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How to not care about things other people say
I find myself caring way too much about what other people say, especially when it comes to my family. Last night I cried myself to sleep because two of them had said something nasty about my boyfriend -- which I should be used to, since they've loathed my boyfriend from the day I met him four years ago and they've made no secret of it. I really can't go on like this, getting upset every time they say something nasty to me (not just about my boyfriend, anything). What are little tricks you can play with yourself so you don't care quite so much about what other people say?
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When I get pissed I usually go against everyone head on. next time they say something mean confront them and show them your pissed. be like "what's your problem honestly" "what did he/or i do to you guys?" then if there still like that be like "you know what i don't even care what you guys think, I'll go out with who ever i want so get used to it" then go to your room and try not to cry. if you cant help it and you need to cry don't let them hear you, and talk to God remember he's the only one who understands you the most. keep telling your self you don't care what they think. eventually your family are going to see that their words don't effect you they'll decrease the mean remarks. remember it takes energy to be mean and nasty they have to except him eventually i mean if you've been together for that long I'm sure you love him which means he's not going any where.
hope things get better
syireen
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I don't think you stop yourself from caring but I think you should tell them how it makes you feel when they say these mean things. Teir your family and shouldn't say mean things like that about you or your boyfriend. good luck. Leave one in my inbox if you need anything from the advice chick
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1) understand their motives for saying what they do. If they're unreasonable, try to hang onto that fact. A lot of the time what people say about you has more to do with their problems than yours.
2) try to remember all the positive things people say to you. If you have trouble remmebering, keep a kind of diary of compliments and good times. You know how most people use diaries to vent and moan? Do the opposite. Really helps to look back at it.
3) don't rise to it and get upset in front of them. just humour them and let it wash over you. It can help to say something they really don't expect (if you're anything like me it'll make you laugh and feel all smug :)). e.g. if they accuse you of being selfish/stupid etc etc just agree and leave it at that. YOU don't have to believe it but it'll pull them up short coz where do you go from there really?
it's really hard but just try to make a real effort to like and believe in yourself. Make time to take care of yourself and just do things you want t do sometimes. It'll take time but you really can do it.
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List all the things you are good at. It will totally bring up your self esteem...hey maybe they are just jealous. :) if you ever need some self esteem boosting...just ask for my AIM sn and i will totally talk to you!
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think about the positives. if they say, for instance, your boyfriend is rude remind yourself that he is respectful towards you and is careful around them, and they are just being picky about your life. it isn't their business to make sure you know how they feel about him.
that's just an example but if you just think about the reasons why they are wrong and you'll be able to just shake it off like it's nothing.
trust me, it works.
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My parents are like that too. We have been together for 2 years and they do not accept that I love him and we want to be together. So when they start on one of their lecturing binges I just sit and pretend to listen but I just let it go in one ear and out the other. My parents also always are bugging me about grades and getting a job so when they start talking about that I find something else to think of in my head and just concentrate on that till they are done. Hope I helped!
Nikki
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my parents are somewhat the same way with my boyfriend. they don't like him because he's hurt me a few times.. you don't really need any tricks to not care as much. all you need to do is just ignore them - or just talk to them and tell them to stop saying stuff to you about him, because it really makes you upset. i stood up for myself and told my parents to stop saying things to me about him - and they did. hope i helped :o)
&l0ve; jamziix16
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