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negativity
I RATE 5s. Im 14/f and I have a lot of small problems that I can't discuss with my friends. Well.. I can, but they have problems of their own to deal with. Even when they tell me their problems, sometimes I freak out that night- not because of their problem, just from too much negativity in my life. Sometimes I really want to cut... but I hate blood, so I can never go through with it. I think I might give out a "i have no problems" kind of vibe. I don't show up as an emotional person cus I don't want people to see that. I don't have THAT many problems,its just things build up inside me. I have no one to talk to about issues- I won't be talking to my parents about them, so please don't give that advice. I also have major trust issues because of most of my friends during elementry school. So if I do tell my friends something, I end up freaking out that night thinking they will tell someone. I'm not emo, I dont dress it, act like it, or any of that. I'm just sad on the inside. Most of my sadness lately is caused of loss of control over my life. I REALLY like this guy and he has a gf... but theres nothing i can do about it. My grades are going down and theres not much I can do to change them... stuff like that.
Thanks SO much. Sorry it was so long.
-anomynous-
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I know EXACTLY how you feel.
During my time at high school, I suffered depression unbeknown to my friends and family. I did eventually bring myself to cutting, it lasted around 2 years and I finally moved on...
Mine too was caused by issues with elementary friends. Would I be close if I said that the reason you can't talk to your friends about it is that they were the elementary friends that caused your trouble? Also that your parents would brush off your feelings as 'stupid' and mostl likely tell you off rather than be of any help?
Anyway, if you're not a cutter, please try to avoid that path. I'd be wrong to say it doesn't help, but it is only a TEMPORARY resolve, and in the following days brings you feelings of pain and guilt.
Some ideas for you...
* purchase a stress ball - digging your nails into these when you feel urges can release a lot of tension and provide you with the same numbness cutting can.
* excercise - gives a feeling of accomplishment and confidence
* sleep - when do you most get the urges to cut? is it late at night? it was for me. so get to bed early and wake up feeling bright.
* hot chocolate - warm milk releases many feel good and relaxation thingywatsits. try it!
I got through without speaking to friends or family, if you want to talk to someone about it I suggest sites like this. See people in your situation just as I'm doing now, and be strong for someone else. It's a real booster in keeping your mind set on your goal.
And the last thing, guys at your age? Psssh, and this time in your life SO NOT WORTH THE EXTRA STRESS. You feel you have no control of your life, so concentrate extra hard on your schoolwork, lift your grades, find some direction and gain control of who you are as a person, before you try to share that with someone else. And believe me, once you have yourself under control, your lovelife will be a lot happier.
Hope I've improved your day! Feel free to email me if you'd like to talk further.
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ok this is extremely creepy... you are like me... like a mirror me haha. minus the cutting and the fact you even use the word emo.
Anyway the point is i know how you feel. And whatever you do dont harm your body in anyway, through cutting or drugs or anything like that. It will only make it worse trust me.
I know how it feels to be known as the girl with no problems... the one whose life is great and helps everyone else with there problems. Im that girl, and i know its hard because you sit there helping other people but you just cant help yourself. Jus realize that you can trust your friends, i mean they're trusting you with there problems.
Not everyone is going to screw you over and go behind your back. If you tell people your problems they will help you. And just because they have problems doesnt mean they cant help you with yours. Sometimes telling people makes everything better. And if you dont think you can trust your friends... you could always tell the people on here your problems, wed love to help lol.
I'm not an insanely emotional person either, but like i said its creepy.. because i feel the same way you do. The way i get throught it is with my friends, and music. Do things you love to do it helps. But if you keep bottling things in youll end up hurting yourself, and probably others. Its the best thing to do.
And my grades are going down too... but its because we are so stressed out we cant put all of our focus into our grades. Which is another reason why you have to let how you feel out.
As for the guy you like... you can always wait for him to break up with his gf... or as mean as it sounds... flirt with him a little to let him know that you like him, he might even like you more than his gf.
I really hope i helped... and if you want to talk to someone you can im me on aim at ii l 0 V E x UU << zero not oh
yahoo: x3candiigurrrl :: x3candiigurrrl@yahoo.com
Re Re <3
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hey! ok first of all, im really glad that you're not cutting because that only conceals your problems for a little bit of time, and then adds on another problem on top of them all! the reason people cut anyway is because they hold so much pain inside, that they hurt themselves physically in order to focus on that pain and forget about their emotional pain. it doesn't work in the long run! what you need to do is talk to someone! ok so you don't want to tell your friends or your parents, but there are plenty of other people.
you can go to your school councelor as many times as you need and talk to her/him... that's why they're there! just tell them you want to keep this between you and them, and they will not tell a single person! they're not allowed to!
if that's not an option that you like, then you can always just come on this website and discuss your problems with people here... even if they are small problems! it doesn't matter, everyone will see your problem and try and make you look at it a different way, and make it easier for you to deal with it! or you can call one of the many teen hotlines... they are free and confidential, and you can find many by just searching on google for one!
what im trying to say is that you HAVE to talk to someone about your problems and let them out! you can't keep them bottled up inside because they will just add and make you snap! just try talking about your problems and you will see how much easier things will become. you'll be able to see that your problems are really not that bad, and that things can be much much worse. life is not easy... it's a struggle, but as soon as you learn how to deal with all the small problems that come along the way, you will be SO happy and have complete control! :) good luck and don't hesitate to ask for more advice if you need it!
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Well...first off, I seriously think you should express your emotions by writing. Write in a journal or diary or some sort. Put a lock on it..so no one can enter. I express a lot of anger/sadness by writing on the COMPUTER on my online journal..and it helps..a lot. It makes me feel a lot better.
Secondly, find a new guy to like. Believe me..there are countless guys you'll like.
And third...I know I am a stranger or you might think I'm no help what-so-ever...but I'm here for you. Who am I going to tell? No one..exactly. So I'm always here for you and if you need advice or encouragement or any of that stuff..just tell me.
-Love-
Maggie
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