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worried about my freind
My best friend is over weight. My other freinds and I are all skinny. Well, I found out she is on a diet and trying to loose enough weight to look good in a bathing suit. And I think that's so great and stuff. She sent me this question on Advicenators on what she should do ... I found out it was her and said we should talk. I'm waiting for her to say something to me. i told me two other freinds.. all four of us are BFs. I'm worried she's on a bad diet. She's been overweight her whole life.Should we talk to her about it? I know if we did she would get all offensive. She doesn't dress for her body type and I don't know what to say. Should we talk to her? What should we say? What if she gets mad? What advice could we give her? I WILL RATE 5S!
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i was just looking through the site and ofund this question too.. i already wrote you a long answer on the other one. i'm not on a bad diet, i am on a healthy diet eating all my meals & eating healthily, and exersizing more. my mom knows, and i have her body and she went through the same things when she was younger. im not loosing insane amounts of weight because im not like majorily overweight or anything, i'd just like to loose prob 10 more pounds or so, so i could look average by summer. you don't have to be worried about me and i am glad that you care. i am telling you this and what i told you in my other answer because i know i can trust you and you have told me that you are here for me. if we ever talked abotu it in person which would be very very hard for me, i wouldn't wanna talk to all 3 of you. probably just you. but, i just wanted to ask you, what do you mean i don't dress for my body type? am i supposed to wear clothes i don't want to wear just bc im a little bigger right now? like idk. im sorry if you dont care ab any of this or dont wanna here it. but you seem like you care and are concerned so imm explaining this. anyway.. i mean im not sure how i feel about talking in person but mariss i hope you know we can talk about anything. i just dont want it to be that whole 3 to 1 thing.. and i don't see why it was neccesary to tell megh and kris, as i already said i'd much rather just have this talk with you or any of this with just you. you are my best friend and i wouldn't talk to any of my other friends about this. my weight is my business.. you are some of my best friends, but.. it makes me uncomfortable to know that all of you guys know and im kind of rambling but ....... its hard for me to explain anything but if you want to i guess we could talk some time but im just warning you i dont know how it will go ill try not to get offensive but i may get embarassed and insecure and who knows what else.. im trying to be understanding and i hope you can be too. im sorry im telling you all this through advicenators and gohs maybe i shoudlnt be doing this maybe you should delete these after you read them just in case someone else will read them but ... im not mad at you or anyhting, i hope yhour not mad at me and if you want to talk yah idk what else to say this is way too long.. but thanks for caring. <3
what i wrote on the other question you asked was;
you don't have to talk to me.. i really can handle this myself. it's good to know that you are there for me, but i am doing what i can and i am doing it the right way. it's something that is just in my genes, if you look at my family .. i mean, i know it's probaly hard for you guys to understand you are lucky and don't have that problem. but you know, i have to work just to become normal & yeah it is hard. ever since i was a little girl it's been an issue, and it is the most sensitive subject i have and my biggest insecurity. even if i eat the exact same as you and whoever else, i guess i just have a slower metabolism and i put on weight when you wouldn't. im active & i dont eat excessive amounts, i am trying to eat really healthy and exersize as much as i can. i know this probably isn't the right way to discuss this with you through advicenators and all, i realize this now and you may not even want to here all of this but i want you to understand even though its hard, and i would try to talk about it in person or other places but .. its really sensitive for me and i can't just bring it up in a conversation, ya know? and i don't really want to its embarassing. but i don't need people telling me im overweight.. the doctor even told me that i was normal weight for my height and such, but that doesn't mean that i'm happy with my body. i know im not skinny, i never will be skinny. i just want to be average and look good. yes its hard for me but i'm exersizing and eating right so that i can wear what i want and feel comfortbale with myself. its hard for me and i am trying to be as honest with you as i can so i really hope you don't take offesnse to any of this im just trying to explain, sorry that this is so long.
-sara.
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To me, you must be a very good friend to this girl.
You shouldn't really worry much. But if she starts to act weird, and has gone to the bathroom or hasn't been feeling well lately, or having problems, then that's the time to get worried.
If any of that DOES happen, you should talk about it to an adult, any adult that you could trust. and maybe things could get better for you're friend.
Hope I helped :]
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You shouldn't worry too much about your friend, but if you notice her not eating at all, losing weight rapidly, or going to the bathroom a lot, you might have to worry! Try to do more activities that keep you moving as BFs, like going outside and taking a walk instead of watching tv or going to a movie. Most likely is that your friend will be helped by getting active. Crash diets usually won't help. But use your better judgement on this one, and you'll be able to tell, you know her best.:)
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Why don't you just answer the question she sent you? She probably is uncomfortable talking to you in person, hence the reason she asked you on Advicenators.
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