ok i love my parents, both of them equally. but lately (past couple years) they have been fighting quite a bit...sometimes it gets physical on both parts. ive never really stepped in b4 ive usually kept to myself or expressed my feelings later when they were in a better mood. but just like a month ago while my family and i were on vacation and in the middle of the night they started yelling at each other! and u wanna know what it was about!? a friggin hat!! i guess my mom felt guilty for buying a 40$ shirt and w/ no reason got on my dads case about his 40$ hat. and my dad got "hurt" by it. it was pathetic at the most. so finally upset by the fact that they woke me up and we still had a full day ahead of ourselves and just cause i was tired of it all i got out of bed and barged in on them. my mom in tears yelled go back to bed but i yelled back no this is stupid u guys r fighting while we r on vacation. anyways i ended up mediating for them until 3 in the morning when things seemed to finally be settled and they thanked me and apologized profusly. anyways things were ok the next day until i duno all of a sudden they were yelling again in the middle of disneyland. my mom was crying nad they were both yelling and acting so childish. i was so embarrassed i just ran away from it hoping to reach a bathroom. my dad caught up w/ me and told me he was sorry and that "we would fix this" and i yelled at him a bit for how stupid it all was and he apologized and we went back to my mom and they both apologized then too and hte rest of the vacation was great. i love my parents they r awesome and since then everything has been great... nothing wrong. but now this morning!!! im not sure what started the fight because i was still sleeping until my dad started screaming. but it ended up being that they were fighting about who "broke the rule" first. i guess my mom slapped him aside the head to get him to calm don and my dad slapped her across the face and they are now currently as i type yelling about who started what. its soooo pathetic!! i just wanna walk in and thell them how friggin childish and immature they r!! but im not sure if i should... really it hurt when i had to mediate for 3 hours. i dont know what to do... they swore they would get counciling when i was helping them a month ago but nothing has happened of course. oh and my dad is bypolar and add. and my mom seems to expect to much w/ his condition....grrr
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Families? Derfel answered Friday July 2 2004, 7:40 pm: Hi, I appreciate the difficult situation your in. Personally, if it where my parents I'd go through them like a dose of salts, however you may be more tolerant then me. It dose seem as if you have the patience of a saint in fact. Wait until both parance are in a good mood and then sit down with them to hold a 'family meeting'. Explain to them how you feel and how unfair it is of them to put you in this situation. They need to understand that it is Absolutely not acseptable for them to just keep apologising and promising to sort it out and not doing so. Even show them your question and the responses, it may help them face facts. Then insist they make and keep councillors appointments. Therapy with a good councillor can do wonders, but it is a working progress - don't expect results instantly. Then - a hears the big one, tell them you can not cope with this, especially the violence and if it continues your going to talk with your school councillor or the child services. Yes it's a threat, but its one worth making, they've got to take this seriously. Next time theirs an argument and violence is used (even just slapping) call the police. You won't get into trouble and it may be the only way to get them to face their responcabilatys. Good luck & god bless darling, keep us informed!
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Derfel
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LilMia811 answered Friday July 2 2004, 7:13 pm: I think your parents should see a councelor, especially becuase sometimes the arguments lead to violence and one dau it could get out of hand. Also because your Dad had bipolar, your MOm just might piss him off on the wrong day, and he amy really hurt her. So counceling is very important. It seems like you said your parents argue over silly things so this is a problem that can be fixed if they can realize how stupid their fights are. Good Luck! :)
evilcutie4u27 answered Friday July 2 2004, 5:44 pm: I think that you should suggest a marriage counselor to your parents if it is that bad. I dont know what else to tell you. Maybe they should get a divorce if things don't get better. [ evilcutie4u27's advice column | Ask evilcutie4u27 A Question ]
ErIn answered Friday July 2 2004, 4:10 pm: Well for 1 thing being bi popar is not an easy thing to handle , I am so yes i would know . And your mom should know that jumping on your dads case for that hat was not nessacry .; With him being bi poolar little things will set him off , so if i where you i would talk to her alone and let her know that she needs to stop doing things to get on his case . Now as far as your dad goes he needs to just leave and go somewhere alone when he feel a heated arguement going on so that way nothing gets physical or worse cause one day he could her a little to hard and being bi polar , I know for a fact no matter how big or small he is he can really hurt her . SO sit them down and tell them they do need to argue over petty things and they also need to go to counseling if they can not fix thier issues on their own .
bballbrunette77 answered Friday July 2 2004, 4:01 pm: Talk to your parents and figure out the differences. Like how things were before they started fighting. And then how things are after they are fighting. Tell me how it works out! I hope I helped! [ bballbrunette77's advice column | Ask bballbrunette77 A Question ]
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