I'm just the girl next door. We all have a story and everyone needs some advice from time to time.
Location: Midwest
Age: 40
Member Since: May 26, 2010
Answers: 31
Last Update: February 15, 2012
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Hello my name is Jaisa and im 12 years old and im having love life problems...Me and my ex-boyfriend are friends but he has a girfriend now...me and him got together May 5th,2011 and broke up five months later.When we were together we loved eachother-well I loved him-and i got to meet his mom.My friend had a party in november and me and him were broken up...but he came and his girlfriend wasnt there so i got a crazy and there were couple dances and we started grinding and flirting and i asked him"If you didn't have a girfriend would you kiss me?" and he said "Yes.".
and just yesterday in our last period of school-hes in 6 of my classes-we were flirting and playing around and we made the eye contact thing and we just stared at eachother until someone walked by...Does he want to get back together with me? (link)
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Sorry this answer is so late, the only way to know if he really wants to get back together with you is to ask him. Being honest with him and asking him is the only way.....if he says no..say ok then you really need to stop flirting with me because I do wish we could be together and if that isn't what you want them you need to leave me alone so I can move on.
I wish you the best and stay true to yourself always
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My fiance mention, for like the third time, that he would like to try new things in the bedroom. His main interest seems to be on a threesome, which is something that he knows I have done in the past. The thing is, I don't want to share him (that's why I commited to him, because before him I only had friends with benefits) and I've told him how I feel. Knowing that he wants a threesome makes me feel like I'm not good enough for him, and like he doesn't really want ME. Am I overracting? I do understand that he has only been with me, maybe he wants to experience someone else... or experience the things that I did before meeting him. I really would like a possible explanation on why he would ask for something that he knows bothers me to even think about. (link)
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The only person who can answer why he wants to do something is him. You need to ask him and let him know that you really don't want to do that and why you don't want to. It will help you both to learn to talk about this kind of stuff.
Good Luck
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Okay so me and my bf saw eachother tonight and had a great time. He told ke when I was leaving that he liked seeig me alot and was happy he cld see me. We hugged and I left: (we haven't kissed yet so that's why we didn't do anything else) but he texted me and this is our conversation...
Him:hey
me: hey did you and ____ ( (link)
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Hi...
Just sounds like he wasn't in a texting mood. Most guys don't like texting or talking a ton in the first place.
I can see where you might think that there is an issue, but I wouldn't really worry about it unless he stops talking to you after this.
Good luck!
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Okay. See here's the thing. I used to be such a stubborn independ, strong willed girl. You couldn't tell me to do anything, I was crazy. But when I started dating this boy. I think I let him change me... And I think I know the night it happened. I was hanging out with him one night and we were kissing, normal stuff. But then it started getting kind of hot, like I started to press into him more (we were laying down on the couch, I was on top) then he pulled me down so he was on top and started to press into me even harder, it almost hurt. He stopped for a second because I was hesitating now. I apologized and reminded him this was the first time I've ever been this physical with a guy, cuz he was my first boyfriend. He said it's okay and kept going. He started putting his hand down my pants and I pulled it out. A few minutes later he put it down again and I pulled it out. He put it in a third time and I knew, I knew it was wrong for him to keep doing this but somehow I also thought it was okay... I can't even explain it. It's like I shut down and just let him. I let him finger me. Then he stopped and I didn't even notice it but I had started crying. I don't know why I couldn't tell him to stop... I wasn't scared I was just like lost... completely zoned out. I don't know. He didn't notice I was crying and we kept going. He then proceeded to put my hand in his pants and I pulled it away. He asked me for a handjob and I said no. He told me it was okay. The next time we hung out he pulled down his pants and put my hand... well you know where. I started giving him a hj. I don't know why I couldnt' say no!! I started to cry though and we stopped and he hugged me, I just told him I didn't want to go so fast and he said okay. Except everytime we hung out he continued to finger me. When we hit six months I knew something was wrong. It was like this kid had sucked all of my strength out of me. I wasn't myself anymore. And when he asked for a bj I said no but like usual the things he said to convice me stopped seeming ilke convincing and started making so much sense even though I knew it was wrong. He told me things like "it's been six months, I finger you and it seems like that aspect of our relationship is completely one-sided. you should be comfortable enough to do this for me." and I did it... I was shocked with myself. I couldn't believe I was fourteen and doing this. I started crying after but he held me and told me it was okay and that he loved me and I believed him. He could tell me anything and I'd believe him. I don't know how our relationship got like this. Anyway, he dumped four days later. Its been two months since the break up and I know I'm stronger now. But I'm scared to trust myself with liking a guy again. I HATED how pathetic and used my ex made me feel. I HATED being his little slave. I don't ever want that again... I don't know if I can't trust boys or if I can't trust myself... I don't know what to do. How can I get back who I was?? (link)
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Oh sweetie, my heart goes out to you because its hard to say no to someone that you really like. You are very young and these are all first's for you. While you said no and he talked you into doing things you weren't ready for. Its hard at this point to know the difference between curiosity and reality. It normal to wonder about what people do together and there is a lot of peer pressure to do more and when its coming from someone who says that they love you....it makes you doubt yourself. Don't beat yourself about what happened. See it as a learning experience and now you know what your limits are.
Trust yourself!! Trust the person that you know you are. Its easy to try and be what you think someone else wants you to be, but stay true to yourself!!
Getting back to yourself? Everything we do and see and say changes us, take what you have been thru and be the person you want to be. Trust yourself and know that you have the right to say No and you have the right to change your mind about anything.
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Why do all the weird not very attractive girls get boyfriends? I'm in high school and it seems like all the guys like are these annoying girls. They are not even pretty. I just don't understand it. I feel like I'd I have to act differently to get a guy. Seriously, why is this? (link)
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the pretty girl sometime doesn't get the guy because they think you already have someone.
Also its not always about what a person looks like its about the person that you are.
Be yourself and the right guys will notice.
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Okay so it all started about a year and a half ago! I had just gotten suspended from school for the rest of the year because of fighting. My friend Mariah had ran from her group home and I joined her. After our first night on the run, we were introduced to a couple people, one of them being the boy I would fall in love with, Jason! I can replay the first moment I seen him with perfection, as if it just happened. Here came this loud, adorable boy in his dickies! It was an instant attraction! That night me and mariah stayed at his house and me and him stayed up all night.(justkissing) Did I mention we were EXTREMELY drunk?! Well the next day when I woke up laying next to him, I pretended like that night never happened, even though I had major hickies. He tried so many times to talk to me and until I was again drunk that night I blew him off! Then once I was drunk we were more 2gether, it was crazy! THEN this guy we call "blackboy" came and I found him extremely attractive, and considering how drunk I was I was completely open about that feeling! That night I had sex with him in jasons room! Long story short:: next day Jason was pissed at me but then we talked ALOT and made up and I had sex with him that night, and the next day I left and didnt see him again for a while!!!!! ......About A Month Later..... So i was no longer on the run and my birthday was coming up. And without saying I wanted to see him I was determined to make sure I spent my birthday with him, and I did. That night is the best mmemory of my life, and the night I fell in love!(July10th2009♥). We did not have sex that night but we went on a super long walk together, and spent an AMAZING night 2gether>>WITHOUT SEX!! ..The next day i went home!! .....2WeeksLater.... So I was going to hang out with my friend mario and his homeboys and we were gonna drink! well I got drunk and had sex with 2boys that night! they were cousins, and Jasons good friends, and he showed up the next day. He freaked out on me then left, and about an hour later came back and wanted 2 "talk" and spend the day with me.We had sex that night. If i went on in detail about it would take me a century to write about it BUT our relationship mainly consisted of me sleeping with his friend, him cheating on girlfriends with me, fighting, sex, alot of great memories, and in the end him hating me!!
Now here's my dilema! I put myself in rehab for three months FOR HIM! I cant deal with him hating me. We havent talked in almost 4months. Ive been working so hard to turn my life around for him. AND today I find out he's going to be doing 6 to 8 years jail time for being a look out for a shooting. I LOVE HIM!! My anxiety litterally is hurting me! Please dont give me advice on how, "I dont know what love is" or "What we had wasnt love" or "how to get over him" I NEED advice on how I can work things out with him if i write him or I need to know hotline numbers to talk to someone about this kind of thing.
When you give me advice just consider that i am an EXTREMELY determined girl who is in love and not even slightly considering giving up!!! (link)
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This is free advice...so its as good as what you paid for it :)
If you are determined to stay with this boy and you love him, then let him know, send him a letter/e-mail/text and tell him.
Also now that you are thru ReHab and your working your steps think about what you want. What are you going to change to make this relationship work and let him know that.
The past is the past you know what you did and what he knows about and you need to find out if he does want to be with you.
Ask yourself this...are you willing to wait around for him for 6-7 years if he goes to jail? Are you willing to stop seeing other guys and only see him?
You are the only person that can answer those questions.
Again this is free advice take it or leave it...don't complain about it
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Me 13/f
him 13/m
I have posted ALOT of questions on here so if you feel like reading those, just go to my page or column or watever. Anyways here's the story.
I am IN LOVE with this guy. He is my best guy friend. We live three houses away. So I hang out with him somtimes. I've even been inside his house. We always walk home together. Lately on our walks home he has been "touching" me. It's mainly my butt but he's started touching my boobs. I always move away and call him a pervert. Bt he asks me if i want him to stop. And I just don't say anything. Bc if I tell him to stop then he'll think I don't like him when I do. So a few days ago we were testing and I asked him who his crush was and he said this other girl that used to be my best friend. We arnt enemies we just barely talk anymore. But she has a boyfriend. Then when he asked me who I like I told hi
that I liked him. Then he said he had to go. Then the next day he asked me if I wanted to go over to his house and have sex. So I said that I wish I could but I was at my grandmas. (we were just messin around. I am waaay to young for sex.) and he told me to prove that I wanted to and I asked how. And he told me to send him a pic of me naked or come over. So then I told him no and we had a huge convince abot that. Then he just stopped textin me. And now everytime we text, he barely says anything. So my question is.......what's going on. Does he like me or not. (link)
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No he's not interested in you for a relationship but to see how much you will let him do. When you told him that you liked him he already knew that and then just used that information to see if he could get you to do more for him. You never have to prove your feeling for someone. Don't let guys start telling you that you have to prove how you feel by doing something sexual.
He lived close to you just tell him that you want to be friends and if he gets cranky about that then he really isn't someone you want to have as a friend.
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hey im 16 and im a male, girls.....this one is for you, is a guy being to nice to you a good thing or a bad thing, nice to a point where hes a real gentleman, opening doors for you, wlaking you to the door step, paying for your ticket and maybe sometimes dinner, depends on the occasion, is that a turn on or turn off about a guy, i thought it was a turn on??? (link)
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Being a gentleman is a lost art that people forget is something that men use to always do.It is a form of respect a man gives to a woman but opening the door and walking them to their door. Opening the door for someone and walking them to their door is a wonderful gesture, just don't make it creepy by saying something rude.
If you are on a date, this is a wonderful thing to do, but some girls don't really understand that you are showing her you care enough to do these things. Paying for dinner/event ticket will depend on if you asked the girl on a date. If you are just friends with a girl this is not ok to do.
In order to 'turn on' a girl, be yourself and the right girl will love all the wonderful things you do!
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Any chance of getting pregnant by getting fingered? With the guy being fully clothed?
Sorry im just very parinoid with this stuff..DX (link)
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No chance
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Im 16. female. my friends have bfs. its killing me because i have been practically begging for one. im not desperate though, i mean i have standards and stuff. my friend calls me picky and i know i wont be able to find a perfect guy...but i dont want a perfect guy, just somone who is perfect for me. i just want one so bad. it seems like a juvenile problem i know, and i know i have plenty of years ahead of me for that but this yearning wont freaking stop! i want someone to love me and make me feel special. but there is no one around me that i want. so...i guess what im trying to ask is either how to get rid of this empty feeling i have and depression, or something. i dont really know. (ps. ive been asked out before. ha i kinda made it sound like no guys have ever liked me but they do. i just havent liked them back. (link)
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You are not alone in wanting to have someone in your life who is special and who is into you and you are into. However this will happen when you least expect it to happen.
You have to figure out what you don't like before you know what it is that you really like. I always thought I wanted someone who did what I do and was taller than me and was jock and not into hunting and fishing and all that. However I went out with the guy that I'm now married to. He isn't what I thought I was looking for but he is the perfect person for me.
So go out there and meet all sorts of guys to find what is your 'Mr Perfect'.......go have fun with your friends and don't settle for anything less that what you deserve.
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I have an ex that im still crazy in love with.He obviously broke up with me..because he said he stopped liking me as much as he did in the beggining. We still talk and hangout ALL the time.Once in a while alone,but most of the time we are in a group. We get along so well still and always have fun times together.He even told me he hangs out with me more than some of his best friends and the same goes for me too. When we first broke up,he made a few attempts to hookup with me and made a small attempt a couple weeks ago.We sometimes fight though and then he gets mad at me and it usually results in him saying "im not your boyfriend anymore so stop acting like it!" so i feel as though he gets the vibe i still like him..yet whenever we go to parties,im usually flirting with lots of other guys,in front of his face. We never ever talk about eachothers hookups,or if we are talking to any other people,or anything about love interests etc. so thats good but I cant continue hanging out with him if we aren't dating.He's become routine in my group of friends and it's almost hard to avoid him all together.When we dated,we mixed our groups of friends into one big group and now we are all close so i dont know what to do! I was going to write him a letter about how i feel and tell him i can't talk to him anymore and maybe then he'll either realize what he had when im gone,or we will just separate and hopefully ill get over him.help! (link)
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sounds like you both don't know what to do now that you have stopped having a romantic relationship. It is possible for the two of you to be friends but it will take time and you need to basically get past the romantic part. Take some time for yourself and remove yourself from the group for a bit. Stop talking to him all the time about everything and doing everything together. You have other friends you can spend time with and talk to. Then see how things are.
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