Hey yall! My names Madison, and I'm 17 years old. I'm a Senior in Highschool, and have gone through ALOT of events. I would love to take on your problems, or advice. I love helping others!
I am open to all most ANY type of question, so keep throwing them at me!
Gender: Female
Location: Eden Prairie
Occupation: Student
Age: 17
AIM: sweetpmb9008
Member Since: May 9, 2005
Answers: 35
Last Update: August 11, 2008
Visitors: 4044
Main Categories:
Work/School Relationships
Love Life
Friendship
View All
|
| |
|
i just asked that question below but i just found out hes going out with this girl but his friends say he likes me i just want to tell him but idk how nd i miss him more than anything (link)
|
ah i'm sorry! gosh! Men are the worst! I would still ask him what is going on. Thats the best advice i can give you at the time, sorry! Just gather confidence and either call him or in person, i think would be best. and just talk, try to just calm yourself down, and remember hes just a guy, you don't have to be afraid.
I know you can do it!
|
ok so i recently broke up with my boyfriend of 9 months. im only 13 and i dont know if im truly in love with the guy or not. i can't stop thinking aobut him but all my friends think i hate him but i dont. i really want him back but it would make alot of things worse. i cry alot becuase i really did care about him but i have no idea if he cared for me and i really miss him alot. whenever i see him it makes me miss him more. i can be stnding right next to him and miss him so much. so the other day at party he was there nd he kept looking at me with this sad face then turning away when i saw him what does that mean? when i left that party i felt like i walked away with any chance of letting him kno that i liked him. when we broke up i cried so hard and i still do he was my best friend and he just meant everythin to me. how do i get over him?
sry that didn't make alot of sense
thanks for the help (link)
|
Ah i'm sorry hun! Break-ups are the worst, expecially when you loose a good friend along with it. Well the tought of him will stay for a while, because you are so used to him being there. I think the best thing for you to get over him is to find some closure. Try talking with him, ask as a friend what went wrong, and express both views/sides. Let him talk, if he wants and then express how you are feeling at the moment. Remember by holding in these feeling, its not letting him see or feel them. Men arn't mind readers! ( even though I wish they were, life would be so much easier!lol). Once you are done expressing what you have to say, then you have to realize that is all you can do, becuase it's like a game of tennis- He breaks up with you ( ball is in your court)Now you are sitting here upset and sad, and confused on what to do. So like the game of tennis, hit it back. Ask questions! Its ok to, and its ok to let him know how you are feeling. Once you have done that, its all you can truely do untill he makes the next move. Be pacitent though, guys tend to be slow when it comes to feelings.
Best of luck, and I hope you feel better.
Oh and ways to get over him: ICECREAM allways does the trick, and just having a girls night, which incluses movies, snacks, and pampering!
|
|
ok so you know me but im not going to tell you who i am. So theres this kid thats been my best friend for a couple of years now. We've dated once before, about a year ago. I can honestly say its the only time in the past 4 or 5 years that ive TRUELY been happy. Whenever he gets a new g/f i get soooo upset that i cry. He knows i still have feelings for him and when i ask him if there might be a chance for us again he says, "no clue, but right now no." I try and tell myself to get over him because im wasting my life but theres just something about him i cant get over. What do i do? Do i forget about him? Do i wiat? I havent had feelings for anyone besides him in like a year and a half. And whenever i think i do, i always end up pushing that person away. Because i think as soon as i get close to someone else, he will start to like me and ill lose my chance. HELP ME MADISON GRACE! please, thank you, and i love you. (link)
|
hard situation dear,
I agree with you on wanting to move on, thats the only healthy thing to do. I wouldn't wait for him to come around, becuase knowing guys, the are VERY slow with realizing thing. Don't wait, if I were you, I would try as hard as I can to do things that take my mind off of this guy. Hang out with friends, good music help
I understand him not giving you a straight reply, becuase the future can't be told this early on. You might end up going out agian, and then you might not. I don't think he wants to hurt your feelings saying yes, or no. As for forgetting him, I honeslty don't think that anyone forget a speical someone. You won't forget him no matter how hard you try. With pushing the other guys away, i would try giving them a try, as hard as it is. You need to tell yourself that you and this other guy are over at the time, and you deserve to date other guys, you owe it to yourself. When it comes time to dating other guys, you can't compare them to the other guy, because no 2 guys are the same, and you will get no where if you always compare. Take the risk of actually liking another guy!
|
|
ok so im going out with this amzing guy but i have lost some rly good friends becuase of this. everyone says i should date someone else and tell me stuff that he likes someone else but when i ask him he ALWAYS says no thats not true and i dont kno if hes lieing or not...should i stick with him or no? (link)
|
Well if you have any reason to question him, then there must be a good reason to. I'm sorry to hear that you have lost some good friends. Was it becuase you were allways hanging out with him, or becuase they didn't want to be with you while you are dating him? Either way, I think I would first try and mend your problems with your good friends. They will be there till the end, and unfortantly the guy wont. With them telling you that you should date someone else, it might be becuase maybe they know some info about your guy that you don't know, and don't want to see you get hurt. I don't think they would just go around and say the guy isn't right for you, if it wasn't for a good reason. Ask them about it, and try to listen to their reasoning, and then inform them on all the good things about him. They might only be noticing the bad things, so tell them the good. If there is no good, well then obv. you shouldn't be with him.
When it comes down to it, you have to listen to your heart. You friends can give advice or their own say in the situation, but you need to make the finial call. Try weighing the pros and cons on the relationship. Or list the good and bad things about the guy.
Best of luck!
|
|
Hey Maddy...ok u know me but w/e i'm staying anonymous. My problem is that I have a guy that I met on New Years and we've hooked up a couple of times and even done things more than make out but we only get really close when we're alone and if we're around our friends(we share the same circle of friends) he shows no emotion towards me. But I really really really like this kid sooooo effing much! But I'm afraid he's just using me. And now for the real problem I found out another kid likes me and I like him too! This person is so sweet and we have so much in common, but I have a lot of things in common with the first person as well. So what do I do?!?! Do I find out if the first person likes me and then go for him or the second guy? (link)
|
First of all, If I were you, I would want to find out if this guy was using me. Next time your with him, ask him questions about how he really feels about you etc. Make him feel same, and unworthy. If he turns out to be genuine... then I think you should stick with him. If he turns out that hes a jerk, I would go with the second guy.
Either way, I would try and get to know both guys better, expecially the 2nd guy, becuase things might not allways work out with the 1st guy, and you don't want to push away the relationship you had with the 2nd guy.
Hope I helped
|
hey beaton! okay well here's my problem: so i have this great boyfriend who treats me very well but something is missing and i cant help but think of another guy! so i have this guy friend who im like BEST friends with! we love the same things and i can talk to him about everything and anything! he understands me and i understand him! i love our friendship and i cherish it very much but i cant help but want there to be something more between us! i really do think we would be amazing together! and i can HONESTLY say that i really do love him!!!!!!
whenever he tells me about other girls he thinks are hott and the first time he saw boobs (a couple of days ago, lol) i cant help but get jealous! i mean why cant he just like me like that and be interested in having a relationship with me! once a while ago i told him that i used to like him and all he said was, oh thats why you would always ask me about _________ (ex gf)! thats ALL he said! nothing else! im pretty sure he doesnt like me the same way i like him but i really want something to happen between us! i really do love him! and i know if that doesnt work out between us we will always be friends! nothing could come between us! i love him! (link)
|
I must say starting a relationship with a guy friend can be pretty tricky.. so just heads up.
Becuase you have a boyfriend, this makes the situation even harder to work with. You don't want to dump your boyfriend for something you dont know for sure can/will happen.
If I were you, I would keep it low, try the little things to get the one guy to notice you, without cheeting or feel like you are cheeting on your boyfriend. You never know, maybe he just wishes to become friends, maybe more. Just let fate take it part.
I hope everything works out for you.
|
|
hey babe... well you know me but and we are really good friends so you might be able to guess who this is. k, so i started going out with this new guy who i met through a bunch of my guy friends. we have a lot in common and he treats me very well! like a million times better than all my exs combined! he calls me every night and every morning, we talk on the phone for hours. sounds good right? well heres my dilemma, its only been about 2 weeks into our relationship and we've really only known each other for about 3 weeks (i know not long lol) but he already tells me how much hes in love with me and he could never leave me and he expects for me to say it back but i really want when i say "i love you" for it to mean it! not like how people throw the term around these days! i hate that! i dont know what to say to him and im getting close to saying it just to shut him up! also i feel attracted to him, or else i wouldnt be dating him, but not very strongly. i am an extremely open and sexual person but i dont feel like i want to be with him, which is really weird for me! usually im like having hookups in a weekend with 2 different guys (okay that was only once, and i was SINGLE)... i just dont know what to do about lacking the sexual attration where i just dont want to take my hands off him and i want to rape him! thats what i want and with him its just not there, but he cares a lot about me, hes a great guy, and he loves me! i just dont know what to do! thank you for your advice ahead of time! (link)
|
Guys are just tough ey? Lol.
I think you did the right thing by not saying "I love you too," if you didnt mean it. I agree, that term is abused way to often by people who don't know one thing about love.
From what I'm reading, he seems more into you, then you are into him. This situation is clearly normal unfortantly, I don't think I can recall a couple who loved eachother equaly.
Sometimes you meet a guy who is the complete package, and you find yourself not needing to reach out and indulge in your wantings. ( sexualy).
If you think you are lacking the sexual tention in the relationship, theres only two things you can do: 1) Make the first move yourself, nothing wrong with that. 2) leave him for someone who is willing to satify you. ( wow i sound like a sex theripest! lol.) You said yourself that hes a great guys, and treats you well, I wouldn't leave him, But I would let him know that your not quiet ready to say " I love you" back. If hes a great guy like you said, I think he would understand.
I hope that I made any sense at all!
|
|
Hey Mad! yea i'm 15 a GIRL! haha You've known me since you were born. ERIN yea baby! O well! i do have a mucho problemo! My best friend from mound broke up with her boyfriend a few days after school let out. well, i've liked her Ex since the fricken 5th grade!! i can never stop thinking about him. he's one of the greatest guys i've ever met. ok well my problem is...right now he and i are VERY good friends, we talk on the phone all the time and hang out a lot. many people think that we are dating! Well my best friend doesn't have a clue, and i have a feeling that we are going to start dating soon. everyone (who knows...only a selected few) think we will date soon! but actually the 2nd problem is that i THINK he knows i have a thing for him....but i really dont want to ruin our perfectly good friendship. Alright to summarize... how should i break the news to my best friend, and how do i get HIM to see how much i care about him without ruining our friendship? Help mad! I'm in a pickle! (link)
|
ERIN!
If I were you, I would have a chat with your friend, and tell her how you feel about this guy.
If shes a good friend, she will understand in due time.
I think that after you have the go ahead from your friend, I would try being more flirty, even you said you think that you two will be going out soon. Just keep up what you are doing.
Whenever you go out with one of your good friends, you are taking that chance of ruining your friendship. Friends can become more, but seldom does more become friends... But hey i could be wrong.
I would just show him how you feel with the little stuff you do or say.
|
Hey, I know you're only 15 and years away from this topic, but I thought I'd ask anyway.
I'm a senior girl in college (23yrs) and my boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 6 years now. We talked about marriage years ago and discussed our ideal time to get married. We both wanted to wait until we graduated from college.
I'm graduating in a few months and well... his college career has not been as successful. He has at least 3 years left.
Recently a lot of our friends have been getting married, engaged or have begun looking at rings. I'm totally jealous! These are couples that haven't been together nearly as long as we have and I feel like... I feel like it's my turn, not theirs. I'm te one who's put the time and effort into a long term relationship, it's not fair.
I've talked to my boyfriend about it, but he doesn't want to rush things. When I graduate I don't plan on staying in this farm town, but he wants to finish out his degree at our school... what do I do?
I want forever right now. It's my turn. (link)
|
Getting married is a life long commitment, and surely not something you want to rush into.
Do you want to get married just becuase everyone else is? I could understand the jelously, but more then likely the couple that rushes into marraige has the more problems.
Marriage is all about sacrafices ( sp?). Everyone has to sacrfice things, either you scacrficing 3 years of your life, by staying in your home town. Or him scacrficing finishing college.
I would sit down with him and have a long talk about both of your futures. You might feel ready for marraige, but you could be wrong. Figure out if this is the man you wish to spend the rest of your life with.
Marraige is not something you should rush into.
I wish you the best of luck
|
|
ok well im 15 and female and i really like this guy and he told me he likes me to....but whenever i ask him to hang out he says hes busy...and its really obvious that he is lying becuase it is all the time!! and i have caught him a couple times lying...and he always asks me for pictures..like not sick ones just like pics of me..and I don't know i feel like he is just pretending to like me to get action from me? sometimes it seems like he really likes me like he will say "i love you" before he leaves but other times its like he has better things to do to even say hey to me? im sooo lost idk i really like him..all my friends say i can do better but they dont understand theres just something about him that makes it so i cant be mad at him? got any advice for me? (link)
|
Well you said it yourself, He's not a loyal person. If he's lying to you now, do you think he's going to change in the future.
Loyality, trust, and communication are key in any relationship, if its a love one, or a friendship. If any of those are lacking, then at one point the relationship will take a bad turn.
I agree that guys are very confusing at times, if I were you I wouldnt go a throw my heart out at this guy, but insted play it low. See how it all works out, maybe he can be a nice guy, but only time can see.
I hope I helped.
|
|
i liked this guy for awhile for awhile and i thought if i wen tout with him id be like "happy" u could say casue i was like REALLY sad about breaking up with this other guy cause i don't know how to put it i REALLY REALLY like him! like when we broke up i cried my self to sleep and when he started to go out with this girl i cried that night cause they don't even know eache other and she didn't know ONE FRICKING thing about him! and it bugged hte crap outta me but now there over so i really don't care..anywho i thought i would be happy when i went out with this other guy cause when i go out with the other guy im like SUPER happy! like soo happy its not even funny!and then when we started goin gout i wasn't really happr i still missed the other guy and i still liked him and then i kinda got over him and then now im starting to like him again and i really don't know what to do cause i can't talk to my mom about and my brother doesn't get it at all..........................................................................................so now im really confussed what should i do? (link)
|
Well sadly, theres not alot you can do. These are emotions you are deeling with. I can tell you really liked this guy, and it takes time to get over a guy, if ever. Going out with another guy covers up the feelings you had before, but as allways, those feelings will come back unfortantly.
A Breakup is like a new scar, it was slowly fade away, but the mark will allways remain.
I dont think that anyone truely gets over a person, I think they learn to live with out them.
To try and keep your mind of the guy, do activitys that involve thinking, like sports. Or hang out with your friends, they are allways there to confert you in your times of need.
I hope you feel better, and that i made any sense at all..
|
|
hey I'm jr. in highschool and i play baseball. recently i have been finding about myself that I am attracted to the same sex. I'm not a hornball, but its strong enough attraction that I know that I am gay. I am so afraid to come out to anyone or do anything about it. But it makes me unhappy to not beable to express how I feel to anyone. I've tryed telling my mom, but she said it was just probably a stage I'm going through and she doesnt think I'm seriouse. also I play baseball right? And I dont know if its the same at your school but baseball players or anyone that plays varsity sports, cannot be gay, because of the reputation that they have. There the strong cocky jocks, and if any of my good friends found out I was gay... they would freak out and look at me differently, and i dont think i could live with that. I'm very much NOT attracted to anyone on my team or anyone that i know is straight but I dont think I could get that point across to the guys. (link)
|
Well I'm sorry you are feeling unhappy and afraid, those are the worst emotions.
You could very much be going through a stage at the moment. I think alot of teenager go through a "Bi-curious" stage. It could also mean you are gay. If you truely think you are gay, it takes a alot of courage to come out and announce it. It takes some people years to come forward, but they eventually do becuase they dont want to be ashamed of who they are. I think when you are ready, sit your mom down, and tell her how you are feeling, with out her intrupting. Then let her speak on what she thinks. With the friend situation, I think that would be the hardest, because teenagers can be so mean. If or when you come out to your friends, let them know you dont have feelings for them, but you wish that they still value your friendship, and hope things are not going to become werid in the future. Knowing most guys, they would get scared or weired out by this situation, which is tough. But you find your true friends in times like these.
I dont completly understand the baseball situation, I think your sexuality should have NO SAY what-so-ever in what sports you play. And if they kick you off the team or whatever, you could easyesly sue for harassment.
I hope you find what answers you are seeking, and that I helped you out somewhat.
Keep me up-dated with your choices
|
|
Hey. I'm a tenth grader at Eden Prairie, ( well since seniors are pretty much gone I consider myself a soph ), and got this site from one of your good friends. I've seen you alot in the halls but never been formally introduced. Anyways, I've always thought about girls and fantasized 24/7 about sex. But last weekend I was drunk and this 16 yr old hollister model, his names Ryan from Edina, ended up taking advantage of me because I was drunk and gave me head. This was at a party I went to with my cousin in Lakeville. The thing is, I wasn't drunk to the point where I didn't remember it. I just kinda layed back and didn't stop him. I knew what was happening but I was just too drunk to really care. I've never really been curious about guys and when I was presented with this option, I didn't pass it by which scares me. Does this mean I'm gay, bi or straight? I'm real confused and told a gay guy my situation and he told me he thinks I'm straight, but if I wasn't worried about it, I wouldn't have the balls to ask you this. Please give me the best advice you can. I know your a sophmore too, but I heard girls minds develop faster and you seem pretty good with helping people. Please give me the best help you can and don't leave anything out because I can't handle this without a second opinion, Thanx Mad (link)
|
Well I understand your confused, I think anyone in your situation would be. Actually I think alot of teenagers have come across a situation similur to yours at one time in their lives.
You said you find women attracted, and have never pondered on the topic of men right? Well I think that might answer your question. Keep in mind that you said that you were drunk that night. Even though you knew what was going on, I still think that the drinking could have impared your judgement.
If you ask anyone in this school, I bet more then half had said they have kissed or some something with the same sex, either as a dare, or they were going through a Bi-curious stage.
From what you are telling me, I would consider yourself straight, becuase you said you find women attracted. Maybe the reason you let it happen was becuase your judgement was impared, maybe it was becuase it was something new to you. Either way, I think only you can truely answer the question you are seeking, sure you can get imput with others, but I think you know the answer.
I hope I helped somewhat
p.s( I'm actually a freshman this year, will be a soph next year, actually in.. 6 something days! wooo hooo)
|
|
ok this guy asked me out yesterday and i said yes...my friend will be fricken pissed at me when she finds out im datin ghim casue she hates him..how do i break the news? (link)
|
Hmmm thats a tough one..
I think i would mention it to her for sure, and ask how she feels about the situation. Tell her you really like this kid, and your happy. Ask her if she could put her feelings aside, and be supportive.
If she takes it the wrong way, give her time. She will come to her senses soon enough.
Best of luck
|
|
Ok so me and this guy were fooling around and he wanted to have sex and i said no but he put it in anyways and i just let it happen. Was i raped or not? I told him no, but then i didnt really stop him after it happened...and now i might be pregnant?! what do i do?! im only 14! (link)
|
It is rape if you said NO. Once he is going agiasnt your will, it is considered rape. Its rape if you said NO 1 time, or 1000 times, its still rape.
The whole pregent issue.. have you missed a period yet? Or are you talking about being worried in the future. Well i would advice you to go and get tested, but if it happened recently, i dont know how quick you can get accurate info.
But most of all, dont go through this by yourself. Its one of the hardest things you can do. Tell a family member, a teacher, or even the police. Those people are out there to help you. Ask for help, its the smartest and safest thing you can do. I wish you the best luck, and please keep on posting with more questions!
I'm here for you if you need me!
I hope for the best
|
|
ok so i really like this guy and hes like my best friend but the thing is he already has a girlfriend! he knows i like him and he said that he likes me too but he likes his girlfriend more! we flirt all the time and talk and stuff but he always ends up saying something about how he and his girlfriend are perfect together and how he hopes they will last a long time that breaks my heart and makes me feel like ####! i dont understand why he does this...should i say something to him or just let it be?? what should i do?? (link)
| |
Hm thats a hard question.. Well clearly if he has feelings for his girlfriend and you, means hes not to dovoted to just one. Which might end up leading to problems if you do go out down the road. He's your best friend you say, well then i wouldnt urge him to leave his GF, becuase hey friends dont just go and do that. If he thinks that you 2 should go out, he would leave his gf and go to you. Now when you are togehter and he brings up how hes loves his girlfriend so much.. say something about it, be like.. "If you love your girlfriend so much, then why do you say you have feelings for me?" let him be the one to explain his feelings, and dont you try and analize them yourself. I wish you the best of luck tho!
|
|
how do you know when its over? (link)
| |
What exactly do you mean by its over? Over as in a relationship wise? I dont think its ever truely over, i think you just learn to live without it in your life... which takes alot of time... time and acceptence...
|
|