i think that you should stop coming to me for advice when all you do is tell your friend madi that i need to stop getting involved when you are coming to me for advice and telling me to shut up.

well heres my advice :
if he cares for you and truely wants you, he'll take you back. talk to him, at least hang out with him instead of ur girlfriends i mean its bad enough you dont see him at all in school or anything anymore. youre supposed to have someone to love and hold and actually WANT to see them every moment you can. but thats not what youre doing. and you need to tell him how you feel.



-Melissa.

wow.. um. i deff. think that you should let him know how you feel, that its ok if he doesnt like you but you sortof like him but dont wanna feel wierd if he doesnt feel the same way back. and just you know, take chances, everything happens for a reason! and if he doesnt like you back, its alright, there will be other guys, and if he does, then great! i know .. its hard to tell someone you like them but you never know if he feels the same way and if he does then you'll never know. so just talk to him, tell him how you feel and that you like him, and if he doesnt then still be friends. and everything will be cool.


-Mel.

well .. i think that you should just give it a little time before you go after the new girl, because, if it was me, then i would be crushed ( after knowing i had a chance with a guy who liked me, but then found another girl instead ). but you should give it a little time, be friends with the girl and tell her you only want to be friends, and after a couple weeks, then get to know the new girl and see if you would want her more. because, if she has a guy in her head from a past relationship, there is a high chance the relationship wont work out, because she isnt over the guy yet. and trust me, i know what thats like, not being over a guy, and dating a guy that was totally into me, and then crushing him because i couldnt stop thinking about a past relationship. and if you really want to be with the new girl, then let the first girl understand that the age difference wasnt going to work out, stay friends with her ( you didnt say if you already are ) and just dont change how you act and everything or act all weird if you get a girlfriend, thats the worst thing when a guy all goes and changes. well hope i helped, if you need any more questions or help feel free to ask.



-Mel.

i think that you should get how the boy thinks about everything and if you guys can see eachother outside of school, [ plus summers coming up ] then it could work, if youre in love with him then you should tell him u still would like to be with him and see if it works out, but you know.. theres other things like him flirting with girls and you dont know it [ in school ] . but thats what friends are there for and if it doesnt work out that way.. then you guys shouldnt date. if depends how you feel and he feels and if it will work out, plus .. boys arent everything, and theres plenty other guys out there if it doesnt work out !


-Mel.

aw, well i dont think you should put yourself down, ever. some guys are weird and they like a girl for a certain reason other than her looks. like .. all the guys at my school go for the real tiny girls, and im not real tiny, and i dont get as many guys, and im talkative and fun too ! so it doesnt mean its my weight, and it doesnt mean your fat. it could possibly be that you are shy, and just dont go in the croud and be loud like some of the girls do, but you shouldnt change for guys .. be yourself, and eventually a guy will come along, it just hasnt been the right time for you. remember, guys arent everything! so dont stress yourself over them, it'll make things worse for you.


-Mel.

ask her how she feels, and if that's too hard.. then get your friend to ask her, or you'll be able to tell if she flirts with you and stuff like that.

yes, you deff. should still hang out. you dont want to let her think she did something wrong, and she'll prolly be more upset if she knows you wont hang out with her cause of her parents. you should talk about it with her, and if you still want to hangout with her, and she does too, you should. oviously you guys are friends and you said she has feelings for her? well, dont neglect her. so yea, you should get her opinion on it and still hangout, if its the best thing.



if you need anything else feel free to ask away.


-Mel.

well, i think that you should just tell him how you feel, your totally not ready for that, and you'd just prefer and feel comfortable kissing and stuff. not anything too far. and really, if he cant accept that in you, and thats all he [oviously] cares about if he gets mad or dumps you. and if he does end up breaking up with you, he wasnt worth it. a guy should neverrrr ever make you do something you're not comfortable doing. there are other guys, and even though this guy could be special, if he gets mad over you not doing more than making out, he seriously is not worth it. so dont worry about it at all !!


hope i helped, feel free to ask anything else, anytime.



-Mel.

we already discussed this. =[

wow, are you ok?? if you need some advice, feel free to ask anything !!!


-Mel.

well, if she says that she's not ready for a boyfriend, i think you should just let her have time off untill she lets you know how she feels. it wont be "too late". if she doesnt feel the same way, then she doesnt, she might end up having feelings for you, she could have feelings for you already but just isnt ready for a boyfriend in her life for some reason. you can't control how someone feels, and if another guy takes her then.. it doesnt mean you came too late or anything, she just felt a certain way towards someone else rather than you. never rush a girl into anything, or pressure her, thats the worst thing you could do, it makes them feel nervous and say wrong things, or just feel like their being pressured and you need to know immediately, which could come off as a turnoff. so just let her tell you if shes ready and make the moves, but dont act any different towards her or weird, cause thats how guys usually get, and will make herr feel strange, and guilty. any other question feel free to ask.



-mel.

well, i think because your not totally over the guy from sixth months.. then you should take a few weeks or maybe even a month or so off. you should just take a break from relationships so you wont screw everything up in the future relationships. because, if you go out with the new guy from school.. you will still be thinking of the guy from sixth months, and compare everything from the past relationship in the future ones, which will be horrible. so i say, give time off from guys, keep the new guy hooked but no too much, and find out what you truely want to do and who you want to be with, so you wont mess everything up and hurt a guy that is sooo into you. hope i helped, feel free to ask anything else!

well, if he hits you and makes you do stuff you deff. should reconsider. like seriously, if he's like that then he will probably be an abusive husband. you should talk to someone close to you or talk to him about it calmly, if he gets upset then ignore him for awhile, defend yourself, and fight back. possibly take a few weeks off and see if you miss him and truely care about him. well if that didnt help, im sorry, if you need anything else feel free to ask.



-Mel.

umm on AIM? AOL? chatrooms on aim/aol ?

what your experiencing is a broken heart. after a few days you were over it, but as the weeks went on, you oviously felt as if your missing her more now. i know pretty much how you feel, except i was imediately depressed and heartbroken. possibly, you could just stay single for awhile. it takes about twice the time you were together to get over a girl. you oviously care about this girl and shes something special to you. but she is with another guy, and if she still is, i dont really think you should interfere. especially if you try to break them up, because ur doing what he did to you - 'stealing' the girl and bringing sadness and a broken heart to the guy. maybe, you should tell her how you feel about it, and just become friends and talk. and after awhile, you could get another chance with her. oviously if she dumped you for another guy, she wasnt that pleased with your relationship with her. So, just talk to her, be nice and understandable, give her comfort and let her know your there for her. if you need any other help or advice, feel free to ask my column. thanks.




-mel.

considering that i am a girl myself, and i have 'friends' like this that i have dealed with that have done this to their boyfriends, i think she means it. i dont think she loves you all the way, but just extremely likes you and doesnt want to lose you. it was horrible that she got her sister to break up with you, and then went back out with you. just tell her how you feel. and after a couple weeks see what happens. shes probably going through alot, and she has mixed feelings about everything, but she doesnt want to lose you right now, this is when she needs you the most and find out what she really wants for herself and in the relationship. so just give it time, and get back at me ! hope i helped, melissa.

well. i understand what youre going through. i did too. my boyfriend told me the same thing, and some other shit and excuses. its not good to cut and starve though. it is not going to get him back at all. i think that you should just ignore him for a couple weeks. yes, this will be hard. but for me, i finally got the strength to ignore him even if he contacts you for a couple weeks. then start talking. tell him how you feel, one more chance. if not, i know this is hard.. but you will find other guys. experience, possibly make him jealous. and maybe, just maybe, your boyfriend could come back to you in awhile. you gotta stay strong and confident and not hurt yourself. it wont solve anything, or help anything but sympothy. and thats not what you want your relationship to be based on, sympothy and fear that you will hurt yourself more if he does something wrong. imagine how he must feel ...

Im melissa. Theres alot more to me then people see. i love to write, read vogue, drink coffee and tea. im thirteen and pretty mature for my age. i dont have a boyfriend. ask me a question and ill do my best to help.

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