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Am I really in love....?
Sorry in advanced if it is long. I'm 16/f. So, I broke up with my bf of 4 months a month ago. And the same exact day he got a new gf. And he didnt bother telling him, I found out at a party, I saw them together. And it didn't feel right to me, like he shouldn't have moved on so quickly. But I wasn't really jealous I don't think. And we are still friends, which I'm glad for, and I'm constantly going online to see if he is on. And when he is, my heart starts to race like crazy, and I'm like so happy. We can talk forever but little stuff, we just always find things to talk about. I also think about him all the time no matter what, it drives me crazy. And when I'm not talking to him, I feel a little depressed. I'm just scared that if we do get back together, it will end up like the past. I really don't want to hurt him again, I would just hate myself. And after we broke up, I told myself that I did love him, but just that it was just friendship love. But now I"m not too sure. Can I really still be IN love with him? And I just also need some advice on how to deal with these feelings if they won't go away. I'm just really confused and need some advice.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Hi, first of all ask yourself,
Do I feel a special bond for him?
Do you feel deep deep emotions for him?
Do you like him for who he is?
Do you feel alot of affection and desire for him?
If you answered yes to those then it is likely that you love him.
Do have lots of sexual desire for him?
Are you attracted to him because of his looks?
Are you jelouse because he's taken up?
Do you fantasize and have a crush on him?
If you answered yes to those questions then it is likely you feel lust towards him.
Difference being:
LUST: Sexual desire and attraction for him usually you havn't known him for a while.
LOVE: Strong bond and deep deep emotional feelings for him, care about him and have known him for some time now.
Now compare the list and answer the questions and you should know how you feel towards him. It sounds as though it may be lust, but see if you can work it out. Daniel.
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Oh wow I think everygirl knows how this feels hun. I went out with a guy and he got back with this girl in a week, but omg a day? There's just those people out there who make you feel great and you just love talking to a being with. Usually after serious relationships that are long you'll always have strong feelings for that person no matter what. Its so great that you two are good friends, and you seem like a great girl! But it was really low of him to go right to another girl, it shows immaturity. You should still stay close with him, and just remeber whats meant to be will always find its way. He'll eventually see hopefully that you were always there and you're everything he wants. If things go wrong, hard to do it but block him out of your life for a while.. dont talk to him and when you start to think about him, DONT. Also try talkin to other guys, theres so many out there and even though they might not seem like they could compare, they just might. I wish you the best of luck!
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Oh do I know how your feeling. It really wasn't cool of him to move on that day. But I'm wondering if he did because he wanted to show you something, like that he could get a girlfriend right away. I guess thats not important. But you just need to know that your 16 years old, and you sound like a great girl. You have the rest of your life to find a guy you truely love and want to be with every second. For now you should just have fun, and stop worrying. It's so tough, but the way I got over it was just thinking good about myself. I was like heck if he wants to go out and get a girlfriend thats fine, but I am going to have fun to. If you guys are friends thats great remain friends. But don't ever wait for him, and if you truely are in love it will work itself out. But like I said don't wait, just live your life. They are tons of other guys out there, that would be lucky to have you and you should just have fun. If your reading this and then you go online and wait to see if he's on then just think to yourself it will work itself out. Don't be confused, and don't be jealous, just have fun in life. If it is really love, then it will work out I promise. And also, I almost can promise you that when he see's you've pretty much moved on as well, and your just having fun I think he will miss you and want you to be back with him. Then from there it's all up to you! Good Luck. I hope I helped at all. Write me with questions or if you want to tell me how things worked out. I love feedback good and bad!
Love,
Molly
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omg i just got over this same problem. i know it sux that he is with another girl. after i broke up with my ex he went back to his ex then when they broke up he came back to me and then he broke up with me and that same day he waqs going out with this chick and didn't even tell me and we broke up once in five months and it was for like 1 hour he was only going out with her to get back at me for dumping and he said i still love you brianna and i told him that i still loved him too. but i was sick of being his go back to girl and so now were friends but barely tell him that you love and it was a mistake that you broke up with him thats is how i got schuyler back but i hope this helps. good luck.
*~Brianna~*
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hey I have a feeling that your really into him you remind me of my and boyfriend we only went out for a month because he didn't feel the same then like he noticed what he lost and we went out and now were going out for 7 months but what I'm tryin to say is talk to him but I understand he has a girlfriend I think you feelin this because you saw that he moved on quickly so your bothered... but hey look I believe your x wasn't heatrbroken because I believe he was talkin to some girl behind your back and and havin her waitin for him incase of anythin I'm not tryin to make him look bad but if you see him movin on why is he stoppin you you should just go out a lot spend time with your family just find anythin just to distract and like don't be goin online a lot just for him well hope I helped =)
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Well sweetie, he now in a relationship you know? You can admit it would hurt, and definitly feel awkward and not right for you. Because hello, in your mind its you and him, not him and some chick. But yeah I know how you feel about getting online to talk to him, nervous, etc. Yeah, dont dwell on him, because if he's already moved on (dating another girl) then chances are your not going to get back together with him. You can still be in love with him, its always possible, just like if someone you love dies, you will always love them, until you feel you can move on from that loss. To move on from a break up, the best thing I can suggest is go out with friends, have FUN!, dont think about him, I know thats so hard, because people used to tell me that too about this guy, and I couldnt ever get him out of my head or off my brain! ahh. So I know how you feel. If you need someone to talk to, on my advice column I have addresses for aim or msn that you can reach me on :)
<3
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hey,
First of all, i'll tell you a short story which might help you with this situation. I had a friend of mine who dated a guy for about 3 months, and she was crazy shit about him and they loved each other. but there came a time, when things got a little out of hand and they eventually ,had to break up. And at exactly the same day they broke up, he made a new girlfriend. Very insensitive, huh? Anyway, they stayed close friends and talked alot,at least he treated her like a friend, but she didn't. She still loved him so much, and she was still so crazy about him.She kept having those depressed moments everyday she sees them together or if he mentions his girlfriend, and she stayed like that for over 2 months, until she made a new group of friends and got wrapped up into alot of other things in her life, and she simply got over him.
So i see what i am trying to tell you, I know that you love and yes you are still crazy in love with him, and i am not sure how long your gone stay loving him, but soon it all those feelings will just go away and your gonna totally get over him. Therefore try to think and do anything else when you started thinking of him,and make new friends, and who knows mabye you'd meet a new cute guy and he'd ask you out. And you know something, I am sure that you are an extrememly amazing person, and that there are alot of guys out their who would really want to be with you and wouldn't ever think of breaking up what so ever, and that your ex boyfriend was not the only boy in the world, there is alot more and better than him. So cheer up, and if you have any further problems or worries, be free to contact me.
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