I have a degree in Biomedical Engineering and Psychology from Northwestern University. I finished medical school and completed my M.D. at the University of Cincinnati College of Medicine. I am currently in my residency for surgery- hopefully to be specializing in neurosurgery.
I want to answer questions on medical type questions. I'm a big fan of Dr. Drew Pinsky on Love Line and would like to help younger people from the mistakes I see a lot of young people do when they come into my ER.
Gender: Male
Location: I'm from all over.
Occupation: Physician- Surgeon
Age: 29
AIM: ArunKSherma
Member Since: January 23, 2005
Answers: 188
Last Update: January 2, 2009
Visitors: 18502
Main Categories:
Health
Mental health
Fitness
View All
Favorite Columnists
hailebop
Melanie4981
|
| |
|
The other night i was over my friend's house and the boys that were there left 2 cans of chew there. I know this is gross but we deicded to try it. At first it was only a little bit of peach stuff that we kept in for 30 mins, then right after we took that out we put in a big thing of mint in for 30 mins, then peach, and then mint again and i got real dizzy and like we passed out on the ground. Is chewing a couple times that day going to have any effect on us in the long-run or anything like that? (link)
|
In the long run, this small encounter is not going to have an effect. A lot of chewing tobacco's have a fiberglass type material which causes "scratches" on your gums so that the nicotine and other things can get a better way + faster way into the blood.
The reason you passed out is because you had a "nicotine overdose", which can effect the brain temporarily. However, it doesn't have any long term effects if that is the only time you do it. However, if you do continue doing it, you do increase the risk of mouth, jaw, tongue, lip cancers. (I did Head and Neck Surgery and we had to do a lot of surgery on smokers and chewers some of them really bad.)
Take care,
Arun
|
i have a really small butt are they are any excersises that can make it bigger? I know of hte one where u lay down like you're doing a situp and just lift up..does this work?
--thanks (link)
|
It has a lot to do with genetics, however, you could eat more to help with that. However, to exercise the gluteal (butt) muscles, the best exercise is the reverse leg kick.
You star on your hands and knees, then you kick your foot back- raising your foot to the sky behind you. You can do this with some ankle weights to really help.
Also don't forget hte surrounding muscles- you slim these down (your back, legs) and your butt will look slightly larger.
Best of luck,
Arun
|
Hey, I'm 13/f and I think that my best friend might be gay. I mean, she's rather stalker-like, won't stop givin me stupid out-of-the-blue hugs, and keeps telling me online that she loves me. It's making me feel really uncomfortable and I have NO clue what to do.
I rate 5's for everyone.. (link)
|
I think that it is time to have a personal talk with her. You don't want to pass judgment on her though, because this is a time of self sexual discovery. You don't want to accuse her of being homosexual, but you don't want to deny her of being that either. I would talk to her in a place where you can't be overheard. Tell her that you're concerned about her general sexual preference. If you show you're not "weirded" out by it, she may confide in you about the confusion that she may feel.
She may reveal that she has homosexual or bisexual feelings, but that is normal. It is a sexual preference. During the conversation, you may also say that you don't feel comfortable the touching etc.
Hopefully things will work out the way that's best for you and her.
Yours,
Arun
|
|
Okay lets start my saying im 13 years old. I am dating a 17 year old. My parents along with his parents think it's a bad idea because of the age difference. I havent been able to get ahold of him and talk to him about it. I also like some one who is closer to my age. But does kind of bad things like drinking isnt a problem to me since i do it but he does ciggerates and weed and stuff. He told me he wouldnt pressures me in to anything and he told me he likes me to.HELP ME IM CONFUSSED!!! (link)
|
I'm not going to assume that you guys are sexually active with each other. I would love to think that this guy really only has the utmost noble wants from you. The danger is if you guys are sexually active and continue to see each other, in most states, it is illegal for a 18 year old and a 13/14 year old to see each other in that way. Your parents could file charges against him. If you guys do have another connection though- and can abstain from that kind of activity till you're of age- that's great.
The age difference doesn't make much of a difference once you're both over 18. I have friends who are going out with 18yo's (ie 8 year age difference).
I think that the two of you really need to talk to each other. I'm assuming that you're in middle school and he is in high school, so in school might be difficult. However, you just need to find a time to talk about where your relationship is going- and all the consequences that can occur from it.
I've seen a lot of self- destructive kids who sound like the guy that is your age. At that age though, I don't know if he is willing to give up his addictions for you. ALthough you drink (hopefully just socially and its not becoming a problem), when it involves an addiction (which ciggies are known to do), it becomes very difficult to fight that for his love. It is a battle for a lot of older women who have someone like that in their life so I can't imagine how hard it is for someone your age. He will try to make you smoke and drink, because he wants a companion on the things that he love (why make him choose when he can combine the two).
I know that it is not an easy decision, but whatever you choose, I wish you happiness in it.
Yours,
Arun
|
|
I been dating this guy for 2 months and it was going really good untill I found this letter that he wrote my best friend ( that he like befor) he wrote that he really like her and everthing.When I saw that I was going to die.I need help!!!!!! I'm tried of getting hurt. WHAT DO I DO!!!!!!!! (link)
|
I'm confused- did he write the letter before the two of you were going on? Did he start going out with you because he thought he could get closer to your friend?
There are a lot of questions that I think that you have for it. It all depends on how you found the letter though, when you approach him. If it was just out where anyone can see it, then you need to ask him about it. You have to be honest and not show that you're really hurt. You want to be as intellectual as possible- so that he knows that he doesn't need to make you feel better. I think that the both of you need an honest discussion with each other, with at little reactive emotion as possible. (have the discussion in a public place so the both of you are more likely to not over-react, especially him).
However, I still think that there might have been an ulterior motive in his dating you (however, 2 mos is a long time). Maybe he liked your friend, started dating you, and then really liked you a lot more? I know that you must have given him your heart, and you feel that he didn't protect that enough. I can only say that you need to have hope and faith that one day there will be a guy who will accept your heart, protect with his soul, and be thankful everyday that you're in his life.
Yours,
Arun
|
i'v been going out with a girl for like a week so should i get her some thing for valentines and if i should then what?
(link)
|
I dont' know how much you really want to spend, but you could always just get a single red rose with a CD of songs that remind you of her (she'll love listening to it, knowing that you listen to it thinking of her). A teddy bear, depending on size, could be appropriate, however, you may want to wait on that. Chocolates are fine, but it depends on the girl.
Best of luck,
Arun
|
|
i have a bit of hair on my lower back, and its like blonde so its not gorilla, but you can see it...is that normal/really wierd? i always feel so self consious about it because im not a hairy person at all! but what do guys think about that? do they prefer a bald-body girl? hehe (link)
|
that is completely normal. It is a "relic" from our chimp ancestors. Everyone has hair over their body, but due to hormonal changes this hair can grow longer and darker (esp in guys). It is blond so it should blend nicely with your skin and is almost translucent.
I don't think that guys mind about a little hair that is that fine on your lower back. Most guys just prefer a girl who keeps herself well.
Best of luck,
Arun
|
dear advicenators,
can u please shatter some myth about the west? yeah i mean especially u.s.a, is the life very easy outhere? is education very flexible and simple? are people here very carefree?do people care about knowing other cultures etc? is marraige just a certificate for legal sex? u get married today and divorced tomorrow?do movies reflect the real u.s.a.? (link)
|
I'm assuming that you're not from a Western Culture. My parents came here from India with not that much to their name. It is true what they say though that this is the land of opportunity. My parents were incredibly educated from India and were able to make a comfortable life for our family. However, it is true what the cliche says, your life is only as good as you make it, and willing to work for it (or something like that).
Everyone is eligible to get an education when they are young. It is a shame that not everyone takes advantage of it. Of course, ther eare some public schools that aren't very good, but it is still an education if you are willing to put time into it. The nice thing is that if you can, you can choose where you live and where you go to school (yes, this is sometimes money dependent). There are so many colleges here though that most people if they wanted to, could find a college that they coudl go to.
Once again, it depends on the person if they want to learn about other cultures or not. I know a lot of my friends are interested in other cultures, but it all depends on the person.
Marriage is another story. It is sexually more liberal here than other places in the world, but compared to some areas, USA is still kind of "prudish". Some people do marry for the right reasons though- love and family. IN a way, I think a lot of Americans still want that marriage and happy life, it just sometimes doesn't work all the time.
The movies do reflect some things, but mostly it does not- because the movies are only glimpses. The only way to really appreciate American life is to be in it yourself.
Yours,
Arun (Hindu Indian American) :)
|
|
Can you go to your regular doctor to get on a birth control pill or do you have to go to a gyno.? (link)
|
Any licensed physician can write you a prescription for birth control pills (including the doctors at Planned Parenthood). The reason why an OBGYN might be better to see is that he/she will understand the hormonal changs better than a regular doc would. They spend more than 5 years training studying that after medical school. Also, they will also get a initial pap smear on you so that when you go for your annual check up they know what is "normal" for you so that they can compare it to your old results.
Best of luck,
Arun
|
|
i IMed this guy who likes me (and i like him) last nite and he didn't respond so he called me a little later and i was sleeping and i guess i sounded like it and he asked me if i was sleeping and i said no and then he was like..i think u r and i said no! so now i feel dumb, should i tell him i musta been sleep talking or what? haha i'm a loser.. (link)
|
Tell him that you were exhausted last night but you really wanted to talk to him and didn't want to miss this chance. However, since he called you- you can call him.
Just tell him that you were so happy that he called and that you weren't fully awake to talk to him, because you really wanted to.
Best of luck to you.
Yours,
Arun
|
|
how do i get better balance and posture?! are there any exercises?! (link)
|
The best exercises to get balance is what they call core exercises. These are the types that you do with the big rubber balls. They force you to use all the muscles in your trunk (back, chest, abs, etc.) so that they learn to balance and get strong on themselves.
Also, for better posture, you should sit in hard back chairs or no back at all. This forces you to keep your back straight. Soft chairs are horrible b/c you're more likely to slouch. Make sure that your feet are flat on the floor and that your knees are at a 90 degree angle. This should help you.
Best of luck,
Arun
|
I'm depressed because my life has evolved to be all about studying (I am a dedicated nursing student), I have low self-esteem, the crowd in my school I do not get along with (there is a term in the philippines called "jologs" meaning they are poor), I'm super bored, i feel overscheduled (my class is from Mon-Sat), I come from a dysfunctional family (can't talk to anyone about problems) and life just seems so empty and a burden. Everyday it is hard just to get up, and it is hard to sleep too. I've been depressed since December. Now, I think I need help to snap out of it.
Are there sure-fire remedies for depression? (link)
|
Your schedule sounds like a lot like mine (since we're both in the medical field). It is a hard adjustment to make and sometimes it doesn't go exaclty the way that you want it to go.
Since you are in nursing school you're able to get free counseling at the University or school's psychiatric services. All Universities and graduate like programs have these services. You information will be confidential and you don't need to worry about how it will affect your future job prospects.
There is no sure fire way remedies for depression, unlike a lot of other diseases there is no single cause for it, and there is no single cure for it either. However, with the right combination of medication (which will not make you happy per se, but at least let you function (sleep, eat etc.)) you can work with a counselor on the other problems that you have. You're an independent person now and you have to come before your family. This is your life now and you can't let your family interfere with it.
Studying is important in nursing school, but you have to put aside time to go out and do things that you find fun. Set aside time to do things and schedule them into your calender. As for making friends, you'll make them as soon as you start approaching people. Talk to people and I'm sure that you'll find some people that you get along with. You have to have faith though in that. Nursing school, if its anything like medical school, reminds me of going back to high school in a way. You have to find the group of friends that you can fit with, but that takes a bit more time.
I wish you the best in your pursuits.
Yours,
Arun
|
|
I have a friend that ive known for several years. She lives a very long distance away from me and theres nothing i can do physcially for her. Her father makes her have sex with him on a nightly basis. Is there any way i can help her get help. Shes afraid of going against him, because he is paying for her college and everything. I love her to death. What can i do? (link)
|
The first thing that you have to assure for her is that she will be safe. In most cases of violence against women the perp is someone that the woman knows. Also, if she goes to the police right away this may force him to be more assaultive towards her. There are many battered women shelters in almost every city that she can go to be safe. Have her call Rape, Abuse, Incest National Network (RAINN), which she can get help and information of getting out of that situation. The number is 1800656HOPE. It is the group that Tori Amos is involved in and I know that I have referred several women there.
After she is in a safe place, she has to go to the hospital ER. In the ER we have sexual assault kits, which allows the doctor in the ER to start gathering evidence of the crime (because this is what it is). She can also get medical attention there, meds for STD, pregnancy issues (only place where you can get the morning after regiment). It is usually in the ER that she can contact the police. The police have to be brought in and she needs to file charges against him. This is a crime that I personally find worse than most.
As for college, she may have to go to the financial aid office and have her explain to them the situation. They can help her out with financing college b/c there is a lot of loans that she can get. Also, it would be best if she can get to stay with someone that she really trusts until all of this is settled- even with you.
You're a great friend and the fact that you brought this up shows that you truly are a caring person.
Hope that all works out with her and you. If you have any other questions- don't hesitate to ask.
Yours,
Arun
|
|
I know this isnt the most urgent message but since a few months ago ive been getting scabs on my scalp. Its really gross and sometimes when I move my hair around with my fingers they show and its disgusting and embarassing. Sometimes the scabs peel off and I find them in my hair and im thinking "What if someone sees me picking skin out of my hair?" and i get nervous. I also have acne all over my hairline in the front and thats also gross because when I want to pull my hair back they are all there and i have to put on alot of concealor so they wont be as noticeable.And even though im only 13 I think about it alot and sometimes I feel age doesnt matter as much when it comes to what you worry about because everyone is different. Alot of my friends say they dont notice it but I dont like it and its making me nervous and grossed out. What's wrong with me? What can I do to get rid of this stuff? (link)
|
The scaly part of your scalp may be something called tinea capitis (ringworm), which is common affliction in the scalp. It could be some other things including psoriasis or contact dermititis or could be another bug that is causing them. You will need to go to the doctor to get a prescription drug that you take by mouth to help. You may also want to try to use something like Selson Blue, which if you get from your doctor will have a higher amount of medicine in it and be a bit more effective (the stuff you get in the store is not as strong). If this appeared after you had changed any hair products, then you might be allergic to something in the product. Go to a shampoo that has minimal fragrance and chemicals (baby shampoo is clean for example).
Since your body is changing, that means that the level of hormones in your body is changing. One of these hormones is known to increase the amount of acne in the body. If you're female and you also have some irregularity in your menstrual period (although you may be too young to get it) you may want to get some birth control pills. However, that is a last resort. You can ask your doctor to help you by prescribing a good benzoyl peroxide face wash, a vitamin A cream for your face, and if its inflammed etc, he/she may also give you an antibiotic for it.
Other things that you can do is not to wear a lot of makeup b/c you may have sensitive skin and this is causing a bad reaction. Another thing is you can use an oat based face wash to remove excess oils (Bath and Bodyworks, I think has some). Also, you want to use a very clean, non-fragranced soap if you do not use the oat.
Best of luck,
Arun
|
|
im ADDICTED to sex. If I don't have it in less than at least a month, my stomach starts hurting, I become depressed..and everything. I know this sounds so stupid and don't call me a slut please...is this normal? or...what can i do to maybe hold my urge in? Because about every weekend I have sex (but with the same guy I always do it with) I`m also pregnate..and my hormones are going EXTRA crazy..15/f HELP!!!!!!! (link)
|
I know that this sounds like a cliche- but the first step is always to admit that you have a problem.
If you believe that you have a sexual addiction, then it is possible that you go through depression when you abstain. However, often many people that I have seen with sexual addiction had an underlying depression before the sexual addiction, but used sex as a way to forget about their problems, or to feel full to make up for that empty feeling that you have. If you do feel that you have depression, then it is best to get some counseling for that, which may also include some medication. Your doctor can help you with that medication problem, which may also help curb your sexual desire (aorgasmia is a common side effect of many anti-depressants- the inability to have an orgasm and a decreased libido).
If you don't want to go to a counselor you can go to sexual addicts anonymous (http://www.sexaa.org), where you can tell your story and begin your 12 steps to recovery. You'll be given a name of a sponsor that you will be able to call when you feel tempted. They have meetings in a lot of churches and schools so you can go and just talk to them or just sit and listen. They are of all ages there so you can feel comfortable there, including teenagers and also some pre-teens.
You're 15 and pregnant. I don't know how far along you are, but you need to decide if you're going to keep the baby or not. Most states do not allow abortions after the first trimester. If you do decide on the abortion you will have to get your parents permission or you can ask the court for an order that you can get one without permission (incredibly rare). If you do decide to keep the baby you need to tell your doctor and start seeing an OBGYN for pre-natal care. It is incredibly important to get this if you want to keep the baby. If you dont' have a doctor, you can contact your local children's hospital and see someone at the teen clinic there. If not you can get a hold of planned parenthood (www.plannedparenthood.org).
If you have any other problems- don't hesitate to ask.
Yours,
Arun
|
|
I think I have depression. I'm crying right now, and I'm not even sure why. I've been thinking about dea and searching on the internet for ways to commit suicide just now. I feel as though my life isn't worth living, I'm getting worse at school and I'm not going to ever get a job or get married because I'm worthless. I've always been shy but instead of acting upset and stuff in front of people I try to act happy so they don't notice that I feel so low, but it hurts, I feel as though they don't care even though they probably have no idea. I can't tell them, my friends are immature and just wouldn't understand. I feel as though everything's my fault, and like I'm the worst person in the world. I keep taking my anger out on my dad, I don't want to but sometimes I really can't help it; he was staring at me today and I just started yelling at him, it's like I've gone mad because I never used to shout at all. I don't ever go out anymore and I find chatting and going out boring and pointless. I can't ever concentrate on things for long; even television and chatting to people. I've got into a sleeping pattern a few months ago where every day, I can't sleep until at least 2:30AM, even on schoolnights, and then I go to bed because I'm so tired when I get home from school, and my parents won't let me have time off school to get into a normal pattern again. I've also been thinking about self-harm, I don't do that yet because I'm not sure how to, but I'm going to find out because I have nothing better to do. PS I've been feeling like this for about 4 months now, and no-one has noticed how I feel :| I'm really sorry this is so long but I need help. (link)
|
I'm afraid to say that it does sound like you are suffering from depression. It is a common disease that affects a lot of people. Since you've been feeling like this for so long- you definitely have to get help for it, because it seems to be recurrent not just a single episode.
I know that this sounds like something you've heard a lot of times- but hurting yourself is not the way to go. I have hurt myself because of my depression and any way that you try to get rid of the mental pain by physical means, if anything takes away the good and few things that you enjoy in your life. That is why a lot of depressed people do a lot of drugs, drink, and engage in behavior that you usually wouldn't do. If you really feel like you're going to hurt yourself or someone else, you need to go to the hospital ER, so that they can keep you safe. They'll give you a place to rest and just make sure that you can talk to someone and get some help. You can also call the national suicide hotline at: 1800273TALK.
You need to talk to a counselor or your doctor about how you are feeling. If anything they can direct you to someone that can get you some help. Your doctor may help you by starting you on some anti-depression medication and get you some counseling. Your doctor will keep whatever you say to him/her confidential and is only there for your best interest.
Depression is a real disease that can be treated, you made the first step with acknowledging that you may have it, now you need to get the help that you really need.
If you need anything don't hesitate to email/ask/IM.
Best of luck,
Arun
|
|
If given the choice between Italian and German...which one should I pick to learn? (link)
|
In school, I took French, which is not that useful to me now.
However, the language that you choose depends on what you want to do with it later...
German: great to know if you want to go into business. The USA does a lot more business with Germany (esp engineering and finance).
Italian: Is a great language to know esp if you're into the arts and theatre (opera originated in Italy and most times still performed there) it is also a much more romantic language.
If you are thinking of another language that will be useful to you in the United States I would suggest Spanish. I wish i had taken spanish b/c hispanics are the largest growing minority group in the country.
Good luck,
Arun
|
|
I noticed that in your column you foudn out a girl's BMI well I Would liek to fidn mine out but have no clue how... I am 5 foot 7 and 130 pounds. If you could find out for me or tell me how it'd be realli helpful. Thanks! (link)
|
No problem. The site that I use for under 18 year olds is http://www.keepkidshealthy.com/welcome/bmicalculator.html
Your BMI would be: 20.4, which is normal weight.
Yours,
Arun
|
Hi, umm... The other day i went to my fgriends house because it was O.K. with my mom. My mother is bipolar an sometimes she says things one minute then later another. Well that night i went to my friends houise after my mom said it was O.K. and then my friends and my sistersaid something about their being a parent at my friends house. I didnt know what was going on at the time so i just went with the flow an went to my friends house. A few hours later we went home it was 11:00 at night which was no big deal because we usually some home late. Well when i got home my mom said we werent aloud to go to my friends after a few hours earlier she said we could. So my mom got pissed and said to make new friends because we werent aloud around our friends anymore. She after that sent me an my sister to our rooms and i told my mom my story about it but she didnt believe me and she pulled out a belt and started wailing me on my back and it hurt like hell. So now im pissed that i cant hang out with my friends and my fucking back is killing me. What should i do. Please no messed up advice im really not in the mood thank you.
Peace out... (link)
|
This is a terrible situation which unfortunately I have seen before. I don't know exactly how old you are, but I'm going to assume that you're less than 18. This becomes a very tricky issue, because it all depends on how far you really want to go.
First, I'm concerned about your back. It is not acceptable for a parent to "wail" on a child no matter the age. If you really are concerned, then I would recommend that you go to the emergency room. However, because you are underage they are going to call child protective services and have them investigate the incidence. I don't know if this is a pattern that happens in your house, but it is not a safe environment. If you don't want to do this, then you have to get to an adult that you can trust and possibly have to stay with. The safety of your sister and you are the most important thing right now. If you have to, you can stay at your friends house and then have an adult talk to your mom about her problem (a school counselor or even your doctor- call your dr and discuss your concerns with him, but realize that he/she will be under the same law as the ER to call child services if there is a lot of physical abuse.)
As for your mom, if she is truly bipolar then she will have to go to her psychiatrist (or get one) and be placed on medication to "soothe" her out. She almost sounds that she may have some borderline personality issues. If she isn't getting help for it you have to talk to your doctor about her sudden mood swings. He or she may be able to convince your mom to get some help for that. If not, then you have to leave her until you get some help. She has a very serious problem and she needs to be treated for it. If her children leave her, then it may be the catalyst to get some help. However, you may have to contact child protective services to do so.
I wish that there was an easier way but it seems your mum might be out of control and would not be receptive to your saying that you think that she needs help.
If you need anything else, please let me know.
Yours,
Arun
|
got ne tips on puttin finger in my arse?
i want to experiment with it cos i herd its gr8 an i know all bout hygene an diseases but i wanna know how i actually do it so it feels good.
please help an i rate high (link)
|
Although, I'm a little hesitant to the question (if you're serious or not), I'll still answer the best that I can.
There is some research that has been shown that sexual excitement can be enhanced by stimulation of the nerves in the anus and rectum. It also depends on if you're male or female too, because the anatomy is slightly different.
If you're male, sexual gratification can be enhanced by placing pressure on the prostate gland which is in front of the anus and rectum. When you're in your in your 50's this is the rectal exam that we do to check your prostate. The technique is called milking the prostate. The prostate contributes a lot of the "fluid" for your sperm to live in. Although, stimulation of the prostate alone will not cause orgasm per se, but may enhance it with penile stimulation (intercourse or masturbation).
If you're female- the anatomy is different obviously. Women are able to experience different types of orgasms- there is clitoral, which is the most satisfactory, there is the grafenberg orgasm (G-spot)"about halfway between the back of pubic bone and the front of the cervix”. It can be found by inserting a finger or two in the vagina and pressing against the front wall of the vagina while aroused until a spot filled with blood is felt. There is also a minority of the population (1%) of women who are able to orgasm with just tactile stimulation of the nipples. The reason that in some women anal sex may be enjoyable is because by causing pressure against the front of the anal wall to compress the vaginal wall and cause stimulation to this area.
Best of luck to your experimentation.
-AK
|
|