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Gender: Female
AIM: MessyGirl12345
Member Since: September 30, 2005
Answers: 51
Last Update: June 23, 2006
Visitors: 4449
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To preface, I came across this site because I did a search for someone that has passed on and found out thatthey used used to have a column here.
From my prespective, she and I had a special time together almost ten years ago. She was two time zones away yet we would be in touch everyday for a few months. I realize this is only a short time, yet I had initially ended it.
In the shortime thereafter, she and I would keep in touch and then because I acted stupidly with words she and I would not converse less and less.
Four years later, I took a trip out to where she lived to visit other people and ended up one night at a bar where she was and we were able to spend some private moments there talking and playing games that were available to us at the establishment. I felt, at the time, a certin affection for her that was similar to when we would be in constant touch with each other.
From that time until a year and a half ago our interactions were minimal - but the special place she held in my heart was something that was still there. She had told me once that when you love someone you love them forever and she said she still loved me. I had been resigned to the fact that the love of which she spoke was more than likely less intense than when we had originally interacted.
In late 2004 I had made arrangements to stay at her place because work obiligations had put me in a position so that I would be located where she lived. I did that in part because I wanted to see her again, spend time with her, and even though I could have found a place to live close to where she lived, I wanted to be able to spend some time with her and since she agreed I thought it'd be best.
Unfortunately, plans changed due to circumstances and when given an offer to go back home (albeit for a short period of time) I chose that instead of going to her. I wish I had chosen differently.
I found out through a friend that she had passed on late last year and I felt obligated not only to myself but somehow to her that I should go to her memorial service. I went to her service and let no one that was there know who I was in relevence to her nor why I was there. I went because I wanted to say, "goodbye."
It has been almost six months since then and I find myself in a position in which I think about her still. I sometimes feel that if I had not gone home that perhaps things would be different and I know that it is not something to concentrate on but at times I do feel as though maybe had I chosen a different course of action that perhaps things would have ended differenty for her.
I know she is in a better place now but somehow, selfishly, I don't find peace. I love her, will always love her and maybe I'm confused about things but I even then I do hope over time to find peace.
So, I suppose my question should be - will a part of me always feel this way? Will I grow to understand this over time, on my own? Or is there something there that will always be, to put it as loose as possible, nagging me? (link)
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I know what you are going through, I just lost my dad to a terribla disease, and yes at first you will feel like you cant live without her. Somedays are going to be tough, others days will be easier. So0medays u will feel like you cant be happy because she isnt here, but i promise it will get better. DOnt think about the what if's, but think about teh happy times you had together. If u need to talk more about this situation, you can contact em at an e-mail address, SkaterGirl25819@aol.com. Hopefully this helped!
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i really like this guy who is 13 and in 7th grade. i am 14 and in 8th grade. he is a typical jock - extremely good looking, plays football and runs track, dumb as a rock, and hangs out with all the "popular" girls (aka 8th grade cheerleaders). i play soccer and basketball, am pretty and make good grades. we are total opposites, but i am just like drawn to him. i have one class with him and we talk sometimes and he tries to flirt with me occasionally. i catch him watching me from across the room and sometimes he even coughs to get my attention and then when i look up, he will look down really fast. we go to a really small private school so we see each other a lot during the day. he will get in front of me in the lunch line or stand watching me while i am hanging out with my friends. he will point towards me sometimes and his friends (they are mostly 8th grade football players) will look up, but when i look up, they all look away. the other day in class, he asked me to come sit by him and talked to me a lot, in a flirty way. i am really crazy about him. do these things mean that he likes me too? i have only had one boyfriend. this guy doesn't think anything about putting his arm around a girl (not girlfriend, just friend) and that is like a big deal to me. i have never even held hands with a guy before. i have liked him for about seven months, but he doesn't know. i am too nervous to ask him out. what should i do? my parents think he is really immature and always needs attention, but he is really sweet. they have totally misjudged him. i need some good advice asap! i will rate all 5's!! thanks in advance :) !!! (link)
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well you could flirt back, and ask him to sit next to you, and stuff like that! you need to ask him if he likes you and ask him out, dont be afraid!
hoped i helped
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I really Love this boy and I thought he loved me back but....idk....ok we go to the same school and have to switch classes with each other...between classes I talk to him EVERTIME!...he used to talk back but now he just looks at me and rolls his eyes at me and walks away!...WHAT THE CRAP?...HOWRUDE RIGHT?...but anyways when we go to load the busses he trys to talk to me and wonts to hug me bye...(when his friends anit around!)...and when we get home he calls me...(SOMETIMES)...most of the time i have to call him. But one day when I called him his mom said "hunny is this kayla again??!!!!!!!?"!!!!!!!!!he was caught he told me he never talks to any other girls but just lastnight he tells me he talked to his x(which he dated for 1 or 2 years..not sure)MAkes me mad again but i try to hold it all in...BUT THREW THE DAY HE INGORES ME UNTIL WERE GOING HOME...ITS LIKE HE IS USIN ME...WHAT DO I DO BREAK UP WITH HIM OR JUST WAIT??...OR Belive him??..I Belived him once and he was lieing to me but like they say..(THERES ALWAYS THAT ONE SPECIAL PERSON IN YOUR LIFE THAT NO MATTER HOW MEAN OR WHAT THEY DO TO YOU YOU CANT LET THEM GO..)FOR ME IT HAD TO BE THIS BOY!!WHAT DO I DO???....PLEASE LET ME KNOW ANYTHING WILL HELP
*THANKS ---RaScHeLle!!---* (link)
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I am going through the same thing, literally, i mean everything, ex, using you, talking \, calling, EVERYTHING! YOU JUST HAVE TO TALK TO HIM, I DID THAT AND IT REALLY HELPED, HE WASNT TRYING TO USE ME AND HE SAID HE WAS THROUGH WITH HIS EX, SO YOU JUST HAVE TO TALK TO HIM AND BE LIKE WHATS GOIN ON?
LET ME KNO HOW IT TURNED OUT!
HOPED I HELPED
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well, my best friend is a guy. here's the deal. you see, i liked him for a while and he knew it. so he kind of led me on because he knows me well enough that i'm willing to do anything for love. (yes, i'm very dumb...) he also has a girlfriend and for a long time, he tried to make her jealous by also hanging out with me. of course, i found out everything that he was doing (a little late). and i was really mad at myself for letting him do that because all he was doing was using me to get her to want him. so now they're madly in love and i've moved on. i even put in my two weeks notice at my job because they both work there. but here's the problem...lately, i've been getting along better with my other guy friends and he has a problem with it. he keeps telling me he doesn't care and it's my life, not his, but i can tell it bothers him. what should i do? it's like he uses me as a back-up "girlfriend" just in case he loses her. what do i do? (link)
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I think you should tell the guy who uses you as a "back-up girlfriend" to go, excuse mi language, F**k himself, he shouldne use you like that tell him that if he wants to be with you fine but he cannot use you as a back up! As for the other go for it!
Hope I helped!
GoodAdvice12345
Sorry for the language!
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My boyfriend and I have been dating for about 3 weeks. He asked me to the Christmas Dance. I was thinking of mabye at the end of the dance I would go up to him and say, "I want to give you your Christmas present a little early." Then tell him to close his eyes and when he does then kiss him. We haven't kissed yet. Do you think he would like this?
14/f (link)
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um... he is a guy..... ya he would like it!
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At what age is it appropiate for a person to have sex? Ss we get older the standerds seem to be dropping. I just read a question by a thirteen-year-old asking if she should get on "the pill" if she has had sex. Since when is that what is on a 13-year-olds mind? (link)
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ok, well........there are lots of answers for that. Sometimes people say you should wait till after your married. Other people say that you should do it for the first time with someone who u truly love and not just some random person. it might be on a thirtenn year olds mind because she probley just hit purbity and is wondering.
Hope I helped!
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hey everyone im 17 and im a gurl..me and my bf have been together for awhile now but he lives kinda far from me so we dont get to see eachother much either so how do i kno if he is being true to me? i mean we talk like alot on the phone everyday and i dont think he would cheaton me but i am jus wondering i mean it could be possible he is since he lives far away and maybe would do it and i wouldnt kno...but he loves me and i love him...i bet i am jus worrying over nuthing but i have alittle doubt in my mind that he would do it but jus alil doubt...he talks about past relationships sometimes & it bugs me i dunno i am worrying over nuthing right? i rate 5's since this is long (link)
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I think that you are worring over somthing that could be there but most likely ist. But if you do find out he is cheeting on you dump him. Because we will never change.
Hope I helped!
GoodAdvice12345
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hey im a younge girl turning 16 ive been going out whith this guy 4 about 9 months but hes 21 hes in jail but i caint talk cause im on my last chance all i get locked up but some people think its ok that where going out some dont its only 5 years diffrence and i fallin in love whith him a now and im really close whith hes family can u give us some advice
(link)
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Well if you truely love him then i think you should get through it together. And you should see him as much as possible.
Hope I helped!
GoodAdvice12345
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ok well my boyfriend and me have been going out for awhile now. and he had this really good friend that he always hangs out with. well i recently went on vacation for a week and he hung out with his bestfriend all week and weekend while i was gone. so this was my first weekend home and i went to our highschool football game and his friend is not allowed in them she he went to the movies and my boyfriend isnt gonna be home all weeekend so i wont get to see him.
i dont want to break there friendship up i just want my boyfriend to do things with me and not jsut come to my house.
what should i do? (link)
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hang out with both of them!
Hope I helped!
GoodAdvice12345
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How would you describe love in your own words? I just want to know ho other people think about love and how they feel towards it.
(link)
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Whenever you see the person you feel all tingily and when they hold you you never want them to let go. Well at least thats what i think.
hope i helped!
GoodAdvice12345
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ok so my boyfriend and i have been dating for 4 months, but we've been close friends for about a year. when we first got together, everything was great.. we were so happy together!!! but then over the summer i went on a family vacation for alomost a month (i kept in touch with him as much as i could while i was gone, but i was overseas and it was hard) and when i got back (on his birthday! wouldnt think that was a good present? lol) he acted like he didnt care about me anymore. and it gets worse.. im a senior and he graduated last year, and he works two jobs, so it makes it hard to see him. when hes not working he "forgets" to call me and goes fishing or some other manly thing with his friends. now, i dont have a problem with his friends, but for some reason, his friends dont like me. whenever my boyfriend is with them, he acts like he doesnt like me either. for example, the other night he called me when i got off of work, and then in the middle of my sentence i could hear his friends come over and hes goes "look b!+ (link)
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You really need to dump him because if he really loved you he wouldnt care what his friends think. Im really sorry to tell you this but he is a jerk and i understant that you care about him but he will never change no matter what.
Hope I helped!
GoodAdvice12345
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ok this is my dilemma.there is this guy called rick in both my english and history clases.he looks at me a lot.and when i say something in class.he at times smiles at me like his proud of me or something.its wierd cause now am thinking about him A LOT.him and me as a couple and am not really sure if i even like him.DO I LIKE HIM OR DO I JUST LIKE THE ATTENTION HIS GIVING ME OR BOTH./AND DOES HE LIKE ME ANYWAY
i am so confused.help me out here guys.
i rate 5 (link)
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I think that he might like you either that or he thinks of you as a lil sis. And it looks to me that you like him and that you like the attention.
Hope i helped!
GoodAdvice12345
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okay i have a problem =/ my friend who i am really close to asked me to homecoming the other day, and i said no. well all along i have really wanted to go with him but people at my school hate him because he dumped one of them like 2 years ago, and they are still upset with him. the thing is, i said no because i didnt want people to be mad at me since it is only the 2nd week of school. Did i do the right thing? He seems really upset and i really want to go so does anyone have any advice? xO (link)
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No i dont think you did the right thing. I think that you should say your really sorry you acted like such a jerk, yes you acted like a jerk, and ask him if he still wants to go to the dance with a hartless fool. Im sorry but that was really mean that you said that it dosent matter what other people think if he is your friend you shouldnt care that people dont like him.
Im sorry but its the truth, and truth hurts!
GoodAdvice12345
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it's because im courting a girl right now... things are actually going the way i planned it but sometimes i just can't help being afraid.. i know she likes me but being liked by somebody is different from being loved by somebody...thats why everytime i see her cellphone filled with messages from his x boyfriend, i feel afraid, afraid that she might just leave me and go back to that ex-boyfriend of her....what am i going to do (link)
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What do the messages say? If they say stuff that sounds like he wants her back then tell her it bothers you. But if they say stuff like hey sup? then you should just forget them. When he leaves messages dose she call/text him back really fast or dose she wait a while? If she gets back to him really fast then she probably still likes hi. but if she waits a while to get back to him then they are probably just friends and you have nothing to worry about. If she dose still like him then you sould probebly break up with her before she hurts you.
Hope I helped!
GoodAdvice12345
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my boyfriend is sort of moving too fast for me. we've made out but he was trying to really touch my the whole time. i liked it for a while.then is just got annoying. i love him more then like..i think¿ what should i do? (link)
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Tell him that he is moving to fast for you and if he really cares about you then he will understand. And if he dosent just forget him! You will find someone better.
Hope I helped!
GoodAdvice12345
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I've been with this guy for about 9 monthes now. we are not officially together because that is the way i want it. BUT we are exclusive and aren't supposed to be with other people.
I cheated on him friday night. This isn't the first time i did it, but i told him about the other times. After the last one, he told me if i cheated again then we'd be done.
Do you think i should tell him what i did? I really do like him a lot. I'm seeing him today and need advice asap.
thanks (link)
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I think you should tell him because edventually he will find out and it would probably be better he hears it from you. And why are you in a relationship when you want to be with other guys? I mean if i were a guy and was dating you i wouldnt want my gf to like go arround cheeting on me and then come to me and act like i am the only guy she has been with. And if you like him alot why are you kissing or whatever other guys?¿?¿?
Because to me it sounds like you dont like him enough to be with just him.
Hope I helped!
GoodAdvice12345
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Ok....I've been talkin to my boyfriend on the phone alot But he ingores me almost all the time!!!!!!...all he does is plays his football/basketball game on his x-box and ingores me!...what should i do dump him or what?!? (link)
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Tell him it bugs you! And if he dosent at least try to stop dump him.
Hope i helped!
GoodAdvice12345
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ok well i know this guy likes me. I know it for a fact. But he is stalling to ask me out. Does anyone know who to get him to ask me out before next friday ( The school halloween dance )?
(link)
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Ask him out! Dont wait till he asks you just ask him!
Hope I helped!
GoodAdvice12345
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well there is this guy in my class, matthew, hes a goth. well he seems to always talk to me, and at lunch my group sits near his group, like 6 meters apart. and he sits with his girlfriend but he seems to look at me alot. in class today he went "I love your eyes" and he strokes my hair..and smells my hair...2 of my friends said he likes me...does he like me? (link)
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How can i put this nicely? DUH! Of course he likes you i mean not everyone comes up to you and compliments you on your eyes and plays and smells your hair! But i think that you shouldnt like jump at him because u said he has a gf righ? Ya u did. So i dont think you should like through yourself at him.
Hope I helped!
GoodAdvice12345
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ok, i am an 18 year old female and my boyfreind is 22 years old. we live a ways apart (him new york me ohio) because i was forced to move. well, we have been living apart for about a month and a half and we can't take it anymore. but we can't decide wether we should have me move up there with him or have him move down here with me. at first we had sorta planned me going and living with him. but then my mom found out that she might have a tumor on her ovaries, tubes, or liver. She doesnt want me to leave because she needs me and my brother will too. (in situations where there is trouble, my brother looks up to me, if im doing ok he will be fine and he knows that). So my mom asked me to ask him to move here so that we coudl both support her and each other. (my mom likes him) but then i owuld be asking him to uproot his life. from the place he lived for 20 years. from his family and his freinds and everything he knows. so i asked him if he would be WILLING to do so. He told me "Whatever i have to do to be with you". But now i feel like i am being selfish in asking him to do that. did i do the right thing in asking him to move here? please help i will rate all good answers as 5's. any smartass comments dont get rated! (link)
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1st of all i think its really cool that your mom likes him even though he is older that you! I wish my mom was that cool!
2nd of all i think you really need to be there for your mom and brother and i dont think its selfish to ask your bf to move to Ohio bc he seems to not mind (by what you have writen) bc it looks to me like he really loves you and if he dose even if you didnt ask him to move there he probably would have anyways. So I think that its not selfish.
Hope I helped!
GoodAdvice12345
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