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Sex, Gardisal, Mother, and black boyfriend
Is 19 too young to be having sex? Just a note I think premarital sex is perfectly okay as long as you're responsible.
The reason I am asking this is because I want to get my Gardisil shot, and my mom would know about it, and she believes that the only people that get it are those who are sexually active or will be in the near future.
I live at home (except I go to school out of state). What should I do when she questions my reasons for getting the shot? Should I tell her I'm sexually active and I want to protect myself? I'm just kind of in a tough situation right now because I have a boyfriend, whom I'm keeping a secret from my family (he's black, and I don't know how my family would react to that). I told my mom a bit about him, and that we are bests friends, and that yes I do spend the night at his place every once in a while but we don't do anything (which is a lie, but I figured my mom can just assume whatever she assumes).
Yup, so what should I do? Tell my mom I'm sexually active, or keep lying to her about it. I mean 19 isn't too young to have sex, right?
(and just a note, I'm on birth control and we use condoms, so no lectures). Oh and if it matters, he is 23.
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I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you may have received and may continue to receive from others.
You are 19 and considered an Adult by society. Whether or not 19 is too young or not too young to have sex is strictly your call. When an at what age people decide to have sex is a very personal decision but certainly as an adult you are not too young to engage in sex if you so wish.
As to the Gardisil shot: Here again you are an adult, this is your body. You do not need your mother�s permission to see your doctor and receive the shot, even if you are using her health insurance. Your medical information is totally confidential. The Health Information Privacy Act, HIPA, has severe consequences including fines and jail time if your medical information is released without your written permission.
My advice is: If you want the Gardisil shot, talk with your doctor. If your doctor feels the shot is right for you then get it. It is up to you if you want to tell you mother. You are an adult now; you do not need permission to see a doctor, to have sex or to date someone of your own choosing. Mom also has the right to be disappointed and to do as she chooses when she finds out if she finds out. I�m not suggesting that you lie to your mother even by omission. What I am saying is as an adult you have all the rights of an adult as well as facing the consequences of those rights as an adult.
Reply:Your medical information is something your mother cannot find out about it is protected by law. The only thing she can find out about is who your dating and if you are sexually active and this only if you tell her or leave your birth control pills where she can find them. As for dating a black man, if mom finds out; first it is really non of her business who you date or maybe I'm just to liberal. Second who says you will marry him, your just dating.
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look im gonna cut to the chase your 19 you should have sex whenever you want and be honest with your mother but... tell her about your boy friend tell her anything she wants to know. but why does it matter what your family thinks about black people you shouldnt care. if you really love him then you shouldnt care for teir opinion of him
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You are doing everything right.
You are 19 years old, You are protecting yourself.
No, 19 is not too young to have sex, You are an adult. It is your choice to tell your mother however keep in mind you are an adult and you are entitled to your privacy. You do not have to tell your mother anything, At 19 you are old enough to seek birth control on your own you no longer need your mothers permission. Also, at your age you can also date who ever you wish to date your mother has no control over it. I would tell your family about your boyfriend, If you plan on marry him someday he will be family sooner or later. Don't hide him from the family, Be open and be happy with your relationship.
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