Once I have anal sex and it didn't slipper to my vagina, am I still a virgin? (Stressed)
From a technical point of view even anal penetration is losing your virginity however I'm inclined to feel personally that virginity is largely up to the individual to define
The question I think you should be asking is
Do you still view yourself as a virgin or not
Really hope this helps you feel less confused and conflicted
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I've been in a relationship with a girl from overseas for almost two years. I'm a 26 y/o guy, and she's 24. She came with me here about a year and a half ago. I treat her well, romance her, buy her roses, bake her cakes, take her out when I have time, tell her that she's beautiful, help her look for work, and a lot with English.
Last year she started acting funny and talking about a guy, and I found out she cheated on me by looking at her phone, and reading her emails (Not saying this was right, just that I did it). I confronted her, but I never really felt she thought what she did was wrong. I promised not to look at her stuff again.
For the half year since then she's been using her phone a ton, and hiding it from me. Lately she has been getting calls and messages from the guy she cheated with on me again, so often that even though she doesn't want me to know, it's inevitable that I would see at some point. She gets pissed off over trivial things, she's stuck to her phone 24/7, we hardly ever have sex anymore, and sometimes I don't feel like she even wants to be here.
So I gave her time, and everything just felt kind of wrong. I broke my promise and checked up on her. She's still cheating on me, and things never really stopped. She tells me she's faithful, nothing has happened, and she loves me, but I know she's lying.
Recently she got offered her dream job in my country, and the contract process is happening fairly quickly. She's staying here on a Partner visa with me, and we live together. If I break up with her, she either has to leave within a month, or become illegal. Apart from that, it will obviously make my life more hellish for that month than it already is living with a person who you know is lying to you with a straight face, while making out with another guy. I know that she is planning to stay with me for the two years it will take for her to gain permanent residence, and then leave me for the guy she is cheating on me with.
In my country, you can only ever sponsor two people to be partners, and if your first partner is granted PR, the length your second one has to wait grows to 5 years, rather than just 2.
I don't know how to handle breaking up with her, and what to say to who, when. I don't want to be taken advantage of, or have my name smeared by this. Breaking up with her before she gets PR will pretty much destroy her whole life as she knows it. She quit her job to come here with me, which is kind of a black spot on her employment history in her home country. I feel angry and upset about what she has done to our relationship, but I'm still battling feelings of love for her, and I don't want to see her broken. I wish everything I know about what's happened could be a lie, but I know it's not, so I have to deal with it.
To complicate things, accepting the job involves costly medical and security checks for her, and may mean we consider moving. I'm at university, and I only just found this out, right before the exam period. I really don't want to think about this before exams, and I definitely don't want to break up with her just before my first exam, so I am putting it off, but I feel so guilty for "supporting" her through the process of getting checks and references for this job that I know will be difficult if not impossible for her to keep.
What would you do?
What should I tell her? The truth? Or that I've fallen out of love, but don't know why? Or that one of her friends told me the truth?
How do I deal with the stress of living together with this oblivious lying girl who tells me she loves me?
What should I do to handle the resistance that I'm likely to have to breaking up with her? She won't want to break up with me, because she wants PR.
Can you tell me some steps and the order in which I might do them?
Any other general advice about the situation that I haven't asked a specific question about is more than welcome.
Thanks in advance.
-Troubled
Wow umm
I always advocate compleat honesty in a relationship
Obviously she's not being honest but Maby if you take the furst step she'll folow.
You need to talk things through with her.why not sit doun and take time for a real heart to heart.
It's werth keeping in mind how vunrible being totely reliant on you may make her feel
I wish you both luck
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I am a 22 yr. old female who lives on her own in the US. I rent and live with my boyfriend of three and a half years. The guy I’ve been with has put me through hell in the last three years we have been together but I stuck by his side fearing that I would be alone. He has abandoned me several times even on our anniversary and I know deep down I deserve better. I go to school PT and I work FT. To give you a vague idea of what life has been like for me, I do everything- tend to his needs, clean up after him because he won’t clean up at all, buy all the food, he treats me poorly- has no consideration for my feelings at all, doesn’t acknowledge anything that I do, is jealous that I’ve got a better job than him, refuses to work FT, won’t help out at all around the house without complaining about it, he has no interest completing his college education, and now he’s asking his job to cut back his hours so he can play card games all day. I’ve asked him nicely to pursue counseling, offered to pursue counseling with him as a couple, and he is being stubborn about it. He thinks he doesn’t need it at all. He has been talking lately about quitting his job because he doesn’t want to be work for retail all his life, and recently, dropped the only class he was taking at college. He has Asperger’s so he sees the world a bit differently than you and I, but I’ll be damned, he’s very manipulative and super quick to create conflict if things do not go his way.
That said, I’m in a pickle and I’m growing very unhappy with him. My heart genuinely loves and cares about him and his overall well being but am I in love with him? I don’t think so. We don’t connect like we used to, I am not attracted to him anymore (been over a year since we’ve done anything sexual), and I do a lot of things on my own. I feel like he’s my child literally. Because his name is on the lease, I am reluctant to say how I really feel because I am worried it would create a mess of problems that I do not need at this time. I have been saving up for a down-payment on a house of my own and I’m very close to being able to get one. My goal is to drop him when the lease is up if things do not get better.
As silly as it is going to sound, I think I have found someone who I really enjoy talking to. I met him through eBay of all the places but we immediately clicked. We like almost all of the same things and we can talk non-stop for six hours. We have so much to relate to it isn’t even funny. He is attractive, a bit older, and he happens to live in Arkansas, which is very far away from New York, but I guess it could be worse. We are discussing meeting sometime this year presumably if all goes well. He seems like my other half and I get very giddy when I hear from him (sometimes anyway). Although I don’t know him as well as I would like to, I do have a strong gravitation towards this person and I’m not fully sure why exactly. Maybe it is because we are so alike. He is a college graduate and has been a dept manager at a retail store for five years. He was studying graphic design and has even done a few book covers for local authors. I find it impressive that he has done so much at his age. If you believe in Astrology, his sign is Gemini (air) and I am Leo (fire), it says we are highly compatible. He is highly skilled in many areas including photography and art. I could go on and on about how wonderful this guy is but I’ll stop it right there.
Anyways, I told him my disposition with my boyfriend a few months back and recently told him how I started feeling about him. I was scared to bring the topic up mainly because I wasn’t sure if he felt the same way but I also did not want there to be a relationship between him & I- at least not until I have successfully ended the relationship I am currently in and after he and I have met in person first. The more I have talked to him, the more I feel like I am falling for this person, but I will say this feeling comes and goes and fades away when he isn’t talking to me as much. I think I take it personal or something, assuming it’ll never happen and that he is not interested anymore. It sucks having a pessimistic mind. There have been spouts where this person just disappears for days and I grow concerned, I don’t understand why it happens and when I try to reach out, I don’t get any response back. He tells me there is something there for me but has forgotten the feeling of love. If you are genuinely interested in someone, you don’t do that to the person who has feelings for you.
Maybe my thinking is off or I’m taking way too much to heart so soon when I hardly even know this person. It has been a while since he has been in a relationship and while he has forgotten the feeling, what do you think this feeling could be? Did he just say that because he did not know what to say? Anyways, I can understand being busy but at least tell the person you are interested in or who is interested in you what is going on in your life so they know you are OK. If I stop talking to him, he does try to initiate conversations which confuse me. It seems the more attention I give him the more he runs away but the less I give, the more he comes back for more. He will on occasion send me text messages in the morning or call randomly to chat. And no matter how much that guy is on my mind or not, I do dream of meeting him when I am asleep even if he hasn’t been on my mind at all. I sometimes smile myself to sleep when I’ve talked to him and had a great conversation. But in these dreams, I am subconsciously trying to hide it away from my current relationship. I guess the conscious is playing a part. I’ve had maybe 2 or 3 dreams where I’ve come close to telling the person I am with now about this guy. I don’t believe in cheating and that is why I am stuck, I can’t move on until the relationship I am with is done entirely, but it seems I’ve felt alone for so long my heart is ready to love again. I’m worried of the situation altogether backfiring. I don’t know what to do. Do I have genuine feelings for this guy? Is this just a crush? Will it subside? Am I a complete nut-case? Am I putting things in my head that should not be there? Should I just stop talking to this person or view him more as a friend? What would you do in my shoes?
If i were in your shoes I talk to both have a frank discussion and though you may not be physically cheating neither are you being honest
To me the relationship you are in doesn't sound at all healthy and whether or not you enter a relationship with this other man you shouldn't forget the option to end your current relationship is still viable
Being alone isn't always a bad thing
I wish you the best of luck
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Its been almost 3 years and they have had there good times and bad times but today i didnt talk to her because I didnt want to fight and when we spoke she kept fighting with me... I feel like dying because she is my life and i am so stressed out, what should I do?
There is no way to solve your issues without talking to your partner
She needs to know how you feel and much as we might wish it at times our loved ones can't read minds
Wish you the best of luck
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can i get pergrant if my boyfriends fuks me frm bckside hole without using condom
Technically yes you can
However it\'s exceedingly unlikely as sperm can only survive for a short time outside the boddy
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I am nineteen and a freshman in college, and the guy i hooked up with for five months is twenty one and a senior at my college. Basically, we were inseparable and had been hooking up both not wanting a relationship and had always communicated with eachother. After hanging out for five months, I became very attached and he decided that the best thing to do for us was to just be friends. Ever since that conversation, we have been hanging out constantly, doing way move fun things together like dinners and football games and i still sleep at his house in his bed without hooking up. I am in love with him. We have grown even closer through being friends, however I am very confused. He told me he can't be in a relationship because he is not quite over his ex who he was with for three years and he wants to graduate and have a stable job before he commits to someone. He also told me that I am one of his best friends & that he has never started a relationship with a girl out of friendship. He also said that even if he met his dream girl tomorrow that he still would have no desire to date her until he was ready in a couple years. Do you think that he is keeping me close because he wants to be with me but just isn't ready yet? Or is he just keeping me close because he wants to be friends with him?
honestly i'd like to think he feals the same for you as you do for him but that's because i'm a hopeless romantick. still the fact he lets you sleap on his bed and not the couch or sleap on the couch and give you his bed alone gives the romantick in me hope. but when you get doun to it the brootel truth of the matter is that the only ways you'll fined out how he feals is with time or by talking to him about it.
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I met a guy at a school basketball game back in High school my senior year he had just gotten over a realationship with my friend but were still super close and he was visiting. He asked me to join him for lunch. So I did. We went on a walk and talked. I fell in love with him and learned a lot just that one day but that wwas 3 years ago. I met him again today and we ice skated he made me laugh and fell for him again. He visits his family here every year and he is visiting here. I've been seeing him tis whole week. We went to the zoo. I am a 19 year old model who travels the state my Dad being a Baseball hitting coach and everything I don't get much freedom. I wanna enjoy life as it is. He makes me happy. Anyways I have a photo shoot and it just so happens to be where he lives and all the way across the world. He asked me to stay with him and I agreed knowing i would be in trouble bit it's my life, right?Only for a month but i want longer. My friend dated him back in high school junior year. He's a good guy with a good history. So my question is: should I really spend a month with him? Do uthink he's not gonna be harmful? Im a virgin and i plan to stay that way till im married. Mean while this is big ... 2 years ago I was about to get married (yes at 17) because my parents wanted me to so when the wedding came i rejected and feel super guilty. U only live once.
What do u thonk my life is gonna turn up like? Should I stay or reject. What if he asks me to marry him(btw im talkin about the 1st guy now) i have only met him in person 10 times and when not we chat through facebook. I love my career but he's more important. Help. How do I do this?
i no this sounds corny but folow your heart. if you trust him and trust your judgement stay with him, if you love him and he asks then i'm sure you'll know what you want to say.
if you trust him but just think he might be expectting more than your willing to give why not explane wantting to save your verginitty till after maridge.
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Is the grass greener in the other side ?? It's hard to stay how many of you would leave someone you have been with for a 5 years for someone you have been with for 4-5 months and are madly in love with. The reason for the infadelity / affair is the way I was treated but if that person has changed should I
Still leave ? My boyfriend went from not caring and being like a roommate to being now madly in love with me - us it worth giving him another chance? Do I owe him another
Chance after 5 long years ??
the question you should be asking is do you still love him? if the man your with at the moment loves you that's grate if you love him but if not... well a relationship wont work if only one of you are in love. the other question you should ask your self is if you do stay with this guy would he forgive you for cheatting on him? because a relationship bilt on a foundation of lies is no relationship at all.
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My boyfriend is 30 and I'm 23. We've been dating for almost 3 years now and have been living with each other for a year. In the beginning of our relationship we would have sex all the time. Usually 1-2 times a day. Now we have sex maybe once a week, if that, and I'm the one who initiates it. Just recently he started turning me down more and more. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. He's making me feel unloved & unattractive. Is there a way to increase his sex drive? I don't want to have to beg him for sex...
you should neber beg for sex, it should be something entered in to by two loveing eaquely inthuseastick parners. mabie your other half neads a littel more spice to your sex life. why not talk to him about it.
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this girl i met 4 months. we talk everyday and i think im getting feelings for her. altough shes bestfriends with my ex girlfriend that now is my friend.
when we talked on the phone last night she told me "TE AMO" (i love you) and i got goosebumps i dont knwo how to explain this feeling or what em i having.
iwould like to know why i got goosebumps.
thankyou im 18 and shes 15
:d it sounds to me like you like her maby more than you've admitted to your self. why not tell her about the goosbumps next time you speak? if you and your x are now just frends she shouldn't mined you and this other girl startting a relationship.
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I'm having a hard time deciding wether or not my boyfriend is too controlling or if I'm my own worst enemy causing my problems. The problem is that I'm torn. On one hand, y boyfriend is super sweet, he's a stand up guy - one of the few, and I trust and love him. On the other, he's got a very strong personality and has non violent anger issues - his words not mine. He gets mad and annoyed over every little thing. It was never directed at me at first but after the first few months it started and now I feel like I'm always doing things so delicately, trying not to annoy him. And even when he misinterprets situations and gets annoyed with me for no reason, he never apologizes because he thinks he is always right. That's how he is and to me those are signs of a controlling person. He's very smart but dare I ever disagree or say something that he doesn't think is smart, he won't fail to point it out and make me feel bad. Again, not good.
Bu then returning to the good stuff he is sweet and does nice things for me and treats me well. Just that I want to go out and I like to dance and he doesn't anymore even though he did when we met and he repeats that he goes for me he continues to see friends and so social things for me but then when we do go he gets bored/mad and even though there's a reason for it (he has back issues and is in pain) it jus ends up putting me down. But then when I go without him with his friends it bothers him too even though he rarely admits it because he says that he was once able to do those things too but now he just can't anymore. We are both 20 and too young to stop having funbut he acts like he is 28. I don't know what to do because I loved him from way before he was like this and now I have this guy that swears were going to end up together and is amazing to me except for the fact that I am always tryi g to please him because his anger is inappropriate... Advice?
people often get short tempered with the ones they love. however it can be really hard for the people on the reseaving end of a bad temper. from what you have sed i don't think the situation is your fault. i surgest sitting doun with him and talking about how u both feal. if he starts makeing you unhappy it may b time to considder if the relationship is rite for u boath
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Ok so I'm a 15 year old guy about to be 16 and my girlfriend is 16 about to be 17 so she says she wants to have sex and I do too I feel I'm ready but the thing is we never get any alone time in order for me to see her I have to go to her house she never comes to see me and hang out with me so we never get alone time her 7 year old sister is always there bugging us or my girlfriend thinks someones gunna see because we're outside we don't have any privacy inside so we don't really mess around much but when we text sometimes its different pics go back and fourth and we talk dirty I don't just wanna say lets have alone time I actually want alone time but her parents are so strict on her when out comes to me I think I'm a good boyfriend we've been together got a year and 3 months and she still does go out much with me I know her parents they know mine and my while dads side of the family they're friends so is it me? Am Inot good enough? I try to make her happy I tell her I love her everyday at first she said its cuz they didn't know me but its been a year and 3 mouths they know me I need help/above what do I do? How do Iget alone time with her? I barely see her like 5 times a month how can I change that? Do u guts think she's not trying enough? Am I not trying enough? So many questions
the ugly truth of it is that many pairents never really see eye to eye with their daughters partners. as for never getting alone time with your yung lady it sounds to me like maby she's not as reddy as she might of thought. why not talk to her and remember if you do take that step b responsible
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Me and this guy have just started talking for like 3 months or so, but just recently weve gotton very close to one another. hes really sweet,he does basically everything a gentleman would do, he was never inappropriate and never crossed his limits.
now the thing is, he just broke up with his girlfriend a few months ago, and i just broke up with my ex boyfriend 5 months ago, we were both really heartbroken, we knew eachother back then but never payed much attention to eachother.I hear stuff about him from his best friend, typical guy things.. i heard he was like kind of over the top in his last relationship (controlling) but then when i come to talk to him, he talks to me about how much hes changed, and learned from alot of mistakes, ive heard things like him making out with this girl , or him flirting with this girl, so i dont really trust him that much.. now you see the thing is that, if were at the movies or in a cafe, hell start teasing me and like poking me , and id poke him back then hed hold my finger, then my other one, then my whole hand, and like intermingle our fingers together, and like the way he does it is SO affectionate, ever since we started talking i havent heard anything about him doing stuff with other girls, but i cant really know if it does or not cause i have no way of finding out. I dont know if hes playing around cause hes bored, or maybe he likes me and is on the rebound.. i dont know if i like him but all i know is that hes an amazing distraction and i think i may be falling for him, its a possibility. But how do i know the difference between him playing with me, or him liking me? if he was playing with me hed go farther, and he never did, i think holding hands is way more passion and affection. but i dont know if i should continue talking to him or not.. i tried moving my hands plenty of times but he just keeps trying (not forceful, but being sneaky about it) hes really nice and never did anything wrong to me,so i dont know if i should beleive what i hear or go with the flow. The way he tries to hold my hand, and like rubs my hands with passion is really cute and i dont really want to lose that.. so what do i do? :/ Im a girl, im 17 and hes 18 , thank youu.
men can b hard to understand at any time of life. a lot of women try to understand them just through inturpritting their behaviour and wont talk to the men in their lives wether it b through pried or fear of hurtting those who are dear to them. noone can read mineds so i think that it would b best for u to talk to this guy. people can change but they nead to be given the chance to do it.
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My Boyfriend Asked Me If Id Have Sex With Him Im 15 Years Old And I Kind Of Want To But I Want Some Advice. He Got Tested For Aids And All That And He Dont Have Them But I Just Want Some Advice
you're 15 so besieds it being aganest the law as you're not yet fully grone it will hurt more than it would if you wated. wen you are truely reddy you'll no, u wont nead advice you'll just no. my partting words of wizdom are that if u choose to egnor the rest of the advice and hav sex even though your boyfrend is clean from std's use a condom, other forms of contraseptive don't protect aganest pregnancy.
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