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My mother...
I haven't seen my mother for 9 years, I'm 14. She's been on methampthetamines my entire life. I just got word today of where she is, I talked to her about 3 years ago. I need to go see her so that I can get over the fact that she will never be my mom. I just need some advice on what to say to her, and I really want to tell her to stop doing methampthetamines. I know that I won't be able to help her, but I just need some advice on how to deal with the fact that I will never have her as my mom, and that I will never be able to help her. I know it's hard to answer, but please, if anyone can help me. The pressure is too much, I'm seeing her this weekend. Please help me. I have no one else to turn to.
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no matter what shes still your mom. youll love her for whatever she is right? hety you might be able to help her. maybe you can tell her how much you love her everyday. maybe that will make her realize that she shouldnt be on a drug when she has a kid who loves her so much. i really hope i helped!
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Ok, I can understand how not having your mom around would put a huge gap in your life. For that i'm sorry. I think that it was very responsible of you to except that she will never be your mother. Are you absolutly positive that you don't want her around, or that she'll leave again? Make sure, because this could be your only real chance to talk with her. I'm not trying to stress you out more though. Try to meet some place private so that you two can really talk. Explain to her calmly that she hasn't been a big part of your life, since she's been gone. Tell her exactly how you feel, but try to avoid blaming her, Phrase things to be 'I' Instead of 'You,' as in "I felt very badly these years." Instead of "You left me alone all these years!" It will make her listen more closley to what you have to say. She also might think that you want to patch things up, and she can be your mom again. So don't spend the whole day with her doing fun things, only to tell her at the end that she can't keep jumping in and out of your life. Get right to the point. Try to be alone with her, having your dad or something around is going to have you both harbor your feelings. Sorry. I hope I could help at least a little. Luck!!
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I always found that a letter is best for this type of thing, but if you're seeing her in person it will be more dificult for both of you.
Start by telling her that you've missed having you in her life, and that you're not nieve enough to believe that anything you do or say will have a strong enough effect on her to actually change her lifestyle, even though you wish she would - but you would appriciate it if when she is clean you could see her more and make her a small part of your life.
I have a cousin who has dug herself into a sitution similar as your mothers and she regrets it so much- she's always depressed about it when she's sober, so she stays out of it with drugs and alcohol... which of course is how she got into the situation... it's pretty awful and I feel bad for her and her children... I am truely sorry you are in such a situation and I hope it goes well for you this weekend. good luck.
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don't give us so easily. hey, maybe seeing what a nice young lady you've grown into could make her want to change. i honestly have never had to deal with anyone on meth, but it might work. i hope that she will be clean for the moment when she talks to you. go ahead and tell her that you want her to stop doing drugs, you'd like to know what it's like to have her as a mother. appeal to her heart, however diluted by drugs it may be. it may help, it may not. update me after you see her, my address is metalkat86@hotmail.com. i hope i helped, and i hope that you have as good a time as you can with her. later,
Kat
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I think you should tell her how you feel about her use of methampthetamines, but you should be rashional why you tell her. Use the time that you have w/ her this weekend to talk about your life what is new with you, how you feel about her being gone, and if you want to change your communication w/ her. They have alot of support gruops that you can go to and talk to people about situations that get to stressful to deal with. Try going to a YMCA near you they have alot of support groups and they really help. Good luck with visiting your mom and remember to be rashtional while talking to her.
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Tell her straight uo how you feel. Let her know how worried you are about her and you t hink she should get help. Dont attack her though be calm about it and what not but i think the only way you can try to help these emotions is to let her know EVERYTHING that you are feeling. I hoped i helped.. good luck and let me know how that goes.
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