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My friend has been raped by three people
My girlfriend(17years old) has been raped by three different people. She only trusts me and hasnt got the confidence to tell anybody else. This means that the responsibility is down to me to give her my own sort of counseling service. I'm not really sure as to what to do apart from help her get it all out. Please could somebody give me some tips on more counselling advice? It would be much appreciated.thankyou x
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Well, let her know first that she's not a bad and nasty person. She's shouldn't be ashamed of herself. That it's the guys WHO should be ashamed of raping a complete stranger, b/c the can't get a woman to touch them (ha ha). Then you have to tell the police and her parents b/c the police will find the idiots who did this and her parents just need to know these things b/c that's their daughter and they love her. If they find the guys she should go and identify the guys to not let them rape any more defenseless girls. Also take them to court and testify. It may be hard to do, but you have do it to get rid of the assholes who did and put them away for good. Hope i helped!!
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Sounds like you are a very nice person to want to help. If the rapists have not been prosecuted, then go with her to the police. Otherwise she needs to speak with someone that works at a rape crisis center. While your support will continue to be very important this is such a specialized area of counseling. Go with her and be by her side, but she will need to do this in attempts to prevent serious problems later on. There is no shame in being the victim.
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First of...go to the police. And if you would feel bad carrying her try calling them on a non emergency line and reporting it. Then try remembering she's going to goo thru a hard time and maybe she doesn't know what she's doing and sometimes she'll just break down! You personally hve to be her walll for her to lean on and try to keep your calm with her! Thirdly try gettin some pro help for her. It doesn't hve to be like a shrink or ne thing try boys and girls hotline and slowly but surely she'lll be fine! Make sure u tell the police though!
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I don't agree with the other people about her going to the police yet. I think you need to get her to go to a pychologist. I mean yes, you can help her, but she also needs some professional help. So I would really try to talk her into going to a professional, and then maybe the police later.
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she really should go to the police as soon as possible. if they know right away there is more they can do. if she waits too long (up to 5 years i think) she is over the statue of limitations and there is NOTHING the police will be able to do to put the men who raped her behind bars. the men who did it deserve to have their junk cut off and the only way they will get some sort of punishment is if you and her go to the police. offer to go to the police with her...but when you talk to her about going...just tell her you want her to go to the police so the men who did it cant do it to anybody else. rape is one of the most horrible crimes out there. i dont know how i would deal with it if it happened to me but the police need to be notified of the situation and your friend needs to get medically examined. the rapists could have done more damage than what you think. if they didnt use condoms. she could get STD's or she could get pregnant. please try to talk her into going to the police. if she doesnt want to...you should tell the police. yea she may get mad at you at first but in the end she will thank you for it because she will get the counseling she needs and the medical attention...plus you'd be doing women all over a huge favor. dont let what happened to your friend happen to other women too. good luck and my sympathy to your friend. hope i helped you out.
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Firstly, you are NOT a professional councellor which is what your gf needs. Someone who has been raped, especially by 3 different people would have been traumatized, and I'm actually shocked that she even is dating you considering how shattered her self confidence and self worth are. You must be a very special young man for her to be able to open her heart to you and tell her this horrible secret. For that I commend you.
So in the meantime, you must be careful when you choose your words, listen to her with compassion, and NOT pressure her into any sexual activity until she's ready. I've heard stories of girls who were raped or abused by previous bf's, and when their new bf's tried to make a move on them they would freak out.
Is it possible that you could talk to your school counsellor and tell him/her the situation? If your gf is too uncomfortable to talk to someone from school, maybe the counsellor could refer her to someone else. Remind her that everything she says would stay confidential.
She might even need to talk to a psychiatrist. Is she depressed? Is she on any medication? I'm wondering if she might be better of on an anti-depressant. I used see a pyschiatrist to help me with my depression and she prescribed prozac. It did wonders for me.
I wish you all the best, and hope you can get your gf some badly needed help.
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