Spurgirl14's advice column

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Q: There is this guy (let's call him Bob) and he's really really cute. I just met Bob a few months ago but he's very sweet and whenever I'm with him I get goosebumps and butterflies in my stomach (majorly) I don't know if I should go up to him and tell Bob I really like him or not. And he also dated one of my friends but they broke up, and I don't want her to be mad at me if I date him. What should I do?

I think you should totally go for it. Telling a guy you like him can be hard but it's usually worth it. You might want to ask your friend if she would be mad at you though because that's a touchy subject for us girls.

Q: I started dating this guy when I was fifteen who was eighteen. He and I were together for a year and two months....partially because I ran away with him for five of them. Well, this last December I had his child and my mom and I won't let him have any part of it. But since he was eighteen, I just want to make sure that in two years when I'm eighteen he can't try to fight for custody. Would he have any rights over my son?

The only way is if he gives up his parental rights...he might do this if he doesn't want to pay child support. But the father will always have rights over the child.

Q: Okay well last night I had my bf over and we got sexual.. Well to get to the point we wern't gonna have sex so we just fooled around.. Well he came(spelling error lol) and he was down there when he did it.. He made me go in the bathroom to check if ne got in but I dont know.. I dont know what to do. and I dont want to tell him I am scared. I am a 14/f

ok well you should be concerned because women can get pregnant even if the sperm just lands on their inner thigh. The best thing to do is not to freak out or panic because that just makes things more difficult. You should get a home pregnancy test just to be completely sure that everything is ok.

Q: hey im 16/f, and i ahve guys come up to me liek all the time and ask for liek advice and stuff ...and a few of the s guys i have liked.. how can can i become sum1 tehy liek instead of turning out to be..oh she is like my sis...or she is my best friend....i relaly want to find sum1 to do stuff with and just haev a good time ..and all my friends have boy friends and i feel left out liek all teh time because tehy have som1 and i dont. HELP
~aM

Guy friends asking for advice is not a bad thing. It shows that they trust you with their problems and that they feel comfortable enough with you to tell you anything. From personal experience it's better to be really good friends with a guy before going out. Do you happen to like any of these guy friends? I'm sure one of these guys likes you but is just to shy to say anything.

Q: is it bad to go out with some one if that some ones best friend likes you? Diane-age 13-female

No it's not bad. You can't help the way someone else feels. Maybe though you could try to be considerate of his feelings like not hanging all over your guy in front of him, etc.

Q: I was at my friend's house the other day and we decided to make him pass out. Then i wanted to try it just to see how it felt. So i hyper-venalated myself, held my breath, and let him pick me up with my arms crossed at my chest. Before i knew it i woke up and was on the floor. Everyone was staring at me and i didn't remember anything but it was really cool. I did it about 12 more times. Is there a health risk when you do this? Can it cause serious damage to your brain or anything??

Every time you hold your breath it kills brain cells.

Q: ok... my boyfriend and i really really like eachother... but online i don't no what to say to him... i want to make him laugh and he already knows my hobbies and i already no his... what are some FUNNY topics that will make him laugh... i'll rate 5's for everyone who answers i swear!

Talk about movies you've seen, maybe Old School or Anchorman.

Q: My friend is jealous of me and i didn't think it would be a problem like wahooo she's jealous of me doesn't make a difference. But then i told another one of my friend's that she was jealous of me and like would be at different moods like one day she be sooo nice and caring and loving adn the next day she would be like ignoring me hangiung around other people and like telling me stuff that really hurt me. My other friend said that it is jealously and that she is trying to get me mad at her and then she'll use that against me. I don't believe she'll do that but i jut don't understand her anymore. I feel she might be trying to replace me. I sometimes don't sleep or eat becuse i thinking about what lifew would be with out her and i miss her so much when i try and hang around different people or if i don't talk to her... i don't want to lose her but maybe it might be for the best if she is gonna be really mean and hurt me alot i really reeally don't want to do that. Help me what should i do...??

I know you care about her and sometimes people just do mean things to feel better about themselves, but you don't want someone in your life who is just going to constantly upset you on purpose. I had a best friend like that and I talked to her about how she would say mean things to me but in a joking way and she said she didn't know she was hurting my feelings. So you should talk it out with your friend and hope she changes but if nothing happens then maybe it's time to move on.

Q: (15/f)
I want to kiss my boyfriend but I'm really nervous so I want to start with a kiss on the cheek. What are somes tips? Like as far a lipgloss and such. And, What should I do? I know it's sounds stupid, but, I don't know how! What about afterwards? What if we both get embarassed?Please help in any way! No stupid or rude remarks please! I really need help.
*-That's Rachel-*

Well I would go with no lip gloss for a kiss on the cheek because it can get sticky and all that. A kiss on the cheek should lead to a kiss on the mouth right? Make sure you have fresh breath so chew gum or a mint. I know it's nerve wrecking but when the time is right you'll know, seriously and you just have to build up your nerve.

Q: ok so i have this girlfreind of mine and i really think shes weird and everything i mean its ridiculous(haha she actually has one of these advice columns...wat a loser) but yea i dont kno its just i really want to tell her how weird she is but i dont kno how without hurting her feelins.... i mean i love her more than anything and all but shes just so weird! she laughs so loud in school and every1 looks at her...i just really want her to kno how weird she is because it will be good for her and i just really need to get this off my chest. please give me some advice i will be so thankfull. thanks.

hmm well I'm surprised that you even have a girlfriend seeing as how rude you are. I'm sure your gf never makes fun of you or calls you names. So my advice is to get over yourself...I'm sure she loves herself just the way she is, which she should and hey who wants everyone to be normal?? Your gf sounds like a lot of fun.

Q: See theres this girl, say her name is Lucy, see Lucy stole my bf a about a 1/2 year ago, She treats him like crap, never talks to him and is always blowing him off. I still hang out with him all the time and he loves it, and i think hes falling in love with me agian, because hes always smiling at me and his eyes are always twinkleing and he calls me and hes always so happy to see me. hes always talking to his friends about me and how great i am and stuff (and i am not that great). and i dont know what to do, could i possibly be the bad one?

Make sure that you do really care about him because you don't want to lead him on to just get back at his gf. Ask him how he feels about you and how he feels about his gf. Ask him if he likes being with you more than being with his own gf. If the responses are good, then tell him how you feel.

Q: i like this guy im not to sure if he likes me. should i just let go of him or what? i have no idea what to do!!?

There's one way for sure to find out if he likes you....ask him. I know it sounds so hard to do but it really isn't. You just have to prepare yourself for either outcome. Remember everything happens for a reason. Ok so here's one way to do it. Go up to him after school or something and just be like "ok I don't know if you know this or not, but I like you" and then hopefully the response will be a good one. I've done this twice and I was really nervous but I was like if I don't find out if he likes me then I will regret it. Good luck!
~*Krystal*~

Q: I'm 13 and female. Ok, my best guy friend is startin to act all wierd. I mean, he used to be so nice and sweet to me and give me all sorts of advice on guys. That was before he got with his girlfriend. Then he got with is girlfriend and he was still just as sweet and kind, but then they broke up and now he's so different. It's hard to explain. He's not as sweet as he used to be and he doesn't give advice, he just says,"ur screwed then" and he's always talking to his ex-girlfriend. I don't mean to be jealous, but I do get jealous easily. He really has changed. I know he says I'm his best female friend, because he told me. I don't know how to ask him what's up with out sounding totally bitchy or jealous. Please help. I'm an advice comlumnist,too and I guess everyone needs help once in a while.

~K~

Make sure he knows that he can talk to you about anything even if you just have to say it bluntly "you know you can talk to me about anything." It seems as though something is troubling him if he changed so quickly. Just sit him down and tell him that he's been acting different and that it's starting to affect your friendship.
*~Krystal*~

Q: Hey, my dad past away May 2004. This past year has been the hardest year of my life. I'm worried about myself because i was a hard core christian before my dad died and now i feel like im loosing faith because im mad at God for taking my dad from me! In youth last wednesday, our minister said that god is there through all your problems, im just really confused because he is the reason i have this problem! I know God does everything for a reason but i still cant seem to forgive and i feel like im going far away from him when i need him the most! What can i do to get back my awesome relationship with God?

Thanx!!!

Well you're right because this is a time when you need Him the most. I know that you're angry at God for taking your dad and I know that it must be really hard to deal with this but you have to know in your heart that God didn't do this to hurt you. He needed your dad with Him and now your dad is in the best place imaginable. Please hold on to your faith and even when you feel yourself losing faith, always know that God loves you.

bio

Hey I'm Krystal and I'm a junior at Bowie High School. I really like music. I listen to rap and punk/rock and some country. Some of my favorite rappers are Snoop, Jay Z, Eminem, Twista, Chingy, and Ludacris. My favorite bands are Good Charlotte, Yellowcard, Something Corporate, The Starting Line, Finch, Incubus, Our Lady Peace, Green Day, Linkin Park, Greenwheel, New Found Glory, and Blink 182. Besides music I really love to dance, anything from ballet to hip-hop. My favorite sport is basketball. I love the Spurs and the Sixers oh and I loathe the Lakers!!