Gender:
FemaleMember Since:
March 12, 2008Answers:
116Last Update:
February 15, 2011Visitors:
8682Main Categories:
General Sex Questions
Love Life
Friendship
View All
about
advice
15/f
i have an eating disorder, bulimia. i don't really eat lunch and people are starting to bug me about it. i haven't eaten it since like 7th grade but anyways i know i need help..i just haven't actually said it or convinced myself fully yet. i don't want to die but i don't feel that i will. also i have realized i don't want to live with this for the rest of my life. feeling like crap all the time, feeling guilty for throwing up food and wasting it, feeling guilty for eating, and everything. i don't know why i have this. I guess my question is what should i do? how should i tell someone something like this?
i was thinking of going to a school counselor, i'm not sure.
any advice about anything, related to this would be great =] thank you so much.
the first thing you need to do is tell your parents. believe it or not, our parents will have our back through the worst times of of life, even if it was our fault that we made such a bad decision.
do your closest friends not know whats going on with you? thats why we call them our 'best friends.' they are people who we can tell anything and everything to. and you always know that they will have your back no matter what.
when im in a bad situation, i ALWAYS go to my best friend and it seems like she has the magic touch and knows exactly what to say. which i am so grateful for, because just listening to certain words that someone can say, really does change my perspective on so much and draws me away from the problem.
a school counselor could be a very good idea as well. and im sure they could give you or your parents a number to someone who deals with this for a living.
im glad to hear that your fed up with living this way, and that you realize you need help. im sure thats hard enough to do and i have a lot of respect for you for that.
make sure you talk to someone about this asap.
good luck girl
(:
Well here's what I've been debating with myself for the past couple of weeks:
This girl and I briefly were seeing each other last summer. We hung out at least once a week at the end of May through the middle of August last summer. When mid august came around she decided that she was not ready for a relationship so we decided to remain friends. We still hung out, probably about once a month August through November, but still kept in touch on a weekly basis through e-mail. She even hung out with my friends and I in October. The holidays rolled around, so we really couldn't hang out. We tried to get together a
couple of times, but things didn't work out. One day at the end of February I
sent her a text and asked if she wanted to hang out and catch up. I usually get a response back, so i figured it may have not gone through. So i sent her an e-mail asking if she had received it. She replied back a couple of days later and said that she did and was just really busy with work and other things. However out of the blue in the e-mail she also said "I don't
want to be anything more than friends" and ended the e-mail by saying that she
was going to hang out downtown in a couple of weeks and that i could join her and her friends of i wanted to. This really confused me since we already had this conversation back in August, so i replied back and told her that I wasn't looking for anything more than friends and i am sorry if i came off that way. She than responded back: "now that I am confident that we're friends, we should catch up, i didn't want to lead you on by texting you back or hanging out with you, we should catch up" I responded by telling her i didn't think that she was leading me on, and that the next time there's an issue that she should call me so we can talk it out. I haven't received a response since and this was at the end of February.
Now she did come off as a little vain, which surprised me. She's actually a
really sweet girl. The debate I've been having is whether or not to shoot her an e-mail and invite her to grab food, so we can talk or should i just
consider this a loss and move on? If i should e-mail, what should i say?
Thanks
one reason for her not responding could very well be that she has been really busy, and im sure her intentions have been to reply to you but maybe she just hasnt had the chance to.
if your really set on trying to have a good friendship with this girl, you shouldnt give up. so i think emailing her would be fine.
but in this case, how about you try to make it a little more personal and actually give her a call. if she sees that your calling her, she will know that you still have your mind set on being friends with her and she will ackowledge that.
just have a simple conversation with her asking how her day has been, and what she has been up to. then your going to end the conversation with, "id really like to see you and catch up. would you want to get some dinner sometime soon?"
if she does want to be friends, she will have no problem accepting your offer.
it seems to me like this girl does mean a lot to you and im glad that you would rather have her in your life as a friend than nothing at all. since you do have these feelings for her, whatever you do, dont let this oppurtunity get away.
life is short; we need to make the best of things, and when we want something to go our way, its our job to make it happen.
good luck
(:
If you don't have sex at all, can you tell if your "Cherry" popped? or is it like, you never really know when it did. Again, if you HAVE NOT had sex. or is it like, it seems like a period? I'm just a little confused is all.
when your cherry pops all you notice is some bleeding.
i wouldnt say its like a period, because it isnt as much blood as you would get while on your period, and it definiatly doesnt last long at all.
(:
Well, the other day I was talking to my boyfriend and he asked me "how far I wanted to go". To be honost, I really don't know. I had planned to stay abstinent until marriage, but I know that as I get older, I might lose my current, or future, boyfriend if I don't want to do very much sexually. I mean, I don't know. I'm only 14 so I think i'm to young to be "sexually active", but it seems as if everyone's doing something like that.... I just don't know what to do...are guys going to pressure me to do this stuff when I get into highschool? I guess i'm just afraid of being the last person considered "prude". Thanks, any advice welcome.
i think being abstinent until marriage is like the biggest challange to overcome, because to be honest, you will feel pressured or tempted to have sex in high school and college. and for the people to actually stick it out until their wedding night, i have the up most respect for.
dont ever feel obligated into doing something just because it seems like everyone else but you is doing it.
and just a heads up, your not going to be the only person who enters high school that is a virgin, and i gaurentee you wont be the only one to leave that way.
theres a lot of talking that may be going around between people, but that whole 'everyone does it' is seriously so far from the truth. i promise you.
remember to respect yourself and what you believe in. when your ready, you will know. dont listen to any one who trys to tell you different, because their opinions dont matter when it comes to you and your personal life.
(:
16/m
Yesterday i aksed this girl out that i realy liked her so finally i asked her and she said yes. well now everytime we are together shes always quiet, im always doing most of the talking, I dont want our relationship to be plain i want to connect with her but she quiet even with her freinds they told me she was just as quiet. I just want to know how to gain her trust so she can talk to me more, i dont want to lose her please somebody help!!!
there are plenty of shy girls out there, mainly because they prolly just dont feel like they have enough confidence yet. which is totally fine; they will overcome it eventually. it takes time.
when a girl is totally quiet around you its your job to make her feel more comfortable and sort of help her let loose a little.
you can try playing that '20 questions' game. just go back and forth with a simple question, about anything at all and hear eachothers answers.
try opening up to her some and let her know that its ok to open up to you as well. when she sees that your a fun and interesting guy, she will start to see that its ok to give in as well.
try to not have any silent moments while you guys are talking, because that might make her tense up some more and it will just be extremely akward for her. and we dont want that.
make her laugh too. that will work.
good luck (:
heyy. i really liked the advice i saw you give. so im 14 and a female. i really like this guy who goes to my school and in my grade. we are always talkin and textin each other. and we always flirt. all my friends tell me to ask him out and all his friends tell him to ask me out. i know he likes me, but if he does why dont he ask me out then? i really want to go out with him,but if i ask him out what if he says no, then out friendship would be weired. should i wait for him to make the first move and ask me out, or should i make the first move and ask him out???????
thanks :]
well i already know that you both have the same feelings towards each other since you both seem to be talking a lot. so thats good.
believe it or not, guys are just as scared to do some things. especially at asking out a girl. they get nervous beyond belief, which shows that they really do like you but their something is holding them back because they too are hate rejection.
you need to take charge and make this happen. if you dont want to be the one to ask him out, then reel him in to doing it himself.
in other words, show him that you are interested and dont hold back. make him feel comfortable enough to be himself around you and everything should go smooth from there.
if a guy is intimidated, then he will tense up and he will be terrified to make any kind of move.
so show him what you have to offer, and soon enough he will be asking you out in no time. i promise.
(:
There is this kid named Cody Meckly in my school, he is in 6th grade though, I am in 8th. I dont like him or anything, but yet I went out with him as a joke. I know I felt so bad cuz he used to always say I was beautiful. I didnt like him but he was sweet and I wouldve seriously dated him if he wasnt so immature, I broke up with him and he said that he was cheating on me, IF I HATED THIS KID, WHY DOES IT MAKE ME MAD????
i think its an instant reaction to get upset over something like that, even though you have no feelings towards him.
you may have felt kind of betrayed so becoming angry was just a sign of showing what you were feeling. on the other hand, how do you think he felt when he heard that he was getting dumped? not too good i bet.
so saying he was cheating on you may just as well have been something to blurt out due to anger.
i know you said that you felt bad about going out with him only as a joke, and im sure you had good intentions overall, but no one likes the feeling of being used you know?
all of this will pass, as well as your frustration from the situation.
and remember-- treat people how you want to be treated.
(:
Im 13 and i am a female
There is a guy at school that I really like and we have been friends for a really long time, but recently we got in a fight and now things are better but, our relashionship hasn't really been the same. I don't know how to tell him that I love him. You know the feeling that you are just supposed to be with someone but you don't know if they feel the same way? Well that is how I feel. I know that he likes me though because I talk to him and flirt with him and text him all the time, I just think that he likes other people more than he likes me. It doesn't really bother me that I don't know if we will ever be a couple, but it really bothers me because I see what our realationship could be and I want it to be that way. I can never get my mind off of him. It feels like when I dont' see him there is a huge hole in my heart. I love him more when he is not around. The days that we talk I wish that he would ask me out and the days that i don't talk to him, I feel weak and like he took a big chunk of me with him. i know you are probably wondering how a 13 year old could feel this way, but i just do. I love him. And i wont be satisfied with myself until he asks me out or he just tells me that he loves me. I can tell he loves me, but i dont think he will ever say it out loud. What should i do? I need advice!!!
this happend to me before, except i never got to express my feelings towards him.. it was too late, and everything fell apart before i knew it.
what i learned from my mistake is that you need to tell people how you truely feel. NEVER EVER hold something back when you have such a strong feeling.
so my advice to you, is to get alone with him and tell him pretty much everything you wrote on here. basically tell him how much you care about him and how you feel that you guys should take it to the next level. dont leave anything out, because in the end it will pay off to get this off your chest.
i dont know where you two stand right now and why your not anything more than you want to be, but it could be that hes not completely sure what your feelings are towards him, and hes too afraid to express himself.
everyone is afraid of rejection and heartbreak. but honestly, your never going to know what could have been if you dont put yourself out there and stand up for what you want.
so dont sit back and wait for something to happen. if its meant to be, it will. but you need to make an effort in order for everything to fall into place.
be confident and go after him girl, and good luck! (:
16/f...so my prom is this saturday and afterwards i know my and my boyfriend are just going to hit up a whole bunch of random parties. and i dont know what to wear! i dont want to stay in my dress cause its hella expensive but i still wanna look sexy/not be over or underly dressed. i bought a little black dress that i could just throw on instead of my actual dress so its still formal but idk. please help!
ohh prom, what a night to remember. i loved it.
changing out of your dress is a very smart idea, i actually dont know any girl who stayed in their prom dress for the after partys. although, almost all of the guys wore their tux's..but thats just a guy thing im guessing.
a cute little dress and heels are the perfect outfit for this occassion. and since your hair will already be styled from prom, your going to be looking gorgeous for any party you show up to!
have fun at prom girl (:
I'm turning 16 in 30 days and I need to get in shape for my party so my dress doesn't make me look like a sausage hooker. I weigh 225 pounds right now. I know right seriously I'm a fat ass but I need help. I made up this plan to lose weight. I want to get down to 125, 130. So I also have a wedding in 60 days that I want to get toned up for. Here's my plan:
The days when I have off:
-Elliptical machine for 20 minutes.
-The Firm
-Tae-Bo
-Set of 50 push-ups.
-Set of 50 sit-ups.
-Ride bike for an hour.
-Lift small weights. (to tone my flabby ass arms)
The days when I have class:
-Elliptical machine for 20 minutes.
-The Firm
-Set of 50 push-ups.
-Set of 50 sit-ups.
-Ride bike for half an hour.
-Lift small weights.
Okay so then I like planned out what I would eat and stuff.
For breakfast I would eat a bowl of berry burst cheerios which is 100 calories, and a banana. Then at around 10:30 I would eat a cup of yogurt which is 170 fucking calories. For lunch (on my days off at least) I would have a slice of Elio's pizza which is a lot of calories I bet. So then I would have some grapes between dinner and lunch and then for dinner have a salad. I mean I can't do this when I have class because I can't be like oh hey guys im gonna eat in the middle of class, you know?
What I'm asking is is this a good plan? I reallyyyy need to lose this weight. THANK YOU!
first of all happy early birthdayy! (:
and to be honest, i really dont think it will be possible to lose as much weight as you would like in such a short amount of time. that would be so cool if weight seriously dropped in an instant though wouldnt it?
keep doing all those exercises that you talked about doing; staying motivated is key to accomplishing a goal.
as for food, eat a ton of fruits and veggies. they are delishious and healthy. thats like double points right there. try to cut back on carbs, and bread and all that. make sure to drink lots of water, and actually i would recommend drinking only water. no soda's, not even diet.
ever heard of special k? they have branched out from cereal, to waffles, to protien drinks, to little snacks. it all tastes really good, and it is good for you too. so you may want to consider trying that.
**remember this phrase:
buy a dress that fits you, not the other way around.
in other words, if you lose some weight or no weight at all, your still beautiful. and you can buy a dress that flatters you the way you are.
have a wonderful birthday hun!
okay so theres this reallyyyyy hot kid whos ive been obsessed about for like ever and now im finally friends with him. one problem, i have a boyfriend and we've been going out for almost 6 months. btw im in 10th and theyre in 11th. umm and i really llike my bf but idk now im kinda feeling like restrained and i cant do anything if you know what i mean, cause this really hot kid thats im now friends with i think likes me. would you rather be with the one you love or the one who loves you? so idk what to dooooo! someone please help me
something that you should NEVER do is dump your boyfriend for someone who you think is better. i mean, if you and your current boyfriend are having problems and are fighting a lot, theres really not much you can do if you no longer feel the need to solve the problems that you may be having.
im assuming you still have feelings for your boyfriend, right? are those feelings not strong enough to stay with him?
my opinion is if this other guy who you have liked for a long time never gave you the time of day before, is he really worth giving up someone who has been in your life longer just because he just now realized that he likes you?
i know what i say will only go so far when it comes to if you want to listen to it or not, but ill give my input anyway and you can take it how youd like to.
if i were you, i wouldnt give up my guy that i love for anyone. love is such a strong emotion and you need to treat it the right way. i would do what my heart tells me to, and in this case i hope your heart tells you not to leave your boyfriend.
there will always be guys who are tempting and will make you think if they are the better boy for you, but in the long run i think you already have it good.
continue staying friends with that other guy though. because you never know, you could get a very good frendship out of him.
good luck with what you decide to do girl.
(:
I have this problem with guys. Like every single time I date a guy and I like them lot and stuff. But I end up breaking up with them in the end. It's like I can't commit to just one guy. I want a long-term relationship but I can't cause I can't commit. Its like when I start getting attached I push him away. How could I commit to just one guy and actually stay with him and not break it up? Any advice or suggestions? Thanks in advance!
that sounds exactly like me. just know that your not the only girl out there who thinks shes not ready to commit.
it could be two reasons:
one may be that the guys your dating just arent the right guys for you, and therefore it will never work out. and im really glad that you arent forcing yourself to stay with one guy just because you want a relationship. never settle for just anyone.
the second reason could be that since your telling yourself that you cant ever commit, its stuck in your head that way. you need to not think about it so much, and just let whats meant to be take its own course.
i guarentee if you just roll with what your feelings may be with a certain guy, it will all go into place.
you will find someone who you are comfortable with to be committed to for an extended period of time. sometimes great things take time, and i think thats the case this time.
so dont worry.
be pacient, dont stress yourself out too much and good luck (:
so my boyfriend i wanna do it,but it is both his and mine first time.we wanna know how it will feel and also what to expect afterwards?
aw i think thats really cute that you guys are eachothers first time. i wish that happend to me.
since this is your first time, make it something you two will never forget.
for you it might hurt a little bit, so when it does just let your boyfriend know and tell him to slow down some. also, make sure hes wearing a condom. thats a must (:
if you guys are comfortable with eachother, then the afterwards part wont be anything akward or anything, so dont worry. just cuddle when you get done; its great.
i think you should set the mood and have the lights dimmed and have candles and such around the room. it will get you in the moment and you will love it.
also, make sure to have fun! (:
soo im 15 and i have the most amazing gf in the whole world but the only problem is im in love with this guy to and i cant choose between them
well you need to ask yourself who are you more comfortable with.
a big factor on relationships is that the person your with becomes your best friend. someone you tell everything to and they know the real you inside and out.
since your with the girl right now, make sure you stay faithful to her. dont go behind her back and see the guy too. you need to have trust in your relationship. remember that.
so if i were you, i would just think to myself which person would be better for me in the longrun.
love is something to cherish. its a serious thing. and by what you wrote, you never said anything about being in love with your girlfriend, you just said that about the guy.
im not going to tell you who to choose, thats no ones decision except your own.
personally, i think that you already know who you want. you just need to go with your instinct.
(:
I do not know where to start but to make the long story short i hate my self and my life I am 25 years old i am not capable of having any kind of relationship cause I am the person you want call when u r having bad times however I am never there when u r having good time. Moreover,I finished law faculty but hate it so never practiced.I have done my master degree on something else, event management, but hate it as well. Right now I do not know what I want to in my life. So I have start to think best thing to is commit suicide....do you know the easiest and quickest way to do it.
suicide is NEVER the answer. im sure you may hear that a lot, but its so true.
your only 25 years, and believe it or not, you still have so much more living to do. life works in mysterious ways sometimes you know? right now your getting this curve ball thrown at you but you cant let that get you down.
overcoming something is such a great feeling.
my advice to you is to look into a job that has your interest. you need to find something that you love doing everyday, because if your not even interested in your work, you will be misrerable going to it in the mornings.
as for the relationship issue, everyone has their downfalls when it comes to finding someone. im sure im not as expierenced as you when it comes to love and all that becuase im only 18. but i believe its so worth the wait to find someone who truley and deeply cares for you.
have you ever heaqrd the saying 'Love is the closest thing to Magic'? why wouldnt you want to live your life and expierence that for yourself? everyone deserves a wonderful feeling like that.
the people that you surround yourself around now may not be the right people for you. so branch out, and meet new people.
i hope you do reconsider your actions and realize that you are a special person who deserves a great career, a ton of close friends, and someone who loves you more than anything; vise versa.
hope i helped (:
okay, i have no idea where to put this question so i'll just put it here. okay, well i'm ALWAYS angry, or mad. i don't know why. its ruining my relationship with my friends and family. i can't help it its like if the slightest thing is happening i'll like freak out. i hate it. i say what i want when i want. i tell people what i feel when i feel about it..i can't help it. councling won't work...i've tried that...but should i try agian? i mean, i have NO idea why i act like this. and for the most time i don't think i'm that bad but others do. i really want to change. you know be a better person all around. get a better life. part of this is because like there are 3 kids in the family i'm the middle and least favorite. i try REALLY hard in school so i can get into a good college and get out of here. i hate it here. i really want to leave. but everything i do isn't good enough. so i stopped caring...and did it for me and i did SO good in school. I don't know what to do anymore..how do i become a better person? how do i stop myself from saying mean things? the smallest things bother me...
PLEASE help this is ruining my life!
i think everyone may get angry sometime in their lifetime, honestly i dont know the reason behind that, it just happens.
it seems to me that you may just need some time apart from your everyday life. as in your family and your enviorment. im not saying that what your feeling is going to make you completly want to forget about everyone you love, but sometimes we just need our space.
so look at it this way,
keep working your butt off in school like you have been doing. and once college comes around, it will pay off so much. you will be glad to know that you are at a wonderful university, AND this can be the time where you get your freedom from all the drama that you may have in your life right now.
think of it as a new beginning of a new chapter in your life.
as for the counseling, i would try and give it another shot. but try to aim for a higher kind of counseling like a shrink or somewhere in that area. their life is to truley listen to what teenagers have to say and they will give you their input as well.
sometimes all we need is someone to talk to. it relieves so much stress from our shoulders, no joke. so i would advise you to try that as well. just sit down with your best friend and talk to her about what has been going on lately.
i hope everything works out girl. (:
im looking for a new job because i work at a drycleaners and its not worth what im being paid so was wondering:
1. where do you work?
2. how much does it pay?
Thanks!
well i dont know how old you are, but im assuming your at least 16.
i work at old navy and it pasy $7.75 an hour. i get really good shifts, so its very good money.
if your at least 18, you should try being a server. the pay is like 2-3 something an hour, but the tips are unbelivable, so its worth it.
(:
i bought this prom dress but i have 30 days to return it. i am not sure if i like it or not.
http://img404.imageshack.us/img404/7526/img4458yo3.jpg
that is a picture of me wearing it. do you think it is formal enough? does it even look good? please be honest.
its cute.
but as a prom dress, i dont think its dressy enough.
I'm a 42 y/o single man. Less then a month ago my best friend died in an accident. I have not been able to come to grips with his death. I have recently been having thoughts of ending my life. This happens whenever I am alone, especially at night. I have lost loved ones before, including my parents and brother all within a year of each other, but I never felt this type of despair, or loneliness. I am afraid I may eventually give in to my suicidal urge. Can anyone help me?
im really sorry about your loss. i could say i know what your going through and how you must be feeling, but that would be a lie. i personally have never been put in a situation like you are right now. but if i were, i would just pray each and every night. god works in mysterious ways and i believe that a little prayer can go a long way. this is the time to have friends near you, it might be good to talk to someone about what you are feeling. there is always someone there to listen. good luck, and i hope everything works out for you.
I'm friends with this guy, and whenever we talk, he's always like making contact with me. Like we were having a conversation this morning in school, and he would have his hand on like my waist.
And then we were messing around, and he just grabbed my hands, and was holding onto them.
Also, randomly he'll just hug me and hold me tight.
Is this a sign of him being interested?
Thanks!
oh yeah. hes into you (: