the only victims! forget him, my advice is Get the jerk away from your life! or something worse might happen in the future and you are the victims! keep smilling solve everything with a clear mind!
^_^"
9Dayz
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When he is sober, put on your most serious face and talk to him. Don't be hesitant or anything. Just talk to him. If he denies the fact that he's hurting you, then you'll probably want to end the relationship. Having a good friend by your side is always a good idea.
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The best way to help this guy is to walk away now. He may be great when he is sober, but when he is drunk how far will he go in attacking you? Will it be the black eye, the broken arm, the kick in the stomach or when you are dead?? You say he hasn't hit you but it is only a matter of time before he does - he will not be able to control his temper one day whilst he is drunk and then he will blame it on you.
Only he can decide if he is willing to stop drinking altogether so that you can be a normal couple together.
This kind of behaviour happens a lot. I have never been in your situation - for which I am truly grateful - but I do know of others who have been. You are not to blame for his drinking and drunken outbursts, but you are the one who is suffering because of them.
There are support groups for the partners/children of people who abuse drink and they may be able to help you decide what to do for the best for you.
Please walk away before he hurts you badly. I wish you all the best and take care.
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You can not change him. He is an alcoholic. Furthermore, he is dangerous, abusive, and oviously dosn't respect you. My advice: Move out-you shouldn't be living with your boy friend anyways. Call up your parents and/or friends and see if they can help you get back on your feet. Do you really think your future children deseve a father who drinks and turns abusive? Do you really think *YOU* deserve a husban who will treat you like this?
Get out sweety, you don't deserve this at all.
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Okay, I may be 12 years younger than you.. but i am wise beyond my years, I had the same experence.. except with my mom. I was 8 and she had a boyfriend who was a really incredbly nice guy.. when he was sober.When he got drunk he threw me and my mom, around leaving me scars and my mom bruses. One night when he got drunk, { i was there} he came home, he ended up getting mad saying that i was always mean to him and treating him like a piece of dirt, my mom interviened, long story short he tryed to kill her, but failed, he broke her neck, tramatized me and her and let me lifeless and with a broken leg, arm, and rib bone. My mom was ALMOST parlized from the neck down, he is in prison for 4 years and this has been that 3rd year he gets out next year. Little things can turn into something that can always be forever leaving you into something you may not live through. If you are scared and feel traped.. sit down tell him how you feel and if that dosen't work, please before its too late.. end the relationship. For me that experence i was luckey to have lived through.. its a blessing, but you never know what will happen next. So get out and move on before he either kills you.. or hurts you for a lifetime.. Good Luck and hope i helped you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Golden_Girl_800~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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