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kill myself?
I don’t know what to do anymore, my life seems to be dying slowly even though I am alive. I don’t want to live anymore; I have imagines everyday of me jumping out my window. My life just seems all messed up. It may seem like nothing to you but all my problems put together are just killing me little by little. No one understands. Today I came from school all upset I couldn’t take it and told my grandmother I don’t want to live anymore. She got mad, called my mom and dad and was yelling at me telling me how lazy I am. She kept saying I’m just a lazy person that wont get anywhere in life without studying. She kept yelling and talking and now her and my mom got into a fight over this. My grandma tried to make this all seem like she’s the victim and I’m taking advantage of her. She kept saying with a grandchild like me the one who cries for every little reason she should just take an overdoes and die. Why on earth would she say all these things when she knows how I feel about life! I go to her are you crazy you bitch, don’t you understand why I want to kill myself you are one of the main reasons. I don’t have a main reason its juts that I’m very unlucky, I have really low self cofidecne, some people tend to make fun of my face, since I have acne and put a lot of cover up on. Which hurts the most because I had acne for about five years and I tried everything, I went everywhere, took her pill possible, and nothing works. It’s like a long rode that never ends no matter how hard you try. You keep running and running until you think you got to the end but it just keeps on going. That’s how my life feels. Now we got new teachers and new students in our classrooms. I hate most of my classes, and most of all I hate my math teacher. Now I’m really bad at math I mean really bad I don’t even know what 7 times 8 is unless I think about it for half an hour. Yeah sad I know. Hes really mean and trys to bring people who are not as smart as him down. I tired getting out of his class but my counselor is such a bitch! She told me to come early to school today so she could change my singing class since they put me in the wrong one. They put me back to the one I already took, so I would be learning everything all over and I passed her class with a 90. I come back at the end of the horrible day I had and she tells me the teacher said its okie and I can stay in that class. I was like butt … she stooped me and said theres nothing I can do. I was like but wait im learning everything over again I don’t understand. She goes yeah I know but then we would have to change your whole program I was like sooo you do it for everybody else. I know shes just a fucken lazy bitch that needs to get fired, Counselor my ass. I don’t know what to do! I hate schhol and wanna quite im only 16 but I don’t see school in my future. My grandma makes me feel like shit about this but I don’t know what to do!!! Please help and don’t say talk to her because that wont work ill just end up killing myself faster. I don’t know what to do with my life. Please answer if you ever felt like this about school and juts ur whole life and tell me what you
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
welll, you were meant to live. you were meant to be happy and you were meant to live for a reason. dont be ashmaed of yourself or anything. everyone has problems in there life, but that dosent mean you give up. Little by Little, youre life will get better it will just take some time.
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I have had this same problem. I had things falling aparty in my life. I never smiled, never felt like doing anything, and my friends and family were all like, just get over it. I did have one friend that cared tho, and he helped me get back on my feet. Mow I'm a straight A student, and getting better. If you ever want to talk, leave me a message at my advice colum.
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I tried to kill myself. Twice. I tried hanging myself and slitting my wrists. Obviously both didnt work. Kinda made me think though. Maybe I have a purpose here. I mean think about it, isnt there anything you want to do? Like from when your little? I always wanted to by an adolescent phychologist. But anyways, you dont have long left at school. (that actually depends where you live... but where i live it would be your last year)you will hate yourself even more if you screw up your life because of depression. I had it, i still have it. everyone clasifies me as a goth cus im always angry and depressed (the consistant wearing of black, excessive amounts of eyeliner and black hair doesnt help - LOL) basically though, your grandmother is worried about you. you probably really scared her and shes trying to guilt you into not doing it. If you need someone to talk to, im here for you. I think i understand, i cant say completely but ive been through a lot. No one will understand unless you let someone in. I l;earned that the hard way. Best of luck. XXXX
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It sounds to me as if you are depressed. Remember, depression can be brought on by little events or big events, but they pretty much ALL seem to be life changingly BAD. My suggestion would be to sit down with someone you really trust, and talk to them about it as objectively as possible. Tell them that you feel like the world is closing in on you and you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. Tell them you remember a time when things didn't seem this dark, and you want help. Medication will probably help you if it is an option for you. In any case, spend time outside, even if it's not DOING anything. Do your homework out there, sunbathe, walk the dog. Sunlight tends to alleviate some of the lesser symptoms of depression. Good luck, honey, and remember, life's not truly as bad as it seems at this moment!
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I was the short chubby kid with acne.
I didn't have much friends; no one understood me.
I hated my school and my teachers.
My parents didn't want me - they left me @ my aunts home 9 months out of the year.
Girls wouldn't talk to me; they thought / everyone thought I was weird.
The jocks, the preppies, the "wanna be" gansters all picked on me.
Life seemed dreadful; everyday was long and grey.
There was never anything to look forward too.
I always loooked forward to the end of the school day, and then what? I dreaded even going home... I loooked forward to when my aunt was sleeping; when everyone was sleeping; when the whole world was sleeping, so I could be alone. I'd lay my head out the window from where I layed on my bed and gaze up at the infinte sky and ask why am I here. It was peaceful. I knew I wasn't normal - I wasn't like anyone else... I didn't even fit in any groups.
I wanted to sleep forever.
Either that or I wanted the world around me to never wake up.
I had all this negative energy - always asking myself why, and how, and how come. I decided since I had all this energy -- I'll put it towards something else besides the negative. I started working - making money -- working anytime I could after school.
My problems started to not seem so important anymore - they semed to fix themselves and I had money -- lots of money.
Years after graduating High school - I'm driving in downtown Chicago, and to my right I see someone I used to know - he was one of the jocks that used to pick on me. He was short, balding, and was working at a pawn shop. I pulled over and waved him over... he hardly recognized me - I was 5' 11" now, no acne anymore, people said I was handsome, I had a girl, I have a successful career - quite the opposite of what I used to think of myself back in high school. The jock felt small - I let it be and drove off.
My point here is Everything you do consists of energy. Energy that needs to be managed and leashed out in the proper places. My tic ( negative ) was always thinking and asking myself "why? why me? how come?" My tac ( good ) keeping myself occupied; working. It worked for me - I stopped being so self- righteous, accepted myself as I am; I matured.
Whats your tic - tac?
We all know what your tic is
finding your tac is up to you.
Find yourself something to occupy yur time.
Roll with the punches.
Accept yourself - love yourself.
Everything'll fall into place.
Life is an adventure man
live it and love it
love yourself
you're unique
i'm unique
have fun n meet new people
do something new and diffrent.
sky's the limit.
Soar to the Sky little Byrd and rest your eyes upon something tantalizing... then go get it.
~Infamous Trump~
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i kind of know what your feeling but its never gone to the extent that its gone to with you. i really dont know what to say but stick it out and try to be strong. prove your grandmother wrong. i bet anything your not lazy.. put your mind to making everything better.. one thing at a time.. i hope i helped even if it was just a little.
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Hey,
first let me start of by saying killing yourself is not the answer to any of your problems you just need to find something that you love and nobody i mean nobody can take away from you what is it that you like to do you dont have to be good at it but it makes you happy. now having low self esteem yeah its tough but at the same time its easy. you got to relaize you are beautiful no matter what anybody says its whats on the inside not the outside that people are going to love and if you dont believe that then look beautiful how? you might say..... i know youve heard about proactive try this it actually does work my cousin she hadd really badd acne and she used it and it cleared right up. then get some clothes that look hott and sexy gives helps your figure look as beautiful as it truely is then get your makeup and your hair and your beautiful and even if nobody pays you attention or dont give you the time a day fuc them you dont need them anyway. you should always feel strong and independent always feel beautiful because if you feel beautiful then you look beautiful and viceversa. and your teachers who likes school anyway nobody unless your a nerd lol! but what you need to do is do whatever it is they tell you to do even if it stupid and has no point at all do there work because a soon as you pass there class you are gone out dont need to see there ugly faces no more at all see you later okay. there there to help you and if they dont then fuc them to you know i mean as long as you try and put fourth the effort that you should then you keep on steppin because you did at least try. and your counselor dont worry about her let her do what she do and dont worry about them. your grandmother doesnt know about what she talking about dont worry about her she just doesnt know what a great person you truely are and she just needs to reconigze that what shes doing is hurting you and hurting your relationship towards each other. Also find someone that you are close with or that you know will listen to you like me or some one in your community or other people on advicenators that you feel will help you in what your going thru and also loves you for you thats the most important thing. you are special and if you leave this world right now a lot of people will miss you even your grandmother cause she does love you she just has a very hard way in showing it believe it or not it is true. hope i help and if you ever need someone to talk to i am here
-attractive
&hearts
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Suicide is never the answer. They people you leave behind are left feeling gulity and confused. Almost everyone has heard the saying "It's a permanent solution to a temporary problem"...but there are times when you feel so lost that your problems seem permanent. I've been there...There were days that I would not say anything to anyone at school...even though I stayed after for musical practice everyday...when I wasn't needed on stage I would sit in the back of the auditorium and dwell on how unhappy I was. I couldn't go a day without thoughts of suicide..I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep...Then one night I decided to attempt suicide...I overdosed and ended up really sick...but still alive. Only a few people know about it...and those people have told me that they could not live without me. Ever since then I have been thankful that I am still alive. I have "episodes" so to speak every once in awhile..I just take things one day at a time. Your grandma is just old and stressed...Old people can be very dramatic.
Don't quit school...high school won't last forever...and don't believe it when adults tell you crap like "These are the best years of your life" Everyone is different and everyone takes high school differently. In a few years it will be over with and you can move on with your life...If you go to college you will meet new people who will hopefully be more grown up and tease you about your acne..[and who knows it might be gone by then] and will like you for who you are.
I'm always avaiable to talk to. My AIM sn is Pvbandfreak..Don't be nervous if you want to IM me just tell me who you are and I'll listen to anything you have to say. Or you can always email me at pvbandfreak@yahoo.com
Love
Kate
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i defintley know how your feeling, you try and try so much but nothing works, so after a while you lose hope and you think whats the point of trying if all your going to do is fail? i know that this may seem hard now and im sure it is, i have many hardships in my life similar to yours but maybe it would help if you told someone or talked to a therapist of some sort. i dont rely on anyone, so i have kept all of my feelings hidden for a long amount of time and i have wasted so many tears on things that are not important and such. im only lecturing you because i feel as though you should try to turn your life around, when other people never got the change. if you need anything aim me [caseyyx143] i feel similar to you, so maybe we can relate .. i hope i helped somehow?
<333
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