about

You see that man in that picture? That is me. I'm metal as all holy heck and I will give you answers so metal, you'll grow a beard. Even if you're a teenage girl.

So throw a question my way? "I like this guy and this guy, what do I do?" PICK THE ONE WHO LIKES METAL! "I've been feeling depressed lately, what should I do?" LISTEN TO SOME METAL! "I need help with my pre-calc homework." THE ANSWER IS METAL!

I can handle it all, I will not shy away from any question. May the metal be with you!

advice

i think your so awesome i just went through EVERY SINGLE one of the questions you answered and i just like fell in love with you!

i dont know what to do!

how can be like you?

do you have a girlfriend!!?!!?

I LOVE YOU ROB!

My advice seems to have an opposite effect on you than it does on the people I give it too. They usually give me bad feedback and tell me I'm a horrible person and should die. So thank you very much. I'm extremely flattered!

As for what you could do to be like me? Well for starters, you'd have to become a twenty year old male. Then you'd have to legally change your name to Rob, start working at Starbucks, collect Pez, and give out badass advice.

Do I have a girlfriend? Hah, no. If I had one, I'd probably be out doing something rather than on this site giving out advice to people who actually do have them.

So, thank you again for this question/confession of love to me. I'm printing it our right now to frame on my wall as proof to my mom that I'm not a complete loser and people out there do like me. I'm pretty sure I just fell in love with you mysterious person.

I guess I miss you too!

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(Rating: 5) i love and miss yoouuu!

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