Hey everyone,
My name is Kelsey and I am so glad you are reading my bio. This means you're interested in my advice. I am a straight A student and I enjoy reading, writing, playing soccer, excercising, hanging with my friends, and helping people with their problems, which is where you come in. I am on the newspaper committee and I plan to join it's academic. I hope to play tennis this spring. I am very friendly and fun to be with. I hope you enjoy my advice and ask me more questions dealing with your problems. I promise to respond ASAP. L8r
E-mail: kpearson91@yahoo.com
Gender: Female
Location: Charlotte Hall, MD
Member Since: October 5, 2005
Answers: 51
Last Update: July 17, 2006
Visitors: 5345
Main Categories:
Love Life
Work/School Relationships
General Sex Questions
View All
|
| |
|
im 15/f and ive read some of your advice and i can tell that youre good at helping people. i have a problem theres this guy that i know that has been my friend since we met last year and he listens to my problems really well. ive always thought of him as a friend until just recently when i started to like him more than a friend but i dont think hes interested in me hes never had a girlfriend and is more the "just friends" type. what should i do? (link)
| |
First off I'll say that I hope when you say "just friends" type you aren't referring to a guy who avoids relationships because of committment and rather screws around with everyone. If he is, DO NOT go for him. It will only end up in pain. If you aren't sure what I mean, ask yourself this. Would this guy feel up a girl or totally lead her on and then do the next thing to another girl the following day? If not, continue reading. I actually have had a friend go through the exact situation you are going through right now. First you must consider the consequences. If you admit your feelings, you risk losing what you describe to be a strong friendship. He could however admit the feeling is mutual and then you both live happily ever after. Unfortunately, this is not always the case. If you don't admit your feelings, then you avoid losing your friendship and feeling embarassed if he turns you down. At the same time, you risk taking it to the next level if he were to like you. I would suggest that if you value him greatly as a friend, do not make the move. Afterall, guys do have the tradition of making moves when necessary so make him make the move. If you really feel, however, that you would rather risk it to allow the possibility of you two hooking up, then go for him. As I said, it depends on your friendship. Good Luck and hope this helps! :) Feel free to ask for further advice if you feel I didn't totally answer your problem.
|
hi everyone its me kate! im back! and i need your help! so nikk (u should rm him if you read my last question) is telling me how he feels everyday and its wonderful but a lost love is coming back into my life. chris. he was my first true love and then he and i split up and i told him i never wanted to talk to him again and just recently i realized how i told him everything and ever since i stopped talking to him i became depressed so i told him i wanted to be friends again but now im having feelings for him again. and he keeps telling me how much he missed my beautiful voice and all that jazz. i dont know what to do because all ive ever wanted is him and now im getting him back but i dont want to break nikks heart. what should i do? someone help me im starving for answers!
much love (link)
| |
I didn't read your question you asked previously, but I still see where this is going, and I can totally relate. The solution is simple, but the process is not. I'm not going to lie to you, it's going to hurt nikk. You can't change that, but you can change how much it hurts him. The longer you try to pretend you no longer have feelings for Chris and hang with nikk, the harder it will be in the end for both you can nikk. I suggest telling nikk asap (as long as your sure you still like chris) and just say hey, I can't change the way I feel and I just am not feeling it anymore. I understand it's my fault, and I'm sorry, but we can still be friends because I like you. He's not going to be happy, but if you waste time denying yourself chris and you really like him, you're going to want him and want him till you have him, so you might as well get him soon. The only other solution would be to tell Chirs you have a bf and separate yourself from him. You have to decide Chris or Nikk, and then go from there by either letting nikk loose, or pulling him close and letting chris loose. Hope this helps and good luck :)
|
|
I am 13 year old boy in the 7th grade and I met this incredible girl over the summer. I had asked her out, but she wasn't allowed to date, yet I got her phone number. I still wasn't sure if she liked me as I liked her. Because as school came around I felt closer to her.I asked her out again during school, yet she still couldn't date!!!!!!! We have our last period together and we sit next to each other. Neither of us are very social at that time. I don't know if she feels the way I feel because I can feel this in no crush... I am in love with her. I need advice on when to ask, her where to ask her, what to ask her to, and if she can go how should I dress and what should I bring. (link)
| |
First of all, not to burst your bubble, but can she date? You might want to worry about that first before you ask her out. If she can, then I think you need to tell her a lot what you told me. Maybe send her a poem and do the anonymous thing if you're too afraid to be revealed right away. I'm a girl myself, and girls love a guy with a sensitive side who really cares about them. If you do ask her out, ask her during that period yall have together but make sure no ones around to sway the answer. If you're too afraid to ask her face to face, then call her. Considering you're only in 7th grade, I'd say ask her to dinner and a movie or just one. If she can go, wear something nice but casual. Trust me, she's not going to be too dressed up so it'll be awkward if you are. Also, this girl is really lucky to have a sweet guy like you so into her, and you're right, I think this may be your first love. Good luck and hope it goes well. I'd be interested to see how it turned out. :)
|
ive been in love with my boyfriend and hes in love with me for about a year now. but now were starting to fall apart, over the summer we used to hang out everyday now we hang out like once a month. and hes the kinda guy that flirts with alot of girls, but i trust him. yesterday i told him i was mad at him (because i was infront of him talking to him nd he was ingoureing me and ran to another girl) and he was like i dont care. that hurt alot... then today i was asking him why he said this and he was laughing about an inside joke. then he came online, and this was ower convo.
HIM: do you think its time time for a change?
ME: what do you mean...? 'change' of what
HIMME: no tell me
HIM: nvm
ME:k
ME: well your really acting like ur gonna break up with me... just get it over with if you r gonna.
HIM: jump to conclusions muchh?
ME: umm... well your acting like your gonna
HIM>: how does somone act like there gunna break up with somone
ME: they act like they dont like them....
hIM: well
>HIM>: do you wanna break up?
HIM: or take a brkeakk
ME: if i wanted to break up.. i would of broken up with you already....
HIM: o
ME: whatever
HIM: k?
ME: if your gonna break up with me then just do it now cuz im leaving soon...
HIM: fine
ME: fine what..?
HIM: uhh i dont no
then i signed off. but i dont no if i should break up with him, i love him to death and i really dont wanna break up with him. but it seems like were falling apart.=( should i? or no?
--confused.
** i rate high (link)
| |
I know this is hard to do, but it's time to let him go. You are absolutely right when you say the relationship is falling apart and from what I just read, it shows little to no hope of ever recouperating. The sooner you dump him, the sooner you can get over him and move on to someone who you deserve. Also, a word of advice, don't date guys who flirt with all the girls no matter how much you trust them. Flirting is showing his interest in someone else so how can you sit back and know your boyfriend is fooling around with someone else. Never let a guy do that to you. If you aren't his one an only, kick him to the curb. Again, I understand this isn't going to be easy, but getting him out of your life is the best thing for you. You need to find someone who deserves you cause I can sure say he does not. Good luck and hope this helps :)
|
|
My friend and I like the same guy and she made out with him in front of em so I was kind of mad but I got over it because I went and talked to her ex boyfriend.He got all mad at her because he said that was wrong of her to do that to me.But I told him I was over it and he is still mad and now she cant figure out why.Any advice on how she can talk to him with out getting him even madder.Ill rate high (link)
| |
Chances are, he's not only mad because what she did to you, but what she did to him. Remeber, he used to be her boyfriend so it's kinda a stab in the back to know she's making out with some other guy. Also, why do you care if he's mad at her? She tried to take this guy right in front of you, with yalls relationship on the line. She selfishly put herself first and left you in the dust. Don't worry about her problems, she deserves them. She should be on her knees that you aren't the mad one because if I was in your shoes, I wouldn't have gotten over it. Girls are not supposed to mess with guys their friends like. What ever happened to that rule recently is beyond me, but personally I think you should talk to her about that and worry about this guy later. Hope this helps and good luck :)
|
|
well on monday this guy told my friend that he liked me. i really really like him to. my face lights up and it just makes my day when he calls. sometimes i wait up all night for him to call, but when he does its totally worth it. anyways, tuesday after school i was talking to my friend paul. I told him that I like ryan. Its kind of a secret, but I think ryan already knows. So on the phone yesterday ryan really wanted to know what the secret was. I said to guess. He guessed that i liked him. Well that is the secret, but I was really stupid and said that it wasn't the secret. I really want to tell him because then mabye he will ask me out. I dont know if I should thought because it might make things akward. Do you think it will? should I tell him? (link)
| |
I definately think you should tell him because if he wasn't interested, not only would he avoid you, but he'd never guess if your big secret was a crush on himself because that's bringing on more in yalls developing relationship. Just casually say something like, 'I kinda lie about that secret' and then when he goes 'y, you like me?' say something flirty like 'maybe' and give him the eye and smile. He'll know and he'll almost surely make the move. Good luck and hope this helped. :)
|
|
Okay i like this guy who is in one of my classes and i like him alot but i dont know what to say to him since i am shy around guys i like!!!please help (i rate high) (link)
| |
Begin by making the step most girls forget, friendship. This way, God forbid he doesn't like you, you still get something out of it and you will wind up with a much better relationship. Just act friendly with a little casual flirt and as time goes by, up the flirt level abit. This way you not only take it slowly, but you have time to get to know him "real" well and you can be sure you like him before anything serious happens. Talk to him alot. Ask him alot about himself. Comment him on a shirt or something. Find out what he's interested and what yall have in common. Then, after awhile, if give him some stronger hints until he makes a move that says "I'm interested" or "I'm not". Good luck. Hope this helped. :)
|
|
this is the girl that asked u about the whole mike thing(about us hanging out and what not) but anyways i wanted to start out by saying thanks for the help..it meant a lot! but anyways i have another problem! well last night i talked to him and it went HORRIBLE! i imed him and was like this is a little weird and hes like yeah i know what you mean..so then i was like what do you mean, why do you say that? and he was like same reason as you probably, why do you? and i was like well all my feelings came back and he was like its just weird thats all (well if his answer was gonna be the same as mine and he knew that..i know..why was it totally different..doesnt make sense..dunno if he was hiding something or what) well then i asked him why he did it and he said i suck and i was like well why do you say that? and he was like cause i do i wanted you to stop me..i was like what the heck you wanted me to stop you from kissing me when you know i love you..it just didnt make sense to me..how could you seriously do that to a person? so then i was like do you like doing this to me and he was like no no no no no and i was like why do you? do you like me crying all the time? and he was like no actually i find it kind of annoying! so i was like you know what fine sorry for being annoying and sorry i came into your life ill just leave! well he ended up blocking me for like 30 minutes and took me off his friend on myspace! i know i reacted a little harsh but after him being like this for 9 months and even telling me 6 months after we broke up he loved me..it causes a lot of pain!ive told a lot of my friends i give up and im done cause i know i deserve better! but they keep saying we know he loves you, you can tell he just doesnt wanna admit to it! but no one knows but him! i told them hes not the one crying all the time but they said you dont know that..and i guess they have a point! i guess my question is what do i do from here? do you think hes playing hard to get or scared to tell me his feelings? should i give up or what? sometimes i just think it isnt worth it anymore! thanks so much (link)
| |
You couldn’t be more correct, he totally isn’t worth your time. Whether he likes you or not isn’t even the issue but rather the fact that he’s playing mind games with you. Playing hard to get doesn’t seem reasonable because he knows you like him and that’s only good to try to turn a girl on who doesn’t necessarily have the extremity of feelings as you do for him. He knows you want him, so if he wanted you he’d take you. Your friends are wrong and remind them when they get in a similar situation, “O, but he loves you on the inside”. Tough, if he’s too dumb to make it obvious and stop hurting you, then he’s a loser. You deserve a guy who gives back what you are giving. You want someone who’s as into you and as emotionally mature as you are. The more I read of your issue, the more I come to realize this guy may very well be trying to emotionally satisfy himself at the cost of you emotional stability. He seems like he wants “someone” and is trying to use you for satisfaction of having “someone”. Basically, you just need to move on and find someone who makes you happy, not sad. Believe me, any relationship worth being involved in should show you much more happiness than sadness. Hope this helps and good luck. :) And again, email me whenever issues arise, I enjoy giving advice.
|
*this may be kinda long sorry! but thanks for taking the time to read this*
*well me and my ex boyfriend "mike" have been broken up for 9 months now! we talk about once a day or sometimes every other day! we have hung out quite a few times..and this is where the problem starts
*last night he came over and picked me up at my house around 10! he lives like 30 mins away from me so the whole time we were driving he was just kinda flirting with me..like making fun of me and stuff! well we were going to his friends house to get him and then gonna go bowling but his best friend was there and he doesnt like me so we didnt go there..instead we just went to mcdonalds! he kept asking me if i wanted something but i said no! well he got something and while he ate we sat in his truck and just talked..he kept staring at me and i was like what and hes like can i not look at you! and he kept calling me turtle lip which is what he called me when we went out! well then we left and went to his house and i started playing with my hair and
he was like whats wrong? i was like nothing and hes like what are you thinking about and i was like nothing and he was like dont lie to me i know better..well i didnt wanna talk about it! so we get to his house and he undoes his seatbelt..he looks at me and goes do you think it would really work out? i was like i really dunno and he was like honestly and i was like i dunno maybe! well i told him i was cold so he moved the thingy in the middle up and came and cuddled with me! well he was rubbing my feet for a while and he knows i love that! then he layed his head on my chest and was listening to my heart beat! well then he looked at me and was like can i bite your lip and i was like why and he was like i want to so i was like sure..so he did..then he layed his head on my chest again and just stared at me and was like can i kiss you so i was like i guess so we kissed! and that happened quite a few times! he kept trying to hold my hands and hold me in his arms! well i got up for a sec so he laid in my spot! well i was like fine ill go in the back and he was like no lay on me so i did! the seat belt thing was in my way so i went to the back..so he came back there with me and of course we cuddled and ended up messing around! weve hung out several times before this and weve never touched eachother like that or cuddled/kissed or anything! well then it was 1:30 and his dad was like you need to take her home! ya it seems awesome i know..but heres where it doesnt make sense! today he was on AIM and imed him (he was away though) and i was like you know things are gonna be hard now cause i cant get over him at all..and he signed off so i was like what the heck! so i got on myspace and he was on so i was like whatever cause sometimes it just leaves it on! then again later i got on it and he was on it again but he wasnt on AIM so i felt like he was avoiding me! so i called him and was like why are you ignoring me and he was like im not im watching a movie ill ttyl so i was like whatever! and he hasnt been on AIM all day..sometimes hes not but its kinda weird! i dunno if its just me or if hes ignoring me! i guess my question is what should i do? let go or keep trying? keep in mind he is my 1st love but i have been trying for 9 months.. how do you think he feels? do you think he really likes me and is scared to tell me or fall me or what? ughhh someone please help me! thanks so much (link)
| |
At first when reading your question, I was sent back to the days of my x, Drew. It's really nice when there's a guy who wants to "cuddle" with you because it creates a very caring feeling. Until the very end I was all for you going back with him, but it does sure seem like he's avoiding you. I can't imagine that he's afraid because he seemed very bold that night yall spent in his truck. If I was you, I'd let him go because any guy who leads you on like that and then leaves you hanging is totally not worth your time. Plus, chances are if he's your first love, he's not gonna be the last one so go out there and find someone better. It may not happen right away, but when it does, the wait will have seemed totally worth it. If you still can't move on, talk to him and tell him what you just told me. Then, he may have some explanation, but I'd just advise you to move on, and I know it's not that easy, but the sooner you start moving on, the quicker you will "move on". Hope this helps and email me back if you stil need advice. :)
|
the guy i likes name is chris
and he likes me ALOT supposebly he is in love with me. But i only like him a little bit. But his friend Juan oh my green starz! he makes me fall head over heels for him . But i am scared that if me and juan hook up Chris will hate me . but chris is like super cool and i atleast want to keep him as a friend and i dont know what to do please help me. (link)
| |
I got you now. Sorry for the confusion. I definately see the problem and it's a little larger than just whether or not Chris will be mad at you. It also involves the "best" friends as you say they are. You could be the result of Chris no longer befriending Juan which is something you should consider. Maybe you could tell Chris exactly what you just told me. First off, does Juan even like you? You might want to make sure before you get involved in burning bridges. If he does though, I'd just tell Chris that you are into Juan and you don't want it to interfere with yalls friendship. Of course it probably will though, cuz when issues like this arise, someone's gonna get hurt even if it's just a little bit. By speaking to Chris first, he might not feel like you and Juan conspired behind his back and he may be more accepting than you'd imagine. He also may be less accepting. There's really no majic I can give you for this issue, but I can say the words that always hold true and that's "listen to your heart". Just tell Chris about it but no matter what you do, someone's not gonna be satisfied, your decision is whether you want that someone to be you or Chris. Hope this helps and good luck. :)
|
i really love this guy, my stomach gets all up in nots when i think about him..... what do i do...
THanx (link)
| |
Well, if you're really in love with this guy, there's only one reasonable thing you can do and that is to go for him. See if he's interested in you. Does he seem to stall so he "coicidentaly" winds up next to you in line? Look for little things like this. If you think he might even be the least bit interested, start playing your moves. Spend A LOT of time with him. Make it obvious you love him, but not too obvious as to scare him away. Remeber, guys are dumb as the day is long and sometimes it takes telling them the big secret before things click. Ask him if he'd like to go somewhere one day with like a few other friends and hang with him. Get to know him better and let him get to know you. Do little things like walking with him to class and stuff like that if you don't already. The best way to develop a solid relationship is to become solid friends, then it's almost bound to happen. This way, you both can be sure you like the other for more than just physical attributes. Hope this helps and good luck :)
|
|
k well theres this guy and he wrote me a note and put it in my locker but he didnt really write it his friend wrote it but he told him what to write and then today i was like "phillip you know i like you" and then he smiled and like held my hand for a minute then when his friend came he let go really quick but were not going out so u think theres a chance that we will go out? (link)
| |
I'd say there's a huge chance yall will go out as long as he can get over his obvious peer issues. That's the only negative to this situation, like especially when you said his friend wrote the note. So, if he asks you out, which I'm sure he will/ or his friend will lol, make sure to tell him that you want it to be just "yall" like you don't love it when his friend calls the moves. Otherwise, I say go for it girl and have fun. Hope this helps ya. :)
|
|
So I've been with this AMAZING guy for about a month, officially on Friday, the 14th. And Saturday its Sweetest Day, any ideas? I was thinking of something for both of the occasions. Please dont tell me to do a search. =) He is very creative and I'm not all that creative. Please just something creative/homeade or omehing that isnt pricey.(up to $30)Something that shows meaning. Thanks in advance, I rate! =D (link)
| |
I'm glad you realize the money isn't important, especially if you're already getting something after a month. I personally have always wanted to do this special suprise thing I read about in a magazine so I'll tell you and maybe you'll get some use out of it. First, find out his locker # and combination and decorate it. By decorate I mean something like red ribbons and maybe tape some candy and love shapes. Then, for the gift, grab a small box, cuz it's only been a month, and decorate the outside with pics of yall if you have any, and other things that yall can relate to. ie inside jokes, love pics like hearts, etc. Then, get any little gift, cheap, and place it inside. Hope you like it and hope it works. Tell me how it goes. Good luck :)
|
okay heres my PROBLEM:
im 13/f. i am practically in love with this guy, hes 15. alot of people say 15 isnt too old for me, but i am now worrying that he wouldnt look at me in that way. i need to go out with this ked, or else my whole life will be miserable. what can i do to catch his attention?
BY THE WAY!!!!!! - i ONLY see him on fridays. its for a club thing [CAP.]
SO PLEASE HELP ME!♥
(link)
| |
I can understand where you are coming from with the whole you're thirteen he's fifteen thing cuz my friends do it all the time, but rarely will a guy that much older pay attention to you unless you are giving him the goods, lol. Seriously though, if you think he's not like that and he might be interested, you should try to hook up "as friends" and then plan your next move if you think there's a chance for more. I wouldn't plunge right into cold water though, I'd take it slow because of the age difference. Well, good luck, and hope this helps. :)
|
|
I recently got back together with my ex boyfriend after being broken up for 2 months. I have a naturally clingy personality and I think that might have been something that caused problems in the past. It's not that I'm psychotic by any means, I just like a lot of attention. I don't want to screw this up again... so should I simply ignore my clingy disposition and play hard to get sometimes, even though I already have him back? If so, how should I go about playing hard to get, and how often? I think games in general are stupid but if this will help keep everything romantic and healthy I'm all for it. (link)
| |
I have soo much experience with your issue and I have experience from your boyfriend's side because all my x boyfriends have been "clingy". Please take no offense to any of this, because I want to help you so I'm gonna be totally honest. Clinginess is none other than annoying. This is probably why it ended your first relationship with this guy. Because of this, my first suggestion would be to do what I wished my clingy boyfriend had of done, that it talk to him. Tell him right out front, "Hey BF, I know I'm clingy, tell me your opinion and just tell me when it's getting annoying and when to back off". He may say you're just exagerating but if he does give you some feed back, then you know EXACTLY what he thinks is overboard. My other suggestion, in addition to the asking your BF, would be to keep a journal, or diary in which you write everything as if you were talking to him. This way, you get all your bottled up emotions that are leading to your clinginess of your chest and onto the paper. I'm very confident that this will work, and I wish you all the luck. Hope this all helps :)
|
|
i like someone but i know they dont like me what do i do (link)
| |
Well, this is a very popular predicament. I would suggest you try to attract them to you by all means necessary, or find someone who's worth you're time and who you deserve. Don't waste you're time on someone who doesn't like you because if they don't realize what I'm sure they are missing out on, forget them. Hope it helps, good luck. :)
|
|
ok...i really like this guy...abd he likes me too...he told me him self...but i think h is too shy t ask meout...what can i do so he will ask me out? or do i have to do it myself? lol thank you and i do rate...as long as you dont bull shit me! (link)
| |
I suggest you first give him some MAJOR hints and if he still doesn't ask you out, then since you say he said he likes you, go ahead and do the asking. Again, I suggest you making some extremely obvious hints first, however it's really up to you. Hope this helps. :)
|
|