Im 98 pounds, but Im small, too. Im about 5'0. So thats normal right? But, I feel like I look overweight. Everyone in my school makes fun of me (in a nice way?) and is like "omg, you get everything because your a stick." or they'll be like "did you eat today?" I eat ALL the time. But I feel like I look fat. When I look in the mirror, I see a pudgy face, big stomach and huge thighs. I dont know WHAT to do. Ive never acted on it but today in math (I was bored, lol) I pushed my tongue to a point below my moler. It made me throw up a little but i swallow & no one noticed. Then, when I got home I did it again. Im afraid of it spiraling into something more serious what do i do!?
Behnnie answered Friday January 6 2006, 3:22 am: You are NOT "spiraling into an eating disorder" ;) And if you are, the info you've provided here certainly is not sufficient to determine that you are or that you need to seek therapy. Geez! What- are you 14? He he- it's called "puberty" and "growing up" and "the American female body issue." Welcome to the club, we're glad to see you :D
Oh brother: this answer could be 5,000 words and still not say what you need to read, so let's assume you've heard all the speeches on TV and in health class and from know-it-all friends and just boil it down to basics:
So you accidentally found a way to easily make yourself throw up. Does that mean you're going to start doing it intentionally after every meal? Heck no! For one thing, knowing HOW to do something doesn't mean you're going to go out and do it, let alone do it often enough to make it a habit. I bet most girls who've tried it once, or even a few times, swore off it because they just couldn't stand doing it! Besides which, anorexia and bulimia are the two worst ways to lose weight. The pounds come off, but so does the health. How many anorexic or bulimic actresses have you seen look positively atrocious before finally admitting they have an eating disorder and putting the weight back on? Probably quite a few, eh? And it really isn't a pretty look. Even they admit it.
And another thing that seems to be getting overlooked for the sake of jumping to the conclusion that this is an eating disorder (which is so much more exciting to talk about so naturally it must be the case, right?), is that it's not uncommon for women of all shapes, ages, races, sizes, etc. to take issue with the way they look when hordes of other women would LOVE to have that same body. So you don't like a part or two? You don't have to! You do not have to be in love with the beauty and splendor of every last little tiny piece of yourself!
So long as those crazy eyes of yours don't lie to you so loudly that you end up causing yourself harm (and so long as you don't let other people's jabs at you about your size overcome you), don't let yourself feel too threatened by thoughts of "Holy crap- I look huge!!" Now, I'm not saying that's a great way to think, or that it's okay to rail on yourself about your looks or your body. Not at all. What I AM saying is that not being a huge fan of certain parts of your body does NOT mean you have an eating disorder and does NOT mean you're doomed to have one and does NOT mean you're neurotic and does NOT mean you need to take a month off school to attend a psycho-therapy retreat in the mountains. Unless they offer horseback riding, a spa, and a personal shopper.
Take a few steps away from that mirror young lady. Spend a little less time scrutinizing your body inch by inch, realize that in youth we do tend to have some softer spots that are just part of being human, and know that no matter what you look like: if you spend enough time focused on yourself and your body and what you think about every last detail, you're guaranteed to be able to find at least something you don't like.
Cut your losses, eat healthily, stay physically active, crop your mirror time in half, and only pay attention to 20% of what is said by people who feel it's there business to tell you what you look like or to ask you what you're eating. That 20% will still be tired and old and a little annoying, but it might be good for a chuckle when you're downing the next fruit smoothie after a jog with a friend.
DancinCutie08 answered Thursday January 5 2006, 7:44 pm: i think your weight is perfect.. i only read the first line but i thought thats all i need. accually you could prob gain some pounds.. im just under 5'1 and im a 115 pounds and people still comment on how small i am. granted i think that i am a few years older that you but your at a fine weight. and dont throw up you have no need to! your perfect and im sure of it! [ DancinCutie08's advice column | Ask DancinCutie08 A Question ]
extton answered Thursday January 5 2006, 3:44 pm: You need to talk to a counselor or a psychologist. At very least, talk to your parents. You can get through this, but you may not be able to do it alone - it's best to get some help as soon as possible. [ extton's advice column | Ask extton A Question ]
Check that out. According to this you are underweight by a few pounds. You need to stay as you are, or even gain some weight or else you'll end up so skinny it's unhealthy. [ sillyrob's advice column | Ask sillyrob A Question ]
Lady_XX_Love answered Wednesday January 4 2006, 11:18 pm: For some strange reason the "pushing your tongue to a point below your moler" sounds gross and funny at the same time but it's bad so don't do it. You're not fat so somehow tell yourself your not. You are normal weight. I think I am fat but like you my peers seem to think otherwise. I am 5'2 and I weigh 105 lbs. Typical teen weight. People are telling you that you look great and you should take that as a compliment.
metal_cheerleader_x answered Wednesday January 4 2006, 11:10 pm: Just stop pushing your toungue in the back of your mouth ??? .. I mean ... People are just making fun of you because they want to be skinny like you .. im 5'4 and i weigh 110 .. and i know im skinny but sometimes i still think i should weigh less i think is perfectly normal
LadyGoodman answered Wednesday January 4 2006, 11:06 pm: For the love of god don't do it anymore! And try to convince yourself that you're not overweight. Do whatever you have to do to make yourself believe that, even if it means secretly comparing yourself to fat girls and acknowledging that they are actually the ones who are overweight. I know that sounds AWFUL but anything is better than being bulimic or having some type of eating disorder. [ LadyGoodman's advice column | Ask LadyGoodman A Question ]
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