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JunieBazinet
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about
I'm just an average person. I love to help people out :) it makes me feel better about myself. I've been in a lot of situations so I can most likely relate to a lot of your problems. I know what it feels like to not have anyone to talk to about your problems, which is why i'm an advicenator. I'm ready to help people and be there for everyone who needs advice or just a companion to speak out to. I'm always here if you need me, don't hesitate to drop a question or even just a vent/rant note about a problem to my advice column inbox. I respond to all of them regardless of the topic. I'm upfront and abrupt about my answers and never sugarcoat. Take my advice or not, but i'm just doing my job :)Played volleyball for over 10 years, also a coach. I love to try new things. Currently I'm trying the new sport of tennis and learning about my passion of photography.
advice
okay so i have been with my boyfriend for a year now and our relationship has been quite unhealthy...(fighting alot, cursing at eachother, no trust, on and off) and recently we were in a HUGE fight and i went to a party and got drunk and high and i went with my bestfriend her boyfriend and his friend. and his friend is one of my bestfriends too so at the party he sat on my lap and turned to my and said "kiss me" and im not NO and hes lie comoen just do it and i gave him a kiss and I FEEL SO TERRIBLE ive been crying and i love my boyfriend i feel so terrible... also the boy i kissed is my boyfriends good friend so i cant tell him! or else i wont have a boyfriend or a friend :( idk what to do i feel so guilty its killling me im not happy anymore i just wanna be happy. please give me your advice. thank you.
i highly suggest telling your bf what happened..
A- you'll feel LOADS better that you got it off your chest
B- your bf would appreciate the fact that you're HONEST, and not hiding it from him
C- if he does break up with you, karma. it was your choice to get drunk and high.. numbero uno bad decision.. pay the consequences.
D- whatever happens..happens. everything happens for a reason. if he breaks up with you.. then it wasnt meant to be. if he forgives you, it teaches you a lesson never to do it again.
E- FORGIVE YOURSELF. the past is the past. this is the present. whatever happened in the past is over now. you cant go back and change it. why bother dwelling on the past if its just going to hurt you..?
F- learn from your mistakes.
there ya go. my biggest advice is to just forgive yourself, say sorry, move on. whatvever happens happens. just go with the flow. you cant change what happened.. so its just best to move on.
So , we use to talk a lot , and now he some how got a job didn't tell me , and he doesn't text me at all anymore... I wait to talk to him all day , and he doesn't call me until I tell him too , or he says he will and never does , and he at the same time asks can I see you this week? And before he'd always be like asking more like want to hang out , why not , and now if i say no its like... its okay , like what's going on? Honestly he doesn't text me at all anymore...
please help
he could be hiding something from you. he could be involved with another girl. he could just be avoiding you and possible future drama/issues.
or...
he could just really be busy. he could have lost interest in you. he could just be living his life..
honestly, i think you shouldn't be so obsessed. i'm assuming you 2 aren't dating. so why obssess over a guy who isnt going out with you? why go through all of this drama and trying to find out his personal life if he's just a friend? would you like it if one of your friends was prying into your life and trying to figure out everything you're doing and who you're talking to and what you're doing thats so time consuming?? i would get annoyed at whoever tried to pry into my life like that...
its his life. back off. my opinion is that you're way too clingy to this guy. i think you like him more than a friend. you have to if you are this obsessed with him.. talk to him. tell him how you feel.
now i may be wrong.. you may just think about him as a friend. but from the looks of it, you're creeping on his fb page and this random chick, checking his relationship status, stressed on how many times he texts you, and really bothered that he may be busy. it just sounds like you like him more than a friend. if so, let him know. how are you 2 ever going to be together unless you dont tell him how you feel..?
if you dont like him like that, then back off. its his life. if he needs to tell you something, he will. dont cling on to him and annoy the crap out of him. let him come to you. be patient. its just a dude. go hang out with other friends until then.
So my boyfriend's little brother and I go to school together. Everytime I go to his house or I see him at school he takes special interest in me and what I'm doing. He likes to play with my hair or if I'm wearing boots he plays with them and any type of jewlery I wear he takes it of and puts it back on me. I've seen him do it to several other girls but not the way he does it to me, oh yeah and he likes to touch my face a lot. The scary part is that I have more in common with him than I do with my boyfriend so I ask this...Do his feelings for me go far more then friendship and if they do, What should I do?
hahah i just lol'd at the other persons advice haha!
i'm not sure how much younger he is.. but if he's like 8 years difference.. i would say talk to your boyfriend about it. thats creepy if his little brother likes you. just talk to your bf about it and just ask him to talk to his bro about it
if he's not that big of age difference. like 2 years.. then maybe you have more in common with him. its your call though. do you like him more than friends? or do you just see him as your boyfriends brother?
It's plain and simple. I am a young teen girl and for Christmas, I really want my OWN puppy, but I donno if my parents will let me. We already have 2 dogs and i love them both, but i think i want my own too. But I alwaays lose things so my parents dont think I am responcible.
Please help me! How am I going to show my parents I would be a great dog owner?!
you have to prove to them that you're responsible.
do things that show them you can do it.
clean your room (even though they didnt tell you that you had to) clean their room, clean the kitchen, do extra chores, take out your other dogs for a walk, comb them, feed them (make sure you tell your parents though), be on time when you go somewhere, help out your parents with stuff, do the dishes, study harder/longer.
just do anything that will make them realize that you want this bad enough and that you'll do anything to earn their trust and that you're responsible enough.
my face is really dry and its really bothering me! does anyone have any home remedies that will help moistrize my face? please and thank you?!
i agree with the other person. i use baby lotion and i've never had a problem with it.
if you do use a mosturizer that makes your skin overly oily, use oil abosrbing sheets or dust your face with baby powder.
Lets say I sing for half an hour a day. WIll I get better? I mean I suck at singing but rock at guitar and I write powerful songs, but my voice makes it sound bad. If I sing 30 minutes a day will I get better?
well practice does make perfect... but how do you know you're getting better?? do you have a teacher there with you to help you get better? do you have a tuner which tells you when you sing out of tune? do you record yourself singing and then play it back? do you sing along with a song?
you can't "get better" at singing unless you actually work on it and know what you're doing wrong and fix your mistakes..
just by singing alone, wont help you. you need to understand why you dont sound good and then fix it.
its like doing homework and not checking if the answer is right or wrong.. how do you know if its right or wrong if you dont check to make sure? how do you know you're getting better unless you know what your mistakes were? same thing with singing.. you have to know what the problem is. you cant just sing and expect to get better without knowing why you suck at it.
I need a new face wash/moisturizing routine. I have really dry skin that gets oily pretty quickly. My skin is sort of sensitive, I don't usually use anything that has strong fragrances. I use BareMinerals powder foundation and whatnot. After I shower, my skin feels very tight and if I smile, it feels like it is being stretched out and sort of hurts.
So basically, what is the best routine (including products) to use for my face? Types of face wash (brand, foam or cream etc.)? Best moisturizer that moisturizes skin but does not make excessively oily? Would really appreciate comments by personal experience :] Thanks!
i've gotten a lot of comments on my skin on how its clear and soft and never oily or flakey.
here's what i do
i only wash my face once a day. usually in the shower (steam helps open your pores and cleans your skin better) then after the shower i put on a moisturizer. i just use plain old baby lotion. it makes your skin super smooth and does not make it oily. then i carry around a pack of oil absorbing sheets just in case i need them. they are only like 3 dollars at a drug store. I specifically use Clean and Clear products. I've been using them for a long time and find them the most reliable for me. but thats my skin, so yours may not be the same. then at night i use Oxy acne spot cream. i just put it on my face where i have some acne and it goes away after like a day.
for you, i suggest using a good mostiurizer. look for one that is strong for really dry skin, but doesn't have oil substances in it. if it does have oil substances in it, dont fear because you can just use oil absorbing sheets which will make your skin oil free :)
also here's a trick, if you cant get oil absorbing sheets, or if you just need a quick refresh and want to make your face look clean, take a small powder brush and dip it into some baby powder and just quickly dust your face with baby powder. i know it seems weird, but it works. the powder absorbs oils in your face.
1 more thing.. oil is ok on your face. TOO MUCH is bad, but you need to keep in mind that SOME oil is ok. otherwise it will dry out and cause flakey skin.
I'm a 19 year old, 5 foot 8 1/2inch, 120lb, European girl that's lived in the United States for a few years. Miami to be exact. I'm going to a great university here on scholarship and doing well. I'm very smart. My parents are proud of me, but everyone that meets me says that I should be modeling. It matches my lifestyle and even personality a lot more than my current major does (international relations/politics). I'm very good at what I do in school however I always have doubts if this is really what I want to do. I'm an upbeat, fun, exciting person and aesthetics make me very happy. I mean nice places, beautiful things, they affect me more than they should I guess. I also love traveling but not just the part that everyone loves, I love everything about it. The airports, the hotels, everything. I don't really see myself doing anything when I'm older, I only chose my major because I love learning about cultures of other countries and lifestyles. I know I'm still young and have time to figure it out, but what I cannot deny is that I love to model, and am repeatedly being convinced by everyone I should be doing that! I've told my parents the idea that I had, that maybe I could model when young and finish school later but they don't see any value in this at all. They think I would be throwing it all away to do something that wont last. And I know it might not last but it's my life and I know in my heart that I could really be successful at this, it feels more than a dream, it feels reachable. I've modeled runways before and done print but my parents haven't really made it easy for me to get out there. And are we not all supposed to follow our dreams? I just don't know if its worth disappointing all the people that are so "proud" of me. I don't know what I should do...any advice???
let me ask you this.. is this YOUR life? or is it theirs?? are they going to be the one living it in 20 years?? or are you going to be living it in 20 years??
the answer: YOU. its YOUR life.. not theirs.
yes, their opinions do matter and yes parents are sometimes right. but make them realize that its your life and you should do what makes YOU happy.
i've learned this the hard way.. you cant please everyone. you'll be MUCH happier if you do things that make YOU happy and not what makes others happy.
good luck and inbox me if you have more questions. i'm also european!!! :) go europe! haha
ADDED: I dont think you should entirely drop school and leave to take modeling. I think you should still stay in school but take a month or a few off and find a good reliable modeling agency. I'm not experienced with agencies but you could ask around. maybe look at magazines to see if they have modeling agencies on there? or search the web? i'm not so sure but i wouldn't recommend dropping school just for modeling because what if modeling doesnt work out?? then it would be difficult to get back to school. if you can, i highly suggest looking for an agency during the summer when you have more free time and are out of school. after you find an agency, i dont know what will happen. you should talk to them and see what you can do for a career and they will help you plan it out/organize it. And I'm from Sweden fyi haha :)
I am a 14 year old male in high school and I'm pretty sure everyone thinks that I am gay.
Around 6 months ago my male friend and I were discussing Lady GaGa and the "hermaphrodite" thing. I jokingly said that if people say she has a penis it must be true, then my friend said "Well people think you are gay, does that make it true?". I was shocked, I then said "Pfft, people don't think I'm gay" which he then said "Yeah they do. Everyone does".
In year 6 a girl asked me out who I rejected, I then went out with my previous next-door-neighbor who lived in a different state which no one believed. I then went out with some slutty chick and dumped my girlfriend for her. This chick was a huge slut and she wanted to have sex which was really weird for me at the time. So at high school I hardly ever talk to girls and just hang out with my small group of friends.
I'm a pretty shy guy, I get really quiet when I am introduced to someone who I haven't talked to much which is every girl at the school. I am pretty bad at starting conversations with people that I don't know well. I am fairly ugly but my slut ex-girlfriend said that I am "not ugly but not hot". I have really big lips which I think could contribute to the gay thing possibly.
So I don't talk to many girls, I have been asked out twice. First time I knew it was a joke because that girl was wayy to hot so I said no. Second time it was an ugly girl who my friends hated, I said no. This was all last year. This is the year where I have realized that everyone thinks I am gay. About 3 people have come up to me and asked if I was gay, and when I deny it I'm pretty sure they don't believe me. The ugly girl who I rejected told this openly gay guy to yell "Hey James, Hey James, Hey James" at me repetitively which I pretended to ignore. There is also this girl who used to like me who I never made a move on.
So what do you think I should do to prove that I am not gay? Ask out some girl? I am ugly so I don't know if I could. Please help me.
listen to the other advicenator before me. why do you care what other people think?? if someone asks you if you're gay, ask them if they pick their nose..
its honestly really ridiculous if you think about it. if people are making such a big deal out of it, i would just be annoyed and say "back off i really could care less about what you think. if you want to believe it, then fine go ahead. i really dont care."
its like if you wore sandals in winter and people made fun of you because you were too poor to afford other shoes.. just ignore them and show them that you could care less about what they think.
your problem is that you dont have self confidence. you're calling yourself ugly.. which is not ok. make a list of everything you love about yourself and what others love about you.
also, why the heck do you need to "prove" that you're not gay. no one is forcing you to prove it. don't ask out a random girl just because you want people to like you.. that is extremely selfish. you're gonna end up hurting that girl because she will find out that she was just used and that you never liked her.
unless you do ask out a girl you like. which is ok. don't be scared of girls. what the heck are they going to do to you...? they arent gonna like eat you... they aren't gonna kill you.... worse case is that a girl says no. big deal... woopdie doo... life goes on. move on. you're gonna face SOOOO many rejections in life. you have no idea what you're gonna face with in life. this is nothign compared to what will happen in the future. learn to deal with this right now. if you dont overcome your fears right now, you're never gonna be able to handle the grown up problems..
have self confidence. have courage. have strength. stand up for yourself. dont be pushed down by people who dont matter. you cant please everyone in the world. there will be people who dont like you. you cant change yourself just to please others. tell them to deal with it. if they dont like you, tell them to look away. dont change yourself just for the happiness of others. do what makes you happy. if you dont please everyone else, then thats too damn bad for them.
you can do this. inbox me if you need more help.
What is a nickname I could give my friend marquis?
how about quisquis. (key key or keke) or kiks (keeks) or mark, marcus, marco and polo.
I'm junior girl in high school. One of my very best friends is going out with this guy. He's in a couple of my classes and i've gone to school with him since elementary school so i know him pretty well. But he gets in fights all the time and gets suspended; he's kind of violent sometimes. He's really funny and nice, but he's scary when he's mad. I sometimes think he might do drugs or something, and i'm scared for my friend because she's the most innocent person i know. She would never hurt anyone or do anything bad. The other day, i was joking around and i didn't know he was mad, and he got pissed at me and shoved me really hard almost knocking me down. He then screamed in my friend's face and ran off. She was so embarrassed and kept apologising to me, even though i wasn't hurt at all, just shocked. I didn't think he would ever hit a girl, even if it was just shoving me. I've been worrying ever since then that maybe he hits or shoves around my friend too, but she won't tell anyone, and even if he doesn't, i don't think she should be going out with him. He's just bad news. I talked to my other friends and they said they have seens him scream at her before and curse in her face. What should i do? Do i ask her to break up with him? Should i talk to him? should i tell someone else? i'm so confused and scared for my friend :( Help me!
oh my gosh. ok you need to talk to your friend about it. alone. tell her that you don't like his attitude and the way he treats people. tell her exactly what you told us. that you've seen him swear at people and shove people and abuse people. tell her that you think he's a bad influence on her and that you really care about her and don't want to see her get hurt. ask her "truthfully did he ever abuse you?" also, you HAVE to understand that this is HER choice. not yours. you can't change her mind. you can't force her to break up with him. what you CAN do is let her know you care, that you'll always be there for her, and that your OPINON is that she should break up with him. dont tell her "you really should". just simply say "i think you should because i feel like he's a bad influence on you and i really care about you and dont want to see you get hurt"
if she gets mad for some reason, calmly tell her that you're not trying to control her, but rather let her know what you're thinking and let her know that you're there for her.
then i think you need to talk to him about it too. calmly ask him if there's something wrong, if he needs someone to talk to. don't be bitchy about it like- what is wrong with you? you need an attitude adjustment. that will piss him off. just ask him if things are ok with him and ask him why he's been in a bad/weird mood lately. tell him "i know you've changed because your attitude shows that something is wrong". also, let him know that you're there for him. let him know that you care about him and if he needs to talk that you'll be listening. most abusive people are abusive because they lock up all their emotions because they dont have anyone to talk to about them. if you let him know that he can talk to you, he wont have to bottle up his emotions, therefore wont be abusive.
i would also suggest telling someone else. a parent. a teacher. counselor. anyone who is older that can help. if this is how he is acting right now.. who knows what could happen if he's really ticked off.. i've heard about people bringing weapons to school because they were so abusive. make sure you tell someone. you dont want to think that "if i would have told someone than this woulnd't have happened.."
good luck and inbox me if you have more questions.
Ok so this really stinks I am getting bugged at school by this girl Kayla and her friend Megan. I used to be friends with both of them but not anymore because they were being mean to my best friend Laura. Anyway its not really bad but they bug me enough to get annoyed. I really dont get why the want to harrass me because it makes no sense I did not even do anything to them except for stand up for Laura when they were saying mean things to her. This crap is so overated and it feels like I'm in third grade or something. I can't take it!!! ....also there is this boy who I like alot I've known him since elementary school and I know that he likes me too. The only problem is that he is dating Megan the one who is harrassing me. Also I already have a boy who keeps bugging me to go out with him and if I went out with the other guy who I like and is going out with megan then the boy who is bugging me would be really mad at me. I still want to be friends with him and I dont want to hurt his feelings but I dont know what to do, I wish this was all so much easier. I asked my Mom about this but what she told me I already knew. Thank you for your time and advice.
ok so i'm gonna break this up into smaller questions/answers.
1. i wouldn't worry about kayla and megan.. the reason why most girls are mean to other girls is basically because they don't have any self confidence. they feel better if they make someone else feel worse about themselves. basically, they want to feel better about themselves by putting other people down. its not right. good for you when you stood up for your friend Laura. we all need a friend like you. i've had times when i've always wanted a friend like you, someone to stand up for me. you should be proud of yourself for doing that. i mean it. as for kayla and megan, you have to have this attitude that says "i really could care less about you guys and if you feel like putting me down to make you feel better is helpful, then i feel sorry for you guys" you can either stand up to them and call them out and say "what you guys are doing is wrong and i feel bad for you because you have to go through so much effort just to have self confidence and feel better" call them out on it and let them know that what they are doing is ridiculous. laugh at them if you want to. i know i would. laugh at their face and just laugh at the fact that they are so immature if they want to make themselves feel better by going through all of this drama. then walk away. ignore them. show them that they mean NOTHING to you. show them that they are worthless pieces of s*it and have nothing. don't be scared of them. be strong, courageous, show them that you're the boss and that they are little miniture rats who are just waiting to be crushed one day. sorry if thats a little extreme ha ha but just give them their own medicine. ya know? you don't have to be overly mean.. but just make them realize that they are literally nothing and they shouldn't think they're "all that".
2. as for you and that guy who is dating megan.. i would back off. he's in a relationship. especially since its with the girl who is harassing you. if you interfere with their relationship, it could cause MAJOR drama between you and megan. so just make everything like a bajillion times easier and back off. i'm guessing you're still a young teenager. he's probably not even worth it in the first place. if it was worth it, fate will find a way to bring you 2 together. but as of now, i would just stay out of it and dont meddle/interfere.
3. as for the other guy who likes you. just talk to him nicely one day (in person) and say "hey look. i know you like me more than friends but i was actually hoping of just a friendship. i hope thats ok with you. sorry" yeah you might hurt his feelings, but thats the way life works.. you can't please everyone. you're always gonna end up hurting or disappointing someone. even the ones you love the most. i would know because i've done it before and it sucks. he will learn to deal though. life is tough. he's gonna get many many more rejections in life. tougher ones like job interviews or other things. he will learn from it and life goes on.
good luck and inbox me if you have more questions!
PS: if they keep harassing you, id talk to someone about it. your parents, a teacher, a school counselor...
I need a job. I'm fifteen and live in Il. I want a good paying job. Is there any buisness that will hire me? (Please no one say babysitting)
here's an idea...
why dont you just drive around and go to stores the entire day and ask if they're hiring. make a list of all the places that say yes, then ask for a job application there and pick your favorite.
I want to do something new with my hair but I'm not sure what! Should I dye it darker or lighter?
Thanks!
http://tinypic.com/r/11ryk3t/7
i think you should do something different. something bold. something that makes you stand out from the rest of typical teenage american girls. look around.. you'll see almost every teenage girl wear their hair long and with sideswept bangs.
different is good sometimes. we need different in the world. now, i'm not talking about dying your hair orange or something crazy like that (howvever, if you want to.. then go ahead) but i'm saying do something you normally wouldn't do. like dye your hair dark brown and cut a few inches off. or go for a blonde look with highlights and go shorter look. maybe try getting a perm (doesn't have to be the super curly kind. it can be a wave perm) or you can get a straightening perm. try highlights or low lights. if you're extra bold, try a contrasting type of highlights. i know that this particular style is very "in" right now... blonde hair but then black hair underneath/the bottom half. i've seen a few girls try it out and i like it. its something different and its starting to get a little popular.
or you can even try a different color for highlights. like brown hair with red highlights (not bright red.. but like brown red) or black hair with red highlights.
try looking at bangs too. maybe across the forehead? instead of sideswept. its something different. it was in style a while ago but went out of style when the sideswept came in. so give that a shot if you want.
maybe try parting your hair differently. like down the middle instead of side part. or even try a zig zag part.
you can be extra bold too if you want to try cornrows. which is when you hair is full of tiny little braids tied tight to your scalp. you can choose if you want to braid the entire head, or if you just want to braid the top half and then the bottom can be whatever you want.
there's lots of options. try going to a hair salon and asking for more styles. there's also the bob look which is when the hair is short in back and semi-long in front. not sure if you'd like it but its an idea. just search around and you'll come up with something.
idk i went to the restromm and then i saw brown blood does it mean i started my period plzz help me
yes.
Ok i want a new tattoo but i have so many ideas i dont know what to get, i love zebra and lepord print and color things but i also want to get some meaningful words because im a strong and loving person. I was like somwhere on my foot or something. I could really really use some ideas and pics of cute things like asap oh by the way im 19/f if that helps all suggestions are welcome :) thank you!
i dont have any ideas but you should really consider getting a tatoo before you actually get one.. tattoo=ink=permanent... do you really wanna be known as that grandma with wrinkly skin and the wrinkly tattoo??
in my opinon, tattoo is just like fashion. one day its "in" and "hot".. then the next day its considered "out of style". wait a few years and you'll see that its going to be old news and nobody will like them anymore. that is my opinon but if you disagree then go for it.
i just thought you should know that you need to look at the consequences first before you make a decision.
so , i'll tell you part of the story , he told me from the start he is not getting back into the army , and so I believed him. But after a while , 4 days ago or 6 he started to act weird , he didn't text me as much and nothing. So , I was like okay , i'll let it go, as the day's went by he never really texted me , he use to text me in the morning , and now he doesn't , and at all nothing , and he's like i feel sick and everything sorry I was working and tired , so I let it go , and now he said oh you should call me and he never got back to it and today he was like oh i'll call you I miss you and he never does , and like when I asked him what his job was , he said paperwork at the military place..... isn't it weird how he said that? and he doesn't even say goodnight ever or even the fact that he says''my mom is being dumb. Sorry babe'' but like I understand the work it's just he never told me about it and it would be nice for him to say goodnight once in a while or drop me a text , he never does anything anymore...
what should I do?
try making the first step and YOU saying goodnight. see if he responds. if he doesn't he probably is just really busy. everybody has those times when they are really busy for a while and have a stressful week.
if you're really that worried about it, just go over to his house or something or ask if you can meet up and talk to him about it calmly. ask him what's going on.
hey tanx again u really amazing. i guess i need some time to actually think about what i really want..
i have something else to ask you... on the 7th next tuesday is his birthday and i dont know if i shouls sms him coz he never wished me for my birthday this year im not sure if he forget or was just being arrogant but i dont know what to do... :)
i would do it.
there's always that saying that says "treat others how you want to be treated" yeah i get that you want to get back at him because he never said happy birthday to you.. but you should be nice, regardless of what he's done.
its like if someone ignores you in the hallway, and the next time you see them you should be the first person to say hi. then that person will know that you're nice and thoughtful.
you don't even have to say much. just simply say "have a happy birthday and a great day :)" thats it. you don't have to go overboard and send him a text in all caps and a thousand !!!!. unless you really want to.. but my suggestion is to say it but don't go overboard with it.
So I started dating my best friend about a month before he left for college, which is four hours from where I am. When he left he said that we'd put it on hold, but when he came home a few weeks later we acted as if he had never left. The next time he came home was a month or so later, and he told me that he is way too busy with school and it wouldn't be fair to me to keep going. However, we unexpectedly(to both of us) hooked up before he left. I haven't seen him in over 2 months but we still chat almost everyday and in a few weeks he'll be back for an entire month. A close mutual friend seems to think we'll get back together for that time and then break up again when he leaves. I have very strong feelings for him and although we were friends before, I don't think I can go back to that. I want to tell him that I want to try to make it work but I don't want to sound pathetic or needy. I also don't want to just hook up all the time when he's back and not be together. It would be difficult to be try to make it work but I think it's harder the way it is now. Help?
well obviously you tried and it didn't work...
what you need to do is decide whether he's worth it. is he the kind of guy whom you are in love with and want to be with after college? do you see you and him together in the future after college? if you answer with a no, then i say its best to end it and stay friends. you're in college. enjoy it. don't be stressed with long distance drama and complications unless you absolutely say yes to the question of "do you see him in your future".
talk it out with him and see what his opinon is. ask him what he thinks and if he see's you in his future. talk it out and try to come to an agreement with him. even if it's just taking a break and seeing how things go.
my ex and i broke up because we were unsure of our feelings and then realized we missed each other a lot and contemplated on getting back together. it didnt happen. but my point is.. sometimes you need to run away/ get away to realize what you really want in life and what is most important. meaning, maybe you just need a break from him and see how you feel. if you miss him, he could be worth it. if you find yourself thinking about other guys, he might not be worth it. but careful.. id give it a while longer than a few weeks. because the first few weeks after a break up is when you think about him the most. after a few weeks, thats when you decide if you still think about him or if you've moved on.
Well i am really skinny, but barely have any muscle. I have a nice body but i want to work out more often so i can maintain my body and when im older i will look good and not just skin and bones.
what would be some work out tips for people that are skinny but want to grow muscle? Thanks!
well first, gain muscle tone by lifting weights. if you have a gym in your town, sign up for the gym and also ask if you can have a personal trainer help you. at my gym, we play about 50 dollars per lesson for a personal trainer. its really helpful because all you do is tell them how many times you want a lesson per week, the vigorous level (beginner, medium level, boot camp) and pick female or male trainer and how long of a lesson and ba da boom they will have a complete work out for you. they also ask you what you specifically want to work on. name anything. improving your vertical, muscle tone in upper or lower body, ab workouts, flexibility etc.
if you can't do that, then just find some weights or anything heavy and lift them. but you have to do it properly. (another good reason to get a personal trainer because they will show you the safe way to lift to prevent injuries or strains). there's a ton of tutorials on weight lifting on youtube or any other website. just type in workout tutorial upper body or lower body.
keep lifting weights. make sure you lift every other day maximum. its important to keep a day or a few of rests in between workouts to give your muscles a break. also i suggest eating or drinking protein. protein helps you build muscle faster and is VERY good for you.
then after you've built some muscle tone (takes a few weeks at least) then i would decrease the amount of workouts. if you work out a lot a build a ton of muscle, you have to keep working out to make the muscle stay. what happens if you stop working out? the muscle turns to fat. which is what is common in older people, especially athletes who are stronger when they are younger and then lose the muscle which turns to fat when they are older.
so yeah, keep wokring out but reduce it to a few times a week (once or twice) and then the rest of the days, i highly suggest taking aerobics class. try kickboxing, karate, dancing, pilates, biking, running, swimming. this is not aimed specifically at your muscles (which is lifting weights) but it is aimed for stamina and maintaing your health. aerobics is basically an all around type of activity. it builds endurance, keeps you in shape, builds some muscle but not enough to make you builky/bodybuilder style.
to answer to your feedback- yes that is exactly what i'm saying :) when you work out every other day, it is building your strength and health. by switching it to once or twice a week, that is basically just maintaining your health so you keep a steady and constant healthy life :)