i have lived through just about anything you can imagine.. so let me help you out with ANY topic. nothing is too extreme! i'm 18 and majoring in psychology at college. i know this stuff.
Gender: Female
Location: Michigan
Occupation: student--->psychology major
Age: 18
Member Since: November 15, 2005
Answers: 37
Last Update: January 18, 2006
Visitors: 3738
Main Categories:
Love Life
General Sex Questions
Families
View All
|
| |
|
im looking for a song, or a quote. something like that.. about friendship, about how true friends can make it through anything.. about how best friends are the best thing that can happen. me and my friends have been through rough times and now that its over i know who my TRUE friends are. so, if you can think of something, or know something. can you answer this please? thank you. (link)
| |
"Friendship isn't a big thing, it's a million little things"
|
|
who are some of your favourite poets? (link)
| |
i'm not sure i have any certain favorite poet. i did enjoy much of shel silverstein's work and some ralph waldo emerson. i also like just going to stores such as barnes and noble and reading some newer pieces.
|
Hey. :]
Okay to start out with, I have this friend named Shannon. I wouldn't really consider her a friend, because in the past she's really pissed me off & she's just not someone whom I can relate to. But, I still hang out with her, I don't like getting on bad peoples' sides. I'm always so nice to her, but sometimes she'll take it over the edge and yell at me about something so ridiculous & I just snap, but that happens to everybody.
Well, basically today this kid named Gordon that we had just met yesterday went up to Shannon and started physically pushing her around, and stealing her backpack & "strangiling" her. In front of every body at school, he'd literally just throw her up against the wall & it really scared me. Yesterday when I first met him he kept touching me physically just like around my stomach & butt and I felt so uncomfortable. I told him that he should leave me alone because I hate whenever people do that crap. But he tried to do it again today!
I left Shannon while she was getting pushed around by Gordon, only because she was laughing about it, and I thought it was all a big joke. I came back like 5 minutes later and couldn't find Shannon anywhere! Or Gordon, so I started to get worried. I eventually found her 15 minutes later hanging out with some people that would like protect her from Gordon, and he left. She's never ever came to me for anything, or ever told me her feelings before. But, she seemed so worried about Gordon like touching her & stuff and started asking me, why I left her. & She was explaining all the things that had happened.
I'm really pissed now, because Gordons really made me mad. I've never seen Shannon so mentally disrupted in my entire life & she won't stop talking about it. Of course I care about her now because of all of this. Tomorrow I'm going to see Gordon & I just want to know what I should say. I don't want to be too mean but then I'm going to have my good guy friend there with me, so if anything goes wrong or if he starts touching us again he'll get his ass kicked.
Sorry it's so long. But I promise rating & feedback!! :) (link)
| |
you are both being sexually harrassed, which is a very big deal, especially in schools. don't take it. if you have told him to leave you alone, and he still refuses, it is an extremely big deal! you need to talk to your school counselor or principle about it. don't think you're being immature and "tattle-telling" in this case. he needs to realize that he can't treat women like that. good luck!
|
|
How old Should a child be when they start dating? (link)
|
i don't believe it is possible to point out an age for this. it is a matter of maturity, and the judgement of the parent. i'm making the assumption that you are a parent, so that's the viewpoint i will give the answer from. personally, i don't think there is a problem with going to a movie with someone around the junior high age, but i think the best way to go is to encourage group dating for as long as possible. explain that there is a lot of pressure involved with dating one on one, and a great base for any relationship is friendship. my best advice would be to not go on age, but rather, just by how well you know your child. from my experience, a parent should be like a friend in this situation. let your child know that they can talk to you about their crushes or who they're dating, rather than being embarrassed. this will keep you knowing what's going on, and them able to enjoy dating.
hope i helped!
|
|
what is the easiest was to get rid of my "love handles"? (link)
|
if you can, get some cheap, light hand weights. hold them and alternate dropping your hand about to your knee on each side. this will focus directly on the love handles!
:)
|
okayy i've had love handles since i was in 5th grade and now im in 8th and i can't stand them any longer! i hate seeing them hang over my jeans and then look at alll my friends that have their sides perfectly straight so i was wondering if anyone knew any way at all to get rid of them! Some people say side crunches but i don't know how to do those. So please either tell me how to do side crunches or tell me if theres any other way to get rid of them (i cant really run now cuz its cold and its snowing)
i rate high for anyone who gives me an answer !!!
thank you (link)
|
if you can, get some cheap, light hand weights. hold them and alternate dropping your hand about to your knee on each side. this will focus directly on the love handles!
:)
|
|
My friend always flirts with my boyfriend. They don't like each other that way, but they always play fight and stuff. When the 3 of us are together I feel left out... I know they're just friends, but I wish they'd stop flirting then. (I'm not the only one who considers it flirting, either.) I've told them it bothers me when they start playing around with each other but they act like I'm just being to sensitive or jealous. I don't know what to do. I'm so tired of them teasing each other saying things like wanting to see each other naked. It's not funny to me at all. I'm fed up with it. (link)
| |
that is SO wrong of your friend and boyfriend! especially to say stuff like the naked thing... as hard as it may be to admit are they doing stuff together? i would be cautious of it if i were you... maybe try mentioning to your friend that you don't like seeing her all over your boyfriend.. my guess is she doesn't have a boyfriend, so is there someone you could try doubling with to hook her up with? give her a different guy to flirt with and it may calm down.. good luck!!
|
ok sorry if this gets long. ok so theres this boy(chris) and we went out awile ago but we continued to mess around. i love him. and i told him this and he said we are to young to know what love is im 15 and hes 17. i know i love him. we dont mess around to much aymore b/c its hard to see each other b/c he moved about a hour and a half away. but we talk online once in awhile. well he was drunk one night and i wasnt online but he was talkin to one of my friends and told her he loves me and wants to be with me bt its hard b/c of the distance. and he also told her not to tell me b/c he doesnt want to get my hopes up b/c we cant be together b/c of the distance. but my friend ofcourse told me this. i want to talk to him about this but i dont know how to do it. if he wanted me to know he would tell me wouldnt he?and how do i talk to him about it b/c im not supposed to know?
ill rate 5's please help (link)
| |
he did tell your friend, so you knowing should be expected. keep in mind he was drunk... i've said a lot of things while i'm drunk. yes, most of the times the truth will come out when you're drinking b/c it's what you want to say but never have the guts to. chances are he really does love you, but is afraid of getting tied down too young. maybe just say your friend slipped and mentioned it to you, and you think that the two of you should start a loose relationship. tell him you want to talk more and see him whenever possible... when you can drive it will probably be easier to see him cause you could meet him halfway or something like that... good luck!!
|
ok. theres this guy that i like. his names ricky. and hes a major hottie. and i think he likes me but im not sure. ok. and he wants to hang this weekend. i dont know what were gonna do yet. but he was saying he wants to hook up with me. and i dont know if thats kissing or sex. but im not worried about that right now. ok. and like he seems like he likes me. but then sometimes he doesnt. like.....i dont know how to explain it. but anyways...like hes nice to me. and seems fun to hang with. and i like him alot!! and i really wanna hang out with him. and do a lil more. =] ha. but anyways....do u think he likes me or just wants to get some....? cause im a virgin. and he aint gonna get that. he might get kissing and maybe a lil more. but not that.
i'll rate high!!
(link)
| |
ok, my first advice is to be careful! most hot guys know they can get any girl so don't let him use you! if you wanna make out with him and such then go for it.. but only as far as you are comfortable with. if he says he just wants to "hook up" and nothing about being friends or hanging out i'd be a little cautious. good luck!
|
You're encouragement for my seemingly un-parent-like tactics and seeing them exactly as I intend to parent.
I've been there done that where the shoplifting teen is (when i was 11 and it was just a slap on the wrist--30 years ago!) I was honest about that and remembered quite poignantly that I was more worried about my friend who was caught with me. I knew it would be terribly difficult for my mother to leave her minimum wage job and walk (having polio and both feet deformed) the seven blocks from her job to where I was. I knew she would be disappointed, AND I knew she would still love me and forgive me. I made certain to tell my own daughter (remind her-I wll always remind her) that she can come to me about anything!
The main problem for me is trying to communicate with her dad. After I wrote my first "question" she called, as I had asked her to before she tried to go solo with her dad, and we talked for a long time.
I allowed her to debate my plans and the reasons behind them and was able to communicate, through love and genuine humanity--hoping to help her see the success in facing this head on with honesty and conviction. And an open mind.
She wasn't happy about some of the solutions and I did have to reprimand her for a disrespectful statement, but clarified I wasn't angry I simply wanted her to realize that telling me "I'll let you just do whatever you want. It doesn't matter" was devaluing herself. I also made it clear that she needs to hear me again, and told her "You are not 'letting me' do what I want. I've respected your input and addressed your concerned because that's my job. Don't forget my job is to look after and care for your physical, emotional, spiritual, creative, growth and all the ups and downs and ultimately her father and I will decide what's best for her.
It was a tear-filled, sigh of relief from which I heard her say thanks, mom. I reminded her it was her job to be the teenager and diligent student, she did nothing wrong...but, but, but...she just knows how her father is going to attack her and punish her.
I've been striving for close to 2 years to regain a united front as their parents and I have faith that although it ended, 20 years of communication and problem solving makes me confident that he will be up to the challenge and she will be more closely bonded in trust with each of us.
This has been my research for the past 26 hours (even while I was dreaming) and I treasure each moment I have time with the kids. I hope I can always remember that first and foremost I am their mother and that title covers a lot of ground. The underlying foundation of respect for your parents can only come from providing examples of consistency, open communication, free speech, choices and the hardest of all-the consequences.
I'm in great need of my ex's respect for me and the desire from him to match communication through long processes of where the kids are concerned.
Sorry so long. I'm a frustrated writer and I am so appreciative of this site (which I just found 1 hour before you repsonded to me) Excellent.
Perhaps you could tell me what I might contribute to the site--I already feel I owe for such excellent and easy service at the precise time it was needed. You were there! Thanks. Haze (link)
| |
i'm glad to hear things are working out for you. you don't owe the site anything, and you can always ask me something. for me, this is what i am called to do in life, so that's why i'm here. i'm majoring in psychology in college to hopefully do sociopsychology. my heart is for helping people, so i love to do this... ask any time! have a great day!
|
I share custody of our 15 year old daughter with my ex-husband of 20 years. She quickly became friends with a troubled girl who recently turned 16 and has a history of self-mutilation and now shoplifting.
How can I explain to my daughter that she is taking, unnecessarily, upon herself her friends punishment. The punishment was prosecution, court and fees and community service. The girl was also banned from the mall for 6 months.
She feels that if she tells her father that he will (being very strict) forbid her from hanging out with her best friend. She's afraid that if she's not "there for her" than she will do something bad or resort to hurting herself again.
The girl's mother and aunt are the adults in the home with her 10 year old brother and 2 younger cousins. My ex didn't like the situation from the beginning and questioned the environment the girl lives in as well as labeling her a bad influence.
I told my daughter after much discussion, deliberaton and a 24 hour delay, that It is the correct thing to do to talk to her dad. I told her that I wouldn't have a problem with her hanging out with her friend at school and school activities adn they could still attend Wed night church services they enjoy together. I also told her she wouldn't lose her own mall priviledges, although she would not be allowed to shop with Lisa for the 6 months she's banned and recommended that she speak to her school counselor and friends and me again before tomorrow.
She has waited patiently, missing many social activities with friends and being denied her autonomy--even being allowed to go to the mall without a parent--until the past year or so.
She's afraid she'll lose priviledges and her friend (whom she needs right now, too). She's living through the rubble of a divorce and a new step-mom and split custody and is an honor-student taking honors classes.
How can I help her to see that she will be guilty by association and defined by the people she chooses to befriend?
Many thanks for this site. I hope someone can advise me quickly.
Respectfully, Haze (link)
|
wow, that is a tough one, but i'll try. first of all, i think absolutely forbidding your daughter to associate with this girl will cause problems. she may resort to sneaking around and telling you lies, and that could break your relationship with her completely. i think your rules about letting her be friends with her in public settings and especially at church gatherings. i think she should not be allowed to shop with that girl. maybe try suggesting having some of her other friends over. good luck with this!!!
(btw, i think it's great to see a concerned parent who doesn't just yell at the child but actually try to find a good way to fix a problem)
|
okay. me and this boy named will, LOVE each other. we fight everyday but always say sorry. but today, one of his friends says love=trust. he asked me if i trusted him, i said yeah just not with heather (his ex girl friend for a YEAR AND A HALF) so that gives me a reason not to. but i trust him. then he was like then you dont love me, and i was like yes i do.. then he was like i love you so much but its going anywhere, we fight everyday. and then i was like yeah but you said we fight because we care and he was like well i was roung we fight because I care not you. then he said whatever forget you. thats where i started to cry! =( now me and him are in a HUGE fight over that. i really love him. but now i think its over with us. =( do you think it is? what should i do? should i still love him or let what we had go ?
=( i rate all 5's
xox- broken. (link)
| |
i totally understand you not wanting to trust him with his ex, but i do think it's important for you to learn to trust him. trust is the most important thing in a relationship, so if it's not there it just can't work. that being said, i don't think you should give up on him if you really do love him. decide if you truly love him or if you just don't want to go through the short time of pain from breaking up. go with your heart on it, and good luck!!
|
|
i'm 15 (sophomore) and my boyfriend is 17 (junior). we've been dating for around a year and four months. lately, i've been getting SO annoyed of him. everything he does just pisses me off now? i see him almost everyday, except the days he doesn't work. he always asks me questions... he always thinks i'm going to break up with him.. i don't know what to do.. but i need to figure it out soon. he told me he wants to buy me a promise ring and i think it kind of scared me. i don't know if it's time to take a break or call it quits. but i know if i do break it off, i'll regret it.. someone help me.. i rate high! (link)
| |
hey, i've been through pretty much the same thing before with a guy... if you think you can never like him as much as he likes you then it's only fair to break it off, but don't be too quick to do it. maybe try talking to him first about why he thinks you'd dump him. tell him he needs to just trust you and if he brings up the ring thing again just tell him you want to take it slow because you're so young. he should respect that. good luck!!
|
Hey Columnists,
OK, here's the deal. I am 13, and I am in 7th grade. My best friend,(9th grade) has been my best friend sence we were like 2 years old. When I was in about 2nd grade, my friend(4th grade), her brother(5th grade), played "Truth or Dare." What we did was dare each other to get naked, and then he would touch us. Well I have had a HUGE crush on him sence I was in 1st grade. This guy is in 10th grade, and on the computer he asked me if I wanted to play truth or dare with him again, but this time just me and him and i can't tell my friend. I said I don't know and signed off. I know that was him on his screename becuase he asked me in person, I pretened I did'nt here. I want to do it, but I can't let my friend know and thats very hard for me...becuase she is my BEST FREiND! Should I do it? or not? THANKS! (link)
| |
ok... he's in 10th grade and you're in 7th? that means you are 13 and he's probably 16... that isn't even legal! that's just desperate on his part. you should stick with a guy a little closer to your age and he shouldn't try using younger girls...
|
|
okay i like this guy and he has a girlfriend we talk every night & day and im pretty sure he likes me too. we kind of mess around all the time and i just want to know what i should do i mean i've told him im not going to mess around with him until he brakes up with his girlfriend and he said he would but he hasnt what should i do? (link)
| |
don't go there, girl!! there's nothing wrong with liking him, but don't even give it a chance to become more until he is totally single. you don't need that drama, and if he cheats on her with you then he's not worth your time cause he'd maybe do it to you sometime. tell him you like him a lot and want a chance with him, but it's not fair to you or his current girlfriend to be playin games.
|
|
Ok,well i used to live in this city,and now i live in a town.I've changed and i dont like it,im incecure,im quiet,im shy,everything like that.i used to be outgoing,eventful,and all sorts of things like that.So,how can i become more outgoing and happier?maybe like i used to be? i know whenever i go back to see my friends in the city im outgoing and fun with them..but i feel as though im so quiet here i'll never be outgoing ever again!!! please i need advice on how to stay outgoing,talk and yell out with out feeling embarissed of what i say! :(its either that or just move back to my city...oh yeah,13/f (link)
|
it's all about confidence... people like to be around girls who are confident and smiley, just be careful to not get snobby. you're probably like this because you just moved and it's new. go out and meet people, go say hi to someone, most people won't be rude enought to blow you off.. who knows, you might find a best friend that way!
good luck!
|
|
we are having this dance and i wanna go but i dont no how to dance can some1 please help me and give me tips ! the dance is tommrow so help!! (link)
| |
it's hard to tell someone how to dance in words... my suggestion is to practice. put in some music that you'd be dancing to, stand in front of a mirror, and dance. try to imitate what you've seen others do and just go with what looks and feels good. music videos are a little over the top, but you can watch those girls to get some ideas of how to move. be yourself and have fun!!
|
|
My best friend (A) might or at least I think is flirting with my Ex who I am still in love with. She knows I like him and she has a boyfriend that she likes to. But what got me mad was when I saw them play fighting. So I got mad and left and I 'sorta' got over it today until I saw her around him again play fighting and acting stupid. It broke my heart and I almost cried cause I he might like her!! What can I say to her. Thanks All 5's SWEAR! (link)
| |
did your best friend know this guy when he was with you? if so, maybe they're just friends... you should try talking to her about it. trying saying something like this...i've seen your around __ lately, anything up with that? don't say it in a mad tone or she won't tell you. then just try outdoing her maybe.. go flirt with your ex yourself if you still like him.. show him what he lost. good luck!!
|
hey everyone! does anyone noe a good way to stop split ends? i have a ceramic and it`s killer to my hair! i rate high! please help
[ &hearts:muah♥ ] (link)
| |
first go get a good hair cut! get at least a couple inches off to make sure all the split ends you have right now are gone. after that you need to deep condition your hair to keep the ends from splitting again. from my experience, paul mitchell brand of hair care works great for this and they have a few different types of deep conditioning. however, they are a little expensive. it sounds odd, but the other thing i use on my hair quite often comes from wal-mart. in the beauty section they have "hair masks" for a dollar or less. they really do work! i like to do these on my hair once a week, because they're cheap and they leave hair feeling very soft as well as keeping the ends from splitting! also, if you have a lot of money invest in an ion flat iron to use on your hair. it actually defrizzes your hair while you use it... the downside is they are usually around $80. good luck with the hair care!! :)
|
ok i have real bad acne. make up covers itbut i don`t want to wear make up. i want to noe that i can rely on myself not that make up, so how can i get rid of stubborn acne? the faster the better! please tell me something you KNOW will work -- frm experience please! i need it to be absoloutely workable. i rate high!
thanks
[♥] (link)
| |
i don't know how old you are, but i would have to say from experience that going on birth control helps a lot because it reduces the oils in your skin. if you're younger, talk to your mom about it and explain to her that you want to be more comfortable with your looks and to ask your doctor about it... i have seen it work for many girls. good luck!
|
|