It's true that people have gotten pregnant from sperm that's just barely in the vaginal opening, but you've got a lot of things going for you as far as NOT getting pregnant. That includes the "time of the month" especially. Women ovulate 14 days before their periods start, so your "unsafe" days should have been long over. And the way you handled things, it's highly unlikely that any little swimmers found their way home, so to speak.
Are you having anal intercourse so that you don't have to worry about birth control? Since you and your boyfriend are becoming really, really intimate (I think anal sex, personally, is more intimate than regular sex) you should think about getting some birth control. Neither of you will want to have anal sex all of the time! Love, gigi

The best thing to do is to contact the nearest office of Planned Pregnancy. They will know what kind of actions are available to her at this point. They can also fix your friend up with birth control, and (unless state law says otherwise) they won't tell parents.
Please do this right away. When she's able to stop worrying, you'll stop worrying, and there's nothing like the feeling of solving a difficult problem! gigi

The first time you have sex, make sure that there's a lot of lubrication...your own, the condom's, or some K-Y jelly (don't use Vaseline because that will destroy the condom). Relax...push outward slightly so that you're not tensing inward. Almost certainly, the first time he enters you, it will be uncomfortable.

When he then begins to make the motions, it probably won't take very long for him to climax. That is because guys are usually over-excited the first time they have sex with a woman (I don't mean the first time they have sex, necessarily...but the first time with every woman). Every thrust will probably make you uncomfortable, and you might be pretty sore the next day as well. I would guess that 10 min. is about the average amount of time intercourse will take. The missionary position, with you on the bottom lying still, is the easiest. Later, when sex is not uncomfortable, you won't feel like lying still, but you should do that the first time. As for doing something wrong, there is absolutely nothing that a girl can get wrong when having intercourse--as long as you remember to use birth control and a condom (both are best). Good luck! gigi

It goes into your vagina, which is also the birth canal for any babies you may have someday. Your vagina is located between your rectum (where the "poop" comes out) and your urethra (where the "pee" comes out). The urethra is much smaller than the vagina but some virgin couples have been known to mistake it for the vagina, causing much pain and/or injury for the girl. Why not grab a hand mirror and take a good look at what is down there? You should become comfortable with all the parts of your body before you have sex...it will help you to enjoy the experience more. gigi

No, masturbating won't affect the timing of your period. One thing that masturbating to orgasm WILL do, if you're having your period, is to make the period heavier for a short time. This is because of the contractions of the uterus during an orgasm. gigi

He might love you a great deal. Some guys still carry around the old fashioned notions about what a "good" girl will and will not do, and hand jobs might fall into that category.
Sex is just a part of love. If he is caring and supportive in other ways, that is even more important! gigi

He might feel guilty, or just guilty about having you do that to him. Have the two of you had oral sex? If he is still a virgin at 24, he either has very strong moral beliefs about sex (it would be a good idea to check with him about this) OR he has some hang-ups. Moral beliefs range from believing that all premarital sex is sinful to only becoming close to someone you're sure you love. Perhaps that is the case, and he's never been certain of his love for someone and didn't want to take advantage of a girl he didn't know 100% he was in love with.In any case, you really should talk about it in a non-threatening way, because he could be self-conscious about it all--or he could feel guilty allowing you to manually stimulate him if he isn't doing the same for you (Is he?). In any case, he's holding back by not having an orgasm and that's rough on a guy.
If you want to talk about this some more, I'm here for you. gigi

I was wondering how old he is, and if he has a lot of sexual experience. Sometimes even boys feel guilty about sex--and sometimes they feel guilty only about certain girls, or certain sex acts, or certain sex acts with certain girls...No man would ever admit to it, but maybe he has never "cum" in front of anyone before! It could be anything really.
Don't let it affect your own confidence. Respect his wishes, but also do what feels right for you. You might mention how much you enjoy giving him pleasure...Good luck! gigi

Don't be embarrassed...I'll bet your boyfriend is pleased that he turns you on so much. And you are lucky to be so responsive.
Since there's nothing you can do to "turn it off" except make it with a guy you're not attracted to, try to relax and enjoy it, knowing that you'll never have to buy KY jelly and "fake" being turned-on so as not to destroy the guy's ego! (I was always more embarrassed by the sounds made by the wetness than by the wetness itself!) Gigi

Condoms do go bad. It could go bad from "time" (that's why there's an expiration date) or from environment (heat). If you unwrap it and it's soft and flexible and (if lubricated) moist, it's probably okay. Still, I'd recommend you get a new condom, especially since they are readily available and not expensive--and so, so important!
You are much less likely to get pregnant on your period, but it's not 100%. You ovulated 14 days before your period. That doesn't mean, though, that you won't ovulate early this month--even during your period (I swear to God this is true).
So please celebrate New Year's with a reliable condom! Gigi

All of these answers are confusing, aren't they? Everyone has a different opinion about disease, the effectiveness of condoms as birth control, etc.
Condoms are your best defense against disease. [Did you know that if a person has a cold sore on their mouth (which is really called "herpes simplex") and they touch it, and then they touch their genital area (or someone else's), they can get (or give that person) genital herpes?]
Condoms aren't the best for birth conrol, however. Your best bet is another form of birth control AND a condom.
And if you're ready for sex, you're ready for the responsibility. The easiest thing for you to do is to go to Planned Parenthood. They will answer all your questions and fix you up with the right kind of birth control for YOU.
P.S. In my experience, a lot of guys will try to get out of using condoms at the last minute. I don't think this will happen to you, but you should be aware of it, and be ready to say, "no."
Gigi

In reference to a previous answer: Birth control of any kind does not cause cancer. Certain hormones in much larger doses taken by menopausal women has been shown to increase the chances of breast cancer in some women.

All of your advisers, including me, have assumed you mean the Pill. If you need to know about the side effects of other birth control measures, please ask another question. Gigi

Are you a serious dieter, or a very very skinny girl to begin with who has lost weight? This is one reason why your period can stop. How long have you had your period? Some girls, when they first start to get periods, may skip a month or two and what little fluid does turn up is kind of brownish (this happened to me). Other reasons for "amenorrhea" (the medical term) include problems with your ovaries or problems with your thyroid. There's nothing to be scared about, but I know it's easier for me to say than for you to feel. Believe me, what you describe doesn't sound fatal, or even really embarrassing (unless it's happening to you, I guess). If you just started getting your period within the last six months, breathe a sigh of relief and forget the whole thing. If "new period" isn't the answer to your problem, you need to tell your mom and see a doctor--not because there's anything horribly wrong, but because he or she can fix you right up. Honest! Gigi

I have had what I term a "soap opera life". In other words, I've seen it all. Almost.

I work in health care and I'm as old as the hills (not that old, I guess--but I'm definitely not a kid) so feel free to ask whatever you like.


NOTE: I AM NOT MY OWN FAVORITE COLUMNIST (SEE BELOW)!!!! I just hit the wrong button...

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