Just here to help
I don't sugar coat things, I am honest and truthful
Hi,
My name is "Lucy" Of course that isn't my real name.
I answer any questions that come to my in box, However if you don't receive an answer within 2 days more than likely your question has been rejected for a good reason.
I answer anything of the following only;
Relationships/Relationship Abuse/Cheating/Family Issues/Depression/Anxiety/Random Weirdos
NOTE: At times I am brutally honest this is not intended to offend anyone as I am here to give advice. I am straight to the point and I put a finger down on certain questions asked.
- Lucy
Age: 26
Member Since: September 17, 2009
Answers: 575
Last Update: July 24, 2010
Visitors: 32630
Main Categories:
Love Life
Families
Random Weirdos
View All
Favorite Columnists
NinjaNeer
WittyUsernameHere
ThirdQED
|
| |
Hello, I'm a new user and I've been looking through questions and getting a feel for things. Well, I stumbled upon a younger woman asking for advice. You answered her, but gave absolutely no help to her. I find that completely rude and ignorant considering what you wrote and the fact that your advice column says " NOTE: At times I am brutally honest this is not intended to offend anyone as I am here to give advice. I am straight to the point and I put a finger down on certain questions asked.
- Lucy"
Yes, you were brutally honest with your opinion, OhMyLucyDarling, but in no way did you give advice. And obviously you did intend to offend the woman ( contrary to your NOTE) and put her down rather than giving her constructive criticism.
I think that maybe you should read the others who wrote, because they are all using the website better than you. They are giving help based on the person rather than trying to add more grief and guilt to the problem.
To jog your memory on what question this was, here you go:
I'm a 21 year-old mother of a three year-old and a one year-old. My 3 year old has a problem following orders and as much as we punish her and hit her, I'm ashamed to say, she still won't listen. She has no hearing problems she's just disobedient. I don't want her to feel left out cause of her brother and I defenately don want to continue hitting her but I will not allow her to have her way with everything. My husband and I fight about this so much and I need to know what can I do to solve this problem. Please help???!!!
Thank you for your time and I hope you have learned something. I would more than appreciate a reply.
-T
(link)
|
If she didn't want to hear it, She shouldn't of posted it. That simple
Any futher inbox messages from you will be deleted
|
Is 19 too young to be having sex? Just a note I think premarital sex is perfectly okay as long as you're responsible.
The reason I am asking this is because I want to get my Gardisil shot, and my mom would know about it, and she believes that the only people that get it are those who are sexually active or will be in the near future.
I live at home (except I go to school out of state). What should I do when she questions my reasons for getting the shot? Should I tell her I'm sexually active and I want to protect myself? I'm just kind of in a tough situation right now because I have a boyfriend, whom I'm keeping a secret from my family (he's black, and I don't know how my family would react to that). I told my mom a bit about him, and that we are bests friends, and that yes I do spend the night at his place every once in a while but we don't do anything (which is a lie, but I figured my mom can just assume whatever she assumes).
Yup, so what should I do? Tell my mom I'm sexually active, or keep lying to her about it. I mean 19 isn't too young to have sex, right?
(and just a note, I'm on birth control and we use condoms, so no lectures). Oh and if it matters, he is 23. (link)
|
You are doing everything right.
You are 19 years old, You are protecting yourself.
No, 19 is not too young to have sex, You are an adult. It is your choice to tell your mother however keep in mind you are an adult and you are entitled to your privacy. You do not have to tell your mother anything, At 19 you are old enough to seek birth control on your own you no longer need your mothers permission. Also, at your age you can also date who ever you wish to date your mother has no control over it. I would tell your family about your boyfriend, If you plan on marry him someday he will be family sooner or later. Don't hide him from the family, Be open and be happy with your relationship.
|
My fiance and I joined a gym about 2 years ago. We went for a year, then decided to trim it out of our budgets because $80 a month for the two of us was a little steep. We received a letter notifying us that we had 30 days to cancel in person or we would have our membership automatically renewed for another year. My fiance (whose name both memberships were under for credit purposes) was, at the time, away on military training, and unable to make it in to the gym. He called and asked if he could cancel over the phone because of his circumstances. They said it wouldn't be a problem, and that they'd take care of it.
Fast forward a few months, and we're still paying. We call, he talks to the manager, manager apologizes and tells him that our overpayment will be refunded and that our membership will be cancelled. Good enough.
Fast forward ANOTHER few months, and we have now been paying for this gym membership for the last 8 months, even though we've called to get it cancelled about 2 dozen times. Every time the manager isn't in (only works select weekdays during business hours. We tried to e-mail the head office, but received no response. We called the head office yesterday, and they said they wouldn't have any records of our phone calls, and that they'd have to talk to the manager of the branch (who of course wasn't in). After all this, I checked our bank balance again today and they charged us ANOTHER bi-monthly payment AFTER our phone call, even though she told us our membership had been cancelled!
I am furious and frustrated. We're out about $900 because of this, and we're both students. We haven't cancelled the automatic withdrawal, because we're worried that his credit will take a hit if we don't make payments.
What is our recourse if the gym decides they don't want to refund our money? There are apparently no recordings of the phone calls (because we're naive, and gave them the benefit of the doubt) and the manager can easily just lie. We can't afford a lawyer to take them to small claims court.
Please tell me there's some hope for us. (link)
|
When you join the Gym they should of given you an agreement paper that had the signiture of the owner on it. If you still have this paper, Save it you are going to need it.
This is a case that you are going to have to take to court, Go to your local bank print up all the bank statement records take it with you.
If you can't afford a lawyer at this time, Look into getting a public defender they are free.
You could also go in person and speak to the manager, Better to record the conversation. More proof the better. Likewise, You are looking at pressing charges.
|
|
ok so im 14 female and i have pimples all over my chin, some on my forehead, and cheeks. i know every teen has acne but it sucks! my acne has never been horrible but i just broke out bad for some reason. i've tried skin essentials, clearasil, mint julip masks, some mary-kay acne stuff, campho-phenique, i wanted to do skin ID but i can only get it online and you have to sign up for a month thing and ugh! point is i can't do it. i also use toner but that didn't do anything and using all this stuff dried out my skin so now i have to put moisturiser on my face. i haven't tried proactive yet but i heard it dries out your skin. i REALLY don't want to start the new school year with acne! please help me. i don't know what products to use that will clear up my acne but not dry out my skin ???? thank you so much for any helpful answers :) (link)
|
Have you tried Proactive? I heard a lot of great things about it. I recommend you try it out
http://www.proactiv.com/index.php?uci=ous111&refcd=GO003483s_proactive&tsacr=GO5474306298&s_kwcid=TC|7754|proactive||S|e|5474306298&gclid=CKPn4uKX5aICFcl25Qod7TEJxw
It is the new "stuff" now
|
|
I am wanting to get a bear that costs $10, and a Woody outfit (from Toy Story) that costs $15. This should all be $25 plus tax, but I was wondering if there were any extra fees with it? Like does it cost extra money to stuff the bear? I don't plan on buying other clothes, accessories, or getting a voice chip or anything. Just those two things. :) Thanks! (link)
|
Hi :)
Build a Bear is a process, They charge for the bear which when you buy it it's not yet stuffed. They charge for the clothing yes, However if you wanted to add sound effects..They charge for that as well. The last time I went to build a bear they did not charge me for stuffing the bear because the cost for the bear itself including stuffing it.
Good luck! Happy Bear hunting
|
I'll just get right to the point here.
There's this really CREEPY guy whos two years older than me (he's about 17) and he has always bothered me...
i used to be friends with him, and a few months ago, he mysteriously got my phone number and began to text me
i left my phone for awhile, and when i came back, i had 5 or so missed calls from him and a voicemail or two.
This started a seemingly NEVER ENDING period where he would just call me non-stop all day, send me pictures of himself (just his face, looking sad, texting me, and leaving me voicemails. He must of called me 60 or so times over the course of a weekend. I never answered once which made him angry.
He began to call less and less until the point where he'd only call me once every few weeks.
I just ignored him in school and out of school.
So summer started about a week ago, and he started texting me again. and he was all like "oh we should date" or "why wont you give me a chance" and then he started getting really creepy and making me uncomfortable by saying things like "i think your so gorgeous and beautiful" and "how far have you gone with a guy, just curious". then he was all like "dont i seem like a really sweet guy because of the stuff im saying" and "why wont you just give me a chance, i can be a really nice guy if you get to know me"
by the way id like to say, i was NOT leading him on, so PLEASE dont try to stick up for him. i was truly trying to be nice to him-im always nice to people even when i dont like them.
he was also lying to me about how he "no longer smokes weed". this is a lie. hes a complete pothead, always has been. i hold a grudge with the whole stoner thing, but thats kind of a different story.
anyways, now for the bad part...yeah that wasnt the bad part.
so today he started texting me, and i pretty much told him to stop talking to me because he really annoyed me...and he FLIPPED out on me. he started calling all these mean names and stuff...a few of the texts were: (i apologize for the horrible language, but i just want to show the extremity of this..)
(i told him to go bother someone else, he replied with) "Ok. I will you fucking two-faced hobag"
or
(i said something like "wow your really pathetic arent you?" he replied with) "No you are a fucking cum guzzling thunder cunt. ok now stop texting me you ungreatful fuck up."
trust me, im a big girl, i can defend myself. some creep being a douchebag to me doesnt usually phase me too much, but THIS...really pushing it. Then it got worse
he started turning it around on me, saying that if i continued to text him he'd file harassment.
...
IS THAT A JOKE? after HE called me hundreds of times only a few months ago??
so then i told him to go to sleep (something like that) and he suddenly says this: "Why dont you go die. or i will make it happen."
i have to things to say about this.
1.I lost a very good friend of mine this year, along with another classmate, and death is still a sensitive subject, i try to avoid it if i can help it.
2. could this be considered a death threat? after i told him "thats pretty low. how dare you say something like that?" and he replied with "I wasnt kidding."
I dont think ive ever been so mad in my life.
he also started to get all snippy with me, like when i yelled at him and told him that was a serious thing to threaten he just replied with "ok cupcake". i just stopped talking to him after that
i couldnt even speak. i didnt know if i wanted to cry or blow up. he made me so frusturated and mad and, to be honest, scared. but i would never give him the satisfaction that he scared me
i dont know what to do. i already told me younger sisters about all of it, and i would like to tell my parents, but id be afraid theyd blow the situation up and report it to the police and everything. im not saying its unreasonable, i mean, its not, but it would be out of my control, you know?
and i know it was wrong to continue pressing the conversation, but whats done is done, and it ended up like this.
what should i do exactly? press charges? brush it off? try to talk it out? i dont know!? any input would be great :) (link)
|
Being nice doesn't always pay off, Especially for certain ass hats that don't want to listen.
Be stern with him, Let him know where he stands and stop beating around the bush. If you want him to stop calling then you tell him. (Stop calling my phone, I am not interested in you) If this doesn't work a second time around guess what If he keeps on calling you save it. Save all the text messages and calls to your phone. As long as you continue to ignore him then he has nothing to use against you when you file a complaint.
Good for you for standing your ground, Nobody should date someone who is demanding and manipulative. You could also try going to your phone company and see if they could block the number from your phone. I believe if they can do this, It might cost you an extra 10 bucks but should be worth it.
I also do agree with KarenR, I wouldn't try to talk it out because it does seem to egg him on, For now I would continue to ignore him. The more you ignore his calls the less and less he will bother you. Sure, He stopped calling then picked up again but if you don't show him any reaction and continue to ignore him then overtime he will get bored and move on.
Remember this one line, "Silence can be the best medicine." If he doesn't stop calling you, Then I would go to the police and file a complaint against him. Again, Make sure you save all calls, voice mails, and text messages.
|
|
What are some good summer reading books? i just finished the pretty little liars series (link)
|
Some of my personal favorites..
The lovely bones
The Ice Child
Midnight voices
Black Seconds
Vampire Kisses
Before I fall
Whisper (author Phoebe kitanidis)
|
I use to watch Amanda Bynes on the Amanda Show on Nickelodeon for years it seems like. I really thought she was pretty awesome. I think I heard not too long ago that she did some shots for the Maxim magazine, which is really weird because I never thought of her like that and never thought she was gorgeous or anything.
Anyway, whatever, I did hear that she announced she had retired from acting on Twitter. Is that true? And when exactly did this happen? I'm reading a few news stories and it seems like they can't get their facts straight about this so can somebody just tell me exactly rather than sending me to yet another page trying to figure out this Amanda Bynes thing? I'm just curious...that's all
And how old is she? Don't you have to be like really old to retire? (link)
|
According to Yahoo...
Amanda Bynes stated that acting wasn't as fun as it seemed, She had retired at the age of 24. There wasn't a lot of detail but her last movie was set to be released in September of this year.
|
F/17
For years I've been shaving down there, and basically I need a way to stop getting red bumps and cuts.
I use a new razor almost everytime, and I use anti-bump gels. I can't figure out the best way, I think my skin is just too sensitive. Is it better to wax? And what strips are recommended?
Any ideas?
Thanks :) (link)
|
What type of razor do you use? As a lot of why you cut and get bumps could very well be because you aren't using the proper razor ;)
I've been shaving down there for 10 years and I have used a variety of razors but I strongly recommend using intuition. Here is an example of what I am talking about..
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_heKbL8SUewE/SstMUiQjG0I/AAAAAAAAKfk/6MYA0vGstI0/s400/schick+options.jpg
I have never had a problem, No bumps or cuts! :)
It can be found at Walmart for about 9 dollars, Refills can be about 20 bucks... but a pack should come with an extra razor and it will last you about 2 months.
EDIT: Sure, :) I use Pure Silk
http://www.theluxuryspot.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/pure-silk.jpg
|
I just bought a new 40" LCD TV. I am wondering if
spending the 10.00 a month extra for the Direct TV
HD package is worth it?
The picture looks great to me now without it. Will I really notice a big difference adding HD?
Thank you. (link)
|
In my opinion why waste the money if the TV already looks good? Sure if you want to spend the extra money go for it...but I would pocket the money instead of paying for something that might make a little big of a difference.
|
|
19/f. I am a full time college student and during the school year, there's no way i can have a job. i was thinking of getting a summer job, but right now i can't find one. i've searched EVERYWHERE! it's not like i haven't. i just need need to make some extra cash on the side. it doesn't have to be a lot. i'd just like to be able to buy my boyfriend things. he always buys me gifts and cute things and I feel bad sometimes because i want to get him stuff too. he doesn't work either but his parents give him money. my parents barely make any money, at least not enough so they can give me for spending money. i just want to make maybe like $400 a month. less than that is ok too. just spending money. i make these really amazing chocolate lollipops and i use to sell them in high school for fundraisers. but, i don't know if people would buy them now. something like that would be good for me. just something i can do. i can't really handle a job right now. i tried that and i couldn't do it. i don't have the money to pay for college and i have a full scholarship because i have good grades, so i need to keep them up. tutoring is a little harder for me to do because i don't know that many kids other than my family and i wouldn't charge them. any ideas on what i can do to get some spending money on the side but that it won't interfere with my school. thanks! (link)
|
Make some baby sitting ads, You could try babysitting during the summer. You don't have to over charge, You don't have to under charge just ask for about 8-10 dollars an hour. Most mothers would rather hire someone who is older and more mature then rather hire some 13 year old and by putting out ads you have a hire chance at getting a phone call.
You could also try dog walking, Many people don't always have time to walk their dogs while they are at work and someone needs to let the dogs out to go to the bathroom that could be you.
If you make some chocolate lollipops, It wouldn't hurt to try and sell them even if you sold them in packs of 3 for 2 bucks, Money is money and it all ads up in the end. If you have a senior center nearby you could try selling them there.
There are always ideas out there, You just have to find them but I would try doing these things I suggest and hopefully it all works out for you.
Good luck
|
|
do girls care or think its gross or w/e if a guy mastrobates? (link)
|
No, Everyone does it. It's normal
|
I recently met this guy from this website.
He's really funny & doesnt take anything seriously. And he calls me names like 'bubba' & 'bum bum'. :D
Does anyone know what kind of names [like them ^^] that could call him ?
Thanks x
Btw, if it helps, his name is Tom. (link)
|
Those names are a little odd...but okay
Sounds like more of pervert
|
|
Is there a condition when you can't controll your emotions? Like maybe one time you feel happier than ever and then fell really pissed off and go running off and killing someone or something like that? (link)
|
Bipolar can be considered a possibility
|
Can you get armpits waxed? And if so, how does it compare to shaving?
thanks. (link)
|
Yes you can, I believe it last a little longer rather if you were to shave naturally but the pain is probably unbearable. Oww?!
|
I usually have very clear skin I only get the occasional zit but sometimes I get those very big painful ones...
OF COURSE....I now have one right on the tip of my nose. I have a required class field trip this Saturday and I'm really attracted to this guy in my class it's gonna suck if I'm self conscious about my nose all day long.
It was still in the red stage, like before it turns into the kind that obviously can be popped...or so it looked....but just now I sort of squeezed it and it popped even though it didn't look ready.... So now I need help
Whats the best way to shrink it down by Saturday??? (It's Wednesday night) It doesn't have to be completely gone just gone enough to cover it up with make up and not be able to see it.
So I guess this is a two part question how do I get rid of the redness quickly??
And whats the best way to cover it up with make up?? (link)
|
Clean it frequently and place a cold cloth on it, Cold cloth with help with swelling and soreness. Try doing this a good couple times a day and it should go down
|
can somebody please tell me what prude means? Somebody called me a prude, and I have no idea what it means but from the way they said it I can only assume I was supposed to be insulted by it.
Thank you (link)
|
It means you are technically a Goodie
(Someone who is proper, Modest could be considered a prude to some people)
Being called a prude is no compliment, Yes it is insulting.
|
Hey there advicenators!
I was just wondering if anyone had been 2 marmaris and stayed at the Baris aparthotel? I just wanna know what you thought!
All help much appreciated!
lxxx (link)
|
I just googled some reviews for you and out of curiosity I read some of them. I'm going to have to say probably NOT a good idea
http://www.holidaywatchdog.com/850-Marmaris-Baris_Aparthotel-Holiday-Review.html
|
okay, so the whole theory of the world ending in 2012... my opinion is that it's not gonna get completely swallowed into a black hole or explode or anything. but i do believe that something BIG is gonna happen.
i want your opinion . what do you think about it? i'm getting really curious about this stuff & why they even say it's gonna end. (link)
|
The world is NOT going to end in 2012, This is just a predicament from the Mayan calendar.
Will something big happen? Maybe nobody can predict what the future holds.
Will that BIG thing be that the world blows up into bits and there is no more life? NO, That seems a little ridiculous.
Don't keep worrying over something that isn't worth worrying about, The world is not going to end in 2012 this is just some silly crap people are talking about but lets get real it ain't gonna blow up.
|
|
How do i get my cat to walk on a leash? (link)
|
The same way you would train a dog, It's a working progress
|
|