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high school relationship advice please!
my boyfriend is pakistani and muslim. i am white and agnostic. i really care about him and he's head over heels for me but his parents wont let him do ANYTHING (were seniors in high school living w/our parents)with me (b/c of my race- wow im a victim of racism for the first time and it sucks!). he lies so much to see me but even then its not a lot. i see him at school and then occasionally after school while his parents are at work. we NEVER EVER go on real dates and it drives me nuts!!! i feel as if i deserve someone who can take me out and see me without lying or sneaking around. the situation just SUCKS. should i break up with him or just settle for seeing him barely ever? (if i broke up with him i'd still be friends with him)i really dont know what to do- i feel bad breaking it off but i'm unhappy in our current situation- its not fair to me.
message by x0x0rebeccax0x0
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I wouldn't necessarily call it off. Just say that you two should just be friends for now until some things get sorted out. He should understand if he really cares about you. In a relationship, you shouldn't sneak around but then again, its healthy,
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well sound like its not his fault its kind of his parents fault.....give him some time maybe he will tell his parents how he really feels if not i would let him down easily but still be friends.....if you do break up with him dont go out with someone else the next day or anything cause then hes going to be mad....
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If you really like him you should stay with him!! He is doing his best to try and see you! Don't blame it all on him, it's his parents that dont want you to see him, not him who doesn't want to see you.
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If your not happy then I say break up with him and make it clear to him that you care about him and love him but it just isnt working cuz of the situation, and if he cares about you as much as you say hell understand...let me know how it goes x0Sabina0x
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I had this situation with a mormon boy whos mother did not like me at all because I wasnt mormon. It really sucks but I figured out in the end that it is a lot less stressful to date someone that you are allowed to see. If it was meant to be you will find each other when you have control over your own lives but until then I would say dont deal with tha tmuch stress...espically since you will be graduating in a few months.
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Basically you're just friends now.I'm afraid that you're fighting a losing battle with this one.
Diffrent cultures have diffrent standards and I'm sure that his parents probably expect him to live by theirs.He may decide at some point that he doesn't want to live life as tradition calls for in his native country but until then you don't want him getting into trouble with his family. Just be friends for now. Make sure he understands your reasons.
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Well maybe you should tell him you's need to take a break while he figures out if he really wants to be with you by finding ways to make his parents let you's be together. If he is allowed to at a later date then good but if not its good that you's will be friends at least. Its better than nothing. But make sure u talk everything out with him. hope i helped. xo-ashley
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Have his parents ever met you? Maybe he could arrange for you to meet his parents, and have dinner or something, so they could get to know you and see how great you really are. It seems like you two really care about each other, to go to such lengths to be with each other. It would be a shame to let the relationship go because of something as stupid and ignorant as racism. Try talking to your boyfriend and ask him to talk to his parents. Or, write his parents a nicely written, thoughtful letter that explains how much their son means to you and how much you two love each other. That could be easier than facing them in person, and what parents could turn their backs on such a nice gesture. You two deserve to be able to be together, and have a real relationship. I don't suggest breaking up, nor do I think you should settle for how it is right now. Do something to change it, like one of the things I suggested above. Who your boyfriend dates is HIS decision, and not his parents. I understand that his parents may not totally approve of their son's choice of girlfriend, for whatever reason (race, religion, whatever...) but it is still their duty as parents to support him. Good luck with this, I really hope this works out for you two. Please keep me updated with how this turns out.
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