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Hi my names Miren, I'll give you stacks of advice on anything =] I've got an Art&Design diploma and I'm studying a Film Production degree in Staffordshire. I'm also a black belt in Taekwon-Do. I'll try my best to help anybody needing... help.
Gender: Male
Location: England
Occupation: Student
Age: 18
Member Since: July 8, 2006
Answers: 67
Last Update: July 14, 2008
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Is this something wrong with me?

It's not a constant thing, but I have some real problems with anger at times. For example before.. Mom and I were in the car and I was crying.. been bogged down by stress, friends issues, and a recent breakup. Then I totally lost it because I felt she wasn't listening to me. I started throwing everything everywhere and kicking and screaming, telling her to listen to me. she tried to act all "calm" about it and even tried to change the topic and ignore what I was saying. I got mad and told her to stop being calm and lose the tone. I got even madder, and then something snapped. I put my fingers in the car window, and pushed the button up until my fingers got caught and kept doing it till I screamed in pain. I also bit hard into my hand in anger and the marks are still there.

I have never done anything like that before. Mom and I haven't spoken since. I feel terrible about what I did. I have no idea what got into me. Is there something wrong with me, or was this just a one-off thing, like losing control for a moment? I feel really ashamed because my mom is good to me, and I went and did something like that. What should I do? Is this a serious problem that requires serious help?

thanks (link)
Sometimes people go through a serious stage like this, it's simply a build up of stress created by social, work, lack of sleep, headaches etc etc problems. As you said, you had some social problems.

People let it out in very different ways, you might attack someone, break things, or harm yourself - like you did. Clearly you didn't want to attack your mother because she - as you stated is nice to you; so you attacked yourself probably in connection to the kind of problem you had - something making yourself feel bad?

This isn't too massively serious, it depends, if your a teenager which I guess you are, then most of the commotion could have built up from hormones hence the actions.

This is what you can do about this though to stop yourself doing it again: work on your control, anger and emotions. Control would largely be covered by atending a martial art or something else which takes a lot of inner control. No one deserves to put up with bottling anger all the time, let it out, but not on yourself again, a martial art again would help with this as well, during a sparring (fighting) session, otherwise you can get a punch/kick bag to use at home, and you can even start weight training, most sporting activities will allow u to channel your anger out, as long as it takes effort, sweat and blood (not so much on the blood bit). The only thing you can do about the emotions is perhaps meditation/ active meditation, just start giving yourself lumps of time daily to think about yourself - calming yourself.

Just follow that, and you will be fine, and even enjoy it.


I'm an 18 year old female, living on the East Coast. My friend Jake is 22, living in Oregon. He is suicidal. Is there anything I can do to help?

I've known him for about 4 years. He has been suicidal since he was 10, apparently - that's 12 whole years of "depression". He just came back from the Jop Corps last week for his summer vacation, so yesterday was my first time speaking to him in 10 months. ALLL he would talk about is getting his hands on some tough drugs and then going to the "train tracks", if you know what I mean.

How do I help him? His complaints are pretty much the usual stuff. His family hates him, no one loves him, he doesn't have a girlfriend and now that he is 22 he will never have kids. For years, I've been trying to help him, trying to comfort him, trying to make points where I feel I can. But oh no, nothing works, because.... "no one loves me". When he says that, it actually insults me. What, have four years of my time meant nothing to him? Isn't there only so much a person can do?

I almost blame myself for not being able to help him. I can not contact his friends or family, because I have zero connection to them. He doesn't live with his parents, so there's no address I can find. He only has a cell phone, so that says that. And I don't even know his parents names, or friends, for that matter. I have zero way to get him help.

I know this isn't about me, but I'm losing my patience here. He is seriously stressing me out. I try and try and try, but I am never good enough. What, does he like being this way, or something? Could he secretly enjoy his lifestyle? Could I have a major attention whore on my hands, rather than a suicidal man?

He is also compulsive liar, which doesn't help anything. I'm thinking his other friends (the ones he doesn't have, according to him), probably assume that if he hasn't done away with himself in 12 years, he will never have the guts. That may be true, but I am not willing to write something like a death threat off, I'm sorry... because I know there is always a breaking point.

I consulted a few of my friends, and of course I heard the same thing every time, "Why do you bother talking to him? Oh, I wouldn't talk to him. Screw that guy."

Only, I know that wouldn't contribute anything to his well-being. Right?

I guess what I'm trying to ask is, at what point should I disconcern myself, if ever? And what more can I do to help him? Trying to help somebody who doesn't want to help themselves, is usually a failure before the process even commences... (link)
Well if he hasn't tried suicide yet, then obviously you have been doing a good job, =]

You should try get your friend to seek professional help, if he doesn't want to, then keep telling him, otherwise just keep making sure that he knows that you care. Your friend could just be an attention seeker, he might like you a lot because you make him feel good so he just grabs attention from you, try making the convosation instead of him, he will just follow your lead and hopefully you can have a nice chat with him if it isn't the case howerver... One night you should break it to him though, tell him its obvious he has a problem and that he should realise it himself and tell him to seek help through sites like this, or a therapist etc. - good luck, you won't need it though =]


if i slept with a bra on would that make my boobs stop growing?! and if it doesnt would that at least make my boobs rounder (link)
No... and no it won't.


i was raped when i was younger and i don't know what to do anymore it haunts me in my sleep. I think about it all the time and when i see any of the guys that did that to me i freak out i start crying and they were all over five years ago so i can't go to the police and tell them i was raped i don't know any of the guys names. All i know is that they used to date my mom and when i told my mom that they were doing that to me she didn't believe me. I am now in foster care and i don't ever see my mom. But that fact that i was raped is scary and i need all the help and advice that i can get. so please anyone help me. (link)
It isn't too late. You can always tell the police this, they would be able to contact your mother somehow. Talk to a therapist aswell, they would help you in releasing that inner fear and tragedy. Talk to a trusted friend as well, or maybe a close family member, it is good to have some one else other then a therapist to be able to talk too and keep you on your feet.


Okay soo I'm a 15 year old female. I've been going out with my boyfriend for just over a month now. I love spending time with him! but i see him more as a friend than anything else. When we kiss there just arent any sparks. I'm afraid of hurting him, but i think if i stay with him ill just hurt him more later on... any ideas? (link)
Try spice it up a bit, maybe move to a better surrounding for a better mood to kiss him, maybe something will spark then. Or let him be the one to kiss you, maybe the spark will come when he is in the right mood - he might kiss better. Other then that, there isn't much you can do if the relationship isn't lifting you in anyway. If you want to be friends with him, then go out and have a good time with him, then try breaking the news to him, give him a bit of time, and then start going out with him again, as a friend.


I've only kissed one guy b4, IT WAS A TOTAL DISASTER! SO, Im really nervous about kissing my b/f. I want to kiss him but I don't know how to make-out. I'll mess up for sure.
Any help is appreciated!
Websites
Personal experiences
Etc.
THANX IN ADVANCE!
~Kayla~ (link)
Best thing to do is, don't think about your last kiss, forget about it all together. Kissing your new bf will come naturally when you fall into him and when that kiss comes, just let him lead it on. Watch some romantic films in your spare time.


I am getting an MRI scan soon for my head (jaw). Would I have to take out a belly button barbel? It's some type of surgical metal I don't quite remember what type. Is there anyway I can keep it in? I have had the piercing for a couple of months but I still have a month to go before I can take it out or change it and I really don't want to mess with it.

Thanks!! (link)
If the scan is for your jaw then I don't think your piercing would harm the scan or yourself at all. So don't worry about it. Makesure you consult your doctor about it though or any specialist before u take the scan.




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