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Things Are Messed Up .. Sry If Long, I'll Rate!
Things have been really not too good lately. I'm 15, female and I know this is the time when everybody changes. But OK I have 2 BFFs - like, I have other best/close friends but these 2 are like my best best friends if that makes sense - well anyway, I am not too fond of change and seems like everything is changing. Last week was our spring break, these 2 girls and I usually would have done everything together, but we didn't hang out that much by ourselves, only in bigger groups and only sometimes. We don't feel like BFFs anymore. And another thing, one of them is switching schools next year to go to a private school, so IDK. Can someone just help me, explain to me whats going on? The one girl, Michelle, was kinda being mean to me and they don't seem to tell me stuff anymore. Should I just forget about them and hang with other friends? But they're my BEST friends and I will miss that. Also, not Michelle but the other one, her dad was just diagnosed with cancer so maybe thats making her act weird and I want to be there for her but Michelle has no excuse. I'll rate 5s for anything that helps, sorry if its long and confusing! But tomorrow in Italian we're supposed to pick partners for this big project and Michelle's in my class so I don't know how that will go .. so just help me please! Oh, and I haven't talked to them about it and I don't think we could really TALK about it. But, anyway, Thanks!
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
unfortunatly things change all the time especially with friends, most friends grow apart because they don't need each other anymore. If you really can't talk to your friends then maybe your friendship with them wasn't ment to last forever it might be a good idea to start making new friends but still be friends with your old ones.
hope this helps any, xshandix
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try to talk to them , if they are really your BEST friends than they will understand , also try to be your friends (the one with the dad with cancer) try to be her shoulder to lean on. and really be there for her and let her know that you will try to help as much as you can . and the other friend , try to talk to her and get to know her . try planing a day for all of yall. like call your friends and ask if they want to go to the movies or something.i hope i helped!
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They are your best friends, you have to talk to them about it. Communicating makes your friendship ALOT better. Like you said, the other girl may be going through alot since her dad was diagnosed with cancer, so be there for her. As for michelle, talk to her, whats the worst thing that could happen? seriously. You should get closer with your other friends too. But you may think now that michelle and the other girl are your best friends, but people change. I know you probaly dont want to here that but its really hard to stay friends with someone forever. I just lost my all time best friend (so i thought) and she turned out to be so different because she changed.. theres nothing you can do if they do change, its there loss if they stop being friends with you, and youll have other friends you get closer with. Maybe youre lucky.. that youll be BFF's with those girls forever, all you need to do is talk to them. good luck ;)
-beckss
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its hard to think now that one day you might not be best friends. it might seem stupid telling them so maybe just arrange to do more things wif them so you dont feel like your becoming seprate people. but its always a good thing to have a lot of friends so if some arnt there you will hav someone there for you. maybe your friends fell the same way to? why not invte them over and just talk about things you cant stop change so dont try to just think of i as a way to make more friends
i hope you stay friends
kim
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Dear Messed Up,
Okay, so you don't want to tell these girls (who you call best friend's) that you're uncomfortable with how they've been treating you? It's interesting that you can't really talk to your best friends.
You might want to ask yourself what qualities make a "best" friend. I would think being able to share what's on your mind & in your heart would be MOST important of all!
Let's face it, you can hang out & do sufff with just about anybody, BUT having an honest relationship with a best friend is someting special. It sounds like you've got some thinking to do about what you need from your friendships.
Also, what responsibility do you have to do your part (as in, being honest) concerning the friendship? All friendships go through trying times and require a little give and take, but I know of NO "best" friendships that can survive without honesty!
Take Care,
Earth Mother
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things do change a lot.. yah, its hard to get used to. i would just say stil mantain your relationship with your best friends, but also meet new people and start becoming better friends with others. start spending more time with your other close friends. yes, it will be hard and you probably will miss them, but hey, it's michelle's fault for treating you like that. her loss, right? the other girl, she may just be having some personal problems w/ her family + such and she may need you to be there for her now more than ever. it might be good to talk to michelle, because if she is your best friend, won't it be worth it? but, like i said, start hanging with your other close friends, too. if you need any more help, drop one in my inbox. good luck.!
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