I'll try my best to answer questions to the best of my ability. If I don't know the answer to your question, then I'll reasearch it or direct you to a columnist who can help you more. I really hope that I can help you with anything you might need assistance with. Feel free to email me with any questions, I'm glad to help with follow-up questions. I hope that I can ease your mind and help you through any sticky spots you might be in.
E-mail: peachy-keen@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: Toronto
Occupation: Student
Age: 17
Yahoo: moose_juice26
Member Since: April 11, 2005
Answers: 187
Last Update: June 29, 2008
Visitors: 11558
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I have a large mole which is larger than any other on my body. It is located near the vagina just above my thigh. It is oval shape and sticks out the skin. I am worried this is cancerous. But i've had it for years. I'm just not sure if it has grown in size.
Is it canerous? or am I worrying over nothing? (link)
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I would get it checked out by a doctor, just to be safe. If it is cancerous then maybe they can remove it and if it isn't then you will have peace of mind. I don't know wether its cancerous or not, but you should definately get it checked out. There is a chance that it is cancerous, but it might just be your average, everyday mole. Good Luck.
Love, Rainbow
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Ok, So I am 13 years old and since May 2005, I have found myself madly in love with no other than a 20 year old McDonalds worker. He has started to open up a little more in the past couple of months, and he gives me lots of hugs, flirts, and shows all the "signs" of love back. Yet he has never told me. This week we are supposed to go to the movies. My question is, Should I open up and tell him I love him or should I just wait until he does? (link)
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I know that you have already heard this about 20 times and that this isn't want you want to hear, but dating a 20 year old is not a good idea. I know that you have become a teen and you feel mature, but you are not ready for a relationship with a 20 year old. Like many other people have said, 20 year old men only have one thing on their mind. If you two were to become sexually involved then he could be charged and go to jail, even if you wanted to be involved with him. On the subject of love, I have a feeling that you are not as you say "madly in love", but you simply have feelings of infatuation for him. Infatuation can often be mistaken for love and is very common among girls of your age group.
I know that you don't want to hear this, but you have to open your eyes. You are only 13, you are still basically a child and he is a full-grown man. If you two were to have a relationship it would not be healthy or normal at all. Please listen to the warnings that we have given you and realize that we are saying these things because we do not want anything bad to happen to you.
To answer your actual question, don't tell him that you love him and don't be surprised if he never says that he does. If he is a decent person he won't tell you that he loves you and if he does tell you that then you need to bolt. I'm not saying that you have to stop being around him all together, but you need to be careful and never, NEVER go anywhere with him alone and without telling someone exactly where you are and have a way to get in touch with someone in case something goes wrong.
I understand what it is like to have feelings for an older man, when I was 13 I thought I was "in love" with a 25 year old, as years have gone by I now realize that it was just infatuation and I am so glad that I never did anything about it. Please take our warnings seriously. I really hope I helped. Good luck.
Love, Rainbow
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Okay, this is kind of gross, but I mean, I really need help, and fast. You see, we've had a long history of breast cancer in my family, and my aunt died of it 2 years ago.
Well, I was taking a shower today, and I got out to dry myself off. I noticed that my chest hurt really bad, and I looked down, and saw this huge lump on the side of my nipple. I felt it and it felt like this huge ball underneath my skin. It hurts realy, really bad. I know that your breasts already hurt if you touch 'em, but this was just like excrusiating pain.
So I have a few questions.
1. Can you get breast cancer at 14 years old? (I just turned 14 on may 30th.)
2. Does anyone else have this?
3. If not, should I get it checked out?
4. If I do need to get it checked out, how should I tell my Mom?
I'm like, really scared. I hope its nothing, but I don't know who to ask. My Mom's not here, and when she does get here, she'll have 3 friends with her. Please help me ASAP! (link)
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You can get cancer at any age, especially if you have a family history of it. You should definately get it checked out. It might be nothing at all. Just a cyst or other lump, but if it is cancer then catching it early could be the difference between life and death. I don't want to scare you and the chance of a 14 year old having breast cancer is very low, but like everyone said, better safe than sorry. When you mom gets home ask to talk with her alone for a moment and then tell her what you found. If her friends are only going to be there for a little while then you can wait until they leave. You should see a doctor as soon as possible. Best of luck and I hope I helped.
Love, Rainbow
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Anyone know any good summer reads. Everything I usually read is depressing. Like someone usually dies. I'd like suggestions of books that are funny and enjoyable to read. Even Harry Potter depresses me although I do love all the books. Maybe even books I can relate to. You know being a teenager and typical teenage problems. I'll rate anyone who gives any names (link)
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The Georgia Nicolson series by Louise Rennison the specific book names are:
- Angus, Thongs and Full-frontal Snogging
- On the bright side I'm now the girlfriend of a sex god
- Knocked out by my nuga-nugas
- Dancing in my nudy-pants
- Away laughing on a fast camel
- Then he ate my boy entrancers
- Startled by his furry shorts
(these are only the names in North America. The U.K. titles are differnt, I think.
Alice, I think - Susan Juby
Miss Smithers - Susan Juby
Alice McLeod, Realist at Last - Susan Juby
The year of Secret Assignments - Jaclyn Moriarty
The Shopaholic series by Sophie Kinsella they are called:
- Confessions of a Shopaholic
- Shopaholic Takes Manhattan
- Shopaholic Ties the Knot
- Shopaholic and Sister
Gossip Girl seems to be very popular.
Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants - Ann Brashares
Feeling Sorry For Celia - Jaclyn Moriarty
Hope I helped. Have fun reading!!
Love, Rainbow
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I'm a beginner I guess.
I'll love any good websites that improve a singing voice, warm ups, breathing tips, throat remedies..
And if you have any tips yourself.. :]
I'll also like to know what songs are easy to start with. Someone suggested songs from Wicked?
Thanks :] (link)
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I don't know if its too late to help, but I just wanted to say that the songs from Wicked tend to go high then low quickly which can be difficult for especially beginner voices. Also they tend to need a very powerful voice. Many showtunes are like this, you may want to work your way up to Wicked songs. Its really gratifying when you master one.
One warm up is to sing "red leather yellow leather red leather yellow leather red leather yellow leather red" really fast. Its difficult at first, but it gets your mouth nice and loose. Another one is "the tip of the tounge, the teeth, the lips" You sing that and keep going higher/lower with it. Make sure you pronounce all the sylables clearly. Singing scales is a good way to warm up.
When you're singing, if you're sitting, sit up straight and at the front of your chair, make sure your feet are flat on the ground. If you're standing (which does tend make your voice sound better) stand straight, feet flat on the ground, shoulders back, head level, feet hip-width apart. Don't slouch. If you are going for a high note, look down. It stretches your vocal chords and makes it easier for you to hit the note.
When you breathe, make sure that your shoulders do not move. Your abdomen should be the only thing expanding.
You have probably heard of "singing through your nose", but how do you know when you're doing it? Well, if you pinch your nose and sing and your nose buzzes, then you are singing through your nose. Try different techniques of breathing until your nose doesn't buzz anymore.
ALWAYS warm up before you sing. Increase your range gradually, don't go for a note that is really far out of your range, it could damage your voice. Hope I helped. Good Luck on your singing.
Love, Rainbow
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ok well i have sweaty hands all the time and i dont no why its really weird but does anyone no why i have sweaty hands and is there anything that can stop it? (link)
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You may have a condition called "hyperhydrosis". This is when certain parts of your body sweat a lot. I would see a doctor who will probably refer you to a dermatoligist. There are many treatment options for hyperhidrosis, see a dermatoligist for information on them. Here are some sires with information on hyperhydrosis:
http://www.parsec.it/summit/hyper1e.htm
http://www.sweathelp.org/English/
http://www.sts.org/doc/4097
http://www.sweatmanagement.ca/
http://www.aocd.org/skin/dermatologic_diseases/hyperhidrosis.html
Try googling "hyperhidrosis" for more. Hope I helped. Good Luck.
Love, Rainbow
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If the guy tries not to cum during sex and is successful, is there still a possibilty of getting pregnant??? (link)
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Yes. There is something that is released during sex called precum. Its very rich in sperm. The release of precum cannot be controlled. Hope I helped.
Love, Rainbow
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My hands sweat constantly, and it's very embarrassing. Are there any ways that I can stop them from sweating so much? Is there a medicine or something? (link)
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You may have a condition called "hyperhidrosis". This is where you sweat excessively. You should go see your doctor or dematoligist about this. There are many treatment plans for hyperhidrosis, some that are more invasive than others. A dermatoligist could really help you with your condition, if thats what you have and if you don't have hyperhydrosis they could help you anyway. Here are some websites with information on hyperhydrosis:
http://www.parsec.it/summit/hyper1e.htm
http://www.sweathelp.org/English/
http://www.sts.org/doc/4097
http://www.sweatmanagement.ca/
You could also google hyperhydrosis for more information. Hope I helped. Good Luck.
Love, Rainbow
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I am 14/f and i'm 5'6" I hate being tall so much. I'm going to grow more and i bet I'll end up like really tall. I don't really knwo for sure, but to me most of the pretty people are short. i am so self concious about it!! I wish i could be 5'4" and stay that way for ever. I think about it every day and it makes me really sad. How can i get over this. i'll rate high (link)
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Honey,
I have a friend who is 5'10 and she is only 15. I am 5"8 and three quaters. 5"6 isn't that tall for a 14 year old girl. Tall people want to be short and short people long to be tall. Being tall (or short for that matter) doesn't have to be a setback for you. It all in how you carry it. If you accept the fact that you are tall and display it with pride and grace then it will work to your advantage. Many girls who are taller slouch and try to make themselves look shorter, this makes them look self-concious. Confidence is attractive, no matter what your height. You can't control or change your height. I have never met a woman who doesn't dislike something about her physical appearence. For you its your height. All you can really do is realize that there is beauty in your height. You can make it work if you are confident. I hope that you feel better about your height and yourself. Don't let what you can't change bring you down. You have beauty within yourself, you just have to find it. Hope I helped.
Love, Rainbow
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I was wondering ...what are the symptoms of ADD? ADHD? Because i'm wondering if I have it. I'm always hyper, It's very difficult to concentrate on some thing and I just don't know.
I'm gonna ask my doctor next check up but that might be a while.
P.S. I'm a 14 year old guy (link)
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It is a good idea to go to your doctor if you're concerned because a simple perscription could really help you. Here are some sites where you will find symptoms of both ADD and ADHD. Good Luck.
http://www.add-adhd-help-center.com/symptoms_add_adhd.htm
http://www.heartspring.net/adhd_symptoms_add_children.html
http://psychcentral.com/disorders/adhd/adhd_symptoms.htm
http://www.vaxa.com/ADHD-symptoms.cfm
http://coolnurse.healthology.com/focus_index.asp?f=adhd_comprehend
Hope I helped.
Love, Rainbow
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On Saturday night my Boyfriend Came over ((were both 16)) and things got pretty hot and heavy(but we DID NOT have sex), and he came but it was through his shorts and boxers but he touched it before he fingered me. Is it possible to get pregnant like that? (link)
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Technecally it is POSSIBLE, but the probibility is very very low. Sperm don't live for very long outside the body, so the chances of you getting pregnant are almost nothing. Even if they were to live, he couldn't have fingered you high enough to get the sperm cole enough to your uterus. Don't worry, there is almost no chance that you could be pregnant. Hope I helped.
Love, Rainbow
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thank you soooooooooo much for the answer.. we already exchanged our numbers and i have really no guts to tell him this in person.. so i will just tell him through text message.. but how would i tell him? what am i going to say without turning into embarassment? i really want to tell him because maybe i'll regret it if i won't.. but i'm also scared to lose his friendship, he's very sweet and nice guy.. sometimes i want to think that he like me too but i just think that he's just really nice that you will misunderstood that he likes you. thank you soo much.... (link)
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I understand that you are scared of loosing his friendship, I went through a very simmilar situation myself. I am not sure if telling him in a text message is the best way. If you are really not able to do it in person, you might consider doing it over the phone. Either way, I don't think you should start a conversation by telling him. I think you should try to work it into the conversation. You might consider leading the conversation in that direction by asking about his love life etc. You could also tell him when there is a break in the conversation. You don't have to tell him in a way that will make it really akward. You can just say something like "Listen, [name], I have had romantic feelings toward you lately and I thought that you deserved to know." or "I like you and I thought it was only fair that you know". Tell him in a calm and put-together manner. Try not to look too nervous. If he doesn't return the feelings then just let him know that its no big deal and you can always get over it. This will make him feel like you can still be friends. If he does return the feelings, then you can decide what you are going to do together.
Although it may seem very scary, you will feel better after you have done it. It doesn't mean that you can't be friends afterwards. I told my guy friend that I had feelings for him and we are still friends, no akwardness or anything. I hope that I helped you. Good Luck and, as always, if you have any other questions just ask.
Love, Rainbow
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Hello... I have a problem, i hope that you can help me.. thanks in advance.. I really like this guy in my class. I only have one subject with him, my teacher lets him to sit beside me so that i can help him once in a while because he's a korean and he doesn't understand everything though he can speak english.. We became close, he's a really nice guy.. I really really like him... My problem is, he has a gf, but i'm not sure if she's here in the philippines or if she's in korea.. I don't want to ask because we don't talk about our love life and he doesn't talk about his gf either.. What would I do? I heard that koreans are not allowed to have a gf/bf of different race or nationality, and im filipina, is it true? I'm not sure if it's true.. And is it also a nice idea to tell him what i really feel about him? Please help... 6 days to go and we won't see each other anymore because it's nearly vacation and we have different course... I will surely miss him..
Thank you so much....
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This is a tricky one. First of all, I know many Koreans that have girlfriends of different nationalities. However, some more traditional families or people frown upon other nationalities dating their own. There is no real way to tell whether or not this is how he thinks besides asking him. Most Koreans are fine with dating other nationalities.
Since you won't be seeing him after the next six days, I don't really see much of a problem in telling him your feelings. If he doesn't feel the same way, then you won't have to see him again, if he does then you can proceed from there. On the other hand, telling him may cause him a lot of stress. Especially if he returns the feelings, he may not know how to handle this and stay faithful to his girlfriend. If you feel that it is okay to tell him, that it won't cause him too much stress, then by all means go ahead. If you don't feel that now is an appropriate time to tell him, then ask to exchange emails, phone numbers and im information. You can communicate over the vacation and maybe get to know him better. Just because you are taking different courses doesn't mean that you have to lose touch.
I understand your sense of urgency, however, you should understand that there is time if you need it. I think that if you really believe that you won't see each other after school ends then you should tell him, otherwise you will be left wondering "what if?" and that is worse than being embarrassed or rejected. In the end, it is what we fail to do, rather than what we go through with that we most regret in life. Hope I helped. If you have any other questions, just ask. Good Luck.
Love, Rainbow
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I'm 13/F and I got my period and everything and a lot of times I think about sex. I feel so yucky and dirty when I do and I feel like I shouldn't even think about it this early. Like I actually want sex right now. I am planning to be a virgin until I'm married but is this normal for me to be wanting sex already? (link)
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Yes, it is very normal. You have just hit puberty which means that you have a whole bunch of hormones raging through you. You've never had these hormones before and so it may seem strange and dirty. Everyone has thoughts like this around your age. It is not under your control and it is perfectly healthy and normal. I think it is very admirable that you wish to remain a virgin until marriage. You can't change your hormones or your sexuality. Don't feel bad about feeling sexual. Its not a bad thing, it is very normal. Hope I set your mind at ease. If you have any other questions, then just drop them in my inbox. i'll be glad to help.
Love, Rainbow
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Hi, Where did you get your advicenators layout thingy at? Like how'd you make it pretty? Sorry this is so retarded... (link)
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Well, first of all, its not a "retarded" question, its a very good question. I was confused myself at first.
I use a pre-made background from advicenators. Heres how to get one:
Go to: http://advicenators.com/backgrounds.php and pick out a background design that you like. There are pages and pages of them to choose from.
Then, copy & paste the "/img/bg/somethingsomething.jpg" part of the text in the box.
Go to "column settings" on the sidebar and paste the text into "page background image" space.
Hit "submit colours" and it should be changed.
You can also use different styles of columns. Different ways of setting up the information. There are four premade styles: Default, Your Space, Particka and Plain Wide Boxes. I use plain wide boxes. They are all under "column settings"
Besides using a background you can also change and costomize the colours. This is done in "column settings". There are pre-set colour schemes or you can use the colour codes to make your own scheme. You can find codes for all the colours at: http://www.nuthinbutnet.net/resources/colors.aspx
I think I have covered everything, if there is still something that you are wondering about or something does not work properly, then drop me something in my inbox and I'll do my best to help you.
Love, Rainbow
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I'm 13 and i got my period about a year and a half ago and i've always used pads. i just recently tried tampons because i have dance preformances and cant wear pads because they will slide off my costumes. so for my first time, i tried my moms "playtex gentle glide" tampons and they're " super absorbancy tampons" is it okay that i used these? or do u have any beter recomendations?? thanks. i rate 5's (link)
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It is reccomended that you use the lowest absorbency for your flow. I use regular. However, if you tend to have a heavy flow, then super absorbancy is probably fine. You might consider using a lower absorbancy when you are on a lighter flow. If they feel okay when they're in then you can certainly continue to use them. Just remember to change them about every 4-8 hours (or whatever the reccomended time is for your brand) and you should be fine. As for other reccomendations, I use tampax compak or Tampax Pearl Plastic. I like them and they work well for me, but thats me. Hope I helped.
Love, Rainbow
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This question may be stupid, but I'm honestly wondering - why like everyone but ME is getting a boyfriend.
I'm a girl, and i'm 15.
I just dont get why all my friend have boyfriends, and I dont? Is there something wrong wiht me? I've been told numerous times, that my time will come, but geez, i dont want to be like really old!! I want one soon, not because I just want a boyfriend to say "oh i havea bf" but because I really want to love someone & be loved in return, as corny as that sounds.
Ahhh is this normal though? To feel like this, is there anything I can do to get a boyfriend, like anything boys like in particular..? (link)
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I know exactly how you feel, but I really wouldn't worry about it. Basically all my friends have boyfriends and yes it can be upsetting and leave you asking why you don't have one. Its not you. There are lots of people who don't hve their first boyfriend or girlfriend until they are in college. I'm sure that won't be you, though. Don't try to impress boys, be real and confident and that will attract people. People are attracted to confidence. Don't think that you are the one with the fault, you're not. Contrary to popular belief, its very normal not to have a boyfriend at 15. Don't worry about it, just relax. You're very young and there's plenty of time for boyfriends. Hope I helped.
Love, Rainbow
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my nipples have been hurting a lot lately. they sting really bad, even when im just like watching tv. im 14 female and havent gotten my period yet. is it a sign im getting my period soon? (link)
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This is probably a sign that your breasts are growing. This is a sign that you have hit puberty, along with that comes your period. There is no way to really tell when you will have your period. Discharge from your vagina is another way to tell if you are going to get your period soon. The fact that your breasts hurt mean that they're growing. They may also tingle or itch. Hope I helped.
Love, Rainbow
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if you have sex, can a doctor tell becauee your vagina is stretched? (link)
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He will not be able to tell if your vagina is streched, also your hymen may have broken during sex, but there is no way for a doctor to know from that either. Hymens can break from many other things besides sex. Hope I helped.
Love, Rainbow
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hi im 13/f. i was wondering if anyone knew a good deodorant or antiperspirent. i sweat under my arms all the time even when its cold and its embarrasing in school can someone give me tips on what to do about it? ill rate high thanks in advance (link)
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Hey, Secret Platinum works well. If you sweat all the time, then you might have a condition called hyperhidrosis. Thats when your sweat glands are overproducing. There are very effective treatments that you can get from your doctor or a dermatologist. If the condition persists I would go to a doctor. They will be able to treat it with relative ease. The following are some sites that you can visit with information about hyperhidrosis.
http://www.parsec.it/summit/hyper1e.htm
http://www.sweatmanagement.ca/
http://www.sweathelp.org/English/
Plus, you can always google it. You might consider using a sport or mens antiperspirant. They tend to be stronger. Hope I helped. Good Luck.
Love, Rainbow
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