Sweet_LiL_Angel's advice column

askSweet_LiL_Angel

advice column ask question view feedback favorite columnist advicenators

Q: Recently, my friend has been talking about how "hot" he thinks his teacher his. He keeps saying he fantasizes about her and he worships her. He said he likes walking past her room, he said he wants to buy the yearbook and school newsaper just to oogle and "jack off" at any pictures of her in them. Worst of all, he said he wishes she was a pedophile and if she wanted to molest him he'd be all for it. He also said one day he was leaving school he saw her walking towards her car, he took out his cellphone and snapped a pic of her secretly. Its kind of funny but its also kind of creepy to me. I always thought a teacher is someone you respect, not look at in that way. Is this normal? Or should I straighten him out?

Guy will be guys. We had this teacher when i was in middle school and all of the guys just loved her. stared at her all the time etc. i mean what he is doing is a l ittle obsessive. but its normal and long and he doesnt act on them towards her. and she doesnt act back.

Q: 15-F

So this girl text harassed me on Saturday.
She got my number from another girl and started texting me saying I was a
Poser.
Bitch.
Effed up.
Two faced.

I locked every one of her texts and I replied to every one but like three with 'K.'
No today, Tuesday, she was talking to a few people I know and I walked by with a friend, she says to the group of people
"God I want to beat the shit out of her"
Ect, ect. So I have a few witnesses.
Now tomorrow I'm going to my school principal about her.
What kind of trouble could she get in?

You could, go press charges. My sister in law's husband did that to my husband when my husband was sticking up for me and my son.

Q: ...is this a good or bad sign?

We were on our third date the other night and a few of his good guy friends happened to be there too (it was an obvious coincidence, not planned). I had never talked to any of them so after he introduced me I didn't say much, but while he carried on his conversation with them, he was a little aggressive about me taking his hands and pulling me closer to him. I was basically wrapped around him.

I know guys like to show off their girls in front of other guys and I know its good that he is so proud of me but most guys I know shy away from PDA around their friends, not move towards it. What does this say in terms of what he'd be like in a relationship? - We're 17 btw.

:)thaanks.

It sounds to be either he is over protective doing that to show his guy friends that you are his girl and your off limits or maybe he caught one of his guy friends staring at you something like that.

Q: My friend went to the hospital last night because she was bleeding and pregnant. She miscarried now and I'm completely shocked. I don't know what I should say to her but I'm certain that she is pretty upset about this whole ordeal. She hasn't called me just yet (her husband let me know) but I want to say something really nice and supportive when she does. I expect crying and the works.

What do I say to someone when they have a miscarriage? I know it's hard but other than, "I'm really sorry..." I'm lost!

sometimes the best thing to say is nothing at all hug her and let her know you are there for her no matter what it might not be much but sometimes saying something can make the other person cry because it makes them think about their miscarriage. My moms boyfriends daughter her and i were close and she lost her baby and had to deliever it. While she was pregnant she started getting sezuries and they wil never go away. shes on medication for the sezuires but she told me everytime she gets one she thinks about the miscarriage.

Q: If you get married AFTER you have children, should you go on a honeymoon? My boyfriend and I are expecting now and are not married. He wants to get married after the baby is born. I think that sounds alright, but then we won't be able to have a proper honeymoon, right? We can't just leave the baby somewhere and if we take the baby with us then it won't be us "getting away" to be together. What do you think?

Depends on when you go. How old will your child be. Honestly Im 18 my husbands 22 we both have children from previous relationships and are expecting we got married back in august we plan on taking a honeymoon next year and dont feell guilty if you go on a honeymoon that is husbands and your time together celebrate that you will spend the rest of your life together.

Q: ok. so i've been with my girlfriend for a very long time now and everything has been to good to be true up until recently. about 2 months ago she cheated on me while she was drunk and i was out of town. i caught her the next day when i saw the hickey on her neck. now im constantly thinking about that and i love her to much to end it. (blah blah blah, theres plenty of other fish in the sea, dont even tell me that im tired of hearing it". but today i've also come to realize that he may have given her an std which i too now have i think.... and still i love her to much to break up with her. so i just want to know. does anyone else think im being a dumbass about it all? you can be honest. i would love to hear it.. it would actually make me feel better to know that we love each other to much and even though she genuinely regrets it and is sorry for ever being stupid enough to risk our relationship, im still being stupid with my decision about to stay with her.

Well first off there are plenty of stds that are be treated. So go to your doctors and get tested. Now in my opinion I have been cheated on a lot in the past. and my last boyfriend before I got married cheated on me and it was tough I moved out I didn't trust him anymore. I went to see him one time after I caught him cheating on me and all he did was get me all emontional about he and I and then tried to have sex. I kicked him out my car and left. I believe if you cheat once you will do it again. Being drunk isnt an excuse. I dont think another person should be out drinking unless they are with there boyfriend and girlfriend. I think you are being any other normal person. you may love this person but how much does she love you by having sex with another man?

Q: alright i really need your help...my friend was on and off with this guy for about 2 years.towards the end of their relationship she fell pregnant and decided to keep the baby. so once she gave birth to her baby boy the father visited the baby once in like 3 weeks.he doesnt have a job and isnt looking for one,he doesnt have a car to drive and has all these pending tickets from the police that he hasnt paid and cant afford to pay.all he does is drink and smoke dope.
anyway in the end after like a month of not seeing his son because he didnt have transport to get to her house they decided that once the baby was 6 weeks old (i think) she would take him to his father's place every sunday for aday.my friend soon regreted this because the father doesnt take care of the boy,he smokes around the baby and doesnt wash his hands after hes been smoking doesnt pay for baby's food and dipers etc like the mum doesnt think hes capable to be a good father figure for the son. she txted him today and told him that shes going to stop taking the baby to him( she didnt want her son growing up like his father) so now the father is txting her back saying that if he doesnt see the boy hes going to kill himself. the mum told me that he always talks like that when they argue(always says hell kill himself)just for attention. she asked me for advice and i told her to ignore the txt and not to txt back. she listen to me and didnt but then he txtd her again and said hes going to do it and wrote her a letter for her to read after hes killed himself.she txtd me and asked me what to do.i told her that if shes sure that she doesnt wnat her baby seeing the father then not to txt back because if she does the father will just try talk her into letin him see the baby etc. she put me in an awkward position and asked me if i was sure it was the right thing to do and i told her its what id do.now im just really scared he might kill himself.i dont want to get blammed for anything.what should i do?should she let him see the baby even though he doesnt have a job doesnt pay for anything because thats abit useless i rkon.what should i say to my friend??i dont wnat to be too late.would he actually kill himself??omg help!!!just anything tell me plz!!1

Your friend needs to worry about herself and that baby boy. Her son's father isn't important and he says those things to make her feel like crap. Now next time he says it or if she still has the text messages take them down to your police station and file. Tell them you are to scared to leave you child with him because of the things he does and these text messages and he doesnt help. tell them about him smoking around the baby. Now ifyou are talking about smoking dope around the baby then your baby is getting a high just by being there. tell your friend to think about the child not her ex boyfriend.

MORE: your friends ex's family can't do anything. Tell her to press charges. he is just prooving him self unable to be a father figure. and his sister being verbally abusive is another reason her son shouldnt be in that home.

Q: My friend jacklin said i can use her account. This is her friend Jasmine. Is it wrong for a 14 year old girl to go out with a 17 year old guy? I mean i love him really much. I dotn want it to be wrong cause i lvoe him so much. IS it wrong for a 14 year old girl to go with a 17 year old?

Its not wrong. My husband is almost 23 and I am 18. Just make sure you like him and he likes you. A lot of older guys just want sex. But not all.

Q: I went to the doctor cause I thought I had a UTI (urinary tract infection) and they were supposed to do an examination of my, uh, area down there. When they told me that, I totally freaked out. I started crying and begged them not to. I had no idea where that even came from. Then I saw something in the room and somehow it triggered this really weird flashback. I KNOW it was real too. Apparently, I was molested when I was kid. That's great. Anyway, I can only remember this one part and I can't remember the person. I would have been 4 or 5 at the time I think. I know I was at a friend's house who had 2 older brothers, so I'm guessing it was one of them. I don't wanna assume anything though. This is just so frustrating! Ever since I had that flashback I can't get it out of my head. I don't want to tell my mom about this. Should I talk to someone or what? If I went to a therapist, could they somehow help me get back the rest of the memory?

You should go to a therapist but the problem with getting your memory back is more and likely you are blocking it out. I was raped 3 times never went to the police. I was to scared. I am writing a novel about my life growing. About the rapes and being a teenage mom. etc. that triggered I was working on my novel and watching law n order and there was a scene that the detective was about to be raped and got very detailed into what he was doing. but she didnt get raped. I was a mess i started crying. if you need to talk my email is ashaboo77@yahoo.com.. there is a lot of things you can do to help excepically a theripist. I dont know how close your mother and you are but hopefully closer than my mother and I. You should talk to her tell her what happen at the doctors. its important to tell someone. it was tough for me to tell my husband. i cope with mine by wanted rough sex. and my husband doesnt do that for that reason so i been having to cope with it by talking which is starting to finally help.

Q: I am 18 years old currently seeing a man for about 3 months now. Nothing has been made official, and i'd like to make it that way.. Problem: His last girlfriend of two years left him so "emotionally damaged" he says he'll never be as happy with me as he was with her. He's afraid to get into a realtionship, obviously. I can't just leave him because i've never felt this way about anyone before. If anyone has any advice or wants to know more, let me know, Thanks!

I know where the man you are seeing is coming from, but he has to trust you. you havent gave him a reason to not trust you. let his know this. he has to forget about the last and think about you.

Q: Is anyone a social worker or knows someone who is? I'm considering becoming one but I really would like to talk to a person in the field and get their first hand experience. Thanks!

I am going to be going to college to become a social worker. What type of social worked are you wanting to become? It is a hard job I had a cousin who was a social worker but quit because it was to hard on her. You have to beable to deal with the parents and the children who can be sad, angry, confused. When you do into the home you are always companied by a police officer incase things get out of hand. You have to have the heart to take children out of the home where they are being endangered and be able to talk to the children. There are also counslers for adult and children at counsling centers or schools. Social Worker for the elder etc. I strongly suggest psychology.. there is a list of classes you should take.. Just google classes i should take to become a social worker. good luck

Q:

my boyfriend's mother and my boyfriend do not get a long and they do not talk or see each other...Recently my boyfriend had received a bill in the mail from Verizon stating that he owes them over 600 dollars. What happened was his mother had put HIS name on the Verizon bill without his permission...not only am I steaming through the roof over this mess but what could we do to prevent anymore problems. His credit is completely ruined by his mothers lies and we have sent a letter to verizon stating that he does NOT have an account with them. The problem is..How do we know she is not going to do this again

Well you would sue Verizon wireless for one. they can't put anyone's name on the bill with out that persons permission. (sad im telling you to sue verizon when i work for them oh gosh) any ways. Then contact a lawyer and ask for advice on what you can do in the state you live in

Q: i'm a 19 year old girl in a huge tug of war emotionally. my boyfriend and i are either going to stay together or break up over this. i have been in a relationship for 2 years and during this time i lost a friend over a petty lie. he lied to me about something stupid and now my boyfriend completely distrusts him although i now realize it was a petty lie that i no longer care about and i want to be friends with him again. i have known my friend for 15 years! however, my boyfriend says he cannot allow me to be friends with him again and pretty much said its me or him. should i pick the person that love with all every inch of my heart, or my friend who i've known for 15 years?

Honestly I dated a guy a while back. who told me he didnt want me to see my mom any more because he didn't trust her. I broke up with him. I know you love your boyfriend but you should make the decison weather you should be able to be friends with your friend or not. it sounds to me as a jealousy problem.

Q: Hi there...

Sometimes after I exercise I am feeling dizzy. Is this because I could be dehydrated? Or because I've pushed myself too hard?

Thanks :)

It could be both. How are you eatting and are you doing warm up streches before and after?? if not make sure you do. drink plenty of water if you smoke dont. and take it easy if you feel over worked start slower

Q: hey again and i tried it but it did not work I fell like a piece of dog crap

you have to ignore them it will just take a while. for a couple of days just pretend they arent saying anything when they say that,

Q: Hi my name is jake, and my step brothers and real brother always call me fag, what should i do?

Well tell them you are not which I am sure you do and even if you were that is not the proper name for it. Ask them to please stop it bothers you. I have two brothers and I know what it is like to be picked on. If that doesnt work just ignore them no matter how mad you get no matter how angry you get just act like it doesnt bother you. They will get bored with calling you that harsh name and just leave you alone if they more on to something else egnore them again soon enough they will relize it doesnt even bother you. Just act like they are not in the same room as you.

Q: I have a 5 year-old daughter studying ballet and dreaming of going pro, her brother is 2.5 years old and she wants him to learn ballet. I also want him to learn, but have a husband that thinks it's gay... Any advice on any side?

Ballet helps with foot stance such as in sports l ike basketball and football.

Q: Ok, so my boyfriends dad offered to sell me a car, that was valued at 6000, for 1500. He said eh wanted to keep the insurance and title in his name until the car was paid off. I had no problem with that, but when i was on my way to take him somewhere, someone ran a red light and smashed the car. its gone, totalled. now he wants to pay his random bills with the settlement! My bf thinks im being selfish by thinking that he should keep the 1500 that he would have gotten from me out of the settlement, and give me the rest to get a new car. Am i being selfish, or is his dad being a real jerk? I really think that he only wanted to keep it in his name so that he could reap the benefits if I got in an accident. Help! dont want to see his face everyday while im so angry at the fact that he's gloating that hes making out on the deal!

he dropped the price a great deal 6000 dollar value only for 1500. I think you should be greatful for that and thank him and ask him if hed give you the chance to pay off another car from him sometime.

Q: I am 19 and have a 4 1/2 yr old daughter and my boyfriend has a 18 month old son that lives with us. I am now very pregnant with twins.

Today, after I had picked up the kids from pre-school and daycare, I went into the store to pick up some things for dinner. While I was picking up the baby and putting him in the cart, my little girl was playing by the quarter machines. A woman (probably about 30 years old) saw me and said, "Aren't you a little young to have a baby with another one on the way?" I didn't get a chance to say anything when my daughter came running over, screaming, "Mommy!!!" The woman just looked at me glared, shook her head, and left. I just wonder what people must think of me. Yes, I made some really poor choices in my life but I would like the chance to talk about it so maybe some other girls wouldn't go the same route I did. It's not uncommon for me to get crazy looks or stares when I'm out with the kids--or even just one of the kids! At least I'm taking full responsibility for my actions by raising my children the right way. It's just A LOT harder with me being so young. What would you think if you saw me in the supermarket? What would you say to me?

Thanks

I am in the same situation as you. Although I am 18 and my husband is 22. I have a 2 year old going on 3 and a 6 year old step son and I am pregnant. It is no ones buisness and people should keep their comments to there self. For those who can not we can't put our self down we have to stay strong to support these children. I just look at it as a gift from god. I belive everything happens for a reason even though we may never no that reason at least not right now. ignore them and ifyou get a that chance to speak up god bless you. I am going to go to school to become a social worker and well as write a novel.

Q: My brother has just found out that he has a cancer that is not operable. The doctor has explained that it will be a very painful death and my brother has a very short time before it takes him. He has everything in order and wishes to end it his own way. Our mother feels it's appropriate for him to do this and that we shouldn't interfere with this decision. I don't want to lose my brother though. I thought it would be great to spend the rest of his days just doing whatever he would love to do and not thinking twice about it (I would gladly put myself deep into debt for the end of his life to be pleasurable). What do I do? He seems very determined and has agreed to tell us when he will end his life. I expect this to be soon and I feel like I'm going to lose him too soon. Please, help me...

Talk to him about this. Tell him you don't want to lose him that way tell him you want to spend this rest of the days with him doing what ever he would like. Just let him know how much you love him.

bio

My name is Ashley. I am 22 years old. Ill be celebrating my 3rd 21st birthday June :) . I had my first child at 15. I got married at 18 and had another child shortly after. They have two different fathers. I am currently going threw a divorce. I moves states after we seperated ( ugly seperation) but I had no family in that state. I left everything except my beautiful babies and our clothes. I found a job up north and things are going good. I am dating. I have been in abusive situations. I am going to college for psychology and sociaology. Im here to listen help and give you advice ive been in alot of different situations and can relate to a lot.