I have SO been in your situation (minus the anger/crazy although I felt crazy at the time). Don't think for a minute that the Creator doesn't have a sense of humor (or a tricky side, I tell ya). I wanted a baby SO bad! When I was with my now ex-bf we tried and tried actively for over 5 years to get pregnant and stay that way - couldn't get pregnant and the times I did I always miscarried in the first trimester!...and then when we broke up, I turned to a guy that I dated before for comfort, he was much like my "rock" when I fell: and a true best friend.

Guess what? I got pregnant THAT month and carried to full term! Strangely enough, I have always stayed with one guy and one guy only. ONLY that one particular month in my ENTIRE life, I had slept with both guys within a week of each other- I hadn't even been with more than one guy within months of each other! (something I would have NEVER done before! The guilt ran deep I tell ya..) I actually fell into the category of not knowing exactly whose baby it was..I was completely devastated and felt really trashy because I wasn't raised that way! Even though I'm not religious, I still felt guilt and shame.

You know: Life does throw ya some curve balls!..and the creator "works in mysterious ways".

Anyway, my ex and I naturally ended up back together, and according to the OB my pregnancy date was the day that belonged to my ex...I found out later (as she grew to look so much like my best friend), that he was mistaken. But my ex was there for her birth and I gave her his last name honestly thinking she belonged to him!

What a conundrum!! "Careful what you ask for because you just might get it!": one of my other favorite mottos. I wanted and asked for a baby fervently.. and this is how the Creator gave it to me!

I believe that you will love this baby no matter what! AND maybe if your ex loves you enough he will come help you raise this child!

Oddly enough, in my situation, we three sat down and decided that my ex would be the father and my best friend would take the role of "uncle" that way he could actively be in her life..

As I always say- communication and truth go a long way. If your ex isn't willing to come back and be with you during this difficult time, then he probably wasn't worth your love anyway! And think about what kind of father that would make him?!

I'm sorry that this happened to you, much like it happened to me- but your old enough now that you really can "reach down into that well of strength" and draw on it when you need it most.

Have you always had depression? Or are you mainly depressed because of the way things are going in your life right now? If it's number two, I want you to know that whether your baby has a father right now, won't make a difference at all about how very much you love him/her!

I can't cure your depression, but you said you wanted a baby. Now: concentrate on that beautiful being growing inside you- it's really a feeling like NO other in this universe. And yes, you should seek out some counseling if you find yourself crying everyday. It's not healthy for you or the wonderful being growing inside you!

If your ex won't come back, and you really, really feel that you cannot do this alone (although I truly think that you can). Now is the time to weigh your options: keep the baby, adopt the baby out or..abort it. Please before you do anything drastic, talk to your ex, he may be very willing to take the responsibility of being a father, whether it is his or not!

As hard as it may be, you should turn to your family for help- they will likely be upset at first- but once they see that beautiful being- they will love it ALMOST as much as you will- and believe me THIS is a love that you just cannot "find"..a love like no other.

I know from experience that the wonders of motherhood (whether it is biological or "step") never ever cease!

AND now I know why things turned out the way they did for me...my daughter's biological father passed on before she even got a chance to know what a wonderful person he was...and my ex..well he didn't make such a good husband and father anyway- not much at all! But, now I have this wonderful little curly headed, beautiful, smart piece of ME that I can shower ALL my love on and that loves me unconditionally and with no strings attached!

So, now I'm a "single" mom, with a daughter that IS MY HEART. I don't have any regrets, although I was confused as heck back then. And, I've been dating a great guy for over a year, that my seven year old daughter adores more than her supposed "dad on the birth certificate"..

Just remember, "what doesn't break you makes you stronger"; and "for everything there is a reason"..you just don't know what that reason is quite yet and that is the most difficult hurdle to overcome.

You'll be in my thoughts and I'm sending many Blessings!
Jasmine Moon

Disconnected is SO on the money on this one...most relationships begin in the "infatuation" stage, and once this stage is over..this is the prime time to find out whether it's really going to last.

A good relationship needs to be treated like a garden..you have to put a lot of effort into it EVERY DAY to make it work (pruning out the bad, re-planting the good, and daily watering with love). Some people never realize this, it's fortunate that you have! This way you can ensure the longevity (if it's meant to be) in a mature and rational manner. IE. Don't play head games! And it looks like you aren't! *gives kudos*

As a woman, I can give you a little advice-- most women by nature crave romance. Maybe it's time to plan a little romantic surprise for her, so you can find that "exciting" feeling just for a little while again? Maybe go somewhere new to you both so that you have something more to share and a memory to keep.

Like Disconnected implied, this is the way of relationships..the media, most times, gives us this impression that it is always exciting and romantic..but in reality a good (and actually more rewarding) relationship takes work, and lots of love, to become ever-lasting.

Good luck to you both!,
Jasmine

Weeeheell, uhum..there are only so many things I can think of that one would snort..but we won't go there since that really wasn't your question.(I'm truly tempted to inform you about the other much more horrible, and 90% inevitable things that resorting to this practice will lead to, but this is obviously not the time right now).

I'll just address it this way, anytime you snort anything it causes damage to your nasal passages. Because you had surgery, it is likely that your membranes are much more sensitive and even thinner.

I used to know a guy, without Rhino, that indulged in this type of thing..it ruined his nose! He could literally take a tissue: run it up one side of his nose, and out the other! *gross*

I would highly recommend that you DO NOT do this. When you have this surgery done they take from places in your nose to shape other places, and I'm quite sure that your membranes are likely very much thinner!

You've spent a great amount of money to have your nose shaped into a way that you find attractive: Don't ruin it, or you will never forgive yourself! Secondary surgeries only make things worse (Michael Jackson is a prime example!)

Jasmine

"Talking to him never solves anything?"..are you talking about the right things? Are you asking the right questions?

If my boyfriend/fiancee/husband/sig other, hung out with his ex all day long and didn't own up right away..well, as some of you've seen me say "BIG RED FLAG".

Why did he hide it? Either
A. He's guilty,
B. He fears what will happen if you found out that they did something he would consider harmless- and you would consider a tragedy.
Or C. BOTH with B being worse than what I suggested.

Males, especially at that age, are, unfortunately weak when it comes to being able to fight off a seduction. More unfortunate is that some of them grow out of it, some of them don't.

Can you trust her? As you say yourself she'd do ANYTHING.

The bigger question, and this is the one I really cannot answer because I don't know your boyfriend, is CAN YOU trust him?

YES, you have a right to be upset. NOT only because he hung out with his ex; but MORE IMPORTANTLY because he didn't keep the communication lines open with you, and let you know right away what he (planned on doing) or was doing. Those little gadgets we call phones are everywhere nowadays, no excuses there...all he had to do was pick it up and give you a call.

Whether he did anything or not is really secondary to the fact that he, as your committed boyfriend, kept this information from you. That is what you need to concentrate on..the rest: time and instinct will tell; it always does one way or the other.

The problem here is really about how much you trust each other...how open are you with each other? Can he tell you most of his deep dark secrets without you freaking out? and visa-versa?

If your going to go on in a loving relationship then you both have to be responsible enough to know when your hurting each other and put it to a halt. AND if, by chance or accident, one of you hurts the other, that person should be ABLE to come forward right away with their information without being scared of the consequences, you should be able to sit and TALK (note I didn't say argue) it out, and decide whether forgiveness is in order- or what punishment should fit the crime (yes, believe it or not, you can both agree that he gets "punished" for his actions).

Calmness goes SUCH a long way. Keeping a calm demeanor (even if your insides are a complete wreck) will, also, often confuse those that you are angry at and they will often become more open with the truth!

Let me share just ONE story about how to keep a calm demeanor. When I was about 22, my boyfriend, we'll call him J, at the time, and I were sitting on the couch (in a place we rented with other couples and partied a lot in btw). We were feeding each other strawberries (very romantic you all should try it sometime!)..anyway, a couple of the "party" girls showed up, one being an old fling of his. We'll call party girl AMY and, old fling girl DENISE. Okay, so Denise comes in and says, "J, I need to talk to in private on the porch." and proceeded to go outside. Amy then said,"Are you going to let her talk to your boyfriend that way?" She was obvioulsy baiting me, as Amy and Denise were close friends. Now I could have stood up and ran to the porch to tell her off..or glared at him and said some ugly words or both..but instead:

I looked Amy straight in the eyes and said, "why not?", "J is his own person he knows the consequences if he follows her out onto the porch."

J, without skipping a beat, piped up in front of them both (and this was VERY important) to say, "uh uh, I'm staying RIGHT here."

You need to make sure that you and your boyfriend know where the lines are drawn in your relationship: You need to really clarify- what is acceptable and what is not! And it cannot be onesided.

In the meantime, if you decide to keep him, try to stay calm and unruffled (she obviously is trying to pull your strings, and I hope he didn't fall for it). Chances are, if she did get away with something, the info will get back to you really soon. Sounds like she would be one that would brag to the first person she could come across, just so that she COULD break you both apart.

I don't want to TELL you what or what not to do regarding keeping this relationship; but he needs to know that if you are going to stick around and NOT HURT HIM that way, then he needs to tell you as these things are happening!! He HAS to be open with you

I actually had a guy have an affair on me in my youth because he was afraid to tell me that he made the mistake of cheating once, therefore, she actually used that one time to actually "threaten" him into bed with her several times over..his fear of telling me about it was her weapon. If he didn't stay having the affair with her: she was going to tell me!

See how important trust and communication can be? That's why you should not only be dating, but be best friends..

Ask him how he would feel if you hung out with your ex all day? If he says it would be okay..go ahead call his bluff, do as he did (but don't cheat on him)- but DO tell him when and where you plan on meeting your ex. If he really cares, he'll come running to stop you with promises galore (I just hope he keeps them in the long run). It wouldn't be a bad idea either, if his ex witnessed this.

Most importantly, he really needs to tell her, IN FRONT OF YOU, that friendship is all that he can give her. *try not to smirk at her if he agrees to this-remember: calm and cool.* Instead, kiss his face off for doing the right thing- right afterwards, and in her presence and re-instate your deep feelings towards him..a dramatic exit sometimes works well after this also..*lol-ahh memories*.

And if all heck breaks loose and you find out the worst happened, remember that it was HIM that made the commitment to you: NOT HER. AND it is him that you should blame..so, keeping with your calm demeanor, don't go scratching her eyes out with a point that will end up pointless. If it comes to this, you will need to sit and talk (whether he likes it or not) and decide whether you forgive him and, maybe, what his punishment should be!

If, the worst has happened and he refuses to talk to you about healing the wounds, then it might just be high time to "give him the boot". *just don't kick him too hard j/k-smile*

Hope this helps,
Jasmine

Oh sweetheart! Bless your darling heart...

Well, I WILL say this, the devil isn't after you...if such a being exists I'm sure he'd have a long list of people to chase that came in line WAY before you ever would! So just get that out of your mind right now! The creator loves everyone..including you and he (she) isn't going to let some evil being try and take over your life.

You say that you exude confidence, but don't feel it? Yet..you know that you are popular..?

Do you ever have feelings of total control? or like your equal to God (creator)? Have days where you just KNOW that you are better than everyone else? During this time, do you have trouble sleeping?

Back to knowing that you are popular...if you are popular why do you think that you stink all the time?
And that you are ugly and hairy?
When you feel this way, do you just want to sleep and sleep all the time? Do you cry uncontrollably? And feel completely useless and uncared for?

I don't want to be the one to tell you what you seem to already suspect...

http://www.focusas.com/BipolarDisorder.html

Bi-polar/Manic Depression and OCD can be passed on genetically. And guess when they usually roar their ugly little heads first?

Yep, when you are right smack dab in the middle of teenage hell!

Stupidity may or may not run in your family..but I can tell you this: YOU ARE NOT STUPID, your reaching out, and that is a highly intelligent thing to do!

I took Psychology in college, but I didn't get far enough that I could help you with what I perceive could be a psychological problem. I did though spend twelve years with my severely bipolar, slightly schizophrenic, topped off with a severe case of PTSD...husband-person.

You could just be having a bad case of PMS..but I don't think you should take any chances based on your families mental history. From what I've read, you really should talk to a professional, just in case.

I don't know where you are but..here is a start:

Bipolar Hotline: 1-800-826-3632.

If you talk to a psychiatrist anonymously, and I'm wrong, you've lost nothing. But if I'm correct, and do nothing..you may only plunge deeper in despair, and I wouldn't want that for someone who has SO much potential!

Please call..no harm, no foul.

Great Big Hugs and Blessings and I'm here- drop me a line if ya need me!,
Jasmine

Odd...you said they seem to like you at first but end up dating your friends?

I could be wrong..but know that..popularity comes with a price. I do hope that your friends aren't being ugly about you behind your back. And the scarier thought, maybe your friends are "giving up" more than you do. If so, GOOD FOR YOU! If I'm wrong, I'm terribly sorry to make accusations about your friends.

Milo..sounds like a nice guy so far...the fact that he added you to facebook opened a wide door. Send him some messages! Get to know him better..chat with him online..who knows what may happen??

And when you see him,wave at him!, be open about yourself, find things that you have in common and talk about them (maybe shyness?), smile at him a lot, let your soft voice, eyes, and body language tell him that you find him attractive without saying anything outright. You don't have to jump in his lap or anything *lol*..you could just stand a bit closer to him for instance. There is no rule that you have to look away when he looks at you..*grin*

I have a feeling he'll come around soon *big smile*. The fact that he is shy is what is probably making it more difficult in letting you know that he likes you too! I bet that once he realizes that you are a nice "non-threatening" person he'll become less shy around you. Who knows? Maybe he doesn't go on the "dating merry go round" either! I mean..he IS shy, right?

You have mutual friends, eh? How bout' a mutual hangout time and place? Talk to one of your mutual friends and mention casually that you think that he is cute! ..like "You know Milo right? Well, he added me to his facebook..ya know, he's kinda cute." It WILL get back to him and give him the confidence he needs to step up.

*twinkling eyes*
Keep me posted!
Jasmine Moon

I need a little clarification. How did he break your best friend's heart? Did he date both of you? Maybe I'm misunderstanding. More info please, I'd like to help.

Jasmine

Sounds like the vanity monster has taken a bite out of him. I may be wrong..but he is likely reveling in all this new attention that he is getting from other girls. Add your attention to it to boot!, and he's on cloud nine when it comes to his current ego level.

Maybe it's time to stand back a bit..and allow him to see that "the grass isn't always greener on the other side". If you really care about him, then don't hold on too tight, he may just cut and run.

Hold your head up high, but let him know how you feel- for instance, that if you have a commitment (ie. he's YOUR boyfriend) you won't tolerate cheating: when I say cheating, that truly includes the fact that he should have more intimacy-and I AM NOT referring to sex, see my page for the definition of intimacy-..he should have more intimacy with you than with the other girls. Hopefully, once the "shine" wears off he'll realize that he's messed up by letting you down.

It's a corny saying..but, oh so true: "If you love something, set it free, if it comes back to you: it's yours. If it doesn't: it never was."

And don't forget.."what's good for the goose, is good for the gander."

Don't play games, but don't sit on your hands either. "Live, love, laugh, and be Happy"!

Hugs,
Jasmine

It's a little vague because I don't know yall's background. (I think that is why no one else has answered this question).

For instance, I won't understand the "forcing into a relationship" part unless I know more...

But it sounds like she is being very clear otherwise.

She feels that your friendship will diminish if you date someone. AND it sounds like she is a bit depressed (and feeling left out) right now because she thinks that she, like others around her, should be experiencing a whirlwind romance and she isn't.

If she is a good friend, you should be there for her right now and let her know that she is worthy of love, and when it's time: a romantic relationship will come along for her, too. Share your experiences with her, but tread softly so that you don't come off like your bragging..and that is the most difficult thing to do. You want to tell her all about it..but the more you are excited, the more she will become despondent.

Actually, this is not unusual at all between best friends, especially when one begins to experience new "relationships" (or even life experiences) before the other does.

Try to put yourself in her shoes, what would you want from your friend if you were on the other side?

Maybe you should plan some time for you two to hang out together and have some "girl time" WITHOUT (and I do mean without) any guys tagging along? Plan a "girls day out" each week.

Shopping anyone?! *laugh*

Remember, that guys (until you marry) will come and go, but friends, true ones, are forever,
Jasmine

As far as I know: Nope. Oddly enough, I can relate more than you would ever expect. I lost a extremely close and very young family member some months ago (I am still grieving), and now his account is set to private. I'm still on his friends list, but, for some reason (maybe myspace policy) it will not allow me access to his page.

His mother, on the other hand, has his password that he used and can access it easily. You might want to call a family member of your friend (I'm terribly sorry, btw)..and see if they will allow you to access it somehow.

In the meantime, you can always put something honoring your friend on your OWN myspace page..and that might be better since most ppl probably cannot see her page anyway.

You may visit mine if you like, which b/c of his pictures there, I don't visit very often anymore *sigh*, death is the worst of losses and pain, and I've had more than my '(un)fair' share of grief:

http://www.myspace.com/Jasmine_Moon

.. and you can even link it to her account so that other's know who your referring to.

Many Blessings to you, and with much sorrow and great empathy for your loss,
Jasmine Moon

It seems no one wants to answer this one..it's a tuffy *wink*; but I don't want to leave you "swinging in the wind"..so here goes...

I cannot say for sure that you cannot be pregnant (as, fortunately, I wasn't there to witness what exactly went on *warm smile*). BUT, if I understand you correctly, then your chances are pretty slim. I cannot remember exactly from my human sexuality course that I took in college too long ago..but it seems that sperm cannot live for very long without some form of substance. ie. when it dries it usually goes "bye bye".

Let's see..what causes late periods other than the obvious:

stress (which you obviously are having), illness (this can range from the common cold to having a vitamin deficiency), being underweight, a new and vigorous exercise routine..it seems there are a few more but it's late and I cannot recall them all.

My best bet would be that your are likely late for another reason..but it's like 80/20 that your NOT pregnant (ie in your favor), because, as I said, I don't know exactly what happened and in what order, etc. It could very well be that he had direct vaginal to penis contact with you before he put the condom on..and, if that happened you CAN get pregnant that way. Or maybe he fingered you right after touching himself.. Remember, It only takes ONE itsy bitsy little spermy! Did he go from using his hand on/near his penis, then straight to you? If so, you've increased your chances of being pregnant.

While I'm on the subject, I think I should inform others reading this: Make no mistake,

YES! YOU CAN GET PREGNANT WHILE YOUR ON YOUR PERIOD!

Okay, If your menstrual cycle doesn't show up in a few days..I would take a pregnancy test just to be sure. Peace of mind is something ya just cannot put a price on *smile*.

Hope I've helped, I did my best!

Blessings!
Jasmine

Before I answer your question..I want to address the legality issue about underage sex. Keep in mind that the laws are different depending on which state you live in, and which country you live in.

For instance, I live in Texas. Unless they changed the law while I wasn't looking- and I am researching this right now- it is not illegal to have consensual sex as a minor as long as you are both still minors. If one of you is not a minor..say the guy is 17 (legal adult in Texas) he can be prosecuted for statutory rape if, and only if, he is three years older than the girl. If this happens it goes on his permanent record as rape and he must report to the local law authorities and be listed on the Texas state website as a sex offender. (keep in mind that assuming that it is reported).

As I said, I'm still researching..attempting to find a federal law that would override a state law.

If you don't mind answering, and you certainly DO NOT have to...what state/country do you reside in?

After I clear this up, I will address your original question.

Lily Pad, would it be rude to ask where you found your legal information?

Working on it sweetie! Keep in mind there isn't any rush!..*smile*
Jasmine..
==============================

Okay, still researching a bit, but realized something when I stepped away..most counties have some sort of county OB/GYN clinic that is free. The best way that you might find out is to call and ask if they would make you an appointment for a fourteen year old. If it is legal in your area, they would tell you so, and include any stigmas attached to it. For instance, "only if you have a parents permission, etc." You could remain completely anonymous and just tell them your birthdate or year of birth!

IF it is a possibility, make that appt! They are likely much closer to you than planned parenthood is. I have always been of a mind, that if someone decides to have intercourse with someone they care about, it's going to happen whether the state, parents, etc approve of it or not; and I would much rather you take precautions than end up pregnant!!!

Honestly, I am much like my mother was. When she saw that I was gaining interest in my sexuality she came to me and told me (I loved her so!) that if and when I decide to have sex, (but she hoped I would wait until I was married)..that she would take me and put me on the pill herself. AND because we had such an honest and great relationship..when I told her I was ready she kept true to her word without any lectures. (of course, when dad found out he flipped..said she was giving me permission to have sex *laugh*..like it would have made a difference *heh*)

Because most of my friends weren't so fortunate as to have an understanding and loving parent: I watched many of my friends become pregnant and most of them dropped out of school! I am SO grateful that my mother did that for me! I did NOT get pregnant and I finished High School graduating in the top 1/3 or my class- with honors! In fact, I didn't have my first child until I was 29, and by that time I was well and ready to take on the responsibilities of motherhood without any fear whatsoever.

My main concern is that you DO NOT become pregnant, and I could preach abstinence all day long (and blow some hot air, try and place my moral values on you etc-it's just not my style!) Because it's your decision and you will do what you decide to do no matter what I (or any legal institution) has to say. That is a fact proven time after time throughout the ages.

I like that this guy insists on using a condom, good for him! And I hope that you can get that appt! At the very least call the 1-800 # of planned parenthood for resources and information..the counselors there are extremely kind and helpful!

Be sure that this is what you want...not b/c someone justs wants you to do it. I can assure you that for most of us, the first time is not anything like we "romanticize" about..for must of us it is painful, messy and a bit clumsy. You won't ever forget it, but I doubt you will experience any fireworks...that takes time and, unfortunately, maturity...*yawns at self*...

Good luck on whatever you decide and be careful!
Jasmine

You could try putting a "relaxer" on it and combing it straight (be sure to follow instructions exactly). Then it would, like a perm, stay straight until it grows back in. I've done this before when I got a perm that I didn't like!

Just be sure, just like perms, that your hair is in good condition and to use at least a 3 minute professional conditioner afterwards!

And always condition after shampooing! If ever your hair becomes dry, etc, I recommend the PROFESSIONAL Infusium leave in treatment for daily use! Not the one you buy in the local drugstore..I prefer to purchase the professional product at my local beauty supply. I've been using Infusium way before they put it in the drugstores, and I KNOW that there is a clear difference between the professional vs. the one you can just purchase anywhere.

Keep in touch!
Jasmine

Well...let's see..

Okay you asked for it.. *smile*..I'm probably overdoing it, but *shrug* maybe you'll find a few you like really well.

"Linger" by the Cranberries (very fitting)

"Cold as Ice" by Foreigner (fits what your looking for)

"Piece of My Heart" by Janis Joplin (one of favs-even if I have a lot of em *lol*- can't help it..love my Janis)

"Go Your Own Way" by Fleetwood Mac

"You Outta Know" by Alanis Morrisette (good one for what your looking for!)

"Found Out About You" by Gin Blossoms (fitting)

You may not like country..but ya gotta admit, they have some really good, "I'm ticked off at you, you snake in the grass" songs, lol:

"Blame it on Your Lying Cheatin Heart" (def. what your looking for)

"Don't it make my Brown Eyes Blue" by Crystal Gayle

"Down to My Last Teardrop" (very empowering) by Tanya Tucker

"Don't Tell Me What to Do" by Pam Tillis

"I've Come to Expect it from You" (also what your lookin' for) by George Strait

"Except for Monday" by Lorrie Morgan

"Fool Hearted Man" (also per your request) by Jo Dee Messina

"The Bed You Made for Me" by Highway 101 (fitting)

If you ARE suffering from heartbreak..do yourself a favor and sing these loud and clear and feel better! IF I'm right, use the ones above to shed your tears and then listen to these so that you can perk up!:

"I'm a Survivor" by Destiny's Child (excellent for feelin' better)

"Watch me Walk Away" by Lorrie Morgan

"Bye Bye" and "My Give a Damns Busted" by Jo Dee Messina

"Fast as You" by Dwight Yoakam

"One Hand in My Pocket" by Alanis Morrisette

"Better Things to Do" by Teri Clark

"Irreplaceable" by Beyonce

Yep, I listen to ALL different kinds of music (cept' I don't care much for hard gangsta rap)

If I'm correct here, you've "got better things to do" than cry over some creep *wink*.

Hugs,
Jasmine

I'm not sure if this will help, but we will give it a try..

First, don't use any treatments on your face that contain any type of alcohol. (when you dry you face out, it just makes more oil = more acne ie. oxy pads)

Stay away from perfumed soaps to cleanse your face with.

If your a girl, use hyper-allergenic make-up and be sure to wash it off (as below) every night!

Try a facial cleansing routine:

EVERY MORNING AND EVERY EVENING-

1. Wash/scrub your face with face wash (Dove or Oil of Olay makes good facial cleansing products that come in a bottle). And rinse your face by hand, ie. throw water into your face.

2. Apply a Toner. (also made by those above..DAB -DO NOT RUB- it on and wait for it to dry)

Then..

3. Apply a face lotion, I would recommend one that is recommended for oily skin.

If you stick to this regimen, it may very well help!

Good luck,
Jasmine

Use a Henna rinse, it is not damaging to your hair and is temporary.

Go on a date with Eddie!!

I realize that you love your boyfriend, but I see some [color=red]"BIG RED FLAGS"[/color] here that truly concern me!:

I think your current boyfriend may show some warning signs of an abuser. Take a look at this list:

He puts your friends down and / or makes it difficult for you to see them. (ie. he won't even let you see your best friend!)

He loses his temper over trivial things.

He has very rigid ideas about the roles of men and women and can't / won't discuss it reasonably.

His mood swings are so erratic that you find yourself constantly trying to assess his mood and only think in terms of his needs. A healthy relationship has give and take.

It's difficult for you to get emotional or physical space away from him - even if you directly ask for it. And if you do get it, he 'grills' you about where you've been and who you were with. (you spend every day with him)

He criticizes you all the time - about your weight, your hair, your clothes, etc.

He makes all the decisions in your relationship and ignores your needs or dismisses them as unimportant. (he won't even allow you to go with him when he goes to the gym)

Trust me, he doesn't have to "hit" you to be abusive. Emotional abuse can be just as devastating..and may likely lead to physical abuse when he feels that he has more control! And trust me it will get worse..been there *frown*

I realize that you want someone to be with you most of the time, but it's better to find someone that is kind and loving...and see them less often, than it is to stay with someone who makes you unhappy no matter how much you love him!

Chase those butterflies sweetheart! *smile*

Hugs,
Jasmine

The obvious answer, as you know is the medication. But if you really don't want to go that route..it's going to take a bit longer, but can be cured.

The cause of yeast infections is due mostly because your vagina isn't getting enough "air" (ie. wearing pantyhose, thick clothing, etc). Also, you can catch it from your partner. AND you can get it from taking anti-biotics.

See..when you take anti-biotics it not only kills the "bad" germs, but it also kills the good "anti-bodies" that helps you fight off fungus. (which is what a yeast infection essentially is: a fungus gone wild.) This fungus IS a natural part of our bodies that always exists (much like staph), but when the good "anti-bodies" are killed, it grows to the extent that it becomes uncomfortable, itchy, sometimes painful, and a problem.

Tips:
Wear cotton panties (no sexy silkies) and try not to "smother" your vaginal area with thick clothing, etc.

Eat yogurt at least 3 times a day (great natural cure).

at night, sleep without panties under your nightie, preferably in a big warm nightgown BUT one that allows a lot of air to get to your vagina.

You could buy a couple of over the counter remedies. One is called AZO Yeast preventative, the other, and I believe this to work faster.. (and you might need to go to the local herbal supplement store for this one) is called "Lactobacillus acidophilus", it usually comes in a chewable tablet that tastes like strawberries. This supplement (Lac Ac) is also present constantly in our bodies, but can be killed off by the ways mentioned above.

Hope this helps!
Jasmine

There are many types of STDs. Unfortunately, the most prominent one among teenagers is Chlamydia and often has no signs especially in females. (btw, stop beating yourself up, been there, done that, got and cured the Chlymadia, and the T-shirt, but no cookies- just heartbreak *frown*- we all make bad decisions that we regret later and/or feel guilty about).

With females Chlamydia has almost no signs, sometimes there will be a pain in your abdomen area (fortunately, I am very sensitive and detected it, but most do not), but mostly there isn't any. Chlamydia can make you sterile!

My best advice is to ANYONE that is sexually active is to make sure that they have a check-up at least once a year, not only to check for STDs, but also for your general sexual health. (cysts, ovarian cancer-which by the way can be passed along too!-, etc)

I wish I could take you..isn't there ANYONE...that you can ask to take you??!! Most times your county clinic is not to far away, and it's free. You might also talk with someone at

http://www.plannedparenthood.com

They have counselors there that are very helpful in these type of situations! They will likely help you find some sort of transportation to the nearest free testing clinic.

Hugs and blessings,
Jasmine

If your friends decided not to trust you just because you changed your look..well, they weren't really your friends in the first place! It may be that they are now uncomfortable around you..

I find it unusual that they would do that just because your "goth". Has your personality changed along with it?

Have you questioned your friends about exactly why they have lost your trust? That may be the best way to mend the gap that seems to have evolved. Communication goes a long way in every relationship.

People fear change, and they fear what they don't understand. Maybe they fear that they don't know you anymore? You need to re-assure them that YOU haven't changed a bit! YOU are still YOU.

Keep in touch! I'd like to help you with this as it progresses,
Jasmine

I'm a 36 year old mom who has too much life experience. I realize that, no matter your age, life throws some crazy curve balls at you when you least expect it. I know in my heart that absolutely no one is perfect..and we all make wrong decisions at one time or another; and sometimes we just need someone to help us out without being judgmental! Furthermore, I think that the only stupid question is the one that you don't ask...knowledge is power.

One of my favorite sayings:
"If you live in a glass house, don't throw stones."

Well folks, we ALL live in glass houses at one time or another!

Never say never,
Jasmine

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