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How do I find out how he feels?
Theres this boy I've known like 6 years.. me and him just started messin around and he knows I care deeply for him ... aka like him. I love him.. but he doesnt know it, i guess. But we just had sex, and I sleep over his house sometimes and we cuddle kiss... and he kisses my forehead and tells me 'Goodnight beautiful' .. but when everyone else is around hes rude to me and he ignores me. He doesnt call me anymore, he doesnt even IM me much. But his friends all tell me he likes me, and right now I'm trying to ask him how he feels - and he wont friggen answer me! I'm 17 years old, I know I can find someone older than me that wont play games (hes only 15).. but I cant help the way I feel about him.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
You probably already know this, but boys mature more slowly than girls. That's not an absolutely ironclad rule - there are certainly some mature boys and some immature girls - but generally, girls mature earlier, at least mentally.
So you're basically working against biology. Because not only is he a boy, and physically two years younger than you are, but *mentally* he's almost certainly younger still, compared to you.
I don't know what he was arrested for, but that does seem to indicate that he's still got a lot of growing up to do. You still have some growing to do yourself, but you're MUCH closer to adulthood than he is.
This is a tough situation. Particularly because it sounds as if you love him.
But I'm still going to have to say that first off, you really need to wait until he's older before you have sex with him again. He's almost certainly not ready, and I think that's contributing to the immaturity he's been showing you.
Not to mention that legally, you could be charged with statutory rape. Which is REALLY something you want to avoid; you could end up being publicly listed as a sexual predator for *life*. Women aren't charged as often as men, but it DOES happen. You don't want that.
It's going to be hard for you, but I think you need to change from being his girlfriend, to being his *friend* - for now. You can talk to him about this, if you think that wouldn't hurt your relationship; of course most boys aren't as good at talking about relationships and feelings as girls are, so that might be a frustrating experience for you. But it would probably be a good idea, just so he knows where you stand with him.
He may challenge you on that. He may demand sex, or no relationship at all. I understand how incredibly hard that will be for you, because he means so much to you. But for his own sake, you need to be the more mature one, and take control of the relationship. That's the only way I see any chance for you two to end up together in the end.
If that's what you want. I think that it is, but I could be wrong. That's probably something you should think about: do you want to be with him for the long term? Can you wait until he's old enough for a relationship to work? Can HE wait that long? Will he?
Does he want to?
The answers to those questions should help you to figure out where you want to go from here. Good luck.
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i deffinetly kno wut your talking about. i have the same problem (except we didnt have sex) he shows affection when ur all alone and then ignores you when hes w/his friends...
hmm i dont even kno wut 2 do ... i think i need the same advice haha...but ill try to help you out
well, first of all, hes gotten arrested. not good. hes a jerk to you in front of his friends. also not good...but on the other hand, when your alone, hes awesome and you love him...
ok im just telling you what you already kno
i would confront him about this...stop doing sexual things with him. and kind of avoid him...if he IMs you...talk 2 him...if he calls you, talk 2 him....but dont IM him, call him or ne thing...kinda play hard to get. and see if he still needs u...if he doesnt call you or ne thing...move on because you can obviously find someone better than him. but if he calls you or tries 2 talk 2 u...deffinetly talk to him and tell him ur feelings. if he really loves you, he'll understand and he will change for you
hope i helped...need anything else, leave it in the inbox <3
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Oh geez. I'm thirteen so I don't know if I can help you that much. I'll try. Ok well first of all I personally think you shouldn't be having sex. You're too young and not married....yeah, I know, I sound like your mother. Putting that aside, if he treats you like crap when he's not sleeping with you....maybe he only wants your body. Just a thought. Hope I helped!!
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It seems obvious by his behavior that he doesn't want anybody to know about your relationship. He is rude when others are around.
He is getting what he wants now and then and that is all he cares about. He is using you. He has been arrested. He is troubled and I don't think you need that in a boyfriend. If you want to stay friends that's okay, but, I think if you're expecting a big romance he isn't the guy for you.
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