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Sixteen, male and baffled
I'll start by describing myself as I have been described by people:
I write amazing songs on guitar. I'm the best actor in my high school's theater company. According to many I'm the smartest kid they know. According to a similar number I'm extremely attractive. They claim that I'm also one of the nicest, easiest-going and can hold stupid and intellectual conversations with anyone equally well.
Okay. I'm not an egotistical selfless son of a bitch. These are things people have said to me. Here's something that bothers me: I have never had a girlfriend. I've never even been on a real date. Ever. I came close a few times, but then one girl decided to tell me yes when she really meant she didn't like me that way, and then another got as far as telling me what to tell her dad when I came to pick her up, but then changes her mind an hour later, because. No real specific reason, end of two or three weeks of getting to know eachother and whatever.
I keep trying. I generally don't like to approach girls like that unless I make eye contact and float a smile across once or twice and have one returned. Everyone else says that works, and then you go talk to them. I can't even make eye contact.
So, am I just an unlikely kid who should shut up and stop bitching and moaning, or is there some insight anyone might have here? I'm inclined to believe the first one, really.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I don't think that you're "an unlikely kid who should shut up and stop bitching and moaning...", you just sound like you're having some trouble with girls. All guys, if not at the least, most, go through this at least once in their life. My guy friends have gone through it.
You sound like you have a better head-start then most of them ever did. It's true, most girls like eye-contact. I let you in on a secert, when a girl looks in your direction and catches your eye, it was on purpose. She'll then turn away and talk to her friends, again done on puropse. The whole thing is for a girl, she's told that if she does that, and then looks back , and the guy is still looking at her, he's interested. Hopefully that's true or I messed up with my ex on that.
If you want to talk to a girl keep eye contact and walk up to her. Say hi, and introduce yourself, if she doesn't already know. Tip: Don't talk about the weather or other things, like things you talk about when you're "with the guys". If she's in the same class as you, branch off from there. Liek if she's in your history class, ask if you can borrow her notes from even if you already have the notes. Ask her for some pointers, and sit down and talk to her while you're talking. See if you a band in common, or even a movie, like a new that just came out. You could ask her if she wants to see it with you a few friends of your's and her's. It's a start, you have to take baby steps.
Hope this helps, if at all.
~Everyone's favoite Little angel, notalittleangel345
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well it would so make sience why you cant get a girlfriend your approch is all wrong.dont do trhat normal guy shit ,as you can see alot of girls are never interested.If you see a girl youu really like dont sit there and try and get her attention ,just go up and talk to her,show her your not like the rest of the stuborn ass-whole guys.another tip is start out as there friend and then wait for them to come to you,dont worry it will happen.
let me know what you think
lots of love,lizzie
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SAME HERE
BUT I CANT GET A BOYFREIND!
oh my gosh.
i cant even make eyecontact with a guy.
its just weird
i think its just because girls expect so much more like for you to talk to them and make the first move and all that
but yeah.
i dont know.
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Hey,
As i read your problem , i concluded that you are a very talented person with many amazing gifts that could give alot of entertainment to other people later on, because you could be something of a star when you grow up with your skilled acting and singing abilities.
And at the same time, it really depresses me to know that you haven't found someone to love and care about and go out with and hang out with and have alot in common with, but i need to tell you, that you can't just sit there a wait for love, because love just doesn't come that easy, but it comes when it is meant to come. i hope you understand what i am trying to say here, but i just don't want you to waste your time thinking of somethingthat could be hopeless at the moment, and right now. so just concentrate on your music and acting and stuff, and when love is meant to come, then it will come and it will come alone , you don't have to go out there and make eye contact ,smile or wink. Because this is not what will make a person fall in love with you. So just let things settle down and fall in place alone, and they will and i am sure, and one day, you will post a problem here and say that you are having a fight with your girlfreind, and asking us here on the website about what you should do about it. lol.
so don't rush things and just act natural and cool, and take advantage of what you have and thank god about it, and leave that love thing a side for now until it comes by itself.
Goodluck:)
xoxoxoxo
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babe dont even worry. youre not the only one. even though im a girl, and apparently the only one on this page that is in the same situation as you (or something like it). im not sure how old you are so i cant relate to you, but still. you are just in the wrong place at the wrong time.
personally, i think school is a shitty place to meet people. my school is tiny and i know almost everyone and most of the guys are either horny beyond belief or my friends.
you just need to be patient and wait for the right girl because when you find her, you'll know it, and it'll be worth the wait. you sound like a cool dude so either try to find a girl somewhere else (restaraunt, party, bookstore, movie theater, concert, waterpark, etc).
and NO you shouldnt stop bitching and moaning because if you do then you will have given up all hope for the bitchers and moaners out there who also dont have dates!
ohh and i just saw at the heading that youre 16. alrighty then im 15...not much difference...and there is my little relation. i havent had a real boyfriend either except for this kid in 7th grade but really, does that count? we didnt even do anything.
anyway good luck to ya
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Dude, I have a similar situation(I'm sixteen and male). I have many talents, and I'm a generally smart and nice person. <<just felt like I may enlighten you to the fact that your not the only one.
Currently, I'm just sitting back and enjoying the ride w/o all the relationship crap that people have to deal with. Just make yourself available to girls and make the first moves on the girls. Ask them out. Take them to movies.
If you like someone, get about 2 guys to go do something one day(like the movies). Invite the girl and tell her who else is going and that she should get some of her friends to go. Then you just make moves from there. Best of luck to you, and if you find something that works, tell me.
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Hey here is the perspective of not only a woman but a professional mental health worker who works with teenage girls! So it sounds to me like your problem is your too nice. Sounds stupid I know but alot of teenage girls while saying they want a nice guy prefer the guy with a little danger. My suggestion to you would be to "fake dis-interest" in a girl you like, in other words play it cool and casually smile at a girl you think is attractive, then turn away, the mystery will interest her.
I know it sounds like game playing but I have seen it work before. If you need more advice let me know.
Hope this helps.
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Ok, your kind of like me, I really don't know how to flirt and I'm a girl!! It's supposed to be programed into every girl. Not me. Anyway, I advise just ask one of your friends to either hook you up or go on what my guyfriends call it, girl-shopping. AKA: go to the mall, eat watch girls. To me, its perverted but it may work. I would make sure you know who the heck the girl is though.
*~*~*~Don't be shy*~*~*~
-shygirl66
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it seems like your a really great guy.
somebody whose not one-sided.
if you don't have a girlfriend,
it's maybe because you haven't found the right person you want to be.
i'm not saying you're "soulmate" or something,
but in order to have a relationship with somebody,
you would have to have something in common,
or something you like about each other.
somebody you can open up to.
but if you haven't found that person,
then that's fine.
someday you'll find the courage in you to approach a girl,
but if it's not the time,
you can't make yourself do it.
just have patience.
you don't have to have a girl with you everytime.
sometimes it's better to just be with your friends.
i'm not sure if this is what you want to hear,
but this is my thought about this.
but if you need anything,
just ask me.
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Wow , well I don`t think you`re an "unlikely kid who should shut up and stop bitching and moaning" You seem like a normal kid who`s got a big future infront of him and that`s really cool , but most girls think that`s pretty nerdy at this age , but that dosen`t mean you should stop doing any of the stuff you do. I think you should pick out a girl you like , & then write her a song on your guitar and play it for her ( yeah it`s tough to do that , but alot of girls love that , i think that`s so sweet ) & You said you`re attractive , so that`s a good thing. & just try to give the girl eye contact it`s not hard just look her in the eyes and say what you gotta say , yeah it gets kind of weird after a minute ro two , but you can do it! I hope I helped , & don`t worry you`ll find a girl ♥ =]
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