Gender: Male
Location: Currently in Sao Paulo, Brazil
Occupation: Graduate School/EFL Teacher
Age: 23
Member Since: May 20, 2012
Answers: 32
Last Update: July 5, 2013
Visitors: 4244
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what will happen if i eat my own poop cuz i really want to (link)
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You will gain magical powers.
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so im a freshman in high school.14/f. the high school and middle school are connected and most of my classes are in the opposite direction of my locker so i just cut through the middle school and it just so happens that i have a class in the middle school but obviously for freshman and up but thats just where the room is. and the teacher who's room it is i've had for 7th and 8th grade and he's a guy. he is just a dick. to make it short. he's pathetic and werid and and creepy i've always been a bitch to him becasue i hated him. but this year i really want to start off good and try to be nicer to people haha but yeah. and so he's werid like he's been doing this ever since i had him, for no reason he stands outside his class to just say hi to people. well i have to pass him like maybe 4x a day. so i just started being nice to him. but he's always been nice to me, but like in a creepy way. like he would only call me by my last name with Miss in front of it and call the other girls by their first. and im not even his student and he still does it. and he has stared at my butt and and body and like thats sooooo different if a like 30 something year old guy is creepily staring at you and not a tenager. but so i have it 1st period i have a class in his classroom but with a differnt teacher. but he still stays out side. so ANYWAY my friend gave me a peice of gum at the end of class, and i was waiting for my other friend so we could go to biology and we were the only two kids or girls in the room besides my hs teacher and the crepy teacher. so my middle school teacher goes, uhm you better spit that out. I said-nahh im ok, he’s like spit it out. and im like we can chew gum in the high school (which we can!) and so by this time my friend walks out i guess thinking i was right behind her. and i start to follow her out the door. and the teacher blocks the door with his body. it was only him in the room and my hs teacher who was on the computer so he didnt see. (thank god he was there....) i try to go around him he blocks me again. and im like fuckin 5 ft 1in or something and hes like really tall like more than average. so the second time i try to go around, i had my backpack on both shoulders and he pulls/drags me to the garabge can and makes me spit it out. it happened so fast, all i could think was wtf? you fucking werido get the fuck off dont touch me. but all i said was im going to be late for class but he didnt care. then i told my friends in biology and they said that its considered abuse. is that true? im just totally curious..i have no idea. thanks for the advice. (link)
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I wouldn't consider it abuse. He shouldn't have reacted in that way, but I don't think it's severe enough to justify an abuse allegation. I am much more concerned about his staring at your butt and body than by him making you spit out your gum.
Regardless, try to think about how you could have handled the situation differently. If a teacher asks you to do something, unless it goes against some fundamental value of yours, it's better to go along. If you won't go along with it, at least be respectful.
Saying something like, "nah I'm okay" when he asks you to spit out your gum is extremely disrespectful. While it doesn't justify him touching you, that disrespect probably made him feel very angry and also hurt his feelings. That ultimately contributed to how he reacted to the situation. Had you been more respectful, I'm virtually positive things would have gone differently.
Remember you said you were rude to him in the past. That makes him think he has to be extremely strict with you now. Show him you've changed, and he'll be more likely to give you some leeway. If you continue to be rude to him, you'll just get on his bad side and he'll go out of his way to punish you.
I would let the gum thing slide, but if he continues to stare at your body, I would let someone know. Just make absolutely sure that he's actually doing it. If you're not positive, you could ruin his career over a misunderstanding.
Good luck.
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14/f almost 15 but this guy who i've known since like elemtary school, beleive it or not i've never really talked to him maybe a sentence or two whatever but now we have like every class together and all of a sudden he just started talking to me and hes cute so we started talking and i like him AS A PERSON not the other way, at least not now. and now he'll keep trying to talk to me first, and he always stands in front of me of where im trying to walk in class and he knows that i hate that, or sometimes when im talking to my friends he'll just come over and like jump in and insult me, and my friend goes you can't just come over here and start insulting her it was pretty funny though. or especially he mocks me. im like your are so annoying but we were joking like that. and we were walking through the halls together and i would try to go in front of him and he would step in front of me, basically he just does things to annoy me! and i get really annoyed quickly. and sometimes when im sitting in class he sits diagonle behind me i can feel him staring at me and its kinda weird. i mean i like him as a guy friend but i get the feeling he likes me more than a friend. I feel like he’s always trying to make conversation/small talk but he ends getting nervous ( at least that’s what It looks like) and he just blurts out random things when im like ok?? Haha he’s always trying to get a rise out of me and make me laugh or get me annoyed at him and I don’t know why? Haha but im not sure if he likes me like that or just as a friend. Also whenever I feel him looking at me I look at him and ask him like what? Or what are you looking at? And he just smiles and goes back to his work, again to get a rise out of me. kinda confused what do you think? Or GUYSSS answer would you say that he likes me?? thankss (link)
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Yes.
That answers your question, but I get the impression that you want to know why. As you more or less predicted, he gets nervous. When people get nervous (especially people with few social skills, such as many 14/15 year-old boys) they tend to resort to sarcasm and mocking and petty things of that nature.
He wants your attention, and even if it's not the exact kind of attention he wants, it's better than you ignoring him.
You also didn't ask what to do, but I'll quickly go over that. It depends on what direction you want things to go. Do you want him to just stop, do you want to be friends (but nothing more), do you think you may be interested in him in the future.
If you want him to stop, just ignore him to the best of your ability. His intention is to get your attention. If he doesn't get it by acting like this, he'll try something else (which you may find more appropriate) or just give up.
If you just want to be friends, you can let it keep going on, but you need to make sure he understands that you aren't interested. You can just tell him flat out, or you can flirt with other guys in front of him to let him know you aren't focused on him.
If you might want a relationship with him in the future, make sure to let him know that how he's acting is a turnoff. Say something like, "I really hate immature guys" when he's around. Then, when he does stuff like that, say "wow, that's really immature". He'll eventually pick up on it, but you may have to repeat it a few times.
I hope this helps. Good luck.
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I'm 15, and I was wondering what kind of things boys like. Such as PDA and just talking. (link)
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That's a very tough question, I would just tell you what I like, but I'm not really your typical guy, and I'm also a bit older than the guys you're probably into, so let me try to mentally travel back to my late teens and give you some advice.
First, guys like it when you flirt with them. At your age, they're probably too shy to flirt back or even directly express interest in you. Honestly, flirting is just making more physical contact than you would with just a friend. Grab his arm when you're telling him something, give him a hug when you see him, and so on and so on..
Most guys like talking alright, but conversations can be a little weird at your age (something about underdeveloped social skills). If you're looking for something to do, as in a date idea, I would skip eating out. If you do decide to eat, get something to go and eat it in a park. The most awkward thing in the world is staring at someone across a small table while you can't think of something to talk about. Going for a walk, playing mini golf, or tossing a frisbee make much better dates in my opinion.
On the physical side, it's a little difficult because there is a large discrepancy between what guys think they want and what guys actually want. You are probably a little young for this, but I'm sure you've seen this scenario before in a movie or heard older people talking about it. A girl meets a guy in a bar, she goes home with him, and they have sex, and then he never calls her again. She cries and wonders what's wrong with her, etc.... The reality is that guys need that sexual tension. Once you've let it all hang out, the tension is gone and frequently, so is the interest. If you wait a while before having sex, you give him time to really fall for you, and then he's not going anywhere.
Different guys are different on PDA. Most guys are fine with holding hands, cuddling, hugging, quick kisses in public. This will all depend on exactly where you are and who you're with.
Most importantly, just be yourself. Dating isn't about figuring out how to change yourself so every guy will want to be with you. It's about finding the guy who loves spending time with you when you're just being yourself.
Good luck!
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I've been told im really cute and been compliented about it by parents friends and people from school.and whenever Im at a store or the mall i notice that alot of women look at me even the most prettiest ones that are there do it. And whenever i notice a beautiful girl looking at me i make a quick 2 second eye contact with her and automatically look away and try to avoid her unintentionally because i get really shy because of how darn hot they are .and i end up acting funny if she trys to hint hints to me that she's interested .what should I do
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I would recommend trying to just talk to more strangers in general. Once you get comfortable striking up conversations with someone you aren't physically attracted to, it becomes easier to talk to those girls that currently make you a little uneasy.
I actually use a similar system to your "2 second eye contact" method to metaphorically test the water before I talk to a girl. I try to hold eye contact for a second and then I smile. If she smiles back, all systems are go, we have an interested party. If she frowns or turns her back to you, abort mission. If she quickly looks away, well, there's a yellow light situation. She may or may not be interested. Try warming up on some green light cases first.
Probably a more important question to address is how to handle rejection. After all, that's what scares us. We're afraid of getting turned down and looking ridiculous and good lord almighty if there are other people present to witness the rejection we may just decide it's not worth the risk, so let me try and help you with how to handles rejection.
First off, don't come on too strong. She doesn't know why you're talking to her, so you don't have to immediately express your interest in her (although I recommend making that clear in the first few minutes to avoid confusion). Once you express that interest, if she rejects you, just tell her it was nice meeting her and you hope to see her around, or something similar. A lot of guys just don't know when to give up, and that just makes things so much worse as you are going to be rejected multiple times in a short time span.
Then there is the worst situation. Some girls are just rude. Talking to a stranger is not a crime, nor should it even be considered inappropriate as long as you aren't a six year-old talking to a man with a white van. Still, some girls will do everything possible to show that talking to them has greatly inconvenienced them in a way that sane people couldn't possibly understand. Some will just walk away without saying a word. Some will turn to their friends and say, "ugh, omygawd". I have even had a girl make a gagging noise once (funny thing is, I was going to ask to borrow her pen so I could fill out my luggage tag at the airport). These girls are actually my favorite, because there is a fantastic exit strategy: compliment them. Picture this scenario:
You see a group of girls at the park, and it looks like one of them is stealing glances in your direction. You decide to walk over and introduce yourself. After doing so, the girl turns to her friends, frowns, and shakes her head. You respond by saying, "sorry for bothering you, but I just wanted to say I really like your bracelet".
Regardless of your reasons for going over there, you've made her assumption that you were hitting on her seem false. You've made yourself look like a complete gentleman, and you've made her look like a real b----. You walk off with your dignity.
Most guys will insult the girl, something like, "well you're not that hot anyways". I like my method better.
Listening to some of those reactions, you might make the assumption that I have some kind of physical deformity, that my sheer presence is enough to empty a room of attractive women, but I promise I don't. Most of my exes are very attractive. My phone is full of numbers of girls I met all over town, and I too get compliments on a regular basis (although for some reason it's gay guys and teenage girls that seem most forthcoming with that information). Some girls/people are just bitter narcissistic people, and there isn't much you can do about it.
Lastly, change your attitude about meeting women. Instead of looking for the girl that will take you, look for the girl that meets YOUR standards. If a girl is rude, she's just one more that wouldn't have made the cut anyways.
I move a lot, so I have a lot of experience with meeting new people, but it's not really conducive to long term relationships (in case you're wondering why a guy who claims to have so much success hasn't settled down with one of these ladies).
Good luck and take care.
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Hi, 20/m
I'm a small town boy, soon to be moving to a big city. I'm trying to look for a room in an apartment, and have been looking on craigslist.
I've never done this sort of thing before, and so I'm a bit confused.
Some of the pictures look like they've been taken off a website i.e. they look like billionaire penthouses. Are these scams? Is there any damage in contacting them?
Also, any other tips you could give me when searching for a place on craigslist? I.e. what to look for, what to avoid, how to tell if its fake/a scam?
Any help is much appreciated!
Thanks (link)
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I've found apartments on craigslist before. It's not necessarily a scam. They hire professional photographers and interior designers to make the apartments look as nice as they can. I would be careful though.
Never give your credit card/bank information to them over the telephone. They may ask for your SSN as well to perform a credit check. None of this should be done over the phone.
Tell them you want a tour of the apartment, they should set up a time and date no questions ask. If they ask for any personal information beyond your name and contact information, hang up the phone.
Also ask them if they can give you the names of some residents that you can contact as references, or while you're looking at the apartment, try and stop a resident and ask them their opinion of the building. Try to do this when the person giving you the tour isn't right there so they don't feel pressured to be overly positive.
I would watch out for anything that seems too good to be true. After looking at a bunch of apartments, you should have a pretty good idea of what an apartment costs. If anything is significantly below that value, it's probably a scam.
I signed a lease at an apartment like that. The tour was great, I asked one resident and she said it was pretty good but that there was kind of a "bug problem". I imagined the odd cricket or roach getting in and signed the lease. The first night in I turned on my kitchen light and literally hundreds of roaches went scurrying into the corners. I was out of there by the end of the week. (I had to claim the apartment was unlivable and threaten legal action to get out of the contract, and I still lost my deposit.)
As long as you follow those steps: Don't give out information over the phone, request a tour, speak with a resident, and watch out for deals that are "too good to be true".
As a last bit of advice. Make sure when you do sign a contract and give them your information that you do so in their office. It should either be located in the apartment complex or separately if they manage a number of properties. Make sure it appears to be an actual management office (staff, file cabinets, break room, etc.) This sounds like common sense, and it's extremely rare that a scammer would go as far as to create a fake office, but it always pays to do your research.
Also, you can look up who the biggest realtors are in the city you're moving to and look at apartments directly through their site. Good luck, and don't stress out too much.
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Im 20.. 4 years ago i lost my best friend to suicide. I know my dad has been cheating on my mom. for years. Ive kept it to myself. we barely have a relationship me and my dad. i lost another friend 2 years ago, another one last year, and 2 this year. Im in college, i work a lot. I am just beyond stressed. I am trying hard to cope and keep it all together. No one, not my boyfriend, or my best friends, understand how i feel. I am so discouraged. i suffered severe depression for 2 years after my friend committed suicide. i still have depression for sure but i am not suicidal at all. My life is full of anxiety. I can't make a decision to save my life. I do very well in school. Im forming a lot of anger hate and resentment for all that has happened to me and for all that has happened to my friends that lost their lives and for those who are not understanding of how i feel. Im constantly trying to schedule something to look forward to so i keep happy. It's hard to stay truly happy. I am always getting yelled at for being so negative. I've tried hard to change how negative i sound because i know people don't like to be around debby downers.
Basically, I'm at a loss of where i should go at this point. I went to counseling every single year for a period of 2-3 months then leave and not wanna go back because it reminds me of bad stuff and prefer to work it out on my own. I was put on medication for depression but it made my anxiety attacks worse. What else can I do? (link)
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Hey, I definitely get where you're coming from. I think my first friend committed suicide when I was about your age. A few months later my neighbor, whom I babysat for as a teenager took his own life leaving a wife and two kids behind. A year after that my close friend killed herself. It was even worse because I new she was sad, but I was too caught up in my own life to pay it much attention. Recently, another friend decided to end her life as well. That makes four people in just over two years, so I understand loss.
I can relate to the depression and negativity. Sometimes it just consumes you. I don't think people understand sometimes. It's like living your life with a 50lb backpack strapped on; everything just seems so much harder.
I can certainly tell you not to do what I did. Especially after my close friend's suicide, my apartment turned into a minefield of overflowing ashtrays, empty liquor bottles, and discarded fast food wrappers. It allowed me to escape my problems for a time, but they didn't go away, and I just had that many more to face when I finally came around.
What has worked for me is extreme amounts of exercise. I started going into the gym about six months ago. I just took all that anxiety, fear, depression, and anger and tried to let it out on the treadmill or in the weight room. I also took up running and cycling. Sometimes I just strap on my shoes or grab my bike and take off. I just go until I'm too tired to care anymore. I crossed two Georgia counties (and half of a third) on my bike once before I finally reached that point where my mind decide to stop pestering me. Sometimes it helps me to think that I'm running away from everything, just leaving it all behind.
You'll find that a lot of your stress will just melt away after exercising, but I think you do need to put in a lot of time and effort to get to that point.
Other things that I find helpful are music, reading, and being outdoors. I generally have music playing regardless of what I'm doing. It helps me clear my head and focus on other things.
Reading relieves stress in a serious way. I think most people have stayed up too late watching television or Youtube videos at least a couple times, but very few people stay up reading. Why? Because it relaxes you. Find a good story and try to lose yourself in the problems of the protagonist rather than your own issues.
Going outside will also help, and you can combine this with exercise or reading (or listening to music for that matter) to further relieve stress. I think that being cooped up all day really adds to your stress, and getting outside for a while can help considerably.
Lastly, get involved in as much as you can. Sitting alone with your thoughts will drive you crazy, and getting out and working, volunteering, or studying will give you something else to focus on.
You will have to make your own decision as to how you want to deal with your friends. I would say to try and stay positive as much as you can. Your real friends will be there regardless, but staying optimistic with the people you don't know quite as well, you may just find yourself with more friends to talk to in the long run.
Any kind of life change will be difficult for you since you're depressed. The reality is that it will probably cause increased anxiety for the first week or so, as the depressed mind has a tendency to resist change with a ferocity unbeknownst to those lucky enough to lead happier lives. My promise to you is that if you stick with it for a couple of weeks, that initial anxiety will fade away, and you will feel better.
Don't hesitate to send me a message if you ever feel like you need to vent but have nobody to talk to. It's why I have the column.
Take care and good luck.
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i've gotten really into spirituality the past 4 years of my life and am really looking into getting dreads. i want them really badly and have for a while now but my mother is so against them. she keeps telling me that you can not get a job with dreads and that people will constantly judge me and i have to hang out with "a certain crowd of people". i do have really nice curls that i like, but i would love the chance to have dreads now before i am too old to experience them and change my mind.. does anyone have any experience on this? (link)
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This is a difficult situation. I always say be yourself, and if other people don't like it, they can keep it to themselves. Unfortunately, we don't live in a world entirely void of prejudice, so other people's actions have an uncanny way of affecting our lives.
It's true that most employers will judge you if you have dreads. You will most likely not be finding any high paying jobs while you have them. It's the same thing as with visible tattoos and piercings, people will make assumptions regardless of what the reality is. If employment is a serious concern right now, I would probably skip the dreads.
Also realize that it is very hard to impossible to brush dreads out. If you reach a point in which you decide you don't want the dreads, you will have to shave your head and deal with being bald for awhile.
Just because prejudice exists doesn't mean we should conform to it, but we also can't deny its existence. Do what you want to do, but be aware that it may come with unintended consequences.
Hope it works out for you.
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I have been a nurse for 30 years. Recently I encountered the co-workers from hell. I realized that the company had trouble keeping new nurses in this area, and I could see why..The two young nurses that primarily worked there, had an attitude that they were better than everyone else. I gently explained that in the nursing world I've seen this before, and if they ever want a day off, they need to think about the disparaging comments they make about all the "incompetent" nurses they've worked with, and help new nurses learn their job instead of spending their energy putting them down.
I let our corporate office know the problems with this worksite as I saw it. Well they didn't talk to me anymore, but I demonstrated competent skills--as always and continued to allow them to train me--even though they wouldn't even answer my questions, just rolled their eyes and turned their back on me.
On the last day of my training, they called the boss and made up lies about me. The boss won't even hear my side of things and basically suspended me from this job assignment. I didn't do anything wrong, and have never been written up, suspended OR treated so poorly in my 30 years of nursing. I now need to file for unemployment, but one of the supervisors said "If you do..you will find yourself out the door permanently" I am sitting here so confused and hurt..and broke. Wishing I would have never accepted this job to start with. (link)
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I think you need to send a letter as high up as you can. Bypass your boss by at least a couple of steps. It would be ideal to send the letter to a couple of higher ups, and mention in the letter that you have done so. That creates accountability on their end. If you choose to mail it instead of just dropping it in someone's box, you can pay a couple of dollars for delivery confirmation, which I would recommend doing.
Then, email your boss explaining your side of the situation, then CC it to his superiors. He will see that people above him have been notified. You need to outline clearly that you don't think you are being given an opportunity to voice your concerns.
If you have a copy of the letter/email from your previous complaints, make sure to lump them all together.
Hopefully, this will put some pressure on someone to resolve your issue. Speaking to your boss in person is probably not the best way to go, as they can just interrupt you, and you may get flustered and not say exactly what you want to say.
If they do fire you permanently because of false claims, especially if you feel you are being discriminated against, you may be able to take them to court for wrongful termination. I can't give you legal advice, so if you think this may be the route you want to take, I would seek out legal counsel. Knowing you may be about to be laid off, they can probably give you tips to help build a stronger case.
I hate it because there is no real "win" for you here. Best case scenario, you go back to work with people you can't stand. Don't be fooled, this is discrimination. If they push you too far, don't be afraid to push back.
Good luck, and take care.
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How long is levonorgestrel in your system, and will it show up in a lab pregnancy test
(link)
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Depending on whether you have a semi-permanent insert, are taking a daily pill, or took plan B, it will vary. From the last time you took the pill, it will most likely take about a week for it to be out of your system. Although this can vary from person to person.
Lab tests look for specific things. It isn't a comprehensive report of everything in your blood stream. If your doctor looks for the hormone present in birth control pills, and it's still in your system, then they will find it. If they aren't looking for it, they won't. Most blood tests checking for pregnancy only look for one specific hormone that your body produces when you're pregnant, so birth control wouldn't show up.
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I want to get a four pack so can anyone tell me what exercises I will need to do, in order to getta four pack...?? (link)
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There is no way to guarantee you will get a 4-pack, but I can give you a number of good abdominal exercises. You will have to drop some fat so that your new muscles can show, just doing exercises won't be enough.
(upper abs)
First is your standard crunch. Lay on your back with your knees bent and your feet flat on the floor. Go about halfway to a sitting position, hold for a second, then go back down and stop just before your shoulders hit the floor.
Second is a modified version of this. Lay on your back with your legs pointed straight up in the air. Without moving your legs, try to touch your toes and come back down.
Lastly, declined situps. Try to find a declining bench, or even a bar you can hang from. Drape your knees over the top of the bench/bar, and do a standard situp or crunch.
(lower abs)
Leg lift- lay on your back and stick your legs out about 1 inch above the ground. Slowly lift them up as high as you can until only your arms, shoulders, and head are touching the floor/bench. lower them back down and pause just before they hit the floor.
Hanging leg lift- Hang from a bar, and lift your knees up in front of you. Try to hold for a second before letting them back down.
Kicks- Lay on your back like you are doing leg lifts. Now kick your legs like you are swimming (alternate lifting each leg 6-8 inches while keeping your knees straight). Do this for a minute, rest a minute and repeat.
(Obliques-Side abs)
Side crunch- Lay on your side with your knees bent and slightly in front of you. Place on hand on your head and try to touch your hip with that elbow. Repeat.
Isolation exercise- Prop yourself up on your side so that only one foot and your hand or elbow are touching the floor. Try to maintain your body in a straight (don't let your hip start to sag). Hold this for a minute or as long as you can, switch sides and repeat.
I have a few more that I use as part of my ab regimen. You can find plently of other exercises on the internet as well. These should get you started though. Remember though, it doesn't matter how great your abs are, if they are covered by a layer of fat, nobody is going to see them. Good luck.
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i ve been cutting 4 over a year but it helps me and i know its so dangerous and i need a way to releive stress besides cutting myself before i do some thing that would lead to suicide which i have tried and thought about before.i slit my wrists verticly but it didnt work becouse i missed and i need help.helllp!!!!!
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There are a ton of ways to relieve stress besides cutting yourself or engaging in other destructive behaviors. I'll give you a few suggestions, but I would recommend getting professional help if none of them work for you.
Exercise is a proven stress reliever. Difficult exercise requires a lot of focus and determination, so your mind doesn't have as much time to wander. Also, when you're tired afterwords, it's easier to relax.
Reading is another proven stress reliever. Try to read a book or magazine and not something on the computer. The lights in a computer stimulate your brain and can stress you out more.
Most repetitive motions also relax you. Things like mowing the lawn, washing dishes, or cutting vegetables can relax you a lot.
Try to spend at least a little time outside every day. Even if you're just sitting in your lawn or on a park bench, being cooped up inside all day can drive you stir crazy.
Lastly, try to get away from using electronics excessively. By this, I mean anything with a screen (computer, tv, smart phone, ipad, etc.) Like I said earlier, the bright lights have been shown to stimulate your brain and send it into overdrive mode.
I know a lot of these things don't sound like much fun, and at first they may actually increase your stress. Any time you drastically change your lifestyle, stress is bound to happen. After a week or so, it should become part of your routine and you should feel less stressed out. Give it a try, and see if you don't feel better.
As always, if you can't find a good solution, talking to a teacher, counselor, parent, or therapist may help you find something that works for you.
Good luck, and please stop cutting. :(
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I'm so confused. My husband is the most wonderful person in the world and would do anything for me when things in our relationship are good. But when he gets upset it's like he can't handle it. He completly looses his cool. He yells, and tells me the lost horrible things to get to me. But when we are not arguing he's a completly different person. He can go from being nice and happy to being angry. He acts violent to other people when he gets mad. He has gotten into a fight with his brother numerous time over stupid things. He gets angry over very stupid things. He'll throw a tantrum, scream, cuss, punch holes in the wall and knock things down. He goes from being the nicest person ever to very mean and angry. He tried to fight a security guard at a scool event (he's a teacher/coach) because he went through a metal detector and he forgot he had a knife in his back pocket and the security guard wouldn't let him into the track meet. He always has a pocket knife in his back pocket. He got suspended from his job because of it. When he gets angry he has this scary loosk in his eyes, it's like he loses control and becomes a different person, he just acts crazy, but only when he gets mad. Other people have called him crazy and bi-polar. One minute he's happy then he'll turn around and start shouting at whatever ot whoever he's mad at, screaming & cussing. Do you think he should see a Dr? Is there something wrong with him. Do you think he has a mental disorder or something else? (link)
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He definitely has some sort of anger disorder. Whether he is actually bipolar or not, I'm not qualified to say, nor do I have enough information.
People with severe anger issues can go into almost a trance when they get angry. It's not easy for them to calm down, and they do things they wouldn't normally do. Afterwards they may even feel embarrassed or depressed about the way they acted.
You should treat it like a medical condition and see a psychiatrist. Be a little cautious though and get multiple opinions. I find that many psychiatrists are quick to prescribe a drug regardless of whether it is really the best solution. This can leave him feeling dopy without really correcting his problem.
It may be caused by an earlier event or series of events that he isn't even aware of. A therapist may help him uncover why he has so much trouble with anger, and help him confront those issues. If it's not a medical condition like bipolar disorder, then I like the non drug approach better.
Regardless, you need to get help. What happens when he hurts someone and ends up in prison? or what if he gets in a fight with someone with a knife or gun and ends up handicapped or dead? This has the potential to get very bad for both of you, so I would highly recommend looking for some professional help.
Good luck and take care.
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What does it mean when a guy asks you " What are you up to tonight"? OR " What are you doing tonight"? When he has seen you with friends and then he replies back saying " oh okay cool". End of conversation. This can not be a conversation starter because it ended it... :0 I mean why can't they just ask you to do something if they really want. What is up with this?
I mean why do guys ask this question and It can not be a conversation starter because this ended the conversation overall :0
And he is 24 and I am 24 years old as well....so we are not like in our early teens or kids.
He asked me this while he was working after we had talked a bit. (link)
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I had some trouble understanding your question, but I think I've got it. He saw you while you were out with your friends and asked you what you were doing later?
Most likely scenario is that he was fishing for an invite. Maybe he wanted to do something later, but he didn't feel like inviting himself. In this case, you probably should have extended the invitation.
Another scenario is that he was looking to invite you to something (date, party, concert, etc.), but upon seeing you had plans, he decided not to try and pull you away from them.
If you responded that you had no plans, well refer to the first possibility. He was looking for something to do later, you weren't doing anything, he looked elsewhere.
Like I said, it all hinges on how you responded to his question. If you update your question, I'll update my answer to try and explain it better.
Worst case scenario, it's ok for the girl to take the initiative. If he's talking to you, but he won't man up and ask for your number, invite you out, etc, don't be afraid to ask him. Some guys are just shy.
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My school isn't very big, so it only offers 10 AP classes (I think). But anyway, for college admissions, how many is too many? Some kids take 5 or 6 classes and they end up being miserable. I want to have time to do other things in the areas I want to focus on (Science and Foreign Languages). Anyway, in my junior and senior years I can take 4 classes each (English, math, science, French). Is that too much? If it helps any, I'm planning on applying to several Ivy League schools. Thanks in advance!
(link)
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I hate to contradict your first poster, but my experience with AP classes was a little different. I would actually recommend taking all the classes that are NOT related to what you want to study in college. I know that sounds crazy, but let me explain why.
Everyone has to take core classes in college. Generally you need a math, science, foreign language, English/composition, etc. These classes are to help you be a more rounded person and for those that still don't know exactly what they want to study, but they don't generally relate much to your major. If you take AP classes in those areas, you can skip them and start taking classes for your major right away.
Now, if you take AP classes in the area you want to study, you could run into some problems. Generally AP classes are a little easier than college classes. Regardless of what they tell you, I found my college courses much more demanding than their AP counterparts.
Secondly, you will have to start with upper level courses if you've already exempted the lower level courses. This could put you in an extremely demanding course without all the proper information. This gets even worse if you took the AP class Junior year of high school and then take the upper level class in College second semester freshman year. Not only are you lacking some information, you're trying to recall the information you do have from two years ago!
However, in areas other than your major, you won't have to take any upper level classes. You can just skip your core requirements and get straight to your major. This frees up more time to focus on the area that interests you.
Ultimately, college classes are designed to build on each other. Professors in any given department know each other. They know what the other professors teach and are therefore better equipped to prepare you for higher level courses.
I know it's completely against what most people will tell you, but this is what I found out the hard way once I got to college. Good luck!
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my 21 year old daughter will be going to jail for five months (Jail not prison). I wonder how this will affect her life. She was going to college and had a job in her college too. Will she be able to go back to college when she gets out? How will this affect her employment opportunities?
also, I fully support my daughter going to jail (because she committed the crime so I feel she must do the time, also it might be a good learning experience and toughen her up) but I do wonder how it is like there. I hear that jail guards turn a blind eye to prisoners who get assaulted or attacked, is this true?
Is there anything I can do to help her prepare herself for this?
county jail, she is going to, not prison. I don't know if that changes anything (link)
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I had a friend who had legal troubles a few years ago. However, he was a guy, and he went to prison, so his experiences will probably be a bit different.
From his experience, there is a fair amount of violence. It is generally broken up when a guard is nearby, but there are plenty of times when a guard isn't readily on hand.
Racism is rampant in prisons, and probably jails as well. People tend to stick together based on race and frequently attack people of other races. While this is extremely distasteful on the outside, it is a reality of life in jail.
From his experience, I would recommend a few things. First, make some friends as soon as she gets in. Loners are more likely to be singled out and stolen from or attacked. She should try to keep to her group and not interfere with what other people are doing. Never "tell on" anyone else. Even if they are doing something that could injure or kill someone else, it is likely to make her a victim of an attack in the future. Once you are considered a "rat" (someone who tells on other inmates to the guards), attacks will be very violent and frequent.
Most likely the first week or two will be the hardest. After that she will get used to the unique culture and will probably get along fine.
Also, because she is a girl, things should be a little easier. Things like assault and rape are less likely to happen in a women's housing unit.
This will affect her future, but it's impossible to say exactly how. Different schools have different policies regarding criminal behavior. Your best bet is to contact the school and figure out if there is anything you can do to ensure that she will still be able to attend the school when she gets out.
Since she is an adult, she will have to report this on job applications in the future. Some jobs only ask for offenses in the last 5-10 years, so she may eventually get away from this. You could also ask a lawyer if there is any way to get the charge removed from her record if she gets out on good behavior, but I'm not really in a position to give you legal advice.
I don't want to scare you (or her), but the reality is that jail isn't something to be taken lightly. She may have a relatively peaceful stay, or she may have an experience similar to my friend (he was hospitalized three times and lost most of his teeth during his first year). The important thing is to remember that the objective is to get out. If she starts fighting or doing drugs or engaging in any type of prohibited activities in jail, that five month sentence can turn into years. Good behavior will ensure she gets out on time or even early (my friend only served three years of a ten year sentence).
Good luck, and remember to hope for the best but prepare for the worst. Different jails can be as different as night and day.
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Hey guys. Okay recently I have been having trouble getting to sleep at night. its driving me crazy, as usually I fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow. The more I cant sleep the more frustrated I get. its like my mind wont shut off. Likw today I fell asleep on the couch at 10pm woke close to 11 and was really tired. So naturally I thought yes I can sleep but once I got to bed widw awake! its now 3am and here I am. Whenever Im close to sleep its like i think great now dont dp aanything to disrupt this..and then im awake again. Its frustrating because Im sleeping until the afternoon then. I just got back from travelling about two weeks ago so I dunnp if that has anything to do with it. Anyone any advice??or been through it before. I dont want to take a sleeping tablet because frankly i dont trust them. (link)
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I have had trouble sleeping as well, and here are a few things I have found throughout the years.
Don't drink any caffeine within four hours of when you plan to go to bed.
Don't use any electronics in the last hour before you go to bed. By this I mean anything with a screen, feel free to use your toaster, microwave, electric toothbrush, etc. It's been shown that the bright lights stimulate your brain and keep it from relaxing.
Don't eat for 4-5 hour before going to bed. I.E. if you want to sleep at midnight, don't eat dinner any later than 8pm.
Try to avoid lying down when you don't plan on sleeping. This helps your body associate lying down with sleeping.
Try to get some exercise every day. Even a 30 minute walk, or 10 minutes of jumping rope can help. More is better.
Exercise your brain as well. You need to wear yourself out mentally as well as physically. Do crosswords, sudokus, or read a challenging book.
Speaking of books, reading before bed is a much better way to relax than watching TV.
Repetitive motions (like washing dishes) have been shown to be great stress relievers. Let the dishes pile up all day and then wash them before bed.
Lastly, and this is the only one I came up with personally. Don't procrastinate. If there is something you've been meaning to take care of...Take care of it! If you're worried about something, you'll be thinking about that when you're in bed instead of getting some much needed Zzz.
My theory on sleep basically amounts to wearing yourself out mentally and physically, and taking care of obligations before they can cause you too much stress. I know there are a lot of things here, try a few here and there and see how they work out for you.
A lot of my recommendations come from a Dr. Oz episode on stress relief I saw a few months ago. I hope this helps, insomnia can be a real pain.
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I am 17 years old & I have small breasts. Like, they look like they belong to a 14 yr old...& I was just wondering if there were any ways to make them look any bigger?? (link)
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I can't really give you advice on clothes since I'm a guy, but I'm fairly into personal fitness, and I can share some info I picked up from a woman trainer at my gym.
Most girls neglect upper body workouts, but they do have some effect in that area. Your pectoral (chest) muscle is kind of like a wedge underneath your breast. The slim side reaches up to your shoulder, and the larger side extends down under the base of your breast.
If you do some chest exercises (pushups, chest press, dumbbell flies, etc.) you can increase the size of this "wedge". This will push your breasts up and out. It won't be a huge difference, but it can give you a little boost if that's what you're looking for.
Hope this helps.
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I'm thinking about getting my bachelor's degree in studio art because I LOVE art and always had a passion for it. I took a few classes and my professors told me that they see something in me and that I have natural talent. Although I know that I'll enjoy it, I'm afraid to major in art because I don't know what kind of career options I'll have. Should I follow my dream and go for it or just major in something that I don't enjoy just to be on the safe side? Thank you so much for your responses! (link)
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As a stand alone major, art probably isn't your best choice. However, you do have options. The competitive job market these days means people are getting two or even three majors.
This means you could study art AND something else. You could boost your chances of getting a job by looking for other majors that compliment an art major. Think advertising or graphic design.
Doing a double major might sound intimidating, but it's really not. At most U.S. universities about 50% of your classes will be for your major, 25% for your minor, and 25% will be electives. When you get a double major, you just exchange your minor and elective courses for another major. Usually you don't have to take any extra classes.
Art is kind of like acting. If you make it big, it's a dream come true, but 99% of people never do. Study art and keep trying, but have a backup plan just in case. Good luck.
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So back at the beginning of this year I dated a guy who I thought would never date me for a month. He ended up breaking up with me, but dragged it out for another month. It was my first serious relationship, and it was very hard for me. (His name is Dakota). He is an only child, and his dad is the type of guy who cheats, and is abusive (I know this for a fact). And his mom is not a strong independent person so she is belittled.
Then I met another guy named (Dakota, or Koda for short) as well. It's ironic how many things they have in common, but are so different. He has had a hard life, and works his ass off to get what he wants. He is not very academic like Dakota #1, but he is a country farm boy and can do anything asked of him outdoors.
The issue is that I care for them both.
Even after that hard breakup, i still have feelings for Dakota, and found out that he was thinking of committing suicide, and so we are friends again so that he has someone trustworthy to talk to.
So in honest opinion, would you choose the loud, funny, guy who is 100% like his father, but is smart? Or would you choose the quiet, nice farm boy who has been hurt to many times to count?
My heart tells me Koda. But then how do I get rid of this underlying attraction torwards Dakota.?
Thanks (link)
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Well, it sounds like they are both damaged goods. You probably won't like my response, but my answer is neither.
If Dakota is abusive and unfaithful (which he is if he's 100 percent like his father), then you shouldn't be with him regardless of what other good qualities he may have.
The other guy sounds like a really good guy, the problem is that I get the feeling that you aren't really all that into him. If he has already been hurt too many times, you may be setting him up to get hurt once again. I would recommend taking some time away from both of them until you get over the first guy, and then try to start something with Koda later on.
The suicide thing isn't something to be ignored, but it isn't something you should necessarily handle. If you know a friend of his, maybe you could express your concern to his friend and let him/her take care of it. The reality is that the longer you make him think there is a chance you will get back together, the worse it will get. A clean break might hurt at first, but it's ultimately his only chance at getting out of the funk that he's in.
Just to sum it all up. Take some time away from them both, and when you are over Dakota, feel free to try to have something serious with Koda. If you start a relationship with him now, while you still have feelings for the other guy, it's destined to fail and you'll just end up hurting him. Whatever you do, definitely don't go back to the abusive/cheating type. It will end horribly.
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