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I'm an 29 year old guy.
I'll always do my best to give well considered and sincere advice - give me your best shot. P.S. Don't be afraid to ask me private questions, I rarely spend a lot of time answering non-private questions.

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advice

my friend is a cutter and in school she carved 'bitch'on her arm. i wasnt in her class. she just came to me after class and was about to cry and showed me her arm. i got pissed of and said 'wtf whyd you fuckin do that' on and on. im a recovering cutter i know how it is but her life makes mine seem good and mine is hell hers is worse. i just dont know what to do? im 13 shes 14 femalees my best friends got me to stop by grabbing the knife

Hey,

The best thing I can tell you is something to say to her. Might work, might not, depends on her.
-The reason people cut a lot of the time is that they want to make the pain they're feeling either justifiable (because it really physically hurts), or just visible, so that people close to them will be able to see they are in pain. The thing that you've got to understand is that when you cut, that doesn't do anything good for you. It's not "constructive", it's just another way you will end up self-destructing. In the end, you want things to be better, don't you? So you have to believe that they can be better, and that it's not you that's a problem. You have to stop making your problems worse by hurting yourself, along with all of the other things that have gone wrong for you.-

The main point is that although it might seem like there is a reason to cut, one must realise that there's no point in being self-destructive. Knowing that you have one person who won't hurt you anymore (yourself), is sometimes the thing you need most.

Also, getting pissed off at her about it might not be the best thing to do. I guess it's hard not to be mad, but it might be better for her if it seemed like you were worried about her, or that you cared about her. Being mad almost seems like a form of blame, whereas your first reaction should probably be more to do with -what is hurting you? I care for you-

I hope that made sense.
-K

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(Rating: 5) thanks-she knows i still care for her i do tough love-its great advice but it wouldnt work on her thanks anywayss
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