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regaining contact with a guy....
hey so i'm a freshman in college, and there's this guy here that i kinda like. but it's kinda complicated. i met him like the first day of school-he lives 2 floors above me. we went to a frat party with a bunch of people, and we hooked up. i haven't really talked to him ever since, and i feel bad about losing contact with him, as he was a really good friend. i would go up to his room just to chat (as i used to), but i feel that at this point it would be really random and awkward, because i haven't talked to him in like 2 months, and his roommate kind of creeps me out. he always seems like he's stoned, and we never have good conversations, which makes it even more awkward for me to go up there. any advice on how i could regain contact with him, without it seeming really weird and awkward? if you tell me to go up to his room, what should i say? i know this sounds immature and stuff, but this stuff never gets easier as you get older. sorry this is long, but any advice would be greatly appreciated-specially if i can fix it before winter break, which is in 2 weeks. thanks a lot!!!
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Here's a few questions:
Are you sure he doesn't have a girlfriend? In my experience, guys, especially the one's in college, could have a girlfriend at home, or even across town, that every girl in their dorm would mysteriously never know about. If you haven't talked to him in 2 months, then that means that you just met him at the beginning of the semester, had sex shortly after, and then you two sort of drifted apart soon after that. This scenario seems a bit familiar to pretty much every new collge girl. You meet this great guy, have sex, then never really hear from him again. It's possible that he had a girlfriend, and after sleeping with you, he got scared and had to stop being friends with you.
Of course that is only my first opinion on what you've told me. I don't have much hope for a decent guy out there.
But hey, it's always possible. It could very well be that he is just as confused about the situation as you are.
In that case, here's my advice:
He's two floors up from you, so you must see him around once in a while. Do you have any close friends on that floor? Do you have any classes with him, or any friends that have classes with him? When you see him around just stop and talk to him. Mention that it's weird that you haven't hung out in a while, and ask if he wants to hang out sometime. Find a way to see him, and if you see him, then just talk to him. His creepy roommate probalby won't be around all the time.
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If you hooked up, I think that the only thing it can be is weird and/or awkward. That's just something you'll have to get passed if you do, in fact, want to keep his friendship.
I don't see the problem with going up to his room and chatting, aside from the whole creepy roommate thing. You said it would be random and awkward? Well, if you haven't talked to him in awhile, any communication short of manipulating him into making the first contact, will be random. And as for awkward, like I said, you just grin and bear it through the awkward and it'll get better.
Perhaps instead of asking for advice online, you could be writing him a letter telling him how you have been thinking how empty your life has been these days without him. Don't say that, though... that's coming on a little too strong.
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get his e-mail and/or AIM screen name. they say the way to a guys heart is through is computer, so see if it works. it will be less awkward for you to go up and chat with him once you have been talking to him via e-mail or AIM. hope it helps!
-FunnyCide
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