I'm a woman in Texas. I'm married and have a school-aged child. I have a medical background. I'm quite liberal, socially. I love helping people with medical, parenting, and social questions. Don't ask me about tech stuff or finances, because I need advice on those things myself!
Gender: Female
Location: Texas
Age: 34
Member Since: December 17, 2006
Answers: 795
Last Update: September 2, 2007
Visitors: 50062
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Xenolan
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How do you deal with a grown woman (this is a friend of mine) that has to have every comment you say to her spelled out (explained)? And do you know why she does this. Here are two examples: (1) Her boyfriend did her taxes and asked her to help him proof it and when he asked her to read something she asked him; why would I read that that is information you know I know; (2) she was driving her uncle to the store and her uncle knows she always goes that way to this store but when her uncle questioned if she was going the right way and when her uncle admitted she was right and he was wrong she said why would you question me when you know I always go this way. (link)
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I would say that woman is very unhappy and confrontational. She needs to stop taking things personally and analyzing everyone's motives. She should just relax or no one is going to be able to be him/herself around her. Tell her so. If she doesn't want to change, decide whether you want to be around someone who's so difficult to be with.
Sabine
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My boyfriend and I have been dating for 6 months now. Everything is going really well, but I have one concern: he's a Republican and I'm a die-hard liberal. Because I have this knowledge, I avoid any type of politial discussion with him. My friends are convinced that this will lead to our demise, but I don't know. I love him very much, we get along so well, and he makes me very happy, but I sometimes feel like I'm hiding my feelings about certain subjects from him. This is not like me at all; I'm a very opinionated!
I'm wondering if I should end it before we get in too deep because of this, or if I should just stay with him and allow whatever happens to happen.
Thank you all in advance! (link)
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I would say you should give him a chance. It's possible he's one of those rare Republicans who is tolerant, well-spoken, and rational. I would just casually let my ACLU card fall out of my wallet so he can see and if he has a freak-out, then you'll know. I've met a few nice Republicans. Think of it this way - maybe he's scared to talk to you because he's heard that your're an opinionated, ball-busting, feminist liberal. Maybe he'll be relieved to hear that you have intelligent things to say. Every relationship is made up of two people who may differ on important issues. It's time to find out whether you can make it as a couple despite the differences.
Good luck.
Sabine
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okay so Friday i got my first period and i didnt go to school. its really gross because its like a REALLY heavy flow and it is just so gross. i have pads like carefree original.. but i dont like them. i mean they dont work well and i keep getting stains and its so gross. i dont like the brand im using and find it so gross about like the flow and everything. and im so worried like i have school on monday and this is my first period. like what the heck am i suppose to do? like .. wear am i suppose to put the pad and stuff. i dont even want to use a pad but like i guess im kind of embarresed to ask my mom to go get me tampons. and even if i DID have tampons to try like firstly, i would have no idea what to do like to get them in and like when to change them ect. AND like what brand would be good because i have like sports and crap. this is so overwelming for me because its my first time. and ALSO i hate the feeling i have like when like theres a flow because i just like feel so dirty (and since i have been grounded for like a week i've been home alot) and i just like take a bath and stuff and i feel clean. like this whole thing is just ew.
any advice??
ew. =] (link)
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Yeah. It's kind of gross. You can get pads like Always with wings. They're more comfortable. Scented products can disguise some of the odor. If you get tampons, ask for Tampax Pearl or something with a plastic applicator and get the slender or junior absorbency. Change it every 4 hours at least. To get them in, there are instructions on the sheet inside the box, but you basically hold your labia apart with your non-dominant hand, put your thumb and ring finger on of the other hand on the middle part of the tampon, at the base of the top component, then push the top part in until your fingers touch your vagina, then, with your index finger, push the sliding stick in to insert the tampon inside. You may have to try different positions, like standing in front of the toilet with one foot on the lid. You may want to use a pantyliner with your tampon because you can still leak a little. Good luck.
Sabine
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I had a miscarriage on Jan 15 and I wanted to know when my period should start (link)
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Your hormones will be irregular for a while. There's no telling when your body will be regulated enough for you to ovulate again and then have another period, but it will likely be within 1-2 months.
Sabine
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IF your credit card number is stolen and used to purchase items. Is there anyway to get that money back or prove you didnt buy those goods? (link)
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Immediately call your credit card company. I believe that federal law in America limits your liability for fraudulent use to $50 or something and your credit card may have other provisions. You can prove it by asking the company to retrieve the slips that were signed and comparing them to your signature on file. But call the company right away and get the credit card number cancelled.
Sabine
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i live in ontario canada, im not sure exactly if that has anything to do with it, but it something that he didnt want me to know because i might do it? i dont know. But if you have any information, please let me know
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I wish I really knew, but all I do know is that in the silly, but addictive, show Degrassi, someone was emancipated at 16 and got help with living expenses from Children's Aid (?). I don't really know what your legal rights are because I'm a few thousand miles away in Texas. I hope you're able to figure it out, though. Maybe a school counselor could help you with your options.
Sabine
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Ok, when I wear lightweight shirts like tee-shirts and stuff, I sweat! I use good anti-persperant, but it doesn't work. What is wrong with me! (link)
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Look up hyperhydrosis. See if it fits you. On the other hand, I used to have that exact same problem and it would get better when I switched! Oddly enough, like my shampoo, sometimes my deodorant stops working and another brand works better. I don't know why, but my guess is that when I was a teen, my body chemistry kept changing as I was growing, changing activities and diets, changing laundry soaps and body washes, etc. Right now I'm successfully using Secret Platinum soft solid. I hope you can find out what works for you. Otherwise, doctors can prescribe a special antiperspirant for you.
Sabine
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on the show juvies this kid had to take a drug test and it came out positive, is that good? (link)
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Probably not good. A positive drug test means that they have found substances they were testing for.
Sabine
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I have blue sofas and my boyfriend doesn't want to throw them out.
But we're redecorating so im gonna have to work with them.
I have no idea what colour (for the walls) that will go with the sofas.
We have hard wood flooring. And I don't really want any bright colours.
Does anyone have any suggestions? (link)
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Have you looked at slipcovers? You can get them at Bed, Bath, and Beyond, Target, Kohl's, Ikea, etc. And any other ideas would depend on what shade, texture, and level of formality your sofas are. For example, they could be blue velvet, blue tweed, or demin and all would lead me in a different direction with decor.
Sabine
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I'm a 14/f. Well im not sure if i bi or not because i would definitely never get into a relationship with a girl, but i just think that doing sexual things with girls would be less stressful and more pleasureful because they would know what feels good. Like sometimes when i get SUPER horny and masturbating isn't enough, i feel like asking my best friend to do something with me...but i never do DONT WORRY!! I know im striaght but deep down id love to do stuff with a girl. (link)
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My advice is not to decide right now. You can be either bi or just curious, but what does it matter? Right now you know that you identify as straight but that you'd like to experience sex with another girl. It doesn't need a label.
Sabine
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Okay, so i heard my dad talking about once i turn 16 i can move out of the house whenever i wanted, but my parents would still have to look out for me. There was something else he said.. but he was whispering it to his girlfriend and when i asked him about it he was like.. you would be a big girl.. so he was obviously hiding something. My parents have been going to court lately over child custody and stuff and i wondered if anyone knew anything about turning 16 and what are some of the legal things that i can do. I turn 16 in july by the way. Anything can help, someone who would know politics would be helpful too. Thanks (link)
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I really wish I could tell you more, but in order to get your question answered, I do have this advice for you. Could you please add information about where you live? Then you could also do a search on the internet on the rights of minors in your state, etc.
Sabine
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Okay im only 14!! turning 15 in a few months..well anyways me and my boyfriend have been going out for about a year and we`re still virgins and my mom is all like "you are getting birth control" and i say"no i dont want it" and i dont get why my mom wants me to be on it so bad. i mean me and my boyfriend obviously talked about it but im not ready to lose it till im about 16 going on 17.. and my mom keeps pressuring me and another reason why i dont want to do it is cause it makes you fat.. how do i get her to stop!!. please help me (link)
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Well, one thing I would do is promise her that I would tell her if I was starting to change my mind. Tell her that birth control pills have a lot of side effects and you don't want them. Tell her that if she's worried that you will decide suddenly one night that you want to have sex, you will use condoms and then tell her that she can leave one in your bathroom or something. If she wants, she can check to see if it's still there and as long as it's still in the bathroom, that means you have not yet had sex and aren't thinking of it. If she ever finds it gone, that means you need to talk about birth control again. Does that make sense? Just emphasize to her that you are mature and responsible and that she can trust you to be open about your needs. Be sure you know all of the facts about getting pregnant, including the fact that he does not have to orgasm inside you in order for sperm to get inside and cause pregnancy.
Sabine
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Okay so I am the biggest complainer EVER. I complain about EVERYTHING, like when I'm talking to someone, without even thinking I just start going on a complaining rant. Idk why, my life isn't that bad and other people are probably thinking that I have a horrible life or something. Ahh. It's just a bad habit, though... sometimes, I try my hardest to act all sunny and positive but in reality I'm just pessimistic and I HATE it! I wish I could just appreciate my life and not complain so much because I know it can be much worse. And now everyone feels all bad for me because I always complain and they're like "aww, I'm sorry you're sad" or whatever. I don't want people feeling bad for me! How can I stop complaining and being so negative?? (link)
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Start writing a journal. That way you can express the things that are irritating you without having to endure others' irritating sympathy. ;) And I used to be more negative until I had to go through something truly bad (life-threatening illness) and then I had to really fight for life. Since then, things just don't have the power to affect me as much as they used to. I hope you don't have to go through the same things. There's this purple bracelet movement where you get a purple rubber bracelet and the goal is to wear it on one arm for 21 days or something like that. But every day you complain, criticize, or gossip, you have to move your bracelet to the other arm. I, personally, would never do that because complaining is sometimes helpful and gossip is fun as long as it's truthful and not mean. Another way to do it is to ask your friends to tell you when you're complaining and explain that you'd like to cut down. Reserve one friend or someone like a sister or mother, to whom you can complain for, say, 10 minutes at the end of the day. You have to wait until then.
Good luck. It's a noble thing to see what's wrong with your life and try to change it rather than complaining about it.
Sabine
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I got a new cat in March of 2006. My other cat before her was an outside cat more than an inside one. But one night she got hit by a car, and we had to put her to sleep.
When I got my new cat, my family and I decided to make it an indoor one, so the same thing wouldn't happen to her. We live on a very busy street so I felt it was OK to make her an indoor cat. But I feel horrible every day that she can't go outside. We already declawed her, so we can't just make her an outdoor cat. And yeah, I feel a little bad for declawing her because I feel it's inhumane, but she was ripping stuff up, and tearing carpets and furniture up.
When I see her every day, looking at the window, she just looks and sounds like she is sad, and I keep feeling I should of made her an outside cat, but I don't want the same thing to happen to her, as to what happened to my other cat. She just always looks depressed. I seriously don't know, but how can I tell how she is feeling?
Also, am I doing what is right for my cat? I mean if I was stuck indoors all my life I would be pretty depressed, yet I don't want my cat to feel the same way. What can I do?
Thanks for reading and anything is greatly appreciated! (link)
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That does sound sad. There are two things you can do. You can try to leash train your cat so she can go out with you. The other is that you can buy big cages that stay outside and allow the cat to get some outdoor time with fresh air and grass to eat, etc. It's a tough call. If you can get to a Petsmart or call a shelter, someone can help you decide what to do. It's sweet that you're so concerned about your kitty.
Sabine
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I had unprotected sex 2 days ago!and I don't want to get pregant!what should I do? (link)
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Get yourself immediately to a Planned Parenthood or a doctor and ask for Plan B.
Sabine
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well I was cleaning my ear with a Q-tip and then all of a sudden i can't hear with that ear no more ike it's clogged or something but I cleaned it with a Q-tip and now I only hear like fizzy buzzing noises out of this ear! help! (link)
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You likely pushed some ear wax inside your ear canal and it blocked the eardrum. What you can do is this: Go to the store and buy something called Debrox. It's an ear wax softener. Then buy a bulb syringe. It has a narrow tube and a squeeze bulb on the end and every mother should know what it is. Use the Debrox as recommended on the package. Then try irrigating your ear with warm water using the syringe. That could gently remove the ear wax. If that doesn't work, you will likely need to go to the doctor and have it removed with a curette (special loop-tool used for scraping). Another thing you can try is if you have or know someone who has a water pik you can fill that with 1/2 warm water and 1/2 peroxide. One warning, don't fill your ear with cold water as it can make you get dizzy and nauseated. I used to remove ear wax in my job working for doctors.
Sabine
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i have a runny nose, how can i make it stop running, i have to present speeches tomorrow for a tournament and i dont want a runny nose. (link)
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There are over the counter sprays, such as Afrin, but don't use too much of that. There are also pills, like Claritin and pseudoephedrin. Good luck.
Sabine
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i was wondering if actions always speak louder then words. you see there is this guy, i talk to him more often then i see him, and when i talk to him, he's really sweet, he says that he loves me, so on and so forth. My dilemma is that when i see him somewhere public, like school, he acts like he doesn't want to be around me, or get to know me; but when i see him somewhere that's a little more privet he's sweet and carries on about how much he loves me, and thinks we should date. how should i take this? why is he doing it? and how can i get him to always act sweet? (link)
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There are two possible things he's saying:
1) I really don't like you, but if I can be sneaky about it and get what I want from you, I'll use you.
or
2) I really do like you, but I have to act tough and not let anyone know or I'll lose my reputation.
Either way, he's either immature or not to be trusted. I suggest that you point out his pattern of behavior, accept no denials, and let him know that either you're together in public as well as in private or you're not together at all.
Sabine
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gah, i missed the whole beginning. i missed it up until the little girl had to help meredith with the man. can someone pleaseeee fill me in, or just summarize the episode? (link)
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Plot summaries are available from MSN usually and on www.abc.go.com. The whole episode will be available online for viewing tomorrow. I have the episode on TIVO and haven't watched it yet, or I'd answer more directly. :)
Sabine
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so i might be starting a job in a few months and its my first job ever haha but im scared i might fall asleep on the job. see i have this thing and everytime i get home from school i feel like just passing out which is weird because i get plenty of sleep during the night. is there anything i can do besides drink energy drinks,sodas,or coffee to keep me up throughout the day and not make me sleepy? thanks in advance
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Try adding a small snack that has a little bit of carbs backed by protein. Not sugar, because you'll crash, but something like peanut butter and crackers.
Sabine
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