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i dont know what this goes under. but me and my bf have been sexually active. there was a point when we thought i was pregnant. we were relieved when we found out i wasnt. but ive been babysitting a newborn baby. adn she is just so cute. i babysit her for hours 5 nights a week. he helps me. adn he does a great job. we both want a baby now. but were in high school. juniors. how can we get over this. i mean wanting a baby. ill rate high. plez help
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i think this is an awesoem question and i hope you like my answer. having a baby is supposed to be the most wonderful thing in the world. but idk i have never had a child. i think that you should only have a baby with someone that yoou really love and that you want to spend the rest of your life with. But i think that having a baby in high school is not the best thing. but it dose have its good points such as you probably be closer with your child because you are closewr to their age. kind of like me and my mom. im 13 and she is 29. so we are really close. but having a kid in high school does haves its cons. like you have to get a high school degree to support a child. i would also suggest a college degree but if you get a good paying job you will probably fine.you dont want to have a baby to soon because you wont be able to support him/her.money wise. you need diapers and food thousands of dollars worth of stuff. to get over wanting a baby. i dont know. when your babysitting kepp telling your self when you get that loving feeling that you know you want a child all of the reasons that you cant have a baby now. that your still just kids yourself. i hoped i helped! sorry it was so long! -Tay
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well i think you know, you prolly couldent support a child right now.but what kept me from wanting to have a child when i was younger, were my girlfriends labor horror stories.theres quite a lot of gory and quite painful details, even if you get drugs. one friend even after being cut to make her bigger, was still ripped from front to back. i think you and your boyfriend should try and search the web, or planned parenthood may be able to point you to a taping of an actual childbirth.also, even tho it doesent happen often these days, you could die giving birth. not to scare you away forever, but maybe just for a bit.you guys both clearly love kids so maybe you could consider volunteering together with children locally to allow you to enjoy children without the responsibility of caring for them the rest of your life. good luck
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Having a baby is a huge responsibility. Consider the following:
1) Earning minimum wage or slightly above minimum wage won't support two individuals, let alone two individuals and a baby.
2) A baby requires constant attention. Be prepared for countless sleepless nights and plenty of stress.
3) Parenting requires emotional and psychological maturity and fortitude. You will need to be able to deal with crises and deal with them effectively.
4) Children are NOT pets that you can get rid of if you tire of them. You can give them up for adoption, but it will KILL you emotionally later on in life. You will forever be thinking about the son/daughter you so haphazardly conceived and let go.
5) When your boyfriend finally gets a whiff of reality and the sheer amount of work that goes into raising a child, he'll probably bolt on you, leaving you a single mother.
6) If you are unable to care for the child, the responsibility will fall onto your parents, which is patently unfair, especially if they are of modest means. How can you feed four mouths when the most you can accomplish is three?
7) A baby will spell an end to your academic life for the time being and with it, any future prospects you may have in mind. Unless you fancy working 60 hour weeks at the local "super mart" to feed and clothe Junior, you'd want to reconsider giving birth at this juncture.
8) If your parents refuse to support you and your baby, you will have to find your own way in this world. No, it won't be easy. In fact, it'll probably be extremely difficult. And harsh. EXTREMELY harsh.
9) Without proper support during his or her formative years, your child may grow up to be a sullen individual who will resent you for the rest of your life for being so impulsive.
10) Point number nine contributes to the overall idea that *wilfully* having a child without the means to raise him or her well is just about the most selfish and irresponsible thing anybody can do.
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Take a child development class where they make you carry around a crying baby doll 24/7, and then see if you want a baby. If you still do, get help or something...just...whatever you do, don't have a kid now! Please wait until you have more of an education and stable jobs... not to mention you don't KNOW that you'll be with this guy for the next 18 years (even if you feel 100% sure, nothing is ever for sure). Wait another 5 years at least, please, if not for yourselves, then for the potential child. You could give it a much better life later on.
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well to be honest. 5 hours is nothing. I mean you having a kid your stuck with it everyday, every hour. you wont be able to go to school if you get pregnant.. some people are cruel. Finish highschool, go to college. Get married THEN have a kid. What if you and your boyfriend somehow dont work out? your stuck with this kid, cause its all fun and games, yeah its cute, and yeah its his and yours but come on, all it takes is for you two to be over and he wont want anything to do with you or vise versa. Plus i dunno about yours but my parents would TRIP OUT. wow i'd be in BIGGGG trouble. I want a family, i absolutely LOVE kids.. but im waiting.. its the smartest thing to do. Hopefully i've helped.
(:
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I dont know if you want to listen to a 14 year old but i do have some advice. You're a junior right? You still have to finish high school, go to college and grad school (if you choose) and i dont think that someone in your position would be able to handle everything. I mean you would also need a job to support the child and it will be very difficult to get through. I mean think about it. You're young, you have your whole life in front of you. I mean i know a bab is nice but dont waste the rest the rest of your school life for it. You really cant do anything without an education. Its like my mom is always telling me "Your priorities need to be set. School always comes first" Just hink about it alright?
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just realize that you want a good life for yourselves..and for the baby. having a baby now would be too difficult. decide that if you stay together until after school (hopefully college too) then you can get married and start a family. for now, babies are fun to be around when they are not always your responsibility.
i know it sounds bad, but think of it like a dog. you need money to be able to feed it (and for a baby a ton of other expenses), but although you will always love it, the fun only lasts so long.
it's normal to be wanting a baby. just think of it as something to look forward to in the far future.
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Just think of what it would cost you.
You would loose your freedom to just go out and be with friends. He would have to work full time, you'd have to pay bills.
I've done it and I don't recommend it to anyone. There is enough stress just being a teenager and going through all the changes from child to adult. Don't rush it.
That doesn't mean you can't enjoy babysitting together! I think that is great. Just be happy that you can come and go as you please (well, when its mom and dad get home) and don't have to worry about the expense right now. Save it until you are more able to give a baby a good life. :)
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