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brother's rage or just puberty?
My brother is 12 years old. A couple years back, we would always get into fights and I would always yell at him back. He would just take it in, or cry. Lately, everytime we get into a fight..he get's VERY physical and will fight for whatever he says! He is very violent..(he will climb on you and jump and scratch the heck out of you)It's starting to scare me because I can't even yell over him anymore. He's only 12 and I think he needs anger management! My parents think it's my fault because I make him mad first..but the only reason I yell at him is to set him right. He is VERY out of control when he's mad and he cries ALOT. Please give advice.. i don't know how to take this anymore..(I would hit and scratch him back..but that would only make the problem worse and he would keep on persisting to claw me out)..I'm a 16\F by the way. Thanks..I rate
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I think that you should try to talk to him and see whats the matter. I mean something could be bothering him.
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Taniqua's-teen-advice
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Next time, don't yell at him. If he does begin to get violent, hug him and hold him there and tell him not to be violent because it scares you and you love him. But he can't do what he's doing. (For example hitting a cat) or something.
He just needs some love.
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I guess he's just decided he isn't going to take it anymore. You guys will have to find a better way to get your point across to each other. Instead of yelling try calmly discussing the problem. :)
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Well- you need to realize that you aren't his parent..so you don't really have the right to yell at him to 'set him straight'- you should still assist him when hes done something wrong but he wont respect you if you keep yelling at him
good luck-
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my 12 year old sister does the same...! except im 14/f and shes like 5 inches taller than me so she can hit and scratch hard. i think they just get to that stage where they wanna pick on you ( you know instead of the older hiting and scratching the younger kids) i think they just wanna get back at us! they r tired of the older siblings beating 'em up! i dont beat my sister up though. ill like bump her arm and she'll start yellin so i hit her to make her shut up and she'll dig her long nails into me! then ill pinch her and she'll slap me and i end up winning by not crying and running away. sure i walk away with a few cuts and bruises (exageration) but i won and they are just those kinds of minor things that heal in a few hours no big deal so any way i just think ur bro is goin through a stage... maybe not i dont know im not dr. phil or something. i hope my LONG kinda pointless adivce helped...
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Well, I'm not a guy so i wouldn't know, but through what I've learned I'd say he's going through a normal stage of puberty, but prolly a bit more than most boys. There is an age whenwjen they get violent and nasty and want to be physical, like a certain hormone. But I would keep telling my parents if it gets to be really bad. Maybe he's REALLY upset about something in his life, but really try to talk to your parents, and if they won't do anything maybe talk to a guidence counselor. hOPe I HeLpEd! Best of luck! :D
~*jemmy*~
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Hey!
I agree your brother is... wow. Your parents need to see his rage and you have every right to try and fix him. Tell him he needs to find the middle there is no reason for him to hold it all in, which may be why he is so angry now, and his fury. Try to get him help if your parents won't listen then try to talk to counslers ECT. Good Luck God bless
~*~Sour~*~
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I agree with you, your brother is out of control, and your parents should be paying REAL CLOSE attention to his behavior. But who knows why they are not, there could be hundreds of reasons. But lets work on knocking down those reasons. Here is my advice. Take the next week and be REAL nice to your brother, DO NOT get into an argument with him. If that means you have to avoid him all together, then do so. Work real hard at this. If he is out of control....he will have to find someone else to take out his frustrations and anger on. He may choose one or both of your parents. Then they won't be able to deny it any longer. If he chooses to pick on some on at school, then they will get a phone call from the school, and they won't be able to deny that any more. You just have to stay out of his way, and out if his line of fire, and let the rest just happen. Be careful, they may have to see this bad behavior for what it is,more than once, before they take furhter action.
BUt if staying out of his way works for you, then do it anyway, to protect yourself. And hope for the best. If they are decent people...they will have to take action. Or if he get in trouble at school, the BD of ED will force them to get help for your brother. I understand how they feel, no parent wants to face the fact that there may be a problem with one of their children, they take it personally, and think there must be something wrong with them or with their parenting. But your brother's problems could even be a "chemical imbalance". And medication may help. Well, as you can see, it will be along battle. You just have to get yourself out of the middle of it. I hope this works for you. Use your brain, I kow you can figure out how to stay out of his way, and not get him angry at you. Good luck.
Michele
No, please don't misunderstand me. You said that you think he has a problem with anger, that he needs anger management. And I think that you are in a position to make an intelligent conclusion in that area. So I believe you, and if it is true, he does need help. ANger Management. And the best way to get him in to Anger Management is for your parents to be on the SAME PAGE as you are. They have to see his behavior the same way you do. They have to OWN the belief that he needs ANGER MANAGEMENT. Right now, you are the only one who thinks so. So if you take yourself out of the middle, so that they have to deal with his anger when he gets angry at them, then they will soon come to the same conclusion. As long as he is taking his anger out on you, then can chalk it up to sibling rivalry, because all brothers and sisters argue to some extent. But your descriptions sounds like it has gone beyond normal bickering between a brother and sister. GOod luck to you.
Michele
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okay... what it problemby is.. is maybe he is getting bullied at school and he can't take his emotions out at school so he takes them at home.. what you need to do is try and talk it out with him... you know what he is like so you need to figure out a way to get around the physical stuff... you need to be the bigger woman.. set him straight and if he doesn't like what you are doing try to avoid him ... if everything keep on getting out of hand you need to let your parents know that it is gone too far and soemthing has to be done about it ... hope i helped... !
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i would ignore it at first, but if that doesnt work, talk to your parents and dont stop until they realize that its really bothering you. :) good luck!
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