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arghhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!
well i have this so-called best friend.SHe can be lovely but she see's everything as a competition
Whenever I get my hair cut or get something new, she comes in with something to try and outdo me? I really dont see the point.Its like everything is a competition! And then she copies me with stuff and then claims its her own idea and try's to turn people against me.I know for a fact shes been bitching about me aswell but then when i confront her she just try's to suck up to me.
I would also confront her about all the competition but she just try's to turn it all back on me and its so frustrating.My mum thinks shes just jealous of me.But I have no idea what to do.
Someone help please..
muchloveamiixxxxxxxxxx
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
For a while ive had the same problem, but here what you do...
Just explain to her that if you guys are freinds, shouldn't you be happy for eachother, instead of trying to compete?
Another thing that may be your problem is that, your showing you care and letting her know whats wrong (dont worry, thats a good thing) but try not to over-do it, because when she knows your making a big deal out of it her plan has suceeded.
Peace.
-Jan
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Your mom is exactly right. This can tend to happen between best friends at some point or other ; they get jealous of eachother and try to out-do eachother and try and have the "better life" than the other one. It's sort of like a sibling rivalry, except a best friend rivalry.
Whenever people try to usually copy other people, this yes, can be taken in as flattery to you, but I understand the annoyance and everything of it. This probably means that she has some insecurities of herself, and you need to try and make her more secure. Whenevr she gets a new hair cut, let her know it looks great. If she does good on a test, congratulate her and everything and just try and get her confidence to be higher and make her have less insecurities about herself. Also try to push her to new ideas that she can have herself. Whenever you two go shopping anywhere, get your own clothes and everything, but help her try and pick out her own. If she looks at something, tell her that it'd look great on her, and that she should buy it.
Hopefully after a bit of confidence rising and less insecurities, she'll want to be her own person and want her own ideas and everything, and stop trying to take all yours.
As for the bitching behind the back and everything, she's probably just trying to grab the attention by gossiping about people behind their backs - even her best friend. Whenever people talk of others behind their backs there's probably something about them that gets to them, like you and the fact she's jealous of you and everything, but of course she doesn't want to lose you as a friend, because for one who would she copy from then and be "better" than then? The next time she does this let her know she's hurting your feelings and best friends shouldn't do that to eachother, and you know for a fact she is indeed gossiping about you behind your back, people have told you. And just let her know that if she has something to say, she can tell it to you, because best friends are supposed to be able to talk to eachother about everything and understand eachother.
I hope I helped.
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Your friend is always trying to outdo you, so she probably is jealous and is most likely insecure.
The best thing to do is to make her feel good about herself. Compliment her on her hair/eyes/figure and if she ever comes up with things, tell her what a great idea it is. In lessons, tell her if you think she's done good work, and congratulate her if she gets a high mark or gets a really good score in a test. She will feel more secure and self-confident, so won't feel the need to prove how good she is to other people.
As for her bitching behind your back and then sucking up, she oviously wants to appear in a good light so is nice to your face. This is another sign that she's insecure so carry on making her feel good. You can't just ignore the bitching though, talk to her in private and tell her that it upsets you when she says mean things about you (say "It upsets me when you say mean things about me", not "I don't like it when you're mean"). If she sucks up to you then tell her that she doesn't need to, you'll still be her friend, but that you don't want her to keep saying mean things about you behind your back. Tell her that if you ever upset her or make her annoyed then she should come and talk to you about it, instead of moaning to other people.
Hope I Helped,
*+*TropicalBabe*+*
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It is obvious that she is jealous of you .Your better than her and dont let her get the better of you.Ignore the stupid things she does she isn't worth it even if she is supposed to be your friends.Confront again if she is ignoring you - just continue telling her how you feel because she really is listening to you - just dosnt want to accept that you are right.Maybe help her to hang round with others as she may just be inscure about herself and being with a group of friends helps you accept yourself.
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