Member Since: August 7, 2012
Answers: 1038
Last Update: August 2, 2021
Visitors: 29581
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So in elementary school (my school was kindergarten to grade 8) I had a good balance between guy friends and girl friends. Everything was fine but then high school started and everything changed. I started getting anxiety and of course being a teenager I became more self-conscious of my self and ended up having no guy friends and only girl friends. Basically I remember the first week of high school I overheard these group of grade 12 guys saying they were going to approach the ugliest girls in school and call them pretty then basically talk bad about them behind their backs. I thought it couldn't happen to me, cause I'm a nobody but of course while I was walking they came up to me and I shut it down and said "you guys said that to the last five girls before me" then they called me ugly for calling them out. Of course that affected my self-esteem another thing that affected my self-esteem was how the popular boys kind of treated me indirectly, so one time in grade 11 I was minding my own business talking to my friends and one of the popular boys saw me and overheard my convo and was like "she's sooo beat" which is slang for ugly, I brushed it off though. Another thing was this guy had a crush on my friend so his friend made a joke and said if things don't work out with my friend he can go for me, the guy was so disgusted and the whole class started laughing. Lastly all throughout high school when boys would come up to approach my friend they don't acknowledge my existence at all. So basically my high school experience kind of affected my confidence, i didn't end up making any guy friends because of how superficial the boys in my school were and now that I'm in university it's so hard for me to even talk to a boy because of my anxiety and me thinking about if he's judging me based on my looks like all the guys in my high school did. As you can see I've never had a boyfriend either and I'd like to finally change that in my second year of university but because I have no confidence in my self, never had any guy friends to blossom the friendship into a relationship I'm kind of stuck. If you have any tips on how to be more confident or your opinions on my situation please let me know it would be appreciated. Background on me is that I'm an 18 year old female, in high school I didn't wear any make up but now I'm trying to get into it to enhance my features but I do have a baby face which sucks. I'm not overweight or anything but I'm curvy but wear baggy clothes because I don't want to be approached based on my body shape if you know what I mean (link)
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Comments and experiences at the stages of our lives you are talking about can indeed have long lasting and severe effects on our self-image and self-esteem. And they are common too, youngsters are not well-known for restraint or compassion. And their choice of targets is either totally indiscriminate, or alternatively carefully chosen to produce best results. The girl is nominated to be 'the ugly one' not because she is ugly. She is chosen because they kind of sense that she's the one who will be hurt most by being CALLED ugly. And thus give them the most sport. Later we come to realise some important facts. One of them being that nobody can wind you up unless you give them the key first. Nobody humiliates you without your permission. Think about it. By taking the bait and giving them the intended reaction we tacitly give them permission to bait us. Words and analysis will only go so far in undoing the 'damage' your experiences caused. Hope 'damage' doesn't sound too dramatic? The anxieties come to reside mainly in subconscious areas of our brain and thus beyond verbal discourse. They're best addressed by actions, and in my opinion you've hit on just the right course of action on your own. It's in the end of your question. Building up that self-image. Identifying your strengths, which you build on. And the areas which are not-so strong and need some thinking and working on. Basically, what is this doing? It's posting a clear and self-determined 'positive' to match and cancel out each of those 'negatives' you've still got preying on your confidence. You'll get there, I'm sure. They don't have to neatly and perfectly cancel either. Hey! Post some 'positive-plus' and even 'positive-plus-plus' stuff if you're willing to put the extra effort in. Then their attempts to knock you down in the past will actually have been responsible for a brighter and stronger 'you' than would have been the case otherwise. How's that for getting even? Even-plus, I'd say! Keep plugging away, you're on the right path here.
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So today since it's the New Year it's a tradition for my dad to do a New Years prayer so while he was praying he was praying that there shouldn't be any introverts in my family anymore. He was saying that directly at me since I'm an introvert, I got pretty pissed and told him that was rude and uncalled for then left. Is there anything wrong with introverts? I can't change my personality if he doesn't like it oh f**king well. Just because I'm an introvert doesn't mean I don't talk to people. I'm generally a shy person but since I stared university I had to get out of my comfort zone nobody was gonna come up to me and try to be friends I had to do it myself. So I don't understand why my dad said that as if being an introvert is a bad thing? (link)
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There's absolutely nothing wrong in having a nature which tends towards introvert rather than extrovert. A degree of reserve/reticence is no vice and is often a good thing. We all want to be on-board, but we don't necessarily want to fall overboard! There's only one 'life and soul' of any party. There's only one 'centre-stage'. Complete with spotlight! We don't all feel the need to own it and hog it. Don't let reticence become a total withdrawal though. Then you'll be reluctant to join in the party at all, even when you see others in there and having fun. It's all a matter of degree. You mention taking the initiative in socialising in your university life? Well, as you've realised there are times when you have to take the initiative. Seize the day. When we need to promote ourselves and 'blow our own trumpet' as it were. Then you suppress your natural reticence, grit your teeth and step-up to the mark. Your 'I am what I am' attitude is admirable. Shows autonomy, and strong sense of identity and self-confidence. In this case I don't hesitate to say, you're right and your dad is less right. He's allowing his personal opinion to dominate, and indeed putting it up as some sort of universal maxim. Which it certainly isn't. Best wishes for 2017 mate.
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Hello thank you for responding to my question I am the person who asked about how to tell if my teacher was flirting with me or not and thank you for what you said I do understand what you mean, I do not flirt with him and I would not act on it. It's just him making sexual comments and showering me with compliments and always trying to be around me and talk to me and I never see the teacher be like that around other people. Everyone I know says he flirts with me but I wasn't really sure honestly. I wouldn't ever do anything though because I wouldn't want to ruin anything for him, even though I am very attracted to him which is difficult. :( thank you for the advice (link)
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Hi there! You're welcome. Just reading through your post. Some of what you are saying re. other people noticing and comments which are unmistakably sexual in nature would suggest you possibly would not have to 'do too much' (as you might say) for the situation to get a little bit out of hand? Add in the fact that you find him attractive and I appreciate it is difficult for you. It's easy to dismiss things like this as a 'crush'. All in your mind, and even 'wishful thinking' or fantasy. But that really is not giving you any credit or attempting to hear out the actual facts. These feelings of 'connection' are a bit mysterious, and can make other acquaintances/relationships (which don't seem to have it) seem a little bit dull and hard work by comparison? I think I can get a good idea of a lot of what you are feeling and thinking here. You clearly are thinking about the action/consequence nature of things, showing you have a mature mind and attitude. Which is great. And you can probably see how such things do indeed happen? So, keep things light and fun. A little harmless flirting, out in the open is not too sinister. Enjoy being admired by a guy, and indeed by a guy who you are quite happy to be admired by. Sounds like something you might have to get used to. Heart-breaker!!
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I have a teacher that I think flirts with me A LOT, but then again I'm not sure, I feel like he's interested in me but can someone please tell me some signs to look for? Or how can I really tell he's flirting with me, I like him a lot but would never do anything bad. I just would like to know. (link)
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I quite agree with your previous reply. If we basically want to see 'flirting' we will see it in a situation. Whether it is really there or not. Liking him a lot isn't a problem. And I would guess he likes you a lot too. Sometimes people just kind of generate a 'spark' with each other. We connect. They are easy to like, easy to talk to and you just kind of feel relaxed and comfortable around each other. Age, sex and/or suitability as a partner don't always figure in this connection at all. It could spring-up anywhere. It has to be a two-way thing as well. If it is all one-sided there won't be any spark. I do think looking for signs and 'tells' that he might be flirting is a bad idea though. I mean if you did, would you act on it? Would it be fair to expect him to not respond if you did? If he did respond, he'd lose his job, never get another teaching job, and maybe worse. Not quite a happy-ever-after ending, eh? So, cards on the table what positives can we take? That you're growing-up, and you can and will attract guys. That growing-up means growing up mentally too, and thinking about the consequences of your actions. And you've felt a bit of that spark you can get when you're around someone who you kind of just 'click' with but you can't quite say why. That wants to be there with a boyfriend too, not just a physical attraction. You know what to look for, then? But mate, don't flirt with him. He's only flesh-and-blood, teacher or not. And it won't end well.
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My mom and dad usually make me wanna cry. I'm crying right now because they don't seem like they want to help me. What do I do? (link)
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OK. Are you finding a lot of things making you feel a bit tearful and emotional lately? Romantic/tragic moments in movies? Sad, or beautiful songs? Is the 'help' you feel mom and dad aren't giving right now a massive issue, that is really getting to you? Or something quite small? Something you could maybe resolve on your own with some effort? We do have moments, spells and longer periods when we do 'feel more deeply' and are more sensitive, to criticism, brush-off's, and a being a bit neglected. That's all quite natural. Doesn't mean you are having some sort of crisis/breakdown. Maybe at another time, exactly the same situation that is making you cry now would be like water shedding off a duck's back. Wouldn't worry you one bit? It might be a good idea to identify your reactions and isolate them from the actual situations that are causing them. If they seem, in all honesty like what you would call 'an over-reaction' in someone else then I'd let the tearful moments pass right now. As it's just a mood-thing and these can and will turn and turn again all through life. Some people are always prone to an certain over-sensitivity. Some are better at disguising it (or they learn to be). Some are as 'thick-skinned as an elephant', as you might say, and hardly ever have sensitive moments!
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Hi 🙂...You know how i told you that last year our teacher gave everyone one of our classmate's name, and we should talk to this person more and help this person etc and he gave me HIM, so now we exchanged some gifts between each other, something like secret santa , so in the morning i came to the classroom, i was talking to my friend and HE came to me and HE gave me some gift, so teacher must've chosen HIM as my secret santa 😟 why ???...Is it just a coincidence ?....Btw how can stop having feelings for him and fall in love with someone else ? and sorry if im bothering you (link)
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Hi! Don't worry, you aren't bothering me at all. It's nice to talk. It is hard to say. It might be a coincidence. But teachers are very tuned-in to what happens in their class and this teacher obviously likes using these friendship/outreach/empathy building type exercises. It could be he noticed you two seemed to work in the last one? I'm guessing really, it is impossible to say for certain either way. But it has added to, and not taken away from your awareness of each other, which can't be bad! Regarding instantly stopping your feelings, that really is impossible! They are not things we can turn-on and turn-off at will like a light bulb. You might get together and find things really click. Would be great if you did. You might get together and find they do not, and then the feelings will stop, because you have been there, tried it, but it's not really what/who you expected. Falling in love with someone else will stop them dead. You will not even give him a thought when you are around the new guy. But we cannot arrange a dreamy guy to come and sweep you off your feet on demand! Sometimes the feelings just die off slowly, if there are no new experiences and/or contact to feed them. You do not notice it, and you do not wake up one morning thinking "Hey! I'm over my feelings for him!" It is a gradual thing, over time. How about you do not try to stop loving this guy? You take every opportunity to attract and interest him as and when it comes along, of course. But you do not dwell on it if they do not arise. And do not break your heart if he is not the one. Most of all, keep your mind (and eyes!) open to others. If a great guy shows up and things just seem to drop into place, and things look promising, definitely DO NOT let your feelings for the first guy hold you back. Give the new guy all your attention and affection. If he deserves it, naturally! You sound a loving and very considerate/thoughtful person in your questions. That is something very special to bring to a relationship so do not waste it on somebody who does not deserve it. Meaning, somebody who does not deserve YOU! Happy Xmas by they way.
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Hi :).. i don t think I will arrange some meeting with him, bc it hurts me SO MUCH,it makes me so depressed, he thinks im okay bc i try to act happy, laugh before him, but im not, i would like tell him that i feel depressed, But idont know what to do, i dont think i cant bear seeing him in class everyday anymore :(( i would feel ashamed telling him that im depressed,the saying out of sight, out of mind would help but i see him everyday,today we went to church on our first period (bc we go attend church school), and he's always ministrant, and the songs they play there seems sad to him, and when i look at him , i feel i would start crying before everyone :/....And last year our teacher gave us one name od one of the classmates and we should help this person , talk to him more, and the teacher gave HIM my name, and on valentimes date he gave me note saying: "im glad you are", i thought that IT was bc he likes me and in that moment i started to feel something more fór him , and when i confessed to him about my feeling, i gave HIM note saying also "im glad you are" bc i thought he liked me, But then i found out that i was the person that teacher gave HIM , so maybe he gave me valentines note bc of it and i feel awkward and ashamed,why he us so friendly to ako girls in my class and to me is distant :// (link)
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Hi! Perhaps the valentine note from him was because the teacher nominated you, but that does not prove he does not care for you. Being more friendly to other girls in class does not prove much either way. Does he just seem to be more friendly to your eye? I assume none of them are actually his girlfriend? And it is easier for guys to be more friendly with girls they are not crazy about than the one they are. We can be awkward and not so comfortable around the girl we would most like to be with sometimes because there is sort of 'more at stake' as you could say. We care more about how they see us and the outcome. Staying bright and happy and up-beat when he is around is a very good idea, even if it is a bit of an act. We like being around happy people with a positive attitude. We sometimes tend to avoid down and depressing people. So don't suddenly tell him you are depressed, because of him and how you feel about him. Stay up-beat and attract his attention that way. Obviously, I cannot tell you everything will work out the way you want. But when I read what you have said in your questions I should say you are still very much in the game, and in there with as much chance as any other girl in class. Keep looking for any opportunity to talk with him, engage with him, get on-board with any group activity he is in, and so on. Make your presence felt. But in a good way. For goodness sake don't get all soulful and sorrowful/depressive looking whenever he is around. That is giving entirely the wrong message mate! He won't want a miserable girlfriend, will he? Hang on in there, and keep looking out for those opportunities. X
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Today me and my niece got in a fight. Shes 6 years old. She stays in a different city and slept over by us. She kept having an attitude and then when i was geaching her to swim we got in a fight. She kept going on that my house is so boring so i said if shes so bored she can then go back to her dad. And we kept fighting. Eventually she started crying and said she wants to go home and we spoke and cuddled and we seemed alright and then she went home. I feel really awful about it because i dont see her much and i really didnt want to hurt her shes like my little best friend. Do you think she'll still remember about it tomorrow? Or not want to come again? (link)
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It's not that usual for a child of develop and bear a lifelong grudge against an older person based on one bad experience. Their attention span is not really that long, and their responses to good and bad experiences is often passionate, but somewhat short-lived! You (as an older, authority figure) are either hero or zero for a brief spell, and either way you tend to begin with a clean sheet on the next encounter. Perhaps you could send her mum an email (to be reported to her, of course!), saying sorry we got into a silly fight before we parted...love you...can't wait for next time...let me know what you'd like to do...etc. That will probably make her feel awfully grown-up and important, and planning the next meeting. Or you could just let it go. It's all hate you...love you....hate you again...and so on... at that age but like we said, the emotions are as fleeting as they are powerful in the moment.
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my bus driver wanted a Christmas card from me, I do like him. he has been flirting with me since the summer of 16. well I made a card for him and i just signed the card always, sasha and I attached a candy cane to the front of it.but I wanted to ask him to go for coffee and give him my number but I don't want too come off as desperate. so I decided not to do that. I feel the man should take the lead. is this true or false if a man is truly interested in a woman he will ask her out regardless of how shy he is? (link)
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It's certainly not the case that a guy will just go ahead and ask a girl out if he really likes her, and it is not a mark of depth of feeling either. Asking may just be a casual 'punt' in which the answer of yes or no is of little concern to him either way. And in fact, in such cases it is indeed very easy for the guy to ask, since the outcome is of little real consequence to him. We struggle with, and feel most nervous over the things we value most, and in which we therefore have more than a casual interest in the outcome. So do guys have insecurities? What are our fears? Well, in cases like this it's the same as for girls. The fear is the fundamentally human 'fear of rejection'. We do not like rejection. From anyone. Least of all, from someone whose high regard we wish to win. Someone whose approval and acceptance we desire, perhaps very greatly. It may seem the better option in our minds to 'never know for sure'. Then at least the possibility will always be there, in some way. The rejection, if it comes will swiftly and finally end all our hopes. So, will a guy go on 'not asking' purely because the fear of asking and receiving a rejection is just too high? Yes. I'm afraid we do sometimes. Would we feel all wrong if the girl somehow cleared the path ahead with the right words? Or would we think she was pushy, predatory or slutty? When we really care about the outcome it's option one every time. Then we're silently begging 'Please....help me out here! Say something or do something to let me know I won't get a crushing knock-back. If you do I'll make all the running from that second on. You see if I don't." Is that a fair reply? You might be a bit surprised, since another big part of being a guy is really not talking the way I am to you right now and admitting stuff like this. That we get scared too. And quite often our fears and insecurities are fundamentally the same as you girls.
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I had really bad flu a few months ago and it caused a lot of earwax in my ear. Over a while it got worse and worse and i got flu a few times after that. The first time i had flu thatbit started the doctor couldnt see my eardrum because it was too much and obviously its gotten worse over the months. We could only get an appt to drain it late january. Lately my ear has been hurting really badly and it gets blocked really quickly. Just lying on that side makes my ear blocked. I also have hearing problems in that ear.
Can to much earwax cause a burst eardrum? And also how do i help this until i drain it? Doctor said i mustnt use Eardrops or cotton swabs (link)
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So far as I'm aware an excess earwax will not actually burst an eardrum. But it will itch, hurt, cause buzzing and ringing, impair your hearing etc. Obviously, no probing with swabs. This can damage the inner ear, will impact the wax harder and the irritation will make your ear produce more wax (it produces wax to protect the inner canal etc). It's a no-win. Eardrops won't have much effect on a large amount of hard wax.They generally only soften the outside which, unless removed will quite quickly harden again. It would be a good idea to try and get the appointment moved forward. Point out that it is becoming very painful. Wax will give you a very significant loss of hearing performance. And the side you sleep/lay on will indeed be very blocked after a while. Your hearing in that ear may well be very poor when you wake up/get up. See if you can hurry them up with that draining, and have the doctor have a good look inside.
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14/f. Virgin.
Im very horny and i dont have a boyfriend. I want someone experienced and most older men have a big oenis so it would hurt a little and i want that. How do i get a man to have sex with me? It can be anyone - relative, teacher, random etc (link)
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Hey! Think about what you're saying and planning here! It's not too difficult for a girl to find a guy willing to have sex with her. But if you go about it with this attitude there's a fatal flaw. You're only going to attract guys who basically just want to use you for sex and no more. Now I can guarantee however experienced and/or well-endowed your 'older lover' is, this isn't going to make you feel special, valued, loved or indeed even very good about yourself at all. All you're going to feel is used. Come on. You can do better than that. You deserve better than that.
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I'm 13 female and horny a lot! But when I masturbate I still am horny what should I do!? And I want sex should I find a guy to have sex with me? (link)
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Hi there. Your thoughts of finding some random guy to have sex with are not a great idea, and I'm not going to say it's because of your age. I'm sure you do feel horny quite a lot at 13. But whether she's 13, 23...43....whatever, hardly any woman finds having sex with random guys just for the sake of 'having sex' very satisfying, and it virtually never makes them feel very good about themselves either. It is much better to satisfy those urges and needs by masturbating. And 'saving sex' as you might say, for when the right guy comes along. Then it will be a much more pleasurable experience. One you'll both share and enjoy. And you'll feel good about yourself afterwards too!
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Currnetly im ingnoring him, avoiding eye contact with him bc it hurts me that he talks normally to every girl in my class, he always štart conversation with me but he doesnt :/, i want to be friend with him but i think he likes other girl in my class, i dont know.it fór surr bu he acts like it, and im kinda mad at him, even though i knowmits not his fault, i would want to be alone with him to tak to him alone, and say why i act like this, but we dont múch lessons with him, and he is always surronded with him friend, so i dont know how would i arranged it, i really want to be friend with him bc the next year we graduate and then maybe i wont see him again :(( (link)
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Perhaps the best way to arrange a one-to-one meeting would be through another friend you share. A girl-friend? She could maybe tell him you want to talk him alone and arrange a time and place. Make sure it is a girl-friend you trust. It is a quite normal to see all the other girls he talks to as a threat, and to feel a bit jealous when you obviously really have your eye on him yourself. None of them are important one way or another if he unfortunately does not return your feelings. But on the happier side, none of them are a threat to you if you are the one he would like to be with. Looking and reading things into his general actions and body-language etc is usually not a great way to get answers. You could read the same things different ways on different days, depending on how you feel at the time. You need to arrange this chat, away from his friends. Could a friend pass a written note if they don't like the idea of setting it up? Know his phone number? If so a text would be good. Don't give anything away up front. Don't tell him what you want to actually talk about. That will hopefully arouse his interest enough to make the meeting. We are fascinated by 'mysteries' and like to resolve them. Which he will have to meet you to do. Good luck. X
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i have consulted 5 doctors all told me that you are absolutely negative because i have done all these tests after 11 months of exposure. my concern is some wrote in this forum that to get symptoms it will take 5 - 10 yrs then what is meaning of testing after 11 months??? (link)
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I think I can see the misunderstanding here. When the HIV virus enters the body there may be quite severe, or mild flu-like symptoms soon afterwards. Or there may be no symptoms whatsoever. The virus my not progress to the full-blown AIDS (which has very severe symptoms) for quite some time. Possibly years, 5 or 10 is feasible. What the tests look for is presence of the HIV virus. This will certainly not remain dormant, undetectable to tests for years. It shows it's presence in the tests very quickly. Negative means you do not have the HIV virus in you. So you will not develop AIDS symptoms in five or ten years. Or indeed ever. Unless you are exposed to the virus again and it does find receptive cells on this occasion. Again, a test will be made for presence of the HIV virus and again the result will be quickly conclusive, one way or the other. Hope you are reassured? If we could contract the HIV virus and carry it undetectable for five years plus then the HIV/AIDS situation would be impossible to either monitor or control (either control socially or control as well as we can in life-expectancy terms with medication. Since once it progresses to full-blown AIDS there is really nothing that can be done). Unless you believe you have been exposed AFTER testing, relax and believe the doctors that you are HIV-negative.
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im girl 17,i told my classmate(boy) who is also my crush in the concrete i gave him a note, saying i like him..two days later, i asked him to talk about it bc he didnt give any respond and i wanted to how he feels ,during school,i asked him if we could go and talk somewhere private , he said it is nice that i told him about my feelings for him,he also told me that he know how hard it must´ve been for me to hide my feelings from him.then he said he doesnt have time for relationship bc he has activites besides school (he plays guitar, he dances)and also he told me he firstly wants to develop more spiritually..(if that makes sense) bc we go to catholic church ,and then he hugged me saying that we should continue to be friends and then i deleted him from my friends on fb during summer holidays bc i was always checking if he is online.now is new school year and he found out i removed him from my friends on fb, and he texted me why i did that, and if he did something wrong he is sorry , i told him i did it bc it hurts me and that i dont want to be friends, and he said it´s ok, i thought it would hurt less, but it hurts me more ,now i ignore him bc i dont know how to act to him..he sent me friend request on fb but i didnt accept it yet..he was good friend to me before i told him about my feelings..please help me should i be his friend again or not? if yes what should i tell him,why i suddenly accepted his friend request on fb,and also today is his birthday, should i wish him happy birthday even i removed him from my friends??..thanks for help :) (link)
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It sounds to me like the guy was really upfront and honest about the way he handled you telling him about the crush. He could have been very deceptive, led you on never meaning it to be a long relationship, etc etc. You get the picture? So I'm assuming a relationship (which does take a good deal of time commitment) just isn't on the cards for him right now. There's 'stuff he wants/needs to do' and it won't fit around a girlfriend. It's not you he has rejected (as you might say) but 'girlfriends'. Clearly your feelings were and are strong, and deleting contact is understandable when you are spending lots of time looking him up on line etc. It only hurts you more. I definitely do not think you should cut off contact with him, and he seems upset because you have. Thinking he's done something to offend you. I imagine he doesn't think it was the fact that he 'turned you down' (in effect). He believes that has all been 'processed' already? Stay friends for sure. He's still regarding your feelings, obviously. More than some guys respect and regard their actual girlfriend's feelings! Who knows? Many a solid relationship has emerged when the situation becomes more suitable. Many a life-long and very strong girl-guy relationship exists between people who were never lovers in the physical sense. Obviously, avoid the close monitoring and/or strong signals/conversations that you want the full-on relationship. Don't wish your life away. And of course, if a really great guy happens to appear don't pass him by. Let's say this guy is a sound, likeable guy. There 'in the background'. Stay friendly, and in touch. Keeping it light and friendly. Who would want to guess at or predict what the future holds? Not me, ever! If you cut him dead then you've effectively taken a good guy (even just a great-friend good-guy) out of your life. We need good guys and good girls around us. You just can't have too many! Best of luck mate.
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So, I have a super fast metabolism. I don't know what to do, because I want to gain weight so very badly. I absolutely HATE being so skinny. My dream body is much bigger.
Does anyone know what I can do? Should I eat more junk food (because I honestly don't eat much of it)? Just please any help would be appreciated.
I'm 19/female and 120lbs/5"5. (link)
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I definitely would not advise cramming junk food into yourself. You'll gain weight. But not in the places you want to. And it will be hard work shedding it too. Empty carbs, fat and sugar. Your body will just try to store the excess energy you are taking in as fat. Your body won't draw on that reserve of fat until you force it to. Meaning a strict diet. You'll weigh more, sure enough but think about how you will look. Flabby. Out of shape. And out of condition, as junk food is not condition-friendly either, to put it mildly! Protein, and useful carbohydrate is what you need. Combined with a worked out exercise regime. Convert the energy to muscle. Muscle mass weighs more than fat too, so you'll get a weight increase. Relax. I'm not saying you should turn yourself into some sort of female body-builder. With bulging biceps and a six-pack etc. Living at the gym. A much gentler regime that builds muscle-tone is what is needed, rather than sheer volume. Tone is what will give you a 'nice shape'. Fat, from the junk food binges will not attach itself to areas which give you a nice shape at all. Quite the opposite. You know what I'm talking about here, I'm sure. Your height, you are stuck with. Although 5,5 strikes me a fair enough height for a woman to be. Rather nice in fact. 'Toned' doesn't mean 'amazonian/warrior goddess' standing six feet tall. Plus, at 5'5 you can wear heels without being taller than the guys. Which less-tall guys find a bit intimidating!
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hi,
I read your advice and thanks so much....he doesn't wear a ring, but seeing that he is a bus driver I don't think id wear mine either...the way he is extra giddy towards me when he sees me...I don't think he is with anyone...and the sighs to me is saying you still don't get it.....im attracted to him, not just his to his teeth...lol. if I was to say anything to him, id rather do it when the bus is empty...but I guess I could take a chance....when I see him again...well, I think ill take your advice and push it a lil bit further and see what happens...thanks so much!!! (link)
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Sounds an excellent plan. Building up the right atmosphere for a bit of interaction/communication to test the water, as you might say. Good luck. It's all like a game of golf. You won't make every long or tricky putt, true. But you'll sure miss 100% of every one you don't take on, eh??
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My breasts are around a 38AA and my butt isn't exactly big. (I'm very skinny) I like the idea of my body being "cute" instead of "sexy," but I'm still very insecure about it. How can I be more confident in my own skin? I'm a 19 year old female, by the way. (link)
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I would say play to your strengths. We feel pretty good when we make the most of the cards we have. Wishing we had different cards is pointless and demoralising. Embrace 'cute-sexy' I say! In your style, your outfits, your attitude...in your whole 'look' as it were. What's all this 'real you'stuff actually mean, anyway? Cute-sexy IS the real YOU! Leave voluptuous/curvy-sexy to others. It's a 'square pegs in round holes' situation. They just don't fit properly so why keep trying to bang them in?? Personally, I think cute-sexy is just adorable. And I doubt I'm the only one of this opinion either. Channel the inner cutie mate!
ps. Try googling actress Audrey Hepburn. The high-priestess of cute-sexy! Supremely confident and comfortable in her skin. Adored by blokes and admired by other women alike. How good is that?
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I've never worked a register before and this is my first job. The manager said that he's giving me a chance with this job since I have no experience. I really don't want to mess this up and have them fire me because I don't know what I'm doing. He told me that I always need to be busy, even when there's no customers. (link)
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You'll be fine. If you enter the amount the customer gives you (the 'tender') the point-of-sale gear will tell you what change to give. You just count it out. Card sales, you cant mis-tender or give wrong change. It will either pass or fail. If it fails, it's try again. If they haven't got enough cash in their account then it's either an alternative payment type (different card, or cash) or they don't get their stuff! Busy when it's not busy usually means 'filling and facing-up'. Replacing the sold fast-sellers, and puling the stuff to the front of the shelves in other words. And general 'housekeeping' around the store and your cashier area. Don't ever get involved in arguments. Stay at arms length as it were, and professional. Don't be bullied by awkward customers. There is a limit to what you can give them for the money they have and you can't exceed or fall below it, despite stuff about the customer 'always being right'. Don't take the bait, basically. So no insults back, swearing or indeed punching them! It might not feel like it at first, but within the shop procedure, you are in charge of every transaction. And each transaction is one on it's own, just that, however busy. Remember that. You'll be fine. Retail jobs aren't usually especially well-paid, but they are always there. And a bit of customer-facing/retail experience can often be of service to you at different time of your life. Most people can get good enough in about two or three weeks. You're no different. By far the biggest reason a boss will let a cashier go is that they just don't turn-up to do their shift, or they are persistently very late. This upsets the cashier due to 'go off' and messes up the running of the store. Mistakes, we all make. Honesty is important. Accidentally losing ten dollars will get a talking to from the boss. Stuffing just one dollar in your own pocket will get will get you dismissed on the spot, even though it's much less of a loss. Go and give it your best shot. And don't be late for your shift!!
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My cat has red discoloration in his eye and his eye is very cloudy, but the other one seems completely normal. Any idea what could be causing this? And what's the severity of it? (link)
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I found something similar myself once, the cat had got one eye wounded in fighting another cat, the vet thought most probable. He was always a fighting sort. The redness went down and he had some eye drops too. The pupil of his damaged eye improved a lot with the drops but always kept a hint of a slightly grey cloudy look which you could spot when his pupil was wide. There wasn't any way to say for sure if his vision was impaired in that eye. He appeared 'not blind' in it, but that's all we can ever really say. He knew I guess, but of course wouldn't ever be able to tell a soul! I would definitely take him to a vet if it doesn't clear or markedly improve quick. It could be any number of things causing it. And you'll want to know the score so you can give him the best chance of successful treatment.
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