|
A stupid promise?
13/f
Okay well there's this guy I really like and I want him to be my boyfriend but the thing is that one of my friends likes him a lot too. So when I told her I liked him she made me promise that I wouldn't go out with him. I think it's kinda stupid for her to make me promise that so I told her that if he asked me out I was gonna say yes. But then she got mad at me and I think she told him that I liked him because he has been avoiding me ever since. I wanna talk to him about it but I haven't gotten a hold of him lately. And since he's avoiding me we aren't really hanging out. I'm really sad since I've liked him on and off the whole year. And I'm kind of jealous of my friend cuz he's been flirting with her a whole lot. So what do I do? Do I talk to him or her. . .Or both of them? Was it wrong for me to not promise I wouldn't go out with this guy since my friend liked him too?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I think you both should have not even talked to him since you both like him. You made her a promise, and if that promise included her not dating him either, then that promise definetly should have been kept. A boy will come and go, friendships are there to stay, in other words, boys are not worth fighting over. Your friendship is much more important when you are thirteen. So, I think you need to get with your friend, and tell her that you're sorry. As for that guy, if you are both willing not to be around him, then it will work out better. You friend was pretty cold doing that to you, but you need to think twice before making a promise with your friend.
-TheTeenGirl
]
Well, I sincerely think you should just get over it. Why are you sacraficing friendships for meaningless pseudo-romantic relationships? You're 13, you have no place in a "love" relationship right now, you should stick to being friends with people and leave the romanticism for a time where you are old enough to understand it.
]
Yeah you are right, it is stupid that your friend made you promis that, what makes it ok for her to go out with him and not you. Honestly if she was your real friend she wouldnt have made you promis that in the first place, what makes it ok for her to go out with him and not you. I know one thing boys should never interfear with a friendship, i think you should talk to your friend, make sure it is calm, dont get defensive or start accusing her of anything... thats when the fights start, just know that no boy is worth a true friendship
P.S i think the only reason you shouldnt go out with him would be if your friend was going out with him before and HE broke up with HER... then you really need to give her time to heal if she is upset but other than that.... well u know
Hope it works out
~hannah~
]
let the guy choose. you cant force him and neither can she. who he chooses wins.
]
i think you should talk to both of them.. and i dont think a "friend" would make you promise NOT to go out wit a guy you like.but any how you need to talk to her and find out what she said if she wont tell you then you need to ask him and find out what she said it isnt a good idea to jump to conclusions without knowing the truth.. hope this helps.
*~Stephanie~*
]
i just think that you should have never promised her and i dont think that she should be mad at you just cause you like him, that just doesnt make sense......i also think that you should also talk to both of them and set things straight
luv suzanner
]
talk to both of them. && dont feel bad at all, if anyone is to feel bad its her. she has no right to make you promise that. i doubt she told him, you like him because maybe he liked you too? && so she would probably not tell him you liked him. Maybe she told a lie? I dont know. And I dont know why he is acting weird around you. but about your friend, talk to her && let her know what you feel about this. friends come before boyfriends.. so maybe you should try && get over him? or maybe she isnt such a true friend after all. =) hope i helped! ask me anything @ anytime.
♥ nicole
]
Ok hon, thats not what you call a 'friend'. Thats what you call a jealous-would-be-girlfriend. Im glad to here that you didnt give into her pressure and stood your ground. If he's avoiding you, then there may be a good chance that she told him something negative about you that wasnt neccesarily the truth. maybe you should try to talk to him about it, and clear up the subject. If he is simply avoiding you because he thinks your interested and doesnt want to be tied down, then the best thing you can do is forget about him and let him go. There are other fishes in the sea, right? In any case, i suggest you corner your friend and demand an explination. Who knows, maybe this guy isnt worth your friendship after all. Ask her how she would feel is he asked her out and she wasnt allowed to say yes? Explain to her that you care about her friendship, but not enough to deny what you truly feel for anyone else. who knows, maybe you might get her to see your side of the argument.
]
Well some friend. I don't think your friend told him anything about you liking him. Maybe, but maybe she told him some kind of lie.
Comfront her, it was bitchy to make you too fight over a guy like this. And why do YOU have to promise to not go out with him. Why not vice versa? These are some points you should bring up in your conversation. far is far, maybe you can make up some kind of deal. I would try to forget this guy all together, he's not helping your friend ship at all.
And well if it somes right down to it, she doesn't seen like a very good friend. So in the end talk to both of them. I would take to him first, just in case you and your friend get into a fight and she says some shit about you to him.
hope you figure things out.
~kooka
]
More Questions: |