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August 11, 2005Answers:
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Hi i'm a sophomore and my boyfriend is also a sophomore and we've been dating for a year and a half. Only juniors and seniors are allowed to go to prom, but they can take freshman or sophomores as dates. This girl who is my friend and is also my boyfriends friend asked him to go to prom with her, but he didn't know what to say. So he asked me if he should or not. And I dont really want him to go with her because she always flirts with him. And I just don't feel comfortable with him going with her. So I guess my question is... Is it okay to tell him that I don't want him to go or is that too controlling? Because i don't want to be a mean girlfriend who won't let her boyfriend do anything, but I just feel bad if I don't let him go. Thanks!
You can tell him how you feel, but you can't tell him whether to go or not. Ultimately it's his choice, but hopefully after you tell him how you feel, he will make the right one.
And when you tell him, don't be like "I don't want you to go. If you go I'll be so mad". That comes off really threatning and controlling. Explain that its uncomfortable for you, and ask him to think about how he would feel if the roles were reversed.
If he ends up going, don't get jealous about it. If you've been dating for a year and a half, you should be able to trust him, and while it may suck for you to think about for awhile, things will more than likely be okay after all is said and done.
And one more thing-- Did your "friend" ask you before she invited your boyfriend to prom? If she did, did you tell her that you would prefer she ask someone else? Because if you didn't tell her, they probably have no idea that you are upset at all. And if she didn't ask you... Well, if I were you, I wouldn't call her friend much longer. She should have at leasts ran it by you first.
Good luck =)
(Rating: 5) She asked him and then she asked me... but yeah i'm kinda not a very strong person when telling someone no except with my boyfriend lol. Thanks a lot for the advice. It is so nice to hear that i'm doing the right thing. But it totally sucks cause all i can think about is him going! Ahh! Anyways thanks again!