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My boyfriend and I have been together for around 3 and a half months. I really like him and he says he feels the same but we never talk. He acts like all he cares about is seeing how far he can go with me. When we are not hugging or kissing, we just stand around not talking. We just never have anything to talk about. I don't want to break up with him because I really like him but our relationship is based on physical contact and no emotional support. So what should I do?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Everybody likes to be held and kissed - it makes us feel warm and loved. Just those things alone however cannot fulfill you for long. If you can't communicate and don't have anything in common which you can share, then things will just break down as you become frustrated by the lack of another element to your relationship. That is what is happening now. <p>
The obvious answer is to talk to your boyfriend. When it's got to this stage however, that can be hard as conversation feels and sounds forced and akward. The answer is to start small. When you greet him, don't kiss him immediately, say something small but relevant ("Urgh, I had the worst journey getting here. Sorry I'm late"/"Have you seen *mutual friend* today? I've been trying to get hold of him/her..." etc) which, though it's very small opens a chance to talk which you can get back to later.
Guys often shut down when they are bombarded with lots of talk in a row, so a big long talk about your day is a bad way to try and get him to open up - start small, mentioning things you know he's interested in - stuff in school, people you know, things he might have seen on television, things related to things you've done together on dates, etc. Get him actively involved, even if he doesn't talk a lot, rather than just talking at him at length or bombarding him with questions, as this sudden change will likely confuse him and make him defensive and unwilling to say a lot. The chances are, he's bothored by the lack of conversation too, but just isn't sure how to remedy it. Once you open up oppertunitys and show that you want to talk and that it can be fun, he'll relax into it and hopefully open up a lot. Good luck!
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Talk to him. He may just have a hard time w/communication skills or whatever
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Well, I guess it depends on how much it bothers you. If you are ok with it being purely physical, then just stay with him. If you want something more out of it, then you need to break up with him. It's not likely that it will ever change.
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I used to have this problem. Ok what you need to do is right before you and him get into it, juss bak away and strike up a convo! It works everytime! Just ask random stuff about his life. THis way it will get him off you for a while and you will get to kno more about him. Also just tell him taht you think you guys should take it slow and not rush into things. Tell him how you are feelin. If he likes you enuff he will respect this and tru his best to give you what you want.
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If thats not what you want in a relationship then talk to him about it. Being able to talk to your boyfriend is a MAJOR part in a relationship. Tell him that you think you guys should talk more. And if that gets you no where, then break it off and find someone better
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Try talking to him about it, and if things don't change, dump his butt! Lol. I know you like him, but believe me, once you break up with him, you'll feel a whole lot better! And don't worry, you'll find a better guy who thinks about more than how far he can go. Communication is everything. Trust me. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
~*Erin*~
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sounds to me like you two should end things and just stay cuddle buddies (friends with benefits,you kno hugging kissing,etc.)so you dont have to be serious with sumeone k?
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You know what the answer is. Physical contact is not a basis for a lasting relationship of any kind. Without communication you will be miserable very quickly and there will be nothing to keep him or you from straying. Dump him. Dump him. Dump him. You WILL find a better relationship. Luck and Love!
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