Member Since: September 22, 2006
Answers: 205
Last Update: February 1, 2007
Visitors: 14945
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I am a female and have been with my boyfriend/fiancee' for about 2 years. I recently moved away to college and had to leave him behind because I have to live in a dorm my first year. I visit home all the time and spend most of my time with him and not my family. I love him, and he loves me, I know this I really do, but lately all he has been talking with me about is that he wants to have sex with other people, that love and sex are not connected in his mind and that he is sexually attracted to another person, but not in love with them. This makes sense, and I understand him, but I told him that if he wants to have sex with another person, we are not together because I am not going to be waiting at home while he has sex with another. He doesn't understand that it's cheating on a person when you sleep with another while dating. He doesn't think that he should choose one or the other, he wants both. He thinks that I don't love him and that I don't understand him/ want him the way he is. The thing is I don't want him to resent me if he decides that he wants to stay with me and not have sex with other people and that I want him to see my point of view on this. I want him to understand me because he doesn't get what it would be like, he keeps telling me that I could have sex with other people as long as I didn't get attached to them, which he says I would do. I keep telling him that I don't want anyone else, but he doesn't think that he would get hurt because of it, if I did in fact sleep with another person.
I really have no idea what to do. I want him to be happy, which would mean giving him up, but I want to be happy myself, which would mean we would stay together and he would "forget" that side of him. Any advice on this, any thoughts that you have would be nice. I really appreciate you all taking time to read and answer this. Thank you. (link)
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Talk about a lot of red flags.
If I was in love with a woman, I would be fine with the relationship and I surely wouldn't be talking with you about having sex with other women. To me it sounds as if he is trying to justify sleeping around with other women while being BF/GF with you.
If you are unhappy with this development (as it sounds like you are) it might be best to hit him with an ultimatum. Either be with you and sleep with you alone, or the two of you need to break up so he can be free to sow his oats, which is what it sounds like he is wanting to me.
It kind of makes me queasy that he has the gall to say to you that you dont love him (but he does somehow, nm his wanting to sleep around on you), that he is putting you on the spot as the one that doesnt understand the other as though his request isn't outrageous (why cant you accept my wanting to have sex with other women while I am in love you?), and he even goes so far as to tell you that you can sleep around on him thereby making his want of sleeping around not all that bad.
I'd start looking for someone else. Its likely that he will sleep around on you with or without you knowledge at some point if he really thinks like this, and irregardless of his thinking that love and lust are not connected - he will eventually sleep with someone else and become emotionally involved. I'd start looking for someone who has the same mindset as you have.
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well i have a problem. i'm a girl 15 years old if that helpes. and i'm like totally into gay boys. i always watch video clips on the internet and everything cause i think it's really hot. so what can i do to stop being like that cause my friend thinks it's weird and i know it is weird.
help? (link)
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Its hypocrisy really, if you were a man and were turned-on by lesbians, no one would think it was odd - you would be amazed how many men have lesbian fantasies (and don't realize the difference between Lesbian and Bisexual lol). Its a strange world we live in, no doubt.
There are lots of women that are either attracted to the idea of 2 men being together, or they are simply bisexual. I'm straight, and I have had a woman ask my roomate and I if we were 'more than friends', as she started rubbing up on the two of us. We said 'Umm, no' and she almost ran out of our apartment, probably embarassed what we would think. We had always joked around together, but she apparantly took us seriously...but anyways...it was kinda sad. She took a helluva chance opening up to the 2 of us, and she was surely less apt to do so after that encounter. At least we were able to stay friends with her.
You aren't wierd, and you are hardly alone. And short of intense therapy, you probably wont be able to change what you are attracted to overnight. If this is really more than a passing fancy for you, and you think it might be indicative of your sexual orientation, then you will probably have to get used to the idea of looking for bisexual men. It does suck that you are having to deal with this at 15 though, but I would advise you to keep this to yourself as much as possible, as most people your age aren't mature enough or experienced enough to do anything but ostracize you. Once out of High School, you can branch out and not worry so much.
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yeah I ihave a new bf!
I love him a lot. and the other day were talking and he brought up the subject of how far have you ever gona with a guy. I told him just making out!
and he is 16.I am 14!
but I would expect him to e more mature but he has had a blow job hand job and been with a girl naked but didnt have sex. I love him like he loves me!
we met at an amusement park[knotts berry farm]
and we hav been going out for a week! but have been friends longer! so i am not a slut!
I felt a little jealous when he tole me that a girl did that and beat me to it!
well the thing that sucks is i am going with him to a party on saturday and his dad heard a rumor of him getting a girl pregnant so he got a pack of condems. and my mom knows we are going out and she wouldnt care if we happened to have sex!
but i am thinking if it is good thing!
so should i have sex??
pleasehelp me!
(link)
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No offense, but at 14 you probably don't have enough experience to know whether you are in love or not. Your line about "I love him like he loves me" sounds somewhat naive...I can remember when I was his age, most guys didn't love anyone...they were just out for sex.
This guy sounds like he's just another teenager out to try to get laid, and he is trying to guilt you into having sex by saying "OMG this other girl did this and that!" Your feeling jealous is probably what he intended, hoping you would 'prove your love' to him by outdoing this other 'mystery girl'.
And when his dad heard a rumor about his son getting a girl pregnant, he just hands him a box of condoms? Either this whole post is a scam for laughs, or his family is highly dysfunctional. My father would have slapped me upside the head a few times and grounded me until my next birthday for getting a girl pregnant, and then demanded I do right by this other girl. And NM that your mother doesn't seem to care that you are having sex at 14, so I hope that YOU do.
No, you shouldn't have sex. You think this guy really loves you? Tell him you dont want to have sex for, lets say, 2 more years. If he REALLY loves you he might be disappointed but he would stay with you...THATS love. But my guess is that doing this would seriously disrupt his plans for getting you in the sack, and he would simply go looking for someone easier to get into bed. I'm serious, if you think he loves you tell him 'no' and see what happens...you'll get the answer as to whether this is love, or just another case of naive teenage lust.
My gut tells me you are going to have to learn the hard way like 99% of people do, so this whole posting will probably be moot in the end.
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I just got back together with my ex. He's the only guy I've ever loved & we have so many memories together. The problem is, he's not acting the way he did before when he was my boyfriend. Our relationship back then was the kind people are jealous of, but now it seems like he doesn't want it to be as serious. He barely calls and comes to see me, but I stand my ground and act like I don't care. He's the one that was begging for me back! I don't even know if I call this a relationship, but I want to confront him & ask what's going on. How should I go about doing this? (18/f) (link)
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You might have been nothing more than an easy option for him, when he didn't have anyone else to be in a relationship with. Its unfortunate that so many people do this, and ex's are simply nothing more than a convenient option.
Just ask him, straight up, if he wants a relationship or not. If he does and he's serious, he should man up and spend some time with you (make sure you mention to him your complaints). Otherwise, he'll probably feel that you are asking for too much and break it off, especially if he is thinking of you as nothing more than an easy hook-up. And, if he's the indecisive type and tries to play the middle ground, just break up with him.
There are a ton of good guys out there, getting back together with an ex and playing these kind of games doesn't do you any good.
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I'm a freshman in highschool, and I've started hearing more and more about people drinking, smoking, doing drugs, etc. I don't know if it's just my school, or if it's normal... but it seems like if you don't drink, people are like, "OMG?! YOU DON'T DRINK?!" Is it like that elsewhere? Or is it just my school? Because I'm hearing a lot about it now. Also, why do so many people do these things to themselves? What to they get out of it? A hangover? They like that? Can't they have fun without getting drunk or high? I don't get it. Sorry so many questions, thanks in advance. (link)
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Just wait until you hit College, lol.
I imagine a large part of the attraction to drugs and alcohol is that these things are frowned upon, and the have a certain mystique about them. You add that into a High-School population that is far too concerned with being 'cool', and its only a matter of time before you are getting pressured to do what others are doing.
High School is pretty much childs play when it comes to drugs and alcohol, and it gets worse as time progresses. On the up side though, it is easier to define your friends after High School and you can easily avoid people who would want you to do kegstands and beer bongs, if that isn't your thing.
Seriously, I've been a hardcore drinker and 'recreational' drug user, but I've been able to put that behind myself years and years ago...and I rarely miss anything. All you are missing is drunken date rape, the lovely smell of vomit, DUI's, doing drugs that you have NO idea of what is really in them, getting a police record, blowing so much money on drugs and alcohol each month that eventually its like buying a new car and driving it off a cliff, friends who only call you when their stash is empty and don't give a damn about you, coughing up some really sinister things in the morning after a night of partying, and basically taking a chance on ruining your life in the long run.
One thing to be proud of is indivuality, and letting yourself be pressured into alcohol and drugs isn't being yourself, its being sheep. Just make sure you are doing what YOU want to do, and don't let yourself be swayed by those that are trying to fit in by being morons.
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Female, 14.
I feel quite stupid for resulting to a website to sort out my religious beliefs, but here it goes.
I don't know what to believe anymore. I went to church for quite sometime, but I never understood anything they were talking about and I just felt so left out, confused, and stupid everytime I asked a question about the lesson. I eventually begged my mom to stop making me go because I just felt so uncomfortable at church.
If God comes to Earth, is he going to come as some random person, and just take all those who believe in him? How do I know if I truly believe?
If God controlled everything, why would he let people get sick, raped, or killed in the first place? Why do we have to beg and ask for things to get better?
Also, did God like tell people to run out and believe in him, or idk, how did he all the sudden become "God"
I guess I need things to be proven to me and explained. Anyone who helps or gives me any sites to help me would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks so much. (link)
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Many would say that you are stepping onto a dangerous path - by that I mean you are beginning to question what others would have you believe on faith alone. Many who look for answers outside of their faith often end up leaving their faith. At some point you will have to make a very simple choice: either look for answers elsewhere and turn your back on your religion, or stay and pray for enlightenment and hope that is the right choice for you.
Ask yourself if you really want to remain with your religion - if so, then you should be wary of asking for answers outside of those that share your beliefs - many of the answers you get will steer you away from Faith. If you want to stay with your religion, then I would suggest taking your concern to elder members of your church and hope that they can help.
I myself have struggled with these kind of questons in the past, and I went beyond the Church when I didn't get answers that made sense to me. I've looked into other religions, and that has simply raised more concerns and questions. Philosophy may have turned me onto a different way of questioning truth, but that has actually made it more difficult to accept religious 'truth' on faith alone. In the end I've reached a point where I'm torn between a cynical view on religion, and a desire to believe in GOD in a religious venue. Unfortunately the truth is that religion cannot be buttressed by facts and logic, it is founded in that which defies logic - looking for religious answers in this way will simply take you further from being able to believe with FAITH, and faith alone. I caution you here, not to take this step lightly if you value your religion at all!
If you are the kind of person that MUST have explanations, and those provided by religion don't cut it for you, its pretty much up to you to decide what you feel is the truth and to look in that direction. I am somewhat hesitant to point you in any direction, as everyone needs to at least decide where they are going to look for answers for themselves.
IMO you are reaching the point where you are beginning to notice some of the uncomfortable trends that creep into religions at some point. Why is it that no one else asks questions? Is it that they are too afraid of not fitting in with everyone else that they don't asks questions and feign understanding? Or is it that you are somehow deficient on a personal basis somehow and are unable to believe on Faith alone? Trust me, you aren't alone in asking these questions.
But like I said, I'm hesitant to give you my beliefs as they may unduly influence your opinion on religion in general, which would be a bad thing considering you have yet to make a definite choice.
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It's stated in the koran: "Forbidden to you (for food) are: dead meat, blood, the flesh of swine"
So when it says dead meat does it mean just the swine or it also refers to any other animals?
And also, does islam prohibit eating chicken? (link)
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I believe 'dead meat' applies more to animals that died of natural causes w/o human interference - though I could be wrong and hope that if so, someone will come along and correct me. =]
-- "He only prohibits for you the eating of animals that die of themselves (without human interference), blood, the meat of pigs, and animals dedicated to other than GOD. If one is forced (to eat these), without being malicious or
deliberate, he incurs no sin. GOD is Forgiver, Most Merciful." [2:173]
Also, you arent to eat the flesh of any animal that is not herbiverous (as in, eats flesh itself) or an animal that has been fed flesh or blood. You may not be aware, but some premade animal feeds are not 100% organic, and actually have animal byproducts in them.
You should be aware that there are different interpretations on what is Halal, and what is Haram. To non-Muslims this can appear to be nit-picking, but it can be fairly serious. For example, on one hand you have:
"Today, all good food is made lawful for you. The food of the people of the scripture (Jews & Christians) is LAWFUL (HALAL) for you......" 5:5
However, that isn't the last word - for example, Kosher isn't always Halal:
"In addition meat done by Christians and Jews may be Kosher but not necessarily Halal since they differ at times in terms of alcohol content, meat derivatives and L-cystein produced from human hair. Kosher foods may contain alcohol, gelatin prepared from swine, animal fat not slaughtered in God's name. All of these are definitely anti-Halal. Halal foods must come from animals that were slaughtered while Muslims pronounce the name of Allah or His Oneness. Just No electric shocks, No machine blades." (http://www.understanding-islam.com/related/text.asp?type=rarticle&raid=220)
Also cruel transportation and slaughtering practices can make meat Haram as well, up to and icluding tail docking and cattle branding (http://www.islamicconcern.com/halalmeat_teaching.asp).
If there is a Mosque in your area, you could simply go and ask to speak to someone and hear this for yourself; though I admit most people who aren't Muslim won't be inclined to do so.
EDIT: No, chicken isn't prohibited per se, but it needs to be Halal like other meat. So killed by hand I imagine (possibly cleaned/plucked by hand as well) and not by machine, along with reciting Allah's name. I would imagine therefore that most chicken isn't Halal then (like McNuggets lol).
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Is there any way to get rid of racism? I have a little bit of ethnic prejudice......I feel awful, and I'm trying to get rid of it as much as I can..........this feeling is horrible. Is it possible to get rid of an ethnic prejudice? (link)
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Well, I just deleted 15 paragraphs that I typed up, it was way too long. In a nutshell though:
Yes, you can get over prejudice, though likely you will be fighting it for your entire lifetime. In fact, I think most people do (as do I). Many simply deny that they could be prejudiced, and delude themselves into thinking that they are somehow above the flaws that the rest of humanity has.
It might not be PC of me to say this, but most people have some degree of prejudice whether they can admit it to themselves or not. Its something each individual fights, with widely varying degrees of success. Though, some dont fight prejudice, rather they embrace it - and that of course has taken the meaning of prejudiced from bad to worse.
The fact you are thinking of this is a good thing, not a bad thing. If everyone would think along these lines and actively examine themselves in an objective light, the world would be a much better place. Instead, many people fall into the many traps that are out there such as "I cant be prejudiced, I'm the one everyone is prejudiced against" or "My religion says such and such, therefore its not prejudice, its the Holy truth".
But don't let it tear you up though, just be fair and kind to everyone. This doesn't mean let others walk all over you (if someone is an a-hole, then they are an a-hole irregardless of race, creed, etc). If you do your best, and try to treat everyone as best you can, then you really shouldn't feel 'awful'. Hell, you should feel proud...at least you felt bad and are trying to do what few others attempt, irregardless of the fact that so many blindly deny that they have any prejudice at all.
If you can, try to bridge the gap between ethnicities, and become familiar with others. Eventually, with familiarity should come acceptance, to some degree.
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ok quick question what does "jenna say qwa" mean? (its french but i dont know how to spell it in french so that just how you pronounce it.)
kthxbye (link)
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Well, whenever I've talked to anyone originally NOT from America that is a fluent French speaker, I've been told this isn't really something someone would say. Yet, Americans seem to use this with aplomb, and if you actually google "je ne sais quoi" you'll get a ton of hits, not to mention dictionary defintions for it. I've heard this used on television, and in normal conversation, in english - yet I had one college-level French instructor (she was actually French, Strausbourg I think) who recoiled in distate when a classmate asked her about the phrase.
Irregardless, it is out there, and it's easy to find definitions for it. As to whether or not its 'proper' French, or if its simply some mish-mash of French words put together and used by English speakers...I think I'd side with those who are actually raised speaking French myself, lol.
http://www.bartleby.com/61/99/J0029900.html
I've heard before that this has more of a root in English literary traditional, which (supposedly) is why this phrase seems to be popular amongst many who are actually quite educated - though I hadn't before been interested (or bored) enough to look at this before. Fortunately I happened upon this interesting tidbit, concerning a poem titled "The Je Ne Scai Quoi" (yes, scai!). Written in 1757 by the then poet-laurate William Whitehead. Odd, and similar to the phrase in question - even written nearly 250 years ago.
http://www.theotherpages.org/poems/whiteh01.html
Of course, I have to give thanks to Everything2.com (thats squared I believe, lol) for an interesting take on this:
http://everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=1032660&lastnode_id=0
ESPECIALLY the last 2 paragraphs at the bottom! Its interesting, but thats all I can come up with. I'd really like to ask someone more familiar with this in a historical sense, as I'm still not sure this is where the phrase generated from, or if its simply been outdated in modern, spoken French.
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I really want a bf. I was with my best friend and her boyfriend tonight and they were so cute together and itmade me really want one. It made me feel kinda lonely too so what are somet ips for getting a boyfriend and showing guys your interested and talking to them more? kthx. (link)
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Well, hopefully you aren't wanting a BF simply because your best friend is happy and dating. Being single has its advantages, I myself don't even actively look for GF's, but I keep my options open - I segue back and forth without much rhyme or reason.
The hardest thing IMO is finding someone that you will get along with, share interests with, and would actually be happy with. I'd seriously suggest finding someone you like as a friend, is a good person, as well as being attracted to. I avoid just dating left and right, you end up with dating horror stories that way.
If you are interested in a particular guy, I still believe that women shouldn't be afraid of being direct as possible. Ask a guy if they want to go out to do something, dinner, whatever. Many guys (myself included) are notoriously dense at times with flirting, until someone overdoes it (friends always tell me "Dude she was so flirting with you" while I think someone was simply being nice). Flirting can work, but try to avoid being slutty about it, as that can send the wrong message (many guys will simply think "Alright, sex!"). Even something as simple as being physically close, listening to what someone has to say, even giving them your phone number and asking someone to call you are all decent ways of trying to give someone a hint.
Also, don't be afraid of rejection - EVERYONE gets rejected at some time or another. Don't let it faze you, and keep your eyes open for someone else. Try not to let it get you down, the next BF might be just around the corner.
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My bf is the owner and chef of a small cafe in town. I've been hearing stories from two of the waitresses that work for him that he is a complete jerk to work for. One of them told me that once he threw something and yelled "how many times do I have to show you"! He will scream and holler at them in front of all the customers if they screw up an order when it's busy. One time I went in to talk to one of the waitresses and he yelled "no talking while your working"! I was so embarrassed for her that I left. I heard he also said once "I would fire you if I wasnt' friends with you" to another worker. My concern is if he has this much anger at his work that he could turn it on me. Should I get out? (link)
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I guess it hinges on whether he can, or cannot, keep his anger at work. Even if he can, it sounds like it might still bother you in the long run if he is at work with this kind of anger (even if he never brings it home).
This is one of the reasons that I have refused to do kitchen work in the past; its exacting if you take it seriously and it can be extremely high-stress. And if he is a chef, I'm sure he must have some high standards - things need to be right the first time and you cant screw around.
I'm not excusing his outbursts though (shows like Hells Kitchen might inadvertadly give people the impresson that kitchen tantrums are normal). Unfortunately I am not familiar with your BF enough to advise you as whether you should talk to him about this. That will have to be your call, as to whether or not he would take it the right way and not lose his temper if you bring it up.
I cant say if he will turn on you or not, but I would say its a good thing that you are asking the question. If you think he would be willing to change, then by all means go for it. But if you think it might simply exacerbate things bringing it up to him, then maybe you should be ready to leave just in case. We cannot really tell how he is, and if he is violatile enough that he might direct his anger at you eventually (he might never, who knows).
Bear in mind though that its a stressful situation, and he may have had some justification in his anger (though perhaps his method of dealing with it was wrong). Bottom line though - if you are wanting something long-term with him, I'd insist that he get some counseling, some help for his anger, so that he can deal with the stress better. Especially before going any further than BF/GF with him, if the anger bothers you, either it needs to be dealt with or it might be a deal-breaker.
GL in however you choose to deal with this
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Hey i have question, does colgne get old like i have curve and i had it for a year. Does the smell change and go bad? or does it stay good. I have 4 different sprays ( two curve, one jordan, and estee lauder) and i want to get another jordan. Wjat should i do? (link)
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I've never has any go bad, or stale, or whatever, over like 15 years or more. There might be a problem with this, technically, but I've never heard of it.
But, I do regret that on some cologne, now that I have run out (it took several years) they dont even make it anymore, and there isn't an easy way to get it again.
I wouldn't buy multiples unless you are 100% sure that its your favorite, and that it might be hard to get in the future. Most of my colognes lasted a long time, and when they did run out I wasn't all that heartbroken over it.
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when i hook up with my boyfriend, i don't know if i'm doing things right...it always seems to take forever. its so embarressing. i don't have lots of expirence in this area...i feel soo embarressed....help? (link)
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Blackbelt has a good point, and its along the lines of what I was going to touch upon.
I went out to dinner with one GF, had the whole romantic night. We both got turned on, went home, and with all the build-up, I had my orgasm within something like a couple minutes because I had been so turned on. I ended up feeling like an ass, because I knew she didn't get much more out of it other than the fact that she had done that to me. If a man is selfish, then this isn't a problem...but otherwise, men start to see themselves as the 'weak link' and start to try everything they can do to prolong themselves for the womans benefit.
I had another GF who complained about this though, saying she preferred things being 'quick and dirty' and likened men trying to be some kind of 'superman' to being hit in the crotch repeatedly until walking was a painful thing.
Trust me - if a man has an erection, you aren't doing anything wrong, so to speak. Most men can 'allow' themselves to orgasm if they want, rather quickly.
Best thing to do IMO is to have him tell you what he likes (even while in the act), and try to do just that. Otherwise, I'd just say to look out for yourself - if this is a problem for him, he should say something. And if he truly is trying to prolong himself for your benefit, then worry less about him and take advantage of it.
A woman who is enjoying herself, and is into it, is one of the MOST attractive and sexy things, hands down. If you let yourself go and worry less about him...well lets just say things might turn out different.
Also along these lines are women who don't like to make a lot of noise or any outward sign when they DO have an orgasm, and the man has no clue that he can relax. The guy can still be thinking of bombs, and death, and everything else trying to stave off an orgasm long after the point it was even needed, because he is thinking that the woman still hasn't had her orgasm. She can be there thinking "WTF is he STILL going?" while he is thinking "Crap, I'm about to pass out, I dont think she is ever going to have an oregasm".
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what would happen if i take in another male cat. i have one and he is very mellow, and the one that i will adopt is from a vet office, and is used to other animals. both are neutered. will they get along well?
please answer only if you have experience with ownership of multiple cats please!!! (link)
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I would imagine that they will start establishing a pecking order somewhat quickly, and thats perfectly normal. At worst I would think they might fight a little at first (which is normal), and do some posturing and hissing (especially the cat you already have, who considers your house his territory). We still have two spayed females that bat at each other and hiss, and they have been around each other for at least 6 months.
I'd be very, very surprised if they dont eventually get used to each other. Now there is no guarantee that they will be best of friends and sleep together, but most of our cats over the years at least got to the point where they would tolerate each other and not fight outright.
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i didn't know which catagory this would fit in.. but i have this major problem about worrying about my cat. here is the story:
i had another cat some years back and she was injured by a speeding car one night while i was out. She was turned in the emergency room in critical condition with life-threatening conditions such as blindness, and jaw deformation.
my family and i decided to put her to sleep, and later on (two years later) i got a new cat. i made her an indoor cat so nothing would really happen to her. however, i always get bad visions of my cat dying in her sleep, like Sudden kitten death syndrome (Like SIDS) and there have been times I woke up seeing my cat not move at all, and I got terrified, and tried waking her up and she did. I always freak out when she is laying next to me or somewhere else. I always get worried she'll die and I get so scared so much that I feel like it's sending me into major paranoia.
I love my cat so much and it would break my heart if something ever happened to her, which is probably why I get like that. But I am still a little confused why I keep feeling that way, and I would like to know. I would also like advice on how to treat this problem so I would feel a bit more ease.
thanks in advance (link)
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While this might seem a tad extreme, I dont think this is abnormal. This isn't at all unusual with parents, particularly parents who have lost 1 child and still have others to worry about. And the fact that you have this strong of an emotional bond with the cat I think only goes to explain why you feel this way.
I also imagine that you may have some guilt from your last cat even if you don't conciously realize it (people feel guilty and wonder if they could have prevented a sad or traumatic occurence), and some fear for your new cat could be attributed to this as well.
Usually I wouldn't worry so much about it, but if you are really fixating on this a lot you might want to see a therapist. Particularly if you have recurring dreams/nightmares, or if you are worrying about this far too often during the day. Anyone with experience as a therapist would be far better equipped to go any further into this with you.
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Guys do you think a girl that wears a A cup bra size can still be pretty? Or do you think a girl that wears a A cup bra size is ugly? (link)
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I'm a guy and I really dont care. Most of the time, a womans breasts are proportional to a womans body type. So if you are petite, or athletic, and you have A cup breasts, then its probably about right. Larger women of course tend to have larger breasts and thats fine for their body type. What often trips me out is these tiny little women walking around with obviously fake breasts. If you are a larger woman, more curvacious so to speak, and have A-cups or if one breast is noticeably larger/smaller than the other one, then I can see implants as a good thing. But, most of the time, I feel that implants are overdone and unescessary.
I'm sitting here thinking about the women I've dated/loved/etc and none of them were over a C I think, and most were A-B. I'm sure that there are guys that like large breasts, but I really dont even think that much on breasts when I am checking a woman out, unless they are so unGodly large that its a joke.
In the end though I would say that being an 'A' cup doesnt make you ugly, a lot of women are attractive with small breasts. But some women get implants due to being self conscious (so I guess thats ok if its that big of an issue for them), or if they simply look funny with small breasts. But I'd say 99% of women with small breasts are perfectly fine, and there is no problem at all.
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One of my best friend's came to me and another friend (also both bi) and told us he was bi and he was serosuis. Now fast forward a couple weeks, he says to me he's complety straight and would never do another guy, now i think he's lying whatta do ya think?
btw were all 14 (link)
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Are you Bisexual? If not, he might be simply trying to fit in with you and your friends when he isn't actually Bi. You know, when he is around your friends he says he is, when around just you he says he isn't...
Now if you are Bi as well, it could be he is confused. Being that you are all only 14 (cripes), I'd say this is pretty likely actually. Many of my gay/bi friends took years and years to come to grips with their sexuality, and a couple are still switching back and forth (I'm Gay! Wait, I'm Bi! No I'm Gay! Now, I'm Bi again!). He could be confused and just be trying to figure it out for himself /shrug.
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i babysit but i hate kids. does anyone have suggestions so its better for me and them? (link)
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Yes - don't babysit.
Seriously, I'm not being an arse here. If you dislike kids, if they drive you nuts and you hate to watch them, putting yourself in that position anyways isn't good. If you have a temper and you hate kids, then you are running a risk by choosing to babysit. You owe yourself and the kids more.
There are other things to do other than babysit.
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I have really BAD acid reflux, sometimes to the point where it's unbearable, and it hurts my throat so bad i can't even breathe. My question is how can I treat this? I've already tried just every OTC medication out there, including the popular "Tums" and "Rolaids" -- tried it all. I CAN'T go to a DOCTOR because my parents don't understand.
And some things to help you out:
*I rarely ever eat spicy foods - anything that triggers stomach acids to go up the digestive tract.
*It occurs anytime, anywhere, no matter how I stand, sit or lay. It worsens when I exercise.
*Even not eating at all triggers it, drinking lots of water or beverages that do not contain acids still trigger it.
So what should I do, and how can I treat this? And if you REALLY think I need a Doctor (which I'm sure I do), how can I persuade my parents into taking me?
But it would still be awesome to read advice on treatment at home and certain limitations or methods -- anything at all would be great.
Thanks in advance! (link)
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Well, I would still try to see a doctor if this is persistent and ongoing.
I go through a lot of this myself. My epiglottis(?) is jacked up from acid (and alcohol I've been told) so it doesnt work right. Also my family has a history of having the stomach lining growing up into the throat or somesuch http://www.gicare.com/pated/ecdgs40.htm And, we've has a couple of family members die of esophageal (sp?) cancer.
Antacids are only a quick fix, and I've been told that huge doses of them (like I take) are actually bad for you over the long term. You need to see a Gastroenterologist to see whats up, and to possibly get something like Nexium which is the bomb. I'm not on a prescription, but I snake a few now and again from family when my reflux gets too bad, and its a world of difference believe me.
With me, I cant keep anything down period - so often anything like water can 'raise' the amount of stuff in my stomach, which raises stomach acid upwards. I have to eat smaller meals, and not eat before I go to bed unless I want my stomach contents trying to rush up. Also, a lot of odd stuff really kills me: Gatorade, greasy foods, a lot of spices like Paprika if there is a lot of it, and even chocolate.
But anyways, first you need to work on your parents to go see the doctor or wait until you are 18 and go on your own. I'd also suggest trying to track down an OTC version of Nexium/Prilosec or somesuch http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2003/06/21/health/main559770.shtml
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what is the federalist no. 1 by alexander hamilton talking about (link)
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Basically, Hamilton is making arguments for the Constitution at a time when there was a great deal of division over it. I think that paper #1 served as a srtarting point, and as an outline, for all the papers to follow which argued for the ratification of the Constitution. People believed, for example, that many Republics had failed in the past and there were those that doubted the US (with the states combined in a single nation rather than individual nations on their own) could succeed where others had failed. Many people looked upon Government, ideally, as being State-centric rather than Federalized in a sense; for example New York was actually considered an independent nation under the Articles of Confederation. The idea of a Federal government with some large measure of authority over the individual states was somewhat revolutionary at the time and it wasn't universally supported.
One decent site to read if you need/want more info: http://www.gradesaver.com/classicnotes/titles/federalist/section5.html
Hamilton was one of many who were, I guess, idealistic in a sense and supported more of a United government with the states combined under it. There was a great deal of concern and fear over presenting a united front, especially against England, and I think that the need for the Constitution to be ratified was integral to this.
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