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Me & Seth are best friends and have been for 3 years now. He's 18 and a senior in high school, I'm 15 softmor in high school. I've had my heart broken before Seth was there and comfurted me. I'm nervous that my last heart break(march '09) might have affected me liking him. Either way I like him, what should I do?
-Quinnie
(female 15, usa) (link)
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i dont think you should let the guy that broke your heart affect the relationship you have with seth..not all guys are the same.if you let him affect you youll be alone your whole life and no one wants that..he hurt you so you pick up what youv got left and make those pieces grow with seth
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16/f
I'm not trying to sound conceited when I say this, but I am a really good friend. I have helped people stop cutting and feel better about themselves. (only my close friends who tell me things) I tell them to get help and try to help them as much as I can to the best of my ability. I'm kind of like the go-to person, the one they vent to, then one they can trust.
So today, my best friend and I were talking on aim. and we were talking about how we felt we were drifting apart. we got mad at eachother at first because she accused me of judging her (when I don't, I really don't judge people, everyoneis who they are) and she wasn't acting herself. Then we got to the point in the conversation where she told me that she wasn't going to beg for me to be my friend, and I told her that I'd always be her friend, no matter what. Because she's been having a hard time lately, and has been going to the shore drinking alot and hooking up with random guys at random parites, and it's just not her.
Then she always blames everything on her ex boyfriend, how he screwed her up so much. and he did, he really messed her up, but i said she had to stop blaming him for everything, and that it's not her fault at all but that part of why she changed was because of the shore and summer. well, I guess that set her off, because she told me something that I cried when I read...
Her ex boyfriend, you would never suspect he would do this. He forced her to do stuff to him. (she never told anyone, this happened a few months ago) he told her that she didnt trust him and that she didnt find him attractive if she didnt give him a handjob. I knew that part, but I also knew that he ate her out when she told him she didnt want to. and he fingered her when she didnt want to be fingered and said so. He would get very violent with her and shove as many fingers as he could and finger her, and she tried to stop him, and tell him no but she couldn't breathe and he was bigger than her. Then she told me that one time, she was in his car and they were fighting as usual, he was telling her like, "oh i went to third for you and you won't do the same to me?" and she said, "i didn't want you to do that to me!" and he was like, "well it's been 2 or 3 months and if you loved me you would do this for me." so my friend ended up being guilted into saying she'd make it up to him by giving him a handjob. after she said that, she didnt know how it happened, but he pushed her head down to his pants and held her head there while he unzipped and he made her give him a blow job. she told me she was crying while she did it and he wouldnt stop. (i feel horrible not only because he did this to her, but because we talked about blow jobs and how id never give one ever and how she wouldnt either.. i felt bad she didnt tell me this!) so then like whenever they hung out, apparently he would just jump ontop of her and hold her down, and hump her, and shed say get off, but he wouldnt listen. and then when he was "finished" she could go home.
she told me that he told her he was gonna kill himself. she was scared. she was trapped inside a relatiosnhip with this guy. isnt that RAPE?!?! I told he to tell someone, she won't. I want her to get help, I told her she should get therapy, that i'd help her. but she said telling me helped her feel better.. but she was pretending this entire time that she's fine. but she told me she's depressed. I rpomise her I wouldn't tell anybody about this, but THIS IS RAPE. isn't it?! It is. my best friend was raped. and now all she wants is attention from guys. shes really screwed up because of this. Shes drinking because she doesn't think about her ex and what he did. I don't know what to do. please help me. I'm the ONLY ONE who knows. the only one. so what do i do?! I know I should tell someone, but who would I tell? and there's no proof he did that, so how would i be able to help? I promised her I wouldnt tell anyone, I know I should, but at the same time, she says she's not wasting her time on him. But if I was her, I would want to tell someone. I couldn't just hide that. I'm so lost. She acts like it's no big deal now.. just because it has been a few months. But it IS a big deal to ME. she's my best friend and he raped her. Well, I consider it rape. Ugh. help?
thank you all so much. (link)
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that fuckn bastard!!!!!i never swear but this asswhole deserves it!how dare he how could he..the same thing happened to me, this guy foced me to give him a BJ exactly the same way he did to your friend by holding her head down.
unfortunatly i was too scared to tell anyone but deep down i didnt want to tell anyone. it took me awhile to get over what he did but i got over it.she should know that counselling does help. but best is for you to be there for her, dont force her to do anything she doesnt want to because it could make her drift further and further away from you. she needs to be able to realise that your hurting and that you dont want her to turn out the way shes heading..just be there for her and tell her that what happened in the past happened and that the person inside her that was hurt and used should be protected so that it doesnt happen again, but the way shes going it will
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If my uncles were to get married in Massachusetts and moved to another state that does not perform civil unions or same sex marriages, will they still be considered married by the state?
Also, what's the difference between a civil union and gay marriage? I know obviously there is a strong social meaning to saying you're "married" but my mom said that because of the Defense of Marriage Act, even if youre a gay couple married in Mass. that on a federal level, you aren't given any benefits?
Thanks (link)
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no they wont be considered married if that state does not recognise their marriage certificate.
i think a civil union is a gay marriage..not sure because here in new zealand they only have civil unions theres no such thing as gay marriage but i could be mistaken
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ok so, i have the password to my brothers facebook. i log on to it a few times to check out recent pics and vids of my friends in the band, i dont have one, nor do i want one, thats why i use his. i logged onto it the other day and he had a conversation up with one of his buddies, admitting that he was high. that got me thinking, when your high, do you know you are? i thought it kinda made you crazy and your not thinking of reality. idk what to do anymore. he just had his buddy over and my brother went to the bathroom then him and his friend went into my brothers bedroom and i heard my brother's friend say "you made that? impressive." that only got me thinking did my brother concoct a drug in the bathroom? i dont want to go and tell my mom about this in fear of losing the relationship i have with my brother. i just dont want him getting high and doing drugs all the time, he's such a smart kid and he has such a life ahead of him. what do i do?! (link)
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the comment below me was abit harsh, your his brother ofcourse you cant mind your own business when you have a hint your brother is smoking weed.
The answer to your question, weed doesnt make you crazy and you do know who you are. weed makes you dizzy and tired and saqy dumb things.
other serious drugs like P can make you crazy and forget who you are..weed can lead to ppl taking more serious drugs.
I really do hope your brother stops it because drugs will dumb him down and hell start to have bad memory.
dont talk to your mum because it will just cause corruption in the family and hell never trust you again.
approach your brother and just let him know that you know hess been taking drugs or his friends have been and that your really hurt and disapointed.
tell him that if he loves you hell stop because you know what it can do to people and if he says that its non of you business and that he wont stop taking it then just dont speak to him for awhile so that hes aware hes hurt you..
in the end you cant stop him, he has to want to stop..i hope for his sake hell stop iv seen reallllly bad things happen to people who take drugs
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how are you supposed to get rid of zits before they come up? I can feel one in my chin and it really hurts but you can't see it yet...is there any way I can get rid of it soon? I don't want a big zit on my chin the first day of school (in two days!)
any help is appreciated : ) (link)
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thats kind of hard but try using a gentle scrub then put aloe vera gel on it
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i dont know if i really care for this person as much as he does for me i think everytime i am around him i get a little tickle in my belly and i dont know if that is a sign of love or something else i am 13 about to be 14 and i am a girl (link)
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everyone has their own definition of love..to love is when you cant stop thinking about that person day or night, when you smile everytime he calls or txts you. you would do anything for that person. love is a strong word but if you get a tingle when your around him i think it just means you like him alot but love is much more than that
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If a girl has sex with a guy who has hiv/aids, and he uses a condom and does not even ejaculate at all, can she still contract the disease? (link)
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no but theres still a chance she can..usually people with aids sleep with people who also have aids
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Ok so here's the thing. I'm 18 and I go to college.. I've had a few boyfriends here and there it's never been anythoing too serious. But lately I've been thinking about girls. I mean I'vr never been with one and all the girls i know have only been my friends but I'm so intrigued. I want to see what it' like to date another female. But I'm nervous. And confused? Am i bi? Or am i just curious? Geez. I need help.. (link)
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to me i think your bicurious..dont worry i went through that stage, id even check girls out. your only bi when youv actually been with a girl and enjoyed it...researchers say that the only reason girls are with guys is because of the different body parts. But if girls ended up with man parts then girls would be going out with girls because of their personality and how well they get along and understand eachother. hope this makes sense
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Hey you all..I have this huge problem that needs fixing a.s.a.p! Ok..you see..when I wuz a junior in high school,I had this huge crush on this boy named aj.Can you say fine! But the thing wuz that he was only in the tenth grade.We eventually exchanged numbers and would talk like EVERYDAY! we were like buddys that had huge crushes on each other.But with him being in a lower grade..i just couldnt find the COURAGE to date him.I just thought of the comments my friends would make.So i later found out that someone else had a crush on me.He wuz nice and cool so i decided to date him.Aj wuz crushed.Things didnt work out between me and the dude I started dating.He cheated on me with his ex girlfriend which crushed me but anthony wuz there to help me heal.So like a month passed and aj wuz still hinting that he liked me and that he wanted to date me but around that TIME another dude came in the picture..we will call him elliot.Me and elliot started dating.Aj wuz crushed.The whole time I wuz with elliot i just kept thinking about aj.He wuz my friend and i CARED about him so much but i had a boyfriend and didnt want to ruin things.Sadly,aj got kicked out of school and that wuz the last time I ever saw him.During the summer,me and elliot broke up becuz he wanted to play pimp daddy and mess around with all types of girls.I wuz so heartbroken.So just recently I realized that I made a huge mistake by dissing aj TWICE. I know that I have to live with my mistakes and that I should always be willing to give people chances no matter who they are.I juss cant get aj off my mind.I miss him so much..I guess he changed numbers or something cuz I never heard from him again.I would walk to the moon and back to have him in my life.If i ever had the chance to be with him again I would take it in a heartbeat.I know that deep down in my heart that i love him.So..could it be that the love of my life came and gone that fast? I hope not.So what do you guys think?..should I just get him out my head and accept the fact that he's gone...or should I keep hope alive and do a people search? I just got to find him..or least know were he is..my heart just cant rest until i know. Please help..i need some advice big time.. (link)
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awwww poor Aj he must of been shattered!ok so if you really doo love him then youd do anything for him.i mean you went out with two guys and he still liked you regardless its a big possibility he may love you back.
he tried chasing after you so now its your turn to chase after him..you love him then show it, find him, do whatever you can. dont make the same mistake 3 times!
If you love someone then theyr worth the fight...find him!
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Okay, so I have been not feeling right lately. I went tot he doctor, I had had strep, I was on meds, then I got off. I was still feeling bad, so I went back to the doctor, and they said it was just stress, but I have a hunch that it's wrong. Here are symptoms.
- Energy-wise, I have been about 80% energetic.
- I get horrible stomach pangs if I don't eat often.
- If I get up suddenly, I can't see anything: it's all black, and it goes away in about 20 seconds.
- Sometimes I feel nauseous.
- Once, I had a sharp, shooting pain underneath my tongue and down the front of my throat. It was really weird.
Any suggestions for what may be up? Or am I just crazy?
Thanks! (link)
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Depending on how many hours you sleep or how much your eating this can make your energy levels decrease.
the stomach pains could be because of the acids in your stomach trying to tell you that you need feed, this would probibly be because you havent had anythign to eat for hours.
nausea could be triggered by anything depending on the smell, place your in could even be because your not eatin, are you sure your eating right?
whith the pains in your jaw you may have TMJ google TMJ and see if those are the symptoms your getting.
if your really worried then go have a mole check and a full blood test and blood count because you could be low in iron
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17/f
high school senior
i cut my hair about 4 months ago, and its only grown to about my shoulders now.. I've gotten impatient w/ letting it grow out, so i purchased hair Extentions. they're just the clip in kind so that i don't have to wear them every day if i don't feel like it. i really like them because they blend perfectly with my hair and if you didn't know me you'd think it was my hair. anyways, my question is do guys find it weird for a girl to have fake hair in hers? its not really weird to me... but do guys find it a turn off? is it weird to have shorter hair one day.. then the next have long hair? is that weird and will guys be grossed out by it? please answer ASAP! thanks SO much to anyone who answers this:) lots of answers/opinions are appriciated:) (link)
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well guys like natural looks soo they could think its abit weird when you have short hair one day and then change the next, i think for me if probibly either choose to always put the extentions in when i go out or keep it short..it could be a turn off depending on the guy hope this helps and congrats on the hair extentions they sound really cool
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Dear Sia Thank you so much for the advice. I cried when I read it because I really felt you understood. The only word for my sister is cruel. Thanks Babs (link)
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thank you so much for messaging me, you should know that you made me feel so special when you wrote this. I can tell that you r one of a kind and the opposite of your sister. i do understand and its ok to cry and its ok to be angry. you have done nothing to deserve this. im always here for you if you ever need to talk :)
with love,
sia
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Long story short
The boyfriend and i are sitting in our apartment hosting a small birthday party, about 6 people, drinking a pony keg being fairly quiet and just hanging out.
My room mates boyfriend (whom also lives there) decides he is going to invite 15 people over. They are very loud and obnoxiuos, i go out and tell them to shut the hell up. All of the sudden they all run to the parking lot get in a fight. Cops are called, everyone runs into the apartment. We are all minors so we lock the door and get down to be quiet. The police say "were going to bust down the door" (they can not) but this scares some dumb ass kid into hopping out the window. ALl the police jump in the window we get on the ground. They confiscate my marijuana, pipes and all that. But inorder to do this they had to dig through my closet. They were there for people, not bongs. They broke my closet doors, my bed supports, my organ. Turned the AC down to 55 witht the window wide open for my cats to jump out and a robber to come in. My roommates and I were all arrested got procuring possession and parafonelia. My father is getting me an amazing attorney, but id like to know what exactly i am facing here. i turn 19 in two weeks. (link)
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apart from having a record they will give you a fine your you would get community service but i live in New Zealand..i dont even think they were allowed to search your place without a warrent
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I am usually the one giving advice but I am at a loss here as to what to do. Dating a wonderful man for 5 yrs. He is very successful in business and been divorced for 13 years. We waited for my daughter to go away to school to begin our "life together" under one roof. We have issues like every couple but are very much in love. He will basically do anything for me and treats me like gold. After all these years we are still like kids and text and e-mail love notes/exchanges 7-8 times a day. Basically we have a pretty perfect thing and I am madly in love with him. Before me (his ex really hurt him and left when he became ill now fully recovred) he had occasional GF's nothing overly serious. However before me he dated a girl almost 30 yrs younger for about 9 mos. Long distance so actually were only together a total of 8-9 times in all. She was a single mother, struggling etc. He was honest when we met and said he cared for her but it would never work out for many, many reasons, it wasn't love for him but apparantly for her. He broke it off and began dating me. He is used to people doting on him and has made it clear that he needs to feel loved at all times and that he will do the same. He has women friends from the past and I have never had any issues at all about his very occasional lunch dates, etc. except for with one women who has problem after problem and calls him constantly, mails gifts to his grandbabies (who she has never met), etc When I answer the phone she hangs up- you get my point? His theory is that if he were interested in her he could have dated her way before me and that he is a good person and enjoys helping others...instead of bickering about it, I just finally said, whatever. It is what it is, he loves me and he probably just enjoys the ego boost. THIS current issue however is different. I had both our cell phones last week and up popped a message from the girl from 5 years ago who he had broken up with. Basically telling him it was so nice talking with him, how she hoped she was not
interefering because she was aware he was in a relationship. She appreciated his advice helping her as her husband just filed for divorce and since he would be in San Diego next mo would love to meet him for a drink, etc. I basically felt the world fall apart when I read this. I have trusted this man with my entire being. I confronted him and he said she reached out to him etc and I should understand that he wants to spend the rest of his life with me, loves only me and that he was just a helping hand to a friend. He allegedly would have mentioned the calls and possible get together - he also called her for her b-day the same week and sent a cutsie text singing it as well...he would have mentioned them but did not know how I would react because he knows how I can "get" when it come to his so called women friends. I told him if he needed to get something resolved go see her and he said that is def not the case. It would just be because he is Calif once a year and it would be nice to see an old friend, etc I must be from another planet but I told him he is flirting with disater. This woman was crazy about him and broken hearted when he ended it. What purpose would it solve? People will do what they want regardless, especially men. So, again at a loss? What do I do, Tell him I really would appreciated him not meeting her for a drink? What purpose would it serve? That it's ok to continue phone/email coorespondence? He is 63, I am 45 and the girl in San Diego is 32. Sounds like he may need an ego boost...but do I stand by and allow it? I have never had nor wanted to tell a man what to do. You do what you feel is right. In the mean time, I feel, hurt, betrayed and obsessed with this person coming into our lives and upsetting it. I told him if she only wanted friendship then why no phone call a yr or two ago when she was happily married? Sorry for the rambling....Do I move in with him hoping that this will strengthen us and this nonsense will subside or ???? I do love him and in his defense he really does get off on helping all kinds of people, including men, kids, family. (link)
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ok firstly i think you need to count down from 5 and take a deep breath.
its ok i know how you feel and its not a nice feeling at all. even if this woman had intentions to move onto your man im sure he loves you and wouldnt risk it. he spent how long with you and left you for her he wants to be with you.to me it sounds like he wants to be with a woman he can form a life with form a never ending future and he knows your the one for him.
if you push the situation or tell him not to go then he may do it behind your back. this is just going to cause an arguement between you two. he only wants to be trusted.trrust him untill hes done soemthing bad right now he could be innocent and she maybe over him for good. just dont over analys the situation or your going to blow.men really hate to be told what to do.right now hes just being there for her but if you have one instinct that things dont feel right then thats when you tell him to stop talking to her. Start pulling the finger when you have evidence.
move in with him if you feel its the right time for both of you not because you think it will fix anything and by the sounds of it you too are soo inlove you should be living together
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i got a perm a few days ago and i love it its more like a body wave.. so its loser and not poodle like lol.
i have a few questions about it:
1. How do i sleep with it.. im like afriad to put it up i dont want it to get frizzy? or how should i put it up?
2. I usually do my hair in the morning everyday like i use Garnier Fructis Style Curl Shaping Gel or Treseme gel. And i ususally air dry it and i use a wide pick comb..i sometimes put a little bit of aussie hair spray in it my curls look fine when there damp but when they get dry they get frizzy.. what should i do? am i doing it right?
3. should i take another shower before i go to bed to get the gel and stuff out? that leads me back to my first question what to do with it before bed? like have the stuff in my hair still or put it up without anything in it? i just dont want to mess up the perm help! (link)
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heyy i know i dont have a perm but i have hair like the perm you got. the way i treat my hair is by having a shower a few hours before i go to sleep, then ill brush my hair normally and ill towel dry my hair(without rubbing, just dabbing the towel against my hair or wrapping it around my hair for about 5 to 10mins)then ill brush my hair again and after that ill use like a milk treatment to put in my hair and an anti frizz serum (make sure you put only a little bit of the serum to the end half of your hair) then ill twist my hair and roll it up in a bun. before i go to sleep ill let my hair out and sleep with it out. when i wake up it should be nice and soft with the curls.
try it like this but if it still goes frizzy use the serum when your hair is completely dry instead but make sure you only use alittle bit or itll look oily.
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Hey im an 18/f. Well in November 2008 i worked with this guy named Edde. and he was really cute and super nice. i kinda had a crush on him. but i only talked to him 2 times, but then he got fired. Well I go to community college now and i made some new friends and one of them knows Edde. Her name is Megan. She talked to him and he didn't remeber me at first but when he saw me he said you use to work at the great american cookie right? and i was like yeah. But anways she told me all this stuff about how he was dating this stripper who also goes to the same community college as us. They broke up cause she cheated on him and go pregnant but for some reason their still friends. Megan told me she's no longer friends with the girl because she thought she was trying to steal him from her. And it was all this unecessary drama and edde recently started drama with Megan so their not friends now. But i really like him and i still want to get to know him better but how do i do this with his ex g/f in the way and without making it obvious that i like him? Should i even talk to him? (link)
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heyyyo! ok well my advice to you is..go for it, try talkign to him make him trust you so that when she tries anything he wont believe her. make sure that your the one who looks good so if she is being nasty just be nice to her even try being her friend so she can trust you but not too good friends just a hi and bye kind so that she wouldnt try anything and so that your not close enough for her to try guilt tripping you.
just go for it make him see how nice of a person you really can be! dont worry about her she just seems like shes jealous and to be honest shes a cow for hurting him like that..go for it approach him and say hi bring up things he may like even ask him for lunch or something
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Dear Adviceanators: A few years ago my mom passed away. My sister who is in her fifties received my moms house of 130,000.and most of her money (about 80,000 dollars) I got a lum sum as well but not nearly as much as my sister. The problem is this my sister is a master manipulator. She worked very hard on my mom behind my back saying things like if I would give the house away If I got it. (both of our names were always on the house my mom told me) She also told my mom she needed more money than me because she need to fix up the house. I never new my name was taken off till after she died. You have to understand my sister is a lpn nurse who used to make 20.00 an hour. Before my moms house she lived in a trailer with hole in the walls. She always had the ability to make a good living instead she only worked 2 days a week just to get by. What bother more than anything is that she abused my mother physcially and mentally and my mom enabled this bum by buying her cars and giving her money and now my mother has just enabled her after she died as well. I get so angry at this whole situation still to this day. Espcially if I ride by my moms house and see her sitting there like she worked so hard all her life to get all these things. I do have to say that GOD had truly blessed me in my journey of not getting that house. I just feel she got away with what she did. Oh and also she plans to get one of those reverse mortages to live off of. Any advice? (link)
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ohhh what an evil sister!i dont know how she can sleep at night. her mother just died and all she wants is to get everything she owned.how cruil!
im really sorry i think you know by now that since its in your mother's will then you can change anything. shes a nasty person. if it was me i wouldnt talk to her. she hurt your mother and shes going to hurt you. a death can either make or break a family and i think your in position to choose which choice you want to take. she sounds pretty heartless and useless but dont loose hope because one day the world will turn a full circle and you will get what u deserve..im sorry about your mothers death and about your sisters cruilty i wish there was something better to say
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i need a bra how shall itell my mum please give advice (link)
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awwww!!ok well sit down with your mum and have a cup of tea with her. be like mum i want to ask you something but promise me you wont get angry or be awkward about it. then shell say yes dear ask me anything and then thats when you say, well mum i was wondering when the right time for me to get a bra will be. Tell her about how you feel and the reason why you want you get a bra even include her by asking if you two can both go together to buy some..make sure you two are both alone and the time is right so you wont be interrupted
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how do i talk to my mum about sex (link)
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well once your dads out of the house sit down with your mum having a cup of tea, and be like mum i can talk to you about anything without you judging me right?well i wanted to talk about sex,i mean everyones going to do it oneday and i just want to know what it is and how you do it bla bla just ask the questions you want to ask. be calm about it because it might put your mum in an awkward position
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i have a girl i know who has become like my older sister and its great. she works a lot and i dont get to talk to her that much (she lives in new hampshire and i live in ct) she just came to see me the other day and we had a great time and all we did was talk. but once she is back home we dont really talk unless something BIG with me happens like a new relationship or something like that. now i wont be seeing her as much as i used to because i would go to watch my brothers football games at the college they go to. now he graduated to i wont be up there as often...we would talk about how excited we were about going to the games and stuff so without that link i feel like i wont be so close...... she will always text me back (like she works till like 11 so when she gets out of i texted her while shes in work she will text me back at like 11:05) her and i are close, she will tell me anything i want to know and open up but i want to really be closer to her like have her call me and be like heyyyy guess what? or text and say hey but idk how to change that... either that or i want to text her more but i dont know what to say after heyy whats up and i miss you. im not really a good question asker. any ideass thanksss. (link)
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well maybe you can hang out with her more instead of meeting at the games...ask her about the games and how you feel. just imagine shes there infront of you what would you want to say to her? the more you see eachother the more youll bond.but when your txting you can ask how she is how her family is what shes upto how her work is talk about boys theres many things you can talk about or ask her about..its sooo sweet that you care so much to ask for advice, in the end you can only be yourself and see if that works
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