Member Since:
April 1, 2007Answers:
63Last Update:
June 15, 2008Visitors:
5636about
advice
i'm very happy in my marriage,i love my wife and enjoy her companionship,we practically do everything together,she's very understanding, but sometimes she has her mood swings which i know thats normal for anybody to have sometimes, i might ask her a question for example(what are you doing?or babes whats that and she answers me very seriously or ruff.
this is my question how do i know when my wife is responding to me ruff or sarcastically so i wouldnt respond harshly thinking that shes arguing with me when she's not?
every human is an island....... or at least thats what pater says in his da vinci book..... every human is an island... you'll never be able to understand anyone whole and completly including your wife who should be that closest thing to you. so i would say calm down and when she does answer you that way ignore and go occupy yourself with something else until you AND her cool down and then go back and ask her nicely about her day and what is going on (don't be SO direct she may just push you back and not answer) find out what's bothering her and see if you can solve it or talk about it or something... ask her why she reacted the way she did and tell her how you feel about it..... sometimes it maybe that it's just her day and thats how she reacts to things or maybe it's something that is bothering her and she doesn't know how to deal with it. or maybe it could be something you did... it could be a million things so you should find out. if there is nothing... then you should point out how her behavior bothers you.... you guys should be able to discus things openly... thats what brings islands together... :))))
gooluck!
this guy in like 2/6 of my classes seems to hate me even though i haven't done anything to him.
like today, i didn't even look at him and he kicked me.
when i asked why he said i was "a disease".
i don't know what his problem is, but i thought maybe the smart people on advicenators might know that and what i should do.
and rule out "he likes you," because last year i told him i liked him and he was a total jerk the rest of the year, but not abusive.
and then the beginning of this year he was okay and then started being abusive.
D=
hmmm... since your ruled that out i wnt say he likes you..... but perhaps it's because he knows you like him and he'd told his friends and because they didn't react to it as he expected (they probably laughed or goofed of and made it seem like he liked you or so) he reacted violently.... not that you are a "disease" that is just beyond abusive to me!! but what i mean to say boys his age (i am assuming your in middle school?!?!) usually react stupidly and behave in ridicules ways... it doesn't have to be something personal... so don't take it as that... if he continues stand up for yourself and scream at him or throw something (i once threw a dictionary on this guy for bugging me in class and i am usually a good student so they knew it was wayyyy beyond my normal reaction and got mad at him for overdoing things) but dnt go crazy nothing like a chair or a compass or something!!! you don't want to get in trouble!
anyway i hope this helps....
i want to cut my hair when school ends.
i want a drastic change, something short, but not so much that i can't feel my hair on the back of my neck.
at the shortest i would like it chin length with my bangs a little shorter, at the longest i'd like it two inches off each.
the only problem is i don't know if it would look good with my face.
and i don't really want something plain like shorter cut and bangs, i want a whole new style, but not something i would have to curl or straighten my hair with.
by the way, i'm fourteen going into high school and have very straight dark/light brown hair.
i have pictures at http://www.myspace.com but only five and if you need more information just tell me.
thanks ahead of time.
you forgot to mention something.... the shape of your face... anyway i would suggest a hair cut such as the one in http://z.about.com/d/beauty/1/0/6/D/shortbrownhair1.jpg (this is really booming for short hair now a days) just suggest to your hair dresser to cut a thicker chunk for your bangs and give you layers and have your part side ways.... in the morning all you need to do is add a bit of cream or wax or so to keep it the way it should be... it'll give you a sexy mature look. plus you can always go a bit longer than shown in the pictures and it will still give of the same look....
good luck!
hey im 15/f
and i was just wondering what i should wear or like put on to make people actually look at you. i dont mean attractive as in slutty or anything.
Just something i could wear that a guy would look at me... in a good way. or double take again.
what kind of makeuP? i usually wear eyeliner and mascara. grey eyes
i like headbands also. i have a bright highlighter yellow one that i usually don't wear.. but i have it
any kind of jewerly?
well it depends on the kind of guy you want to attract [one] and your natural features so we can know what you need to do [two].... fair dark thin curvy blond plump lips button nose?! that kind of stuff... what you need to do to get ppl to look is to enhance that.... and thats what you need to know how to do ....
Okay, so basically my sister and I fight constantly, physically and verbally. It's been going on for almost two years. I'm tired of it, but espceially tired of crying about it all the time and my parents not doing anything about it, or punishing us by grounding us or something instead of actually trying to solve the problem. Over the past two weeks the fighting has gotten alot worse. So I've been trying to talk to my parents about it, and at first they seemed like they were going to do something about it finally. But I should have known that wouldn't last long. All they did was put us on punishment again, so I got really mad and started yelling at them both about it. That they never actually do anything and my sister still gets to do whatever she wants even though she's on punishment. I'm not trying to sound like the "good child" here, because I do contribute alot to the fights. But my sister always starts them. I just defend myself which pisses her off more and she starts the fight.
So anyway, to sum everything up my parents really aren't doing anything, even though I sat down for literally almost three hours crying my eyes out and talking to them about it last week. They still don't do anything. It's like when I try to talk to my mom about it, she just blames me or says that "she is doing something about it" by grounding us. But she's not fixing the problem, she's putting a band-aid over it.
I feel like there's nothing left to do. Please help me someone. I'm seriously hitting rock bottom here. I'm so tired of having this same fight with my sister and with my parents over and over.
Thank you so much.
hun i am not sure if your older than she is or younger...... i have a younger sib and we fite like cats and dogs mostly coz she starts as well... the thing is unlike your frnds you dont choose your family and there is nothing i could tell you now that would solve the problem (because i am not there with you to see what kind of person, you, her, your parents are) however, i do know that if you think deep enough there just maybe a solution to all this (because you know how they are) with my sib its avoiding her at all costs (coz again my parents used to do the same exact thing your parents are doing) i use to try to talk to her... to shut up wen the fites began... to to to to.... (it was endless) then i just avoided her completely (after she blackmailed me and ratted me out to my parents) there is nothing like ignoring someone.... be nice just dnt be in her way she's somewher you move... she knocks your not there... she says hi you say hi... questions? yes no..... eventually she began to realize how dumb she acted so now she's beginning to come around... i still keep my distance just in case.....but things are healing over time :)
i dnt knw if this helps but i hope it duz... i knw family business is soooo hard!
ok so yeha how do you get some guys to stop making fun of you like today i was just sitting there and this guy threw a pencil at me then threw a pen top at me and hit me in the eye and now my eye looks like it's bleeding from the inside how do i get them to stop like yeah
um.... hun if it ddnt occur to you this is bullying?! you have to report it to someone now i mean its not just making fun of you wen they almost take your eye you knw........ talk to your principle or whoever is in charge... be formal and direct about it.... you can include your parents but try on your own first it always has a different sense of acknowledgment when you go as a mature serious person personally.
guluk and watch out!!
15/m
what can i do with my girlfriend when we make out to make it a little more interesting?
please and thank you
i guess every girl likes something different... i mean each one has an idea of whats romantic and whats "interesting" so it dpns on ur girl....
again if your not sure play it safe..... look her in the eye and smile kiss her softly... simple but sensual is always good so give it a shot :)))))
hope this helps
I lost my voice! agh... it totally sucks because my family kinda makes fun of me because i have to whisper when I talk. So far i'm taking medicine and drinking tea. Getting somewhat rest. is there anything else I can do to regain my voice?? I already missed 3 days of school and cannot afford to miss another day. I also was sick earlier with the flu and i went to the doctor about that, i don't think i should go again because last time was about 3 days ago.
Should i drink something hot or cold?
any medicine that DOES work?
what should i do??? thanks
ok can you keep a secret!?!?!?!
a big weired family secret?!
lol this is what my mum does if i have anything that has to do with the flue, throat, mouth, nose, esophagus..... etc. lol u get the pic:
you'll need
ginger
honey
lemon
orange
combine them to make juice and boil them all together...... drink up when its still hot and within hours you'll start to feel better....
if that dsnt work i dont know what will...
oh btw! before you do that feel out whats happening if its itchy and you feel like you need something cold then you probably do your body knws best and it's probably telling you. but if you find that the cold is making it worse stop asap! its like scratching a mosquito bite ... feels good... leaves a mark!
get well soon! :))))))
I had a friend, last year. We were pretty close. Now it's like this year we've done a lot of fighting. He'll hit me with a horse whip or try to push me out a window, and I'll respond the same way. I've tried ignoring him, though I want us to be friends agein, I;ve tried talking to him, not reacting, being nice, nothing works, could you help me? I really want my friend back. But then sometime he can be so sweet, he's bi-polar and his medication makes him depressed so he dosn't take it, I don't know what I did to him, but I want things to be like they used to be. We go to a boarding school, so I can't get away from him, everywhere I go (But the girls dorm) it seems like he's always there. So I want to know, how can I refill our gap?
Much love
Willow.
oh wow hun i knw how that feels 2 members of my family have MDS.... its not easy to deal with i knw... but you have to b patient.... they usually are convinced they are fine but aren't so you have to be very patient and rational when it comes to dealing with the.... i am surprised that you react in the same way as he duz (when he tries to push you out the window you do the same?!?!) thats not a good sign... he has an excuse what's yours.....
what i am saying is in order to get him back you'll have to start by changing your impulses..... and then you start talking to him... its not healthy if he is not taking his meds you should say something and mention that the lithium dosage isn't right because he shouldnt be getting this depressed.... he need to be balanced and you only need a certain amount of it. too much or too little with make him go crazy... do this and see if he gets back to normal..... i am sure you guys will be frnds in no time!
good luck and stay strong!
Sorry, the last one I sent you was pretty horribly written so you can reject that one.
I'm feeling a little slow today so can you help me again? Is there any way to get rid of your tan? Stay un-tanned? What's a lazer? Does 100SPF really work? I didn't even know there was such a high one.
hey hun it's alright i understood both messages....
i do lazer hair removal for my legs arms underarms and bikini area..... painful as crap but i swear to you its an amaaaazing investment.... i barely have anything in my underarms and arms my legs still need a couple of sessions but after that i am as smooth as a baby :D
this is what spf means:
"SPF. A scale for rating the level of sunburn protection in sunscreen products. The higher the SPF, the more sunburn protection it gives. Sunscreens with an SPF value of 2 through 11 give minimal protection against sunburns. Sunscreens with an SPF of 12 through 29 give moderate protection. Those with an SPF of 30 or higher give high protection against sunburn."
as for whether it works or not... i cant explain how i can go to the beach and come back without the slightest tan except from my cream.... i recommend it highly so if your willing give it a shot it's called photoderm max sun protection spf 100.....
hope this helps!
if you smoke ciggaretts can it delay your period?
well not one cigarette..... i was a smoker and i've been for years... probably since i was about 16 or so ( i quit a week a go! i am still bitter at times but yay i getting there! :D )
well back to ur q.... though it ddnt necessarily delay my period it messed up my face (my skin looked terrible and i swear i feel the difference in just a week) it also made me less athletic and fit so i stopped exercising which again messed my period cycle.... but after a while my body readjusted to it... so at the beginning yes... it is possible for it to alter your body's system but i don't believe only one would do the trick....
hope this helps
I know that most people are wondering how to get tanned...well, I don't like being tanned.
I'm 14/f and I'm Asian so I get tanned really easily and the tan stays for a freaking year. And I don't like being tanned and I want pale skin. Anyways to un-tan???
hmmm well i'd say invest in good spf...... and make sure its higher than 60 to keep pale.... i do lazer so i have to use spf anyway and since my skin is extra sensitive with the lazer and tans really easily as well i usue spf 100 and i am white as a ghost... :))))))
This guy led me on then decided at the last minute that he liked another girl. My friend. I know by fact that he is never going to get her so i want to make shure he knows what he missed out on by not going out with him. We dont really hang out much anymore, but i do hang out in his group sometimes because they are my friends as well. There is also going to be a party we both will be attending next week. How can i show him excatly what he missed out on?!
i don't see why you have to..... would you give him another chance if he asked you out? if so then i may have a few ideas... but is he worth it in the first place leaving you like that last min???
second of all there is no way better than enjoying your time with ppl you like and enjoy that pisses a guy who likes off..... but at that point why do you car?!
go party like an animal you! i am sure there is many guys you can have fun with :))))
friday morning when i was getting ready for school i put on blush and my dad saw me and was like r u wearing blush? and i said yes, and he told me he didn't wanna see me wear it anymore because i'm too young, (and i'm 13!) and he said that it gives you cancer! i was thinking wtf, but is this true?
lol your dad's too cute.... he's just worried about you as i am sure you knw.... what i would do if i were you is reduce the quantity of it so it looks natural and if he asks tell him as sweetly as you could what do you think dad and leave casually... that way your not lying and you get away with it.... anyway if that doesn't work then i don't see why you need it anyway... just apply it later in the day....
oh and as far as cancer goes i've never heard of this before... i've heard of lipstick being made of fishscales and thats about it....never of cancerious blushers.... lol the things parents say.... too cute! :p
I like this guy alot, and he never leaves my mind. Im ALWAYS thinking about him. Im pretty sure he doesnt like me, we rarely talk, which i would like to talk to him more. But idk im not going to ask him out because, i dont think hed say yes, so what are some good ways to feel pretty, flirt a little, and maybe get him to to non-stop thinking about me. Is there anyways i can tell hes thinking of me in some way or anything ??
Please help
thanks =)
honey i have that nature of nonestop thinking too......... its no good... though there are ways to get rid of that....... i won't elaborate siince perhaps you knw.... the sea is big the fishes are infinite so take a pick or enjoy looking it'll take you're mind of that gold fish in a bowl......
well if you barely talk i doubt he'd be thinking about the whole time but i am sure you crossed his mind a few times.... the thing is i keep saying this over and over you don't have to ask him out to go out with him ;) be sly hun.... it's gunna take a while.... mingle with him first try to talk to him about general stuff and befriend him once you're over that stage and established a connection in.. you invite a bunch of ppl and him out..... slowly after that find something in common (prefrably during the day so it dsnt seem like you're asking him on a date) and go together....... for example i am madly in addicted to dessert..... this guy who used to be a friend loved to eat in general... so i was talking about my addiction and he told me how he loved food but ddnt want to over do it because he plays sport.... i kept that in mind (and though i wasn't intrested in that way) later on i asked him out as my frnd to go for dessert ( i knew no one and he was one of the few ppl i met when i first moved) we went out and slowly we started doing things together without any strings attached. now it didn't end in a fairy tale (i had my reasons) he eventually wanted to commit but i ddnt i just gave the vibe.... so even if a guy isn't intrested and you play your cards rite they will get attracted.... you're a female you function like a female you look like a female..... eventually if you spend enough time together a guy (any guy!) will see you that way.... just enhance it. smell good look good (dsnt mean skimpy!) be confident and be yourselffffff you'll only be lying to you if you change....
goodluck diva!
thank you for the advise. now im just writng back in greater detail. ok well it wont be a problem if we hook up or at least i dont think so. my friend just likes him just a little so i dont think she would mind too much. and he definately wouldnt mind haha
ok well last week he kinda sorta acted like he was gonna kiss me. we were just running around being stupid and then he put his hands on my shoulders and got really close to my face. im not sure if he was just playing around or not but i pushed him back. haha i wish i hadn't but i didnt realze he was trying to kiss me until after. so anyways i like your idea about how to kiss him. and i really want to especially now that i think he likes me. this way i never have to actually tell him that i like him or ask him anything. i can just kiss him and wait for the reaction. =) i know just the place to do it too. because after skool he and i are alone.
oh and by the way this would be my first real kiss if he kisses me back so any tips would be great. thank you so much!
Jen
hun i just read your response.... and as much as i hate going into personal experiences i feel that i o it to you to share.... a week and a couple of days ago (and i never make the first move.....ever! i usually get them asking) i decided to tell my friend (who i knew was gay) that i was intrested in him.... i figured there may just be a slight chance that he may be straight .... well again my hunch was right (and i let myself decieve it) he wasn't willing to risk anything even if he was straight. for one thing we are both separating... he leaves for grad school and i stay for a year to finish up..... aand for another he may be having mixed feelings since he'd been gay for a while but has been having thots about girls lately..... so anyway the moral of my boring experience... it hurts like crap! and no matter what you d you won't be able to change it... you cant choose you like or who likes you...so keep him as a frnd gay men usually get past that complicated awkward stage fast... and besides he seems like a sweet guy to have rethot asking you out so as to not hurt you..... PLUS now i am sure you feel free and like so much has been lifted from your back... and trust me it heals with time... summer is coming along soon and there is much fish in the sea to be baited... ;) andddd eyecandy! so enjoy and who knows you may find a cutey in no time....
yarmi
hey jen!
so sorry it took a while my laptop crashed and i lost all my passwords (i'm not too good in memorizing stuff!) so it took a while to bring them back..... i hope i'm not too late :)))
well here goes....... it looks like you guys are already some where since you goof around together alone and he is all physical.... one thing about guys (if they aren't gay) is that they never are THAT comfortable with girls if they didn't have higher motives... meaning, he's either a player or he really does like you.... from the sounds of it i think it's the latter..... but don't base everything you do on that assumption otherwise you won't be able to think straight and act (like pushing him away... btw about that... its soooo hard to keep calm in such a situation so what i do is think about somethng gross or serious like a test or dirty laundry or something... so that you don't move away or loose and oppertunity... remember C.C.C. CALM COOL COLLECTED! he more confident the more attractive)
anyway so about the kiss..... it's a bit tricky... if you master the calmness you can pull it of easily... remember think of a rite moment... my favorite scenario is when a guy and i sit together and do nothing for a minute... it's not awkward silence or anything it's just nothingness... make sure he's close to you at that point and slowly drop in for a lingering peck... smile at him for a few secs (his is where he should give you the kiss back if he wants to... the seconds are for him to gather up the courage) and then move.... don't say a word... if its neccessary just laugh (not giggle) a bit and then get up and suggest you go somewher like a pizza place and talk to him the whole way like you usually do.... but WAIT WAIT WAIT he will be saying something you'll feel it if he won't..... if he says what was that for you say can i kiss you now?! casually and jokingly... and then change topics...
ok so back to when you give him the peck and you're looking at him.....iif things get abit sweeter from there and he goes for another kiss then voila you've got your self honey pooh bear!
as for the kissing part..... usually wen you first kiss a guy for the first time its sweet and soft nothing forcefull or slopy... make sure you have yummy lipgloss on and tasty gum to make sure your breath is fine.... when your lips touch you'll know what to do really there is nothing much to it.... you'll be fine i am sure! you sound playful enough :)))))
goodluck!!!
and most importantly have fun!
13/f
lately, i've been feeling kind of down sometimes.
It's like, when im hanging with my friends, im fine most of the time.
When I'm home, with nothing to distract me, I tend to get very depressed.
Well depressed is a strong, i just feel kind of sad for no specific reason.
I get in a lot of fights with my parents and that stinks, and I like a guy I can never have, but besides for that I have a pretty good life.
What's going on?
What do i do?
Thanks!
hun its normal.... its puberty... i am telling you it suxxxxxxx. there is nothing i can say or do to make it all go away... and there is no advice in the world that can solve it for you but this: join a club or activity or sport or something...it will get your mind of something and you'll become really good at something you like (not to mention your body will thank you for it if you get into sports or so).
i went through this and it only started to fade about a year ago when i was 19.thing is i forced myself to have many activities and now that i am off alone in college, i dnt feel as bad.
when i was in high school i would only feel like that before i go to bed, and thats because that was the only time i had for myself and because when i saw my parents it was only for a few minutes before i was off to do homework study run, dance, go to pilates, read, babysit...etc...
wait!
hey i smell something stinky here! yup... low confidence and negative vibes~ wot do you mean you can never have him?!?! trust me i've seen people who don't belong with each other or were from different social levels or cliques... no it wasnt love at first sight! the girl in the relationship was usually smart and honestly, just herself. HOWEVER... these are some things that i found helped make "herself" glow:
-had confidence that could produce a thousand nuclear weapons (mind you it wasn't snobbery! there is a difference) she just ddnt care wot people say on how she looks (tho if she lookd nice its always a bonus) or anything like that. as long as it felt rite to her she did it.
-she always made sure she smelled good, looked clean, and wore what SHE thot was nice. hygiene!! i cant emphasize that enough.
-spoke to him like any other person (be nice! even though you may be as nervous as hell)
-once you've established friendship be nice and invite him to where ever it is you'd like (u dnt have to officially say its a date just let him decide wot it is)
-think before you act
-smile
-keep eye contact.
-flirt
-say hello when you see him around.
-make small talk. about something you have in common. if you are face to face and have nothing to say dnt make something up you'll look like an idiot. just say hi be quiet for a min if he dsnt say anything excuse yourself and leave. oh and try to talk with someone you knw in the room so it dsnt look like you're not social or something. look at him and smile and keep eye contact. all the better if you continue socializing with others.
-NEVER TELL ANYONE ABOUT YOUR CRUSH. even tho your frnds are loyal. they can help but look if he's around and trust me boys notice and they keep aways. so keep those lips sealed.
-apply this to everyone. if the peolpe around you think youre sweet and confident. chances r he will too. that is when its up to you and them chem between you :))))
p.s: do these slowly. patience is key. if youre usually a shy girl and outta the blue u just decide to be all confident and outgoing its gunna look weired. start by acting a bit composed and collected (C.C.C. calm cool and collected!) and then slowly start talking to people. move to guys. flirt with them. when you feel confident talk to mr golden... good luck!
A couple weeks ago Itunes prompted me to update to the newest version, so I did. Now all of a sudden none of my videos work in Itunes! They all worked before I updated. Has this happened to anybody else? I'm not too computer savy and when I went to the Itunes support site, I found a place where it talked about what to do if videos wouldn't play, but none of it worked. I also haven't messed with any of the settings in Itunes, they are all still the same as when the videos played fine for me. Any ideas? Thanks
ahhh same cr** happend to me a while back and i am still mad! i lost everything....for good. :s
My little sister is 9 now. But when she was 8 she got pregnant. It was a miracle that she and her baby made it through. Now she is pregnant with twins and I don't think it is good! She said she will not slow down and she will have a baby every year of her life! She says she loves being pregnant! My parents dont care. How do I get her to slow down.
my o my!! who was the father? and where are your parents hun?! i don't know what to tell you. at 9 she is still too young to decide whether or not she wants to keep having children! you must tell some one.... here you can contact these people and hopefully they will help her out http://www.aacap.org/page.ww?name=Contact+Us§ion=Contact+Us
ok well im 14/f. and i have had a huge crush on my best friend for a while now. but he told me he didnt like me when he found out i liked him. it was really depressing and all but then i got over him and started liking him again. he never found out that i started liking him again. he still thinks im over him. but last wednessday i found out why he didnt like me. its because he was "confused" about his orientation. but he said he is not anymore and that he is strait. he also told me he loves me. he always tells me he loves me but the way he said it was different. he said "did i ever tell you i love you? alot. i mean really alot." it was the nicest thing ever and well im not sure if he likes me. because before it seemed like he did but it turned out he only wanted to be friends. he led me on in a way but its not his fault. now that he is strait i think he could like me. and he doesnt know i like him though. i want to kiss him so badly but i think that would be a bit sudden. should i tell him how i feel? or should i just go for it? oh and by the way my friend also likes him. and he knows it. i appreciate the help.
Jennifer&hearts
before i give you any advice.... is it gunna b a problem if you and him hook up? would your friend be mad at you??? and would it be worth it? if it is here goes...
kiss him! don't kiss him on the lips though.... but close enough on the cheek where it is really near to the edges of his lips.... and hold him by the shoulders so you have balance and aim. and so he dsnt move..... when you're done move away slowly look him in the eye and smile... linger for a moment coz there may be a chance for him to kiss you back and this time KISS kiss you ;). BUT DONT STAY MORE THAN A COUPLE OF SECONDS!
if he says what was that for say "oh so i can't i kiss you now?" and leave it to him. just be confident.
and if he fidgets just laugh it of and say what?
i hade rejection so i never ask a guy if he likes me or not. i prefer to see this in action that way i'll look like i am just playful or flirtatious and comfortable around my guy friends....