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To confront or not to confront....
Ok here it goes. Me and my bff have been bestfriends for a little over a year. Yes we have our fights and such but one of us apologizes and we get over it. Well the other day i was having a crappy day and kind of took it out on her because usually i can trust her to not take it to the extreme or freak out. Well later on i had realized what i did and apologized for it and she went off saying i take her for granted and im selfish and all these other things. Well we didnt talk for the rest of the day and for most of today. But then she randomly IMed me like nothing had happend and like she hadnt said anything. I read her online journal and she said that she wasnt going to apologize because she didnt do or say anything wrong. But i think she did. maybe not as much what she said but how she said it. I dont know if i should tell her how i feel and talk with her about it risking her getting mad about it. or should i just hold it in and forget about it?
please help
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whatever you do.. dont hold it in.. you need to tell her that you were just having a bad day and had to let some steam out.. i know i do this to my friends all the time.. but stuff just builds up inside you and you gotta let it out.. just tell her that your day was bad so you were just kind of in a bad mood. hope everything works out!
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I think you should talk about it. Holding it in won't make anything better. In fact, it will build up and then one day like explode, making the matter worse. Soo, talk to her! Good luck.
-Brianna
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If you hold it in and forget about it things could bubble up inside and cause a much larger row between you. In relationships it is much better to air your feelings. It seems as if she has some feelings to air herself.
I wouldn't do this over IM, writing or even the phone. I would speak to her face to face as this way things can't be taken so much the wrong way since you can see how the other person means what they say.
Do this in a peaceful place- not clustered and just try to talk it out. DON'T attack her as this will put her on the defensive. Ask her how she feels too. Tell her that you value your friendship and reinforce that you are sorry for how you acted before and say that you felt hurt by her words. Ask her why she said it? You may be offended but at least you can understand and work to make things better.
Don't leave it though; the chances are it will come up again if you do.
Good luck
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Just forget it. It isn't worth fighting over. :)
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It looks as if you were in the wrong. Just because you were having a crappy day doesn't give you the right to take it out on her. And by you saying <b>'usually I can trust her to not take it to the extreme or freak out'</b> goes to show that you probably have taken your frustration and anger out on her even before this incident. She was right to get upset at you, because you are taking her for granted. Instead of freaking out on her, you should talk to her and explain to her why you are in a bad mood, and let her be your shoulder to lean on. She doesn't owe you any kind of apology. In fact, you owe her <b>another</b> one. Friends are hard to come by, and when you find a good one, you should hold on to her as tight as possible.
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Ok, you need to talk with your friend. You also need to explain to her that people have bad days, also, when she as a bad day, act the same way. Hopefully she will understand why you are upset.
or
give her the silent treatment for one day, that usually gets friends to talk. Good Luck
hope i could help
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