Am a bit of a wrinkly now (i was 24 on 4/9/05, but I had the best birthday I've ever had in my whole entire life!!!) but I know an awful of stuff about an awful lot of stuff!
I am COMPLETELY NON-JUDGEMENTAL and you can always inbox me with stuff you wouldn't ask anyone else @ MelanieHarvey81@Hotmail.Com
Mel xxx
"Dance like no one is watching and love like you've never been hurt"
E-mail: MelanieHarvey81@Hotmail.Com
Gender: Female
Location: Long story, born in Germany, Parents are Spanish but grew up in the UK!!!
Occupation: General Superstar and all around heroine!
Age: 24
Member Since: December 24, 2004
Answers: 356
Last Update: July 20, 2007
Visitors: 25981
Main Categories:
Love Life
General Sex Questions
Health
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when guys finger you or have sex with you do they hate it when your down there is hairy or do they not care? (link)
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Hi there,
Different guys like different things!
The best thing to do is ask, and if you aren't brave enough to ask then go for something sort of mid-way between the two extremes!
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16/f
My boyfriend and I had sex. His parents found out, how they found out is a long story that wouldn’t mean much to you. Anyways…to the point; I have never been so embarrassed in my life. Does anyone have a story, about their parents or this partners parents finding out, to share with me, so I don’t feel so dumb? Or any story at all that is. It’s silly I know, but I need something that helps me know... I’m not the only one whos parents have found out. Thanks :) (link)
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Oh my god!!
I still burn with shame when I think about it!
Me and my partner had been together about 7 months and we were looking into buying a house together but at the time he was living back with his parents and I was sharing with a work colleage, so we didn't really have much space to ourselves.
Anyway, his parents were going on holiday to Greece for 2 weeks and told us we could have full use of the house as they were worried about leaving it empty. So they told us that they would be leaving the house at 7 - We ASSUMED they meant 7am!!
Well we both got back from work at about half 5 and went straight upstairs where we stayed for the next hour doing the do!
We then just chucked on our underwear and went downstairs as we were both a bit thirsty by that point only to find his Mum, Dad and Great-Auntie sat around the kitchen table quietly sipping tea, obviously having heard everything that had just happened!
I can honestly say I have never been so embarrassed in my life!! You do get over it though!!
Mel
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OK, So I've read a article about not douching. It says that it takes longer for women to get pregnant and even when they do they have a higher chance of having a etopic pregnancy. Also it stated that you can get bacterial vaginosis (Kind of like a yeast infection) easier. This sucks after reading it because I ahve always douched. I don't ever FEEL clean until I do. Which is once a week or week and a 1/2. Can I empty the contents of the bottle and just use water? Is that any less harmful or about the same? (link)
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Hiya,
Douching is not accepted as an effective form of birth control, doctors discourage it as a method of birth control as it can sometimees PUSH the sperm further into your uterus!
Some reports have concluded that douching is harmful and should be discouraged because of its association with pelvic inflammatory disease, ectopic pregnancy, and perhaps other conditions.
Most women douche in an to attempt to cleanse the vaginal area, this is probably not a good idea. The vagina has its own natural cleaning system that flushes out bacteria. So not only do the chemicals and perfumes in feminine sprays and douches not help, they can actually cause problems like allergic reactions or infections in the vagina.
The best thing you can do is leave your body to do what it is meant to and take frequent baths.
Take care.
Mel xx
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hey! ok well this is for anyone who has had sex and knows what they are talkin about. if your on your period, should you have sex? or will the stuff get everywhere and its not a good idea? plz rate plzplzplz!! xoxo thanx! (link)
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Hi there,
It is entirely personal choice!
Depending on how heavy your periods are will depend on how messy it gets.
There are +'s and -'s to it.
-'s are that it can get messy!
+'s are that having an orgasm can alleviate period pain! If it does get messy you get to shower together after!
It is entirely yours and your artners choice whether to or not but if you do, may I recommend an old towel/blanket underneath you both to save staining anything important!
Take care
Mel xx
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Me and my boyfriend had sex 4 or 5 days ago, he didn't cum but wen he pulled out to check if everything was ok the condom was broken. Im worried that i may be pregnant due to pre-ejaculation, even though we don't think he ejaculated at all. There was a white liquid in the condom and i am debating on what it was, lubrication or pre-ejaculation??....I have no symptoms and was due yesterday. My period isnt regular but has only been REALLY late once. What do you think I should do? Are we over reacting? PLEASE REPLY IM WORRIED!!!!! (link)
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Hi there,
The first thing you need to do is STOP WORRYING!!
Stress can cause your periods to be irregular and late so worrying will not help!!
It is true that you could be pregnant as his penis was inside you without a condom! (A broken condom doesn't count!)
My advice to you would be to wait another few days, try to calm down (I know it's hard!), if there is still no sign of your period then do a home testing kit.
Depending on what the results are depends on what you do next. If the result is negative then you've had a lucky escape and could think about going onto the birth control pill as well as using condoms! (You can never be too safe!)
If the result comes up positive then talk to your parents/boyfriend/friend/doctor and take things from there.
Good luck, I have my fingers crossed for ya!
Mel xx
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with all that i hear going around especially in the media, its difficult for me to decide whether sexual orientation is a mental, psychological, or conscience choice. do people decide to do it out of their own free will? is it both? any help is appreciated - will rate (link)
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Hi there,
Personally I think it is a combination of all of those things.
I have quite a few gay friends and some of them are convinced they were "Born Gay" while others think that it is because of their upbringing and one was straight all of his life until he met a certain guy who he has now happily been with for 6 years!
Sexual orientation is completely personal preference, no one can MAKE you gay and no one can MAKE a gay person straight!
Bi-Sexual people are not people who can't make their mind up they are people that prefer to choose to have relationships with people of BOTH sexes! This is a choice made by them for whatever reason!
It brings us back to the age old question are we made who we are by nature or nurture. Are we destined to be the way we are from birth or is it the way in which we are brought up and our environmental surroundings that make us who we are.
As I said before I personally think it is a combination of both.
I hope this helped a little!
Mel xx
(P.s Great to see an intelligent question on here for once!! :o)
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Is it normal to have the feeling like your going to pee during masturbation? even when my boyfriend fingers me i feel like i have to pee even if i pee before. Is this normal? (link)
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Hi there,
This is completely normal!
It is because your bladder is very close to your vagina and depending on which way your partner is touching you it may be pressing on your bladder.
Try getting him to change positions if you feel the sensation, if you don't feel happy doing that then experiment on your own then next time you are together guide his hand to an area that still gives you pleasure but doesn't make feel like you are gonna pee!!
Take Care!
Mel
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So. I know gross but i think it is safe to say this is mostly populated with girls so you all in some way sometime in your life come into a problem simular to this.
So my boyfriend and I have been sexual active for 6 months and a month ago we stopped using condoms because it was comfortable for either him and or i. Sex without a condom was much more comfortable for both him and i. But I do not recomend it to anyone, use protection...Anyways after the first time we did that I got a urinary track infection, which i didnt go to the doctors for because it wasnt life threatning or anything. Anyways after a couple days it got worse, i was getting white discharge all the time when i used the rest room or when i was just walking around i felt leaking...about two weeks later it got worse, i was ichty down there every once and awhile and the white discharge increased and it started to get an oder. Well I douched and started taking care of myself as much as I could and it went away. While having the UTI i was still having sex but it didnt seem to bother it. Well today after intercourse he noticed thick white discharge on him and I on me. I smelled it but it didnt really have an oder at all and I was very confused, so i went to the restroom and whipped and noticed spotting of blood im suppose to start my period tomorrow so i just wrote it off to that and put a tampon in but when i took it out, it was completly dry not one thing on it. Well later last night we had sex again, but the thing is I orgasmed more than the first but I didnt have the thick white discharge this time...I thought that was kind of weird.
See I was thinking could it be, because we are having sex without a comdom and my body is just getting use to it. Or is it what my boyfriend said...that we dont have lube so he was rubbing me too much and maybe tearing me a little and that could be the reason but I dont know how it could be...
Im very confused. Please dont tell me to go see a doctor i cant afford to no health insurance and Im just wondering if it should be something to be totally freaked out on?
if you have any advice let me know. i will rate you very high...thank you for your time have a great day...and sorry if this grossed you out. (link)
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Hi there,
I know you said not to advise seeing a doctor but you really need to see some sort of healthcare professional.
There is no-one on here that can really advise you what it is as there are all sorts of discharges you get for all sorts of reasons.
When it comes to your health it is really not worth risking it. You BOTH need to be checked out to rule out the possibility of anything nasty.
It could be something as simple as your body not being used to sex without a condom or it could be something that needs medical treatment.
Am not sure where you live as you don't say but in most countries of the world there are free sexual health clinics, you and your bf should get along to one!
Take care and sorry I can't tell you waht it is but this is the best advice I can give you.
MEl xx
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Ok here u goes. I'm 17/male. And there's our neighbor sta**/Female who's 30. The problems that I think she sexually desires me. It all starts when she began to smile to me 2 month ago just after we moved to this new neighborhood. Anyway I was surprised last morning when she called me while passing her house. (She was outside and I respond her). So she handled my hand and moved it inside the shirt &I touch her breast. I can't deny that I felt erotic in that moment." I WANT U": Were her words. She told me that she wants 4rom me to have sex with her. Then I removed my hand quickly saying that I am late for school and I run away.
I am confused….should I refused or agreed?? Because she really success to seduce me and SHE'S REALLY HOT and SEXY and I am physically attracted to her. I know that she's older… What should I do????
Ps: I flirt many times and had sex 3 times.
Thanks 4 advices. Justin
Email:justin_frogy@yahoo.com
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Hey there,
Sounds like you are in a bit of a dilemma to me!
You have 2 options, say yes and sleep with her. Or turn hurt down.
What you need to do is weigh up the pro's and con's. What bad things could happen if you do sleep with her/what good things could happen if you do sleep with her, and decide from their.
It sounds to me though that she is preying on the fact that you are young and she is hot just to use you for sex.
Do you have any other feelings for this woman, does she have any for you?
If I were personally in your situation I would say politely but firmly that you don't want to have sex with her. (you don't have to give a reason)
Think how it could affect your family life - I mean what if it all went wrong and it started to affect the rest of your family.
You don't say whther she is married or has kids or not.
If you wanna chat anymore about it then e-Mail me at MelHarvey@hotmail.co.uk
Whatever you decide to do, do it because you want to not becuase someone else wants you to, and ALWAYS have safe sex!
Take Care
Mel xx
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Alright...weird question..but oh well. My boyfriend always likes to like suck on my nipples...(heh)...and now like a week later I have a weird scab thing and its never happened before..and we've been together to a year..so umm why did this happen now? (link)
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Hey there!
It sounds like he sucked a little too hard and gave you the equivalent of a hickey on your nipple!!
Tell him to be a little more gentle next time!
As for the scab, don't worry about it it will heal pretty quickly, keep it clean and dry and whatever you do don't pick it!
TC
Mel
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ok look i shave down there and wen i do like a day after there is red bumps and they hurt a lil like wen i put on my jeans and i do use shaving cream and soap wen i dont have any (link)
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Hey there!
Dontcha just hate razor burn!!
The best thing you can use is shaving gel, a sharp razor and afterward apply a damp hot towel for a few minutesd - this makes the pores open slightly so you won't get half as many bumps the day after as it enables the hair that is just under the skin to escape - which is waht creates the bumps!
The best thing I have found that soothes razor burn is Vitamin e cream. It is relatively cheap and you can get it in most drugstores.
Another thing that will stop you from getting bumps is to wait until you have at LEAST 3-5MM of regrowth before you do it again otherwise you may find that each time you do it the bumps get worse because the hairs get even more ingrown.
TC
Melxx
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how long does sex usually last...? (link)
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Hi there,
It depends entirely on the 2 individuals having sex!!
Some people last for hours some people only 5 minutes!
It also depends what kinda sex you are having!
As long as you both enjoy it it doesn't make any difference how long it lasts!! ;o)
Mel
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whats the fastest way to get rid of a white head(like a pimple) (link)
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HI there,
DON'T POP IT!! If you do it'll scab over then you'll have a big ugly scab!!
The best thing to do it's to clean it with warm water and then dab on hydrogen peroxide. If you skin is too sensitive for harsh chemicals then dab on a little tee tree oil!
This normall dries them out overnight!
Also make sure you don't touch it then touch anywhere else as it may spread the bacteria and give you another!
TC and hope it goes away soon!!
Mel xx
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i have these little bumps on my nipples. my mom said they were just like pimples, but yeah, they're not going away. and they're gross. well, not really that bad, they're just little bumps, weird huh? anybody know anything about this? should i go 2 a doctor? (link)
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Hi there,
First of all, ignore cutie, it is not cancer!!
Like people before have said most girl when they start to mature physically get these little bumps.
They are not harmful and although they aren't great to look at they will most likely go away after puberty (although some peoples don't)
If your Mom doesn't think that they are anything to worry about then chances are shes right! If you are really worried though then get her to take you to the doctors to get them checked out.
Take care
Mel xx
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My friend told me her doctor said it is possible to get your period while your pregnant once or twice. I would guess she means in the earlier stages of pregnancy, but im wondering if thats true. Also, lets say you had unprotected sex and then 3 days later got your period which lasted for about 2 and a half days, is it possible that you are pregnant or is it certain you are not? (link)
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Hiya!
Chances are that the person that had just got her period would NOT be pregnatnt BUT it has been known for a woman to go through a whole pregnancy having periods.
If she thinks that she is pregnant or if you think she might be than the best thing you can do is get her a pregnancy trst.
Whatever happens please be happy!!
If you need to talk more then please inbox me!
Take care
Mel
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what does libido mean? (link)
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Hey!
As per the first answer!!
To be fair though when you use it in everyday language it is the equivalent to saying "Sex Drive"
If someone's libido is slow then generally thier sex life is slow and vice-versa!
Take care!
Mel
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Ohkay, please no stupid answers. But one of my guy friends said that "there is nothing better than to hear a girl moan when ya finger her". does it come natural to moan or do you jus do it to make the guy happy? (link)
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Hey there,
It depends on whether or not you are enjoying it!!! *blushing at my age!*
If someone is doing something that you like to your body it is only natural for you and your body to let them know in some way!
It's the same as if someone punched you you'd shout "ouch" wouldn't you? *Well most people would*
There are no rules - each person is different - some people moan louder than a chocoholic on a diet - some people are silent!
Thing is every person is different - when it happens to you just do what feels natural to YOU....
And most importantly have fun and BE SAFE!!!
Take care
Mel
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We have been together for 6 months and had a good sex life, but lately I have to initiate sex and often get rejected. My partner did make the comment that he has issues with my weight, which hurt me, but his loss of libido has been an issue that he has had before with other partners so I'm trying not to take it personally. This is very hard and find myself often getting very upset that he doesn't fancy me.
He has type 1 diabetes but was masturbating regularly before so he doesn't seem to be suffering from a sexual dysfunction, it also hurts that he masturbates, but doesn't want to have sex with me. We are very affectionate and loving couple in other ways and love each other very much. I'm finding it very hard to bolster my self esteem in this situation though, which is exacerbating the problem. I sometimes feel like running away then sorting out the problems. I hate that I'm feeling rejected and needy of him.
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Hey,
I'm a 24 yr old F from the UK.
I don't want to post my response on this site cos the vast majority of the users are teens and I don't wanna disillusion them at this tender age! I would, however, like to give a response,
Please inbox me your username and i'll leave you a reply to your question directly to your inbox or eMail me directly @MelanieHarvey81@hotmail.com
If you choose to do neither then take care and I am sure things will work out for the best.
Take Care
Melanie
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so i have a birthmark on my penis, and its not huge or anything, but its noticeable. would girls get freaked out if they saw it? and how would you go about removing one at a doctor or something?
thanks
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Honey, as a 24 year old woman , a birthmark doen not do anything to change your sexual ability.
My fella has a birthmark on his penis.
As the song says "it ain't what you do it's the way that you do it!"
As long as you love and respect the preson you want to have sex with it won't matter one bit...... promise ya!!!
If you want anymore advice or need a chat with a bloke then you can e-Mail ME on my address MelHarvey@hotmail.co.uk...... or if you want my fiance's point of view then e-Mail the same addy but put "FAO ROB!!!!"
Take Care and don't worry, ypou are completely normal!!!
Mel
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society tells us that having premarital sex is wrong, (risk of pregnancy, stds...) but also emotionally, that you cant handle a breakup after you lose your virginity to someone, it changes your life forever, etc. I know all of that, but is it true with EVERY SINGLE relationship that if you have premarital sex, it'll drive you two apart and you'll eventually break up. How wrong is it to have sex in highschool (only with 1 person of course and you keep it between yourself.) my boyfriend and I have been going out for 7 months and I want to have sex with him eventually but I'm afraid it'll make us break up... why does that happen? like think back in the 1940's, if you got pregnant both of you would drop out of highschool and GET MARRIED...why cant it be like that these days? (link)
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To be honest the first thing that strikes me about you is that you are a very responsible young person an that you always think about the consequences before you do anything.... this alone tells me that if you decide to divulde in pre-marital sex that you won't be doing it irresponisibly.
Depending on your faith there are lot's of "Do's" and "Dont'D"
It amkes no difference what you believe in of whatyour parents force upon you. As long as you take into consideration your future everytime you think about going against what they've said, and it's what YOU want then you shouldn't have a problem with it.... at the end of the day "Viva el Dia" - Live for the day!!!
Take Care
Mel
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